


Winter

by runawaycartoonist



Series: Monsoon [2]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Bad Science, Blowjobs, Body Horror, Car Chases, Eating out, Explosions, Falling In Love, I'll add more tags as i go, LGBT characters, Mad Science, Madness, Mayhem, Murder, NSFW, Nonbinary Character, Other, PTSD, Sequel, Sex, Strap on sex, Substance Abuse, Teen Angst, Torture, and mutants, handjobs, homophobia/transphobia, lgbt pairings, nobody knows what the fuck feelings are supposed to be, queer sex, rad escapes, rape mention, sci fi, shoot-outs, torture reference
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-30
Updated: 2017-02-24
Packaged: 2018-09-03 07:06:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 17
Words: 85,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8702230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/runawaycartoonist/pseuds/runawaycartoonist
Summary: Akio Sato is a prisoner. It's a relatively recent development, and it's not one that he sees himself getting out of anytime soon. His name is gone, and all that he's known by now is Subject 2103. His captors, the Monsoon company, intend on finding out every tiny aspect about his strangeness, whether he likes it or not.Levitan Reeves is free. It's a relatively recent development, and they plan to stay that way for as long as possible. However, they can't keep their freedom in good conscience knowing that their close friend is captured. They intend to get him back, and nobody's gonna stop them.EDIT: renamed from "Drought" to "Winter".





	1. On His Own

**Author's Note:**

> I wasn't planning on getting started on Part Two so quickly, but hey! Whaddaya know?
> 
> I'd like to take a moment to credit bloodsweettooth with being a super fantastic friend and ideas guy, and basically encouraging me to finish Monsoon! It was such a blast to write, and it was just the right push that I needed to get to the end.
> 
> I hope y'all enjoy the show!
> 
> WARNINGS FOR THIS CHAPTER: torture reference (although it's not onscreen), violence, reference to body horror, misgendering a character.

The room was small. Akio Sato could cross it in less than six paces. In it, there was a cot, a small desk and chair with books, pens, and notepads on it, a toilet and a sink. There were no windows, and there was only one door, which was locked from the outside by a recently-upgraded security system. Every surface was blindingly white, right down to the jumpsuit he wore that had the number 2103 stitched across the breast in blue.

He sat at the table, pen in his hand, his glasses sitting across from him. They had been provided for him by the institute. He missed his square frames. They suited him much better than these round ones, even with the tiny fracture in the top corner.

He could faintly see his reflection in the glass. Tired brown eyes, messy dark hair, skin that had taken on a paler tone from being indoors and fed an improper diet. He was a regular dreamboat.

Footsteps approached his cell. There was a clicking, and beeping as the passcode was entered in, then the door swung open.

Akio was on his feet in an instant, glasses back on his face, holding his pen like a dagger. Three men stood before him, one in a lab coat, and two in guard’s uniforms with the company logo written on the chest plates in blue.

As he stood here now, panting and wide-eyed like a cornered animal, Akio could hardly believe that he used to work for Monsoon.

“Subject Two-One-Oh-Three,” said the man in the labcoat. “You are wanted for questioning.”

Akio recognized him. His name was Dr. Michael Duncan. He’d used to have his desk right next to his. He didn’t bother attempting to plead with him, even though they had once been colleagues. There would be no point. He gripped the pen tighter.

Dr. Duncan could sense that he wasn’t about to go down easily. Worry flickered behind his eyes. “Two-One-Oh-Three, please cooperate or we will have to use force.”

Akio was breathing heavily through his nose. His heart pounded in his chest. He was terrified, but he knew that he couldn’t go down easily. To come quietly was to give in, and he wasn’t about to make their lives any easier, especially considering what he’d sacrificed.

Even though he knew his efforts would be fruitless, he launched himself at Dr. Duncan. He brought the pen down towards his face, and got one good blow in at his cheek, just under his eye. Dr. Duncan gave a cry of pain and staggered backwards, hand clasped over the sharp bruise that would later swell up into a nasty black eye. Akio tried to deliver another blow, but he was seized and slammed face-first down onto the table by the guards. His wrists were cuffed, but he still struggled against them. The pen was wrenched from his grip, and he was forced onto his feet. The guards steered him out of his cell and down the hall.

Akio fought. He tried to get his footing, he kicked out at their shins and he tried to twist away from their powerful hands, but it did no good. Even when he was getting a full night’s sleep and substantial meals, he wouldn’t have been strong enough to fight off these two massive men.

_ Levitan would have _ .

No, he can’t think like that. Levitan’s not gonna rescue him, this time. He’s on his own.

That last thought almost made him throw up in his mouth a little.

He was shoved into another room, and the door was locked behind him. He whipped around, but the door was sealed from the inside and his hands were bound behind his back.

“Take a seat.”

Akio turned. There was a table, with two chairs on one side and a stool on the other. On the far side of the table sat Dr. Roche, and on his left, there was his assistant, who was typing notes into a small computer. A recording device sat on the table.

Dr. Roche waited expectantly. “Well? Take a seat.”

“No.” He wasn’t gonna make this easy for them. Fuck that shit. Even though his knees were shaking and he felt like he was gonna puke his guts out from fear, he still held his ground. He had nothing left to lose.

Dr. Roche let out a breath. “I see that your stubbornness hasn’t subsided in the last few days. I can only say that it would have been nice if you’d had this resilient attitude when you were still my intern.”

Akio clenched his fists and tried to pry his wrists apart. His bonds held tight. “It would also be nice if I hadn’t been captured or thrown into a cell like an  _ animal _ , but things didn’t really work out that way, either.”

“Now, now,” said Dr. Roche chastisingly. “No need to be hostile, ‘Oh-Three. We can be civil to each other.”

Akio thought back to earlier that day when he’d been held down in order to extract a blood sample. He’d kicked and screamed, and they’d clamped a hand over his mouth to shut him up while they pushed the needle into his skin. “You’re implying that we should treat each other with mutual respect?”

“Indeed.”

“So…  _ I  _ should hold  _ you  _ down, stick you full’a needles, keep you locked up in a cell, and give you a number instead of a name? Cool, glad  _ that’s  _ cleared up.” He felt like his heart was trying to escape his ribcage, it was all he could do to keep the waver of fear out of his voice.

Dr. Roche offered him a wan smile. “Take a seat.”

“I’m good.”

“Suit yourself. I was merely attempting to be hospitable.” Dr. Roche didn’t move. The assistant continued to tap on the keyboard. “Subject Seventeen has rubbed off on you quite a bit, hasn’t it?”

At the mention of Levitan, Akio swallowed hard. He knew that they’d gotten away safe, that he’d been the only one captured in the fight. That was more than enough for him. He didn’t answer the question.

“I have to say, I’m very surprised,” said Dr. Roche. “Six months with the company and you were ready to abandon us with a snap of Seventeen’s fingers. I find that very interesting.”

“I find it interesting that you think I’m just gonna  _ tell  _ you what you want to know,” said Akio. He leaned against the wall, putting up a front of seeming casual. Not the most comfortable position for his arms, but it took some of the strain off of his feet.

“No, I don’t think you will,” said Dr. Roche, “but you’re not nearly as clever as you think you are, and there are more ways of getting answers than simply asking politely.”

Akio knew that he wouldn’t and couldn’t die at the hands of these people, but the idea of being  _ tortured  _ wasn’t one that appealed to him greatly. He could stand it if he had to. Well… he  _ would  _ have to.

“There’s nothing I can possibly tell you,” said Akio in his slowest and most deliberate voice, “aside from this. Don’t bother looking for Levitan. They’re long gone. I have no idea where they’re at, but I know they’re not gonna be anywhere near here.”

“Oh?” asked Dr. Roche. “You seem rather…  _ close  _ with it. Are you certain it won’t-”

“I-I’m not about to be a piece of cheese in your fucking mousetrap!” he said, unable to keep his voice from cracking. He staggered forwards, trying to wrench his arms apart. “Levitan’s not gonna come after me! You better stay the  _ fuck  _ away from them! I’ve seen what they can do, they will tear your army to  _ shreds  _ with their  _ bare hands! _ ”

Dr. Roche was quiet for a minute as if contemplating this. The only sounds in the room were Akio’s heavy breathing, and the tapping of the assistant’s keyboard.

“Very well,” said Dr. Roche, getting to his feet. He kept his hands in his pockets while he walked around the desk. “The whereabouts of Subject Seventeen isn’t the only information we can get out of you.”

Akio knew exactly what he was talking about. The blood that had been extracted from him had been the third pint in as many days, and he knew it wasn’t going to a blood bank. He knew it would be poked at, injected into mice, examined under a microscope… all for “the good of mankind”.

“You are exceptionally fascinating, Two-One-Oh-Three,” said Dr. Roche. “I’m very curious about how you, an unregistered Subject, allegedly ended up in  _ Japan  _ of all places. We intend to find out the limits of your abilities and see if you are like Subject Seventeen in any  _ other  _ ways.”

Akio swallowed. His mouth was parched.

Dr. Roche stood before him, toe to toe. “I’m sure that there’s more information about Subject Seventeen in you, Two-One-Oh-Three. You’re simply holding out on us.”

“I’m not gonna tell you anything,” he said through gritted teeth. He wanted to pull back, Dr. Roche was invading his personal space, but he stood his ground. “Do what you want to me. I don’t care.”

“You’re really willing to throw away your own comfort and accept the punishment, rather than betray Subject Seventeen?” asked Dr. Roche curiously. “You’ve known it for less than two weeks. The video camera footage appears to indicate that it kidnapped you during its escape. How is it that you’ve become so attached to it? Stockholm syndrome?”

Akio huffed out a laugh. “I have no fucking clue. I ask myself that question every goddamn day.”

“Is it that so called “code” I’ve heard about?” he asked. He was close enough that Akio could smell the onions on his breath. “That “ _ mutants stick together _ ” or something of the like? Have you already become absorbed into the “culture”?”

He was starting to get dangerously close to the answer. Akio refused to let the doctor wheedle any more information out of him. “It’s got nothing to do with the code. Take me back to my cell. I’m done, here.”

“I’m not,” said Dr. Roche. His gaze bored deeply into Akio’s eyes, and he couldn’t pull away. “How is it that you’ve become  _ so  _ attached to Subject Seventeen?”

Akio was trembling. He set his jaw. “Wouldn’t  _ you  _ like to know?” His face felt hot, and he knew it showed. He missed Levitan so much it hurt, but there was nothing he could do about it. He was on his own.

There was a brief moment of silence. Akio looked down, avoiding Dr. Roche’s eyes. When he looked up, he saw a look of triumph and understanding on his features. That look made his gut twist.

“ _ Oh.  _ I see.” Dr. Roche made a face. “There’s no place for  _ love  _ at this institution.”

“I never said there was,” he growled. “I want to go back to my cell.”

Dr. Roche stayed for another moment. “Love isn’t going to help you, Two-One-Oh-Three. Not here. Love is inherently subjective, and there’s no room for subjectivity at Monsoon institute.”

“I know,” said Akio, still pulling against his restraints. “I haven’t looked back since I left. Are we  _ done  _ here?”

Dr. Roche finally stepped way. “For the moment.” He nodded to his assistant, who stopped his typing to enter a code on the laptop that would summon the guards. “Get some rest, tonight. The more  _ rigorous  _ experimentation will begin in the morning.”

“Like what?” he snapped.

“Have you ever parted with a limb?” asked Dr. Roche.

He hadn’t. Akio didn’t want to know what that would be like, but he had a feeling he was about to find out.

“I’m sure that the scientist that still exists in you will find these experiments fascinating.” Dr. Roche put on a smirk, clearly intent on antagonizing Akio for being stubborn. “Shame that Subject Seventeen isn’t here to join you. It would be interesting to compare the results between you two. A competition, perhaps! Which of the two lovers can grow an arm back the fastest?”

Akio’s stomach twisted when he said that. The rage that had been boiling under the surface during this meeting finally bubbled over.

“ _ Go… to… HELL! _ ” He clenched his fists and wrenched his arms apart again.

Strangely, miraculously, with the loudest snap he’d ever heard in his life that sent tiny flakes of metal and plastic flying into the far corners of the room, he managed to break the ties.

Akio was so stupefied by this action that he just stared at his hands, dumbfounded, barely aware that Dr. Roche was yelling into his radio.

As soon as he heard the guards coming, he threw himself across the room at the doctor. His fist landed true, and he uppercut his jaw. Blood splattered from his busted lip, but Akio wasn’t done. He grabbed the front of his lab coat and yanked him forward, smashing the doctor’s nose against his forehead. His body was operating on autopilot, he instinctively jabbed his knee up and caught Dr. Roche in the groin.

Before he could get in another blow, large hands grabbed onto his body and pulled him away from the doctor. Akio writhed and kicked against his captors, lashing out with hands and feet. As he was dragged from the room, he saw that Dr. Roche was leaning on the table for support, blood spilling out over his hand and staining his white lab coat a spotty, splattered red.

Despite that, he smiled. “Seems like there’s more of Seventeen in you than we thought. I’ll see you in the morning, Two-One-Oh-Three.”

“ _ THERE’S MORE WHERE THAT CAME FROM, YOU BASTARD! _ ” he roared as he was dragged away, past the rows upon rows of cell doors, each containing a Subject just like him and not at all like him at the same time. “ _ DO YOUR WORST! I’M NOT AFRAID OF YOU! _ ”

That was a lie. He was terrified. He wasn’t about to stop, now. His struggles became more feeble, it was all he could do to keep screaming.

“ _ IF YOU COME NEAR ME AGAIN, I’LL FINISH WHAT I STARTED! NEXT TIME, I’M GOING FOR YOUR EYES! GO AHEAD AND HIDE BEHIND THESE GUARDS, I’LL BE WAITING! _ ”

He was thrown into the cell, bits of his handcuffs still around his wrists, and the door was slammed shut behind him. He scrambled to his feet and peered out through the window at the receding backs of the guards who had brought him there.

Akio swallowed and sat shakily on his cot. He could hear the yells of the other Subjects in the facility. Some were in anger, some were in fear. In the cell next to his, he could faintly hear sobbing.

It took every ounce of effort to catch his breath. He rested his head in his hands, eyes closed, and took long, slow breaths. He was cold. He wanted to bundle up in his blankets and hide, but he couldn’t do that. It would seem too much like giving in.

He missed Levitan. He missed Lev, and Ryan, and the others, and the open road, and the inside jokes. He missed the fresh air, daylight, and coffee. He missed Levitan and their broad shoulders, broad smile, big hands, and silver eyes. He missed their energy, their tenderness, and the kisses he knew he’d never get to have, now.

How had his life changed so much in less than two weeks?

He was in Monsoon facility, and there was no way out… not on his own.

 


	2. Peanuts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The mutants settle into their new base. Levitan leaves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: substance abuse

Levitan was driving. It had been the third day on the road without stopping. Their short blonde hair was greasy, they had deep bags under their silver eyes, and the scar across the bridge of their nose itched.

They missed their leather jacket. It sat in the trunk of the car, punched full of bullet holes and stained with blood. Instead, they were wearing a flimsy hoodie made from a material that they hated. It didn’t have the right texture, and the sensation of it on their skin irritated them to no end.

James sat in the front seat next to them. His shirt was unbuttoned, and a few of the multiple eyes that covered his chest and shoulders were showing, but they were all closed. His head rested on the seat, and he snored quietly.

Dana, Tanner, and Ryan sat in the back seat of the car. Dana and Tanner slept, his head on her shoulder. Dana’s scales shone softly in the afternoon light that entered the car, and Tanner’s slightly slick skin glimmered similarly. 

Levitan adjusted the rearview mirror to look at their son. Ryan stared out the window, lost in thought, his Gameboy in his lap. His dark hair was getting long enough to tie back, which Dana had done for him earlier that day. He still hadn’t outgrown his freckles.

Cars passed by them on the highway. Levitan adjusted the mirror again. They wanted to say something to him, they knew that the last few days hadn’t been… the best. Not at all.

Their journey was almost over. They lazily spun the wheel of the car and drove off the main highway, onto a bumpy dirt road that was covered in snow. It kicked up behind the tires of the car, splattering the front bumper of the brown van that stuck close behind them.

When the car began to shake and rattle, James, Dana, and Tanner woke up.

“Where are we?” asked Dana, rubbing her golden eyes with her clawed hands.

Tanner clicked his tongue to ask the same question. His eyes were huge and round, like a gecko’s.

James yawned, a hand over his mouth, and stretched his shoulders. The eyes on his chest blinked blearily and swiveled to take in the new surroundings. Each of them was a slightly different colour. 

“Maryland?” he asked.

Levitan gave a single nod. They hadn’t spoken much in the last few days, aside from snapping at people. It had to end, they hated how the others tiptoed around them.

The car bumped along the rough back road, ploughing through the snow.

Ryan was still staring out the window. “How much farther?”

“Not far,” said James, even though everybody knew that the question was directed at Levitan. “Half a mile at most, if my memory is correct.”

Lev was incredibly relieved that James was there to pick up their slack, that he knew how they were when they were like this. He’d taken over leading the group when they’d been too angry or spaced-out to think straight. They hadn’t had a solid night’s sleep in days, they’d snapped at everyone who’d talked to them, and when they weren’t angry they just felt… numb. 

All because they’d fucked up, and Akio had paid the price.

The car pulled into the old, overgrown driveway. Ancient, rusted farm machinery sat nearby, including a tractor and a combine. Behind the machinery, there was a large barn. The roof was tin, the paint was peeling from the walls, and snow piled up high on all sides.

Levitan shut the car off, opened the door, slammed it shut with a little more force than necessary, and started to walk towards the barn. They didn’t look back as the van pulled up and their companions hopped out of it. Their voices floated across the quiet snowy field.

The barn had a massive padlock, practically rusted in place, just how they left it all those years ago. They looked around for a rock or something to break it open with. The key had been lost at least half a decade ago.

They found an old lead pipe. They yanked it up from where it was frozen on the ground, then brought it down onto the lock. The old rusted parts didn’t stand a chance, they snapped off and the chain fell to the ground. Levitan pushed the doors open.

The doors opened up to another door, which was much smaller. The barn had been gutted of all machinery and farm equipment long ago, and instead had been outfitted to be a functioning two story house. The underground portion was for storage and was much more expansive, but as a general rule mutants don’t enjoy being underground.

“Quite the place,” said Naomi, putting up the air of being casual. Her red hair hung loose by her shoulders, slightly curled on the ends. Falling snowflakes clung to her false eyelashes. Her four hands each held a bag. “Think the power still works?”

“It should,” said Levitan. They opened the second door, which led to the front hall. They coughed when a cloud of dust was kicked up by the door opening.

“It’s filthy in here,” said Dana. “How long has it been since anybody’s lived here?”

“About ten years,” said Levitan.

“I think I remember this place,” said Ryan. “Did we ever live here?”

“We did,” they said simply. They opened the door into the kitchen.

A long table that could seat at least a dozen people sat in the middle of the room. The kitchen had one of those locking handles on it. The counters were made out of two different kinds of laminate that met awkwardly in the middle. The floor was wooden and splintered.

“Settle in,” said Levitan. They knocked the snow from their boots and kicked them off. “Don’t track the snow in. It’s too cold for wet socks. I need somebody to help me get the generator running.”

“On it,” said Naomi.

“Great.” Levitan kept trying to take up the leadership role that was expected of them, but what they really wanted to do with get smashed and lie face down on the carpet for awhile. In fact, that's usually what they wanted to be doing, lately. “James, Hawke, you two help the newbies settle in.”

James gave a thumbs up. Hawke imitated the gesture with his mechanical hand that clicked and whirred when the machine parts moved together. His good eye was furrowed deeply as if he was thinking hard, his mechanical eye was impassive.

Levitan turned to the other three she had in her command. “Ryan, Dana, Tanner, you start cleaning. We gotta get the dust outta here.”

Dana nodded and Tanner clicked in assent. Ryan huffed a dramatic sigh, refusing to look at Levitan.

“It’s down in the basement,” said Levitan to Naomi. “C’mon.”

They still remembered the layout of this place fairly well. Dust kicked up from their feet when they walked through the kitchen, around the corner, and down the flight of steps to the basement.

“Hey,” said Naomi, following along behind with their toolbox in one hand and a flashlight in the other. “Everything okay?”

“No,” they said sharply. The door was wedged shut, they checked it open with their hip and sent it flying into the wall. “Why?”

“You’re scaring the kids,” said Naomi. “The newbies need to know what you’re like when you’re not being a huge dick.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” they said mockingly. “Is  _ my  _ mood because  _ Akio  _ was taken affecting  _ you? _ Well, let me just pull myself up by the bootstraps and-”

“Knock it off,” said Naomi, exasperated. “We’re worried about you, Lev. There’s nothing we can do. He’s gone.”

“ _ That’s what you think _ ,” they mumbled under their breath as they entered the room with the generator and the woodstove. “Let’s get this thing up and running.”

“I see you staring at his glasses,” said Naomi. She handed the flashlight to Levitan, popped open the side of the generator and inspected it. “James and I were talking about it. You have to take your mind off of what happened in LA. It’s not good for you.”

“I know what’s good for me,” they snapped. “I ain’t some kinda  _ idiot. _ ”

“Never said you were,” said Naomi, tightening a few bolts here and there. She grabbed some fuel from the shelf and filled up the compartment. “We have to concentrate on keeping everybody safe. We need you, right now.”

Levitan sighed and hung their head. Shame and guilt reared their ugly heads inside their aching chest. “I know, I know. I wanna get my act together, just… Fuck, it’s my fault!” They kicked the wall, spraining their toe, but they didn’t care. It would be healed again in less than a few minutes. “It’s my fault he got captured! If I’d hidden the body, if I was more careful, if they hadn’t figured it out…”

“Lev, you can’t blame yourself,” said Naomi. She bolted the side back onto the generator and pulled the string to start it up. It coughed and died. “Goddamn.”

“I can blame myself if I want to,” they said tersely. “You can’t stop me.”

“I can’t, but I’m not gonna condone it.” Naomi tried again. This time, the machine sputtered to life. The lightbulb overhead flickered and turned on. “Sweet. Onto the heat.”

Levitan shifted their feet. “I want him back.”

“I’m sure you do,” said Naomi sympathetically. Something caught in her voice, and Levitan zeroed in on what it was in an instant.

“You think he deserves it,” they accused.

“What? No!” Naomi shook her head hastily. Two of her hands were held up in a gesture of peace, the other two held screwdrivers. “Nobody deserves that!”

“You think he does,” they said again. Their breath clouded before them in the chilly basement. “You think he does because he used to work for  _ them. _ ”

“I-I don’t! Really!” she said, but Levitan noticed her hesitation.

“Akio’s a good man,” they growled. “In the time I’ve known him, he’s changed so much. If it wasn’t for him, we could’a been caught, too. He could’a turned on us, say we kidnapped him, but he was with us until the end. How  _ dare  _ you think he deserves what he got?”

“I didn’t-”

Levitan’s fury was boiling too close to the surface. “Akio’s  _ changed.  _ He’s got more heart and more love to give than most folks ‘round here. He was loyal to us to the very end, even though that wasn’t his intention. I dunno what he sees in us, maybe a family or somethin’, I dunno, but he protected us. We are  _ not  _ gonna disrespect him and say that he deserved what he got!  _ Are we clear? _ ”

Naomi closed her eyes and took a breath. When she opened them, she said, “I’m sorry. You’re right. He’s a good man. We’re gonna miss him.” She turned to the woodstove. “I miss Olivia more.”

Levitan winced. Olivia was gone, and she’d taken two dozen armed Monsoon guards with her. Levitan was the only person who’d ever touched her. If anybody else had tried, they would have been killed by her radiation.

“I’m sorry,” said Levitan. Olivia’s death was also on their hands. If they hadn’t gone to LA in the first place, she would still be alive.

How could all these people look up to them when they’ve made so many horrible, costly mistakes?

“We’ve all lost someone,” said Naomi as she loaded some tinder into the woodstove. “We have to move on.” She took a lighter, lit a piece of paper from her notepad, and positioned it under the twigs.

Akio wasn’t dead. He was captured. That was entirely different.

Levitan watched in silence as Naomi coaxed the flames with her capable hands. The smell of woodsmoke began to fill the house, tapping into old memories of sitting around campfires or the kitchen table that was upstairs. Happier times.

They could hear laughter upstairs as the kids chased each other, then a shout as one of the twins manipulated something metal. Judging by the following yell, Levitan would guess that Daniel had made Hawke’s arm stick to the fridge. Again.

Levitan sighed and stuck their hands into the pockets of their hoodie.

 

It was nighttime. Levitan was pulling on an extra jacket over their hoodie. It was cold out.

The barn had warmed up considerably. Ryan, Dana, Tanner, Daniel and his twin Dylan all sat huddled like puppies around the chimney in a mess of blankets and pillows. Judging by the soft snores and whimpers, they were all sound asleep.

“You’re up late.”

Levitan jumped and whirled, fists at the ready. James stood in the kitchen, his sightless eyes staring blankly forward while the eyes on his chest and shoulders stared unblinkingly at Levitan.

“Yeah,” said Levitan.

“You going out?” he asked when he saw their jacket.

“Gonna chop more wood,” they said, subtly hiding their shoulderbag behind them. “We’re almost out.”

James’s eyes flicked to the strap of the bag on their shoulder, then back to Levitan’s impassive expression. “Are we?”

“Yep.”

“Hm.” He yawned and clapped them on the shoulder as he walked by. “Stay safe, whatever you’re doing.”

“Yeah, yeah,” they said gruffly, glad that he didn’t press them for more. They walked to the front hall and shut the door behind them. They slipped their feet into their combat boots and laced them up, fingers working the laces so tightly they were afraid of breaking them.

They shut the door behind them and walked outside. The moon glistened on the snow. White flakes fell from the sky. They pulled the hood up over their head.

The car keys jangled when Levitan fished them from their pocket. They climbed into the boxy blue car and started the engine. It rattled to life, they shifted gears and turned their head to watch behind them as they turned around.

The headlights did a shit job of showing the snowy dirt road before them. The wipers worked against the snow that was coming down.

Levitan turned on the radio. It was a jazz channel, currently featuring a saxophone solo.

Akio played the saxophone. They’d never gotten to hear him play it.

They punched the radio before they had to endure another note. It sparked under their fist and quieted down.

With a breath of relief, Levitan rested their bloodied hand on the steering wheel as they drove north. Slowly, over the course of a few minutes, the skin healed on their hand. Good as new.

 

Levitan was back in New York. It was one in the morning. They’d liked the city before, but now the sight of the lights made them sick to their stomach. Last time they’d been here, they’d been driving away as fast as possible, Ryan behind the wheel, Akio unconscious in the back. That was back before they were friends, before everything else happened.

Akio was less than ten miles away from where they were. Everything in Levitan wanted to drive that car straight through the front doors of Monsoon and get him back, but that wouldn’t help them in the least. They would get captured too, and what good would that do anybody?

So, because they were finally alone in a big city, they decided to go get smashed.

The bar was cheap and tacky. The neon sign outside said “ _ Charlie’s Place _ ”. The guy behind the bar wasn’t Charlie, but he could serve up a shot in record time, which was good for Levitan because they were knocking them back, double fisted.

“Easy there, pal,” said the guy behind the bar as they slammed back their eighth shot. His name was Doug. “Rough day?”

“Rough  _ life, _ ” they said bitterly.

“Jeez. Somethin’ happen?”

“You could say that.” Their head was swimming and it felt… not bad. Not good enough. They swallowed another shot and slammed the tiny glass down onto the bar with too much force. It shattered under their hand, slicing open their palm.

“Fuck,” they said, not feeling the pain. The alcohol had numbed them sufficiently. “Got a tissue?”

“Jesus Christ,” said Doug, handing them a napkin. He swept up the glass shards. “You’re gonna kill yourself.”

“I know my limits,  _ pal, _ ” they slurred, mopping the blood from their hand. “I’m gonna sober up in less than an hour anyways. It… it don’t… i-it takes me… fuck, I need more alcohol.”

“I’m gonna cut you off,” said Doug. “I’m amazed you ain’t pukin’ your guts out, right now.”

“ _ Bullshit! _ ” snapped Levitan. “One more shot, man. C’mon!”

“... I’ll give you a beer and a bowl of peanuts. Okay?”

“Fine, fine.” Levitan pulled out their wallet and fumbled for a moment for their last ten dollar bill. “Thanks, man. Y-you’re a real trooper. Guys like you? Y-y’all are the  _ real  _ heroes in this world, not fuck-ups who fuck up, ditch their friends and family, get smashed, only to fuck up again.”

“Don’t mention it,” said Doug as he filled up the beer glass. “You need me to be your midnight therapist?”

“You don’t even  _ wanna  _ hear ‘bout my problems,” slurred Levitan, waving their hand dramatically. “I-I once pulled a guy’s eye out with my  _ bare hands. _ Did I say once? I-I meant a few times.”

“You’re a god among men, my friend,” said Doug solemnly as he pushed the beer over to them. “I can only hope to live up to your legacy.” He dropped a bowl of peanuts in front of them, took the bill, ran it through the register, and gave them their change. “Here.”

Levitan gave him a thumbs up and didn’t say another word.

A guy hopped up onto a barstool next to them. Levitan didn’t look at him at first. They soon realized that getting drunk was a terrible idea, considering they now had no money left and the fuzzy feeling wasn’t gonna last all that long. In fact, they miraculously felt  _ more  _ depressed than they had before entering the bar. Incredible. An outstanding feat of bad decision-making.

They popped a few peanuts into their mouth and glanced over at the guy next to them. He was wearing a white and blue polo shirt, his jacket draped over his seat. His hair was messy, and his shoulders were slouched.

He turned a little. Levitan saw the logo on his shirt. It was a tiny blue M in a half circle.

The peanuts in their hand were crushed to dust. A Monsoon employee was sitting  _ right next to them. _ Lady luck was on their side, tonight.

The guy ordered a beer and a sandwich, picked the wallet out of his back pocket, paid for the food and drink, then replaced it.

Levitan was drunk, but they were sober enough to still have some wits about them. They hauled themselves up from their seat and stumbled right into the guy.

“Fuck, man, ‘m sorry,” they slurred, getting back to their feet.

“No problem, dude,” said the guy. He had a gap in his teeth when he offered a sympathetic smile.

Levitan staggered off towards the bathroom, regaining their footing a bit better as they walked further away. The bar had one unisex stall. They locked themself inside and leaned against the door. They had his wallet in their hand.

“Sucker,” they mumbled, opening it and pocketing the forty bucks that was in there. They checked through the wallet to see if there was anything useful they could use. A keycard would be  _ ideal. _

His driver’s licence was in the clear pocket. The guy had bugged his eyes out exaggeratedly, like he was trying to be funny. It read “ _ Mitch Carmichael _ ” above his age, weight, height, and address.

Mitch Carmichael? Where had they heard that name, before? They scratched the back of their head as they puzzled over it for a moment. Mitch Carmichael…

Their jaw dropped.  _ This  _ was the guy that Akio had called in LA. He knew Akio. Maybe he would know where he was.

His address was 2259-12 West 43rd Avenue. Levitan furrowed their brow, concentrating as much as their drunk self would allow, and committed the address to memory.

This guy could be useful.

Levitan left the bathroom and went back to the bar to finish their beer. They managed to walk in a fairly straight line, not that they  _ wanted  _ to be sober or anything, and went back to their seat.

“Thanks for everything, Doug,” they said, holding their beer aloft. “You are a gentleman and a scholar.”

“Just doin’ my part,” said Doug, shrugging his shoulders. “Come back anytime, buddy.”

“You got it.” Levitan looked over at Mitch. He’d drained half a glass of beer and was contemplating the crust on his turkey sandwich.

They decided to be cheeky. Call it bad judgment or a bad sense of humour, but something made them clear their throat pointedly.

“Hey,” they said, holding out his wallet. “You left this in the bathroom.”

Mitch looked over at them, confused. They took the wallet from them.  “What? But I didn’t-”

His gaze traveled from Levitan’s hand to their face. Levitan relished the expression of pure shock and terror that crossed his features when they saw who they were. Everybody at Monsoon knew who they were. Their face was plastered on at least one wall in every room. They were, after all, a prize and exemplary subject.

Well, except for the “slaughtering anybody who comes near them” part.

He seemed petrified. He didn’t move, aside from his mouth flopping open like a fish on a boat deck.

Before he could say a word, Levitan slammed back the rest of their beer, shoved a handful of peanuts into their pocket, and left the bar. They walked out into the cold night. Forty-third avenue wasn’t too far from there. They could walk it in about ten minutes.

 

Levitan found the apartment building fairly easily. It was old and rickety, and the front door didn’t even have a buzzer. The stairs creaked underfoot as they walked down the steps. Mitch’s apartment was in the basement. The floor was damp down here.

There was no hidden key nearby, but Levitan didn’t need it. They slammed their side against the door. It slammed open and crashed into the wall.

“ _ Shut the fuck up! _ ” shouted a voice from upstairs. There was the sound of another slammed door.

Levitan closed the door behind them. It didn’t fit in place properly. Splinters of wood from the bolt now covered the carpet by the door. 

The apartment was tiny and packed full of strange stuff. There were all these psychedelic posters on the walls in swirling colours, pasted right next to blueprints of the Star Wars spaceships and mathematical formulas from work thumbtacked right beside them. There were a good sized TV and a few gaming systems nearby. A dead plant sat in the corner next to a seemingly empty snake cage.

Levitan plopped themself down onto the loveseat by the TV and flicked it on with the remote. They kicked their feet up onto the coffee table covered in Sci Fi magazines, popped a peanut in their mouth, and waited. Their gun sat on the couch next to them.

They began to wait.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yoooo thanks for reading my original work! Comments will make me go HELL YEAH


	3. The Experiment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akio is experimented on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> BIG FAT WARNING RIGHT HERE FOR TORTURE. This is a truly horrifying chapter, I'm a little bit disgusted with myself for writing this. There's gore, torture, body horror, and BAD, BAD SCIENCE here. If you don't wanna read this chapter, I'll summarize at the bottom. Also a throwaway line that could be construed as suicide ideation.
> 
> Altogether: devil chapter. Be warned.

Akio’s hair was damp from his shower. He sat on his cot with a sketchpad in his lap, doodling whatever shapes came to mind. He’d lost his pen and pencil privileges after stabbing Dr. Duncan in the face. He held a felt tip marker in his hand.

He could draw okay, but he wasn’t an incredible artist. He mostly specialized in anatomical diagrams, but he didn’t really want to be reminded of things like that. He ended up doodling his own name in different styles, both in English and in Japanese. Bubble letters, cursive writing, curlicues, spiky letters, swooping Japanese characters.

_ Akio Sato _

_ Akio Sato _

_ Akio Sato _

_ Akio Reeves _

He stared at that last one for a solid minute before scribbling it out. What the fuck, brain? He hated the awful feeling he got in his gut when he looked at Levitan’s last name.

His head snapped up when he heard footsteps. He looked around for something to defend himself with, but before he could come up with anything, the door swung open.

“Subject Two-One-Oh-Three,” said the guard, who was holding a taser in his hand. “It is time for your appointment.”

“ _ Fuck you, _ ” Akio snarled. He jumped to his feet and grabbed his chair, holding it by the back so he could ward the guard off with the legs.

“Subject Two-One-Oh-Three, this is your final warning,” said the guard, his voice emotionless, face expressionless behind the plastic shield.

Akio threw the chair at the guard. It struck him and he stumbled backwards. He fired the taser at Akio.

The probes caught Akio in the chest. Electricity coursed through him. He yelled and collapsed to the floor. His limbs twitched and spasmed without his permission.

He was dimly aware of being lifted by his armpits and dragged away. He feebly tried to kick and squirm, but it was all he could do to keep breathing.

Next thing he knew, there was a door closing behind him. He was flat on his back on a steel table. His head was still spinning and the world seemed to tilt and swirl around him.

Panic jumped into his throat when he realized that his wrists were being locked in place. He tried to squirm against them. His ankles were locked down, too. Another strap was wrapped around his abdomen. Another around his throat. He was immobilized.

“Good afternoon, Two-One-Oh-Three,” said the doctor.

Akio turned his head and squinted up. It was Dr. Duncan. He had a nasty bruise on his cheek.

He couldn’t help smiling at that. He tried to form a snippy comment, but his tongue refused to work.

“Enough of that.” The doctor took out a tissue and wiped the saliva from his mouth. Oh god, had he been drooling?

Akio turned his head and took in his surroundings now that the world had begun to steady itself. He saw an enormous cabinet, and a steel tray laid out with medical tools. He saw the needles and the scalpels and the petri dishes. He saw the machines that would monitor his pulse and his brain activity.

Then he noticed the saw.

It sat in on its own tray. Its teeth were small and sharp. Akio remembered using such a saw himself, back in university. He remembered using it on a cadaver to slice through the bone in order to study anatomy. 

Oh.

Oh god.

“Alright, Subject Two-One-Oh-Three,” said Dr. Duncan as he readied a needle to draw blood with. “For the sake of clarity and so you won’t ask us any questions, I intend to explain to you what we are going to do today.”

Akio was paralyzed with fear. He let out a small gasp when the needle pushed into his skin, and winced as it drew the blood sample.

“We will take several samples,” said Dr. Duncan. “Blood, hair, saliva. Then, we will sever your right arm, just below the shoulder here.” He touched Akio’s upper arm, and he jerked away quickly.

“ _ Don’t touch me! _ ” he said shrilly, the strap around his throat pressing uncomfortably against his trachea.

Dr. Duncan didn’t reply. “We have already seen the incredible healing that your body possesses. During your initial examination, we couldn’t find any evidence of the bullets that had struck you during your capture. Fascinating.”

Akio was trembling. His eyes watered. His glasses pressed uncomfortably against his nose.

“Once we sever your right arm, we will wait and observe the results before severing your left in a similar matter. We will observe both the removed parts, and the wounds, and we will compare results. Then, if you are still coherent, we intend to interview you about the process. Understood?”

“Y-y-you’re insane!” cried Akio. “Jesus Christ, hand me a gun and I’ll blow my own brains out for you! Don’t do this!”

Dr. Duncan didn’t reply. He adjusted his rubber gloves, picked up a swab, and said, “Open your mouth.”

Akio closed his mouth and looked away, closing his eyes tight shut. There was no way this was happening. It just wasn’t possible.

“Ross, help me open its mouth.”

Akio’s blood boiled at that, but even though he wanted to yell and scream, he kept his jaw locked. A pair of hands grabbed at his face hard enough to leave bruises. A thumb pressed under his jaw  _ hard,  _ and he was forced to open his mouth.

The swab was pushed past his lips. He bit down, snapping it off inside his mouth. When the hands were taken away, he opened his eyes, keeping his jaw locked.

“You’re not going to be able to swallow that,” said Dr. Duncan. “It  _ will  _ get stuck in your throat.”

Akio considered it. He  _ could  _ swallow it, theoretically. It’s not like it could kill him.

“If you swallow that,” said Dr. Duncan, “we will cut you open and retrieve it, understood?”

Akio’s eyes widened. He was torn. He’d sworn that he wouldn’t do anything they said, but… 

“ _ Open your mouth. _ ”

… He wanted to keep their knives as far away from him as possible. He slackened his jaw slightly.

The assistant’s fingers pushed roughly into his mouth and retrieved the swab, hand keeping his jaw open. He snapped his teeth down, but not quick enough. They clacked together painfully.

“There. Was that so hard?” asked Dr. Duncan. He took a pair of tweezers and plucked a few hairs from Akio’s head, right by the hairline.

“ _ Go to hell, _ ” he growled, his voice slightly hoarse.

Dr. Duncan didn’t respond. He rolled up Akio’s sleeve. The assistant unbuttoned his jumpsuit and attached electrodes to his chest, and two to his temples. He could hear the beeping of his heart rate on the machine, galloping at a mile a minute. He could see the EEG machine spitting out results and forming images showing his brain activity.

“Ross, hand me the saw.”

“Wait!” cried Akio, his voice cracked and panicked. “A-aren’t you going to give me anesthetic?”

“No,” said Dr. Duncan as he swabbed Akio’s upper arm with alcohol. Akio found that mildly laughable, why would he need to swab the area if he was just gonna fucking slice it off?

“Why?” he asked, hating how pitiful his voice sounded.

Dr. Duncan unclasped his arm from the restraint and held it firmly in place. “We need to see whether you feel pain, how you react to it, and what it does to your body.” Ross took his wrist and pinned it so he was unable to move. He pulled to keep the muscle taut.

The last of Akio’s pride went out the window as Dr. Duncan set the saw teeth against his arm. “ _ I FEEL PAIN! I DO! PLEASE GOD, PLEASE DON’T DO- _ ”

Akio’s pleas were cut off by his own scream as the saw sliced through his skin. He couldn’t stop screaming as the tool cut efficiently through his muscle tissue. Tears rolled down his cheeks, he tried to thrash against his bonds but he couldn’t move an inch. When the saw hit bone, he wailed.

Oh god, oh god, oh god it hurt! He sobbed and screamed, unable to think about anything except the pain, the pain, the pain that radiated up his arm, his shoulder, and washed through his entire body. The heart monitor was going wild, the EEG machine spun out patterns and images of his brain. He couldn’t breathe.

There was a snap, and he screeched.

There was the sickening sound of tendons being sliced away.

Akio’s eyes were tight shut. He faintly heard Dr. Duncan and his assistant talking. He heard the soft thump of something heavy and slightly wet hitting a metal surface.

Knowing that he might live to regret this, he opened his eyes.

He saw his arm. It wasn’t attached to his body. It was sitting on a silver tray, right beside him. Before he could formulate any words, Dr. Duncan blocked his view. He staunched the blood flow from Akio’s arm.

“Ross, take notes on the process,” he said, not looking at Akio’s tear-streaked face.

“Sure, boss,” said the assistant. He scribbled some things down in his notebook, then took a camera and photographed the severed arm, then the wound.

Akio’s breathing was shallow. His stump of an arm throbbed in pain. Slowly, achingly slowly, over the course of ten minutes that felt like a thousand years, the pain began to ebb.

“Ross, look at this.”

The two scientists crouched over Akio’s arm. Akio couldn’t see what was happening, but he could feel the heat. He felt feverish.

“It’s sweating,” said Ross, scribbling in his notepad. “Seems to have come down with a fever.”

“The arm is beginning to reform,” said Dr. Duncan. “Look, the bone is starting to elongate. Ross, do me a favour and remove the other arm. I intend to keep observing this.”

“Sure thing, boss.”

“ _ No! _ ” Akio found his voice at last, choked and harsh. “ _ Please, please no! I-I can’t take it, don’t touch me! _ ”

He received no acknowledgement that he had spoken. Akio sobbed as Ross cleaned the blood from the saw with antiseptic wipes, walked over to his other side, rolled up his sleeve, and set the blade against his skin.

The pain was unbearable. He couldn’t find the voice to scream at first as the blade sliced cleanly through his skin and flesh. When the saw teeth hit bone, he let out an ear piercing scream that made the tools in the silver tray rattle. 

He was crying, he was screaming, he was crying. He couldn’t move. This was a horrible dream. He was gonna wake up and he’d be back in his apartment, before all of this had ever happened.

Better, he was gonna wake up and he’d be back in LA, curled up next to Levitan.

Akio screamed as the bone snapped. He screamed as the blade continued to slice through his muscle and skin. He screamed as his other arm was ripped away from him.

The pain was  _ agonizing _ . He thought he was going to pass out and save him from more torment, but no. He wasn’t that lucky.

He clung to consciousness. He couldn’t process what was happening, he could only stare at the bright white light that was positioned on the ceiling. Spots formed in his vision.

“The arm is half formed,” he heard Dr. Duncan say.

How much time had passed? Akio had no idea. He was sweating and he felt chilled at the same time. His shoulders, where his arms had been, were painfully hot. The entire area was sore to the touch, even the slight pressure of his shirt was too painful to bear. The sharp pain faded to a dull ache. The tears dried in his eyes.

He looked down at his right arm and cringed in disgust. The bone had elongated and had begun to reform, but there was no  _ skin  _ on it, yet. The muscle tissue was beginning to build and swell. Slowly, as he watched, the bone in his forearm extended and became his wrist, which became his hand, which ended with his fingertips. His arm looked like some horrifying half-complete anatomy demonstration for high school biology students.

“Fascinating,” said Dr. Duncan as his assistant rapidly took notes.

“I’ve never seen anything like this,” said Ross, quickly turning a page in his notebook.

Dr. Duncan took a photograph of Akio’s arm. “Subject Seventeen has similar abilities, but it’s far more difficult to wrangle  _ it  _ onto a table. It took ten guards in full riot gear to subdue it on its last rampage.” He was speaking as if Akio wasn’t even present.

“Did you hear anything about what happened to Monsoon LA?” asked Ross.

“Just that it’s where  _ this  _ got picked up,” said Dr. Duncan, indicating Akio on the steel table.

Akio wanted to make a remark like, “ _ I’m a mutant not an idiot, I can fucking hear you _ ”, but it came out sounding more like a pained whine.

“Well,” said Ross, “Seventeen went on a rampage. A  _ real  _ rampage.”

“I’m not surprised. They tend to do that.”

“No, this was  _ next level _ . It killed thirty of our men.”

“ _ Thirty?! _ ”

“You heard me.  _ Thirty. _ Not mercifully, either. You remember Jacob Thurst?”

“Sorta, yeah?”

“Seventeen  _ ripped his throat out _ ,” said Ross in an undertone. “With their  _ bare hands _ . They’re a monster.”

“We can’t use terms like that to describe the Subjects,” said Dr. Duncan, fighting to keep his tone neutral. “They are the Subjects, and that is that. We can’t use subjective terms to describe them.”

“Still,” said Ross.

Akio finally found his voice again. “Levitan’s my friend. I-if I ever see them again, I-I’m gonna tell ‘em who you are and what you did to me.”

Dr. Duncan didn’t respond to this. He tapped his pen against his lip as he observed Akio’s skin reforming. “Ross, photograph the other arm. We’ll need to compare the results, later.”

“Got it, boss.” He took up the camera and photographed Akio’s other still-forming arm.

There was blood all over the operating table.

Akio felt like he was going to throw up, but he hadn’t eaten in about a day so that wasn’t likely to happen. He kept his mouth tightly closed, he didn’t need blood  _ and  _ vomit on his jumpsuit.

“Almost completely reformed,” said Dr. Duncan.

Akio’s fingers twitched. The healed skin was beginning to creep down from his upper arm.

Dr. Duncan locked his wrist in place, again.

Akio was as angry as he was terrified. The emotions mixed and turned in his chest. He strained against the cuffs keeping him pinned to the steel table.

“I  _ will  _ see Levitan again,” he said, trying to sound more sure than he felt. “And when I do, I’m gonna tell them  _ every single detail  _ about what you did to me! We’re gonna come for you, and we’re gonna do to you what you did to me!”

“I see that you are fully coherent,” said Dr. Duncan, responding to Akio for the first time. He had a small list of questions ready. “You seem very agitated.”

“ _ OF COURSE I’M AGITATED! _ ” he said. His voice cracked and he sobbed, turning his face away to hide his shame.

He flexed his fingers. Everything was back to normal. His heart stuttered in his chest. He felt dizzy and weak.

“How would you describe this experience?” asked Dr. Duncan.

“ _ Traumatizing, _ ” he answered through gritted teeth. “I wanna cut  _ your  _ arms off!  _ Inch! By! Inch! _ ”

Ross took notes on his replies. 

“Would you say that you expected this result?” asked Dr. Duncan.

“Suck my dick.”

“I’m going to ask you again. Would you say that you  _ expected  _ this result?”

Akio turned his head and glared at him. “ _ Suck. My. Dick. _ ”

“This is the final time I will ask you this.  _ Would you say that you expected this result? _ ”

Akio tasted bile in his mouth. He spat.

His aim was fairly true. He managed to strike Dr. Duncan in the centre of the chest. A few flecks of spittle hit his chin.

“Suck my dick,” he repeated in a growl. “Eat my ass. If you  _ ever  _ find me outta cuffs near you, I’m gonna strangle the life outta you.”

Dr. Duncan let out a breath. “I think we have all the answers we need for now.” He picked up a tissue and wiped his chin and his chest. “Call the guards to take him back to his cell. Judging by the blood loss, he will likely be too weak to walk.”

The assistant pressed a buzzer on the wall.

Akio remained pinned down to the bed until two guards came into the room. One pressed a gun to his temple, like it would make a difference, while the other unfastened his restraints. He weakly tried to struggle, but he couldn’t manage much more than flapping his arms uselessly. He was hauled to his feet and dragged down the hall, his toes skidding on the ground as he was practically carried.

With a firm push between his shoulder blades, he was shoved back into his cell. The door slammed shut behind him.

His breath was shaky. He collapsed where he was and backed up against the wall, his arms wrapping around his knees. He rested his forehead against his knees, fighting to keep breathing.

He breathed. In… Out… In… Out… 

Less than a minute later, a bundle of white cloth was pushed through the slot in the bottom of his door, the same slot meals were delivered through. It was a new uniform.

Akio hesitated for a minute before realizing how  _ gross  _ he felt. Wet blood and his cold sweat made the uniform cling to his shoulders. He hastily stripped out of the bloodied uniform, washed his shoulders in the sink, and pulled on the new one. It was identical to the ruined uniform, right down to the patch on the breast that said “2103” in simple blue numbers.

He held the bloodied uniform in his hands.

His  _ hands.  _ They were his hands, but they were strangely new. They didn’t feel right. His fingernails had only just begun to form, he barely had cuticles.

There was nobody to judge him except for the blinking security camera. He let out a sob. He pitched the old uniform aside and stumbled over to his cot. He pressed himself up into the corner, holding a pillow, and pulled his blanket around his shoulders. He buried his face in his pillow and cried. His shoulders trembled, he gasped for breath, he couldn’t contain his terror or pain.

Akio could still feel the saw blades on his arm. He could still hear the beeping of the heart monitor. He could still feel the blood pooling underneath him on the steel table.

He closed his eyes and tried to think of anything else. He tried to hum songs he remembered from when he was a teenager. He tried to think about simple, swirling patterns. He tried to concentrate on his breath.

He tried to think about Levitan. Levitan, Ryan, Naomi, Hawke, James, Dana, Tanner… the people he helped rescue… He was here, but they were safe. He was here, and they were free. He’d done a good thing, he’d managed to make one good choice in his stupid life when he told Levitan not to come for him. He’d done a good thing. 

He tried to think about Levitan.

Even that didn’t work.

He stained his pillow with his tears until he drifted off to sleep. When he did, he dreamed of bloodied sawblades and beeping heart monitors.

Akio didn’t sleep for more than an hour, that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you skimmed past this chapter, this is basically what happened:  
> \- Akio sat in his cell, doodling his name. Accidentally slapped Levitan's last name onto his.  
> \- He was taken into a room and experimented on. He was tied to a table. His arms were removed. Painfully. They grow back.  
> \- The scientists gossiped about Levitan. They referred to Akio as an "it" and ignored him when he begged for mercy.  
> \- Akio keeps fighting back, and he spits on Dr. Duncan because he deserves it.  
> \- He was returned to his cell and he cried himself to sleep.
> 
> If you read this and liked it, shoot me a kudos. Better yet, a comment! :D


	4. The Plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levitan bullies Mitch into helping them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: drug use, brief mentions of torture, Bad Science

Mitch dragged his feet as he walked down the sidewalk. His toes were numb in his loafers. He kept replaying that event in the bar over and over again in his mind. He couldn’t quite process what had happened.

Was that  _ really  _ Seventeen? What were they  _ doing  _ over here? How had they found him?

He shook his head. No, it couldn’t be. No way. He was fine. He was safe.

Mitch shuffled up the steps of his building, opened the door, and walked down the rickety steps to his apartment.

His heart stopped when he saw that the door was cracked open less than an inch.

Mitch tentatively tiptoed down the stairs, cringing when they creaked and squeaked under his shoes. He heard that the TV was on. He had no weapon, but his hand was on his phone. He slowly and carefully pushed the door open.

The lock had been forced in a way unlike anything he’d ever seen. It looked like the door had been kicked down. Splinters of wood were scattered across the threshold. 911 was dialled on his phone and his thumb hovered over the call button.

The TV was the only light source in the room. It flickered over the posters on his walls. His heart pounded in his chest. Was the person who broke in still in the apartment? Worse… was it who he thought it was?

There was a creak in the kitchen.

He silently crept towards the noise. His hands were shaking.

Suddenly, a hand flew out from behind him and clamped over his mouth. His phone was ripped from his hand and tossed away into the corner. The door slammed shut with a bang. The chain was drawn.

Mitch struggled and kicked, but the hands that held him were powerful. One covered his jaw, almost crushing it, and the other went around his neck in a headlock. He was forced to his knees.

The hand was removed from his mouth, but before he could cry out, a strip of duct tape covered his mouth, wrapping around the base of his neck. His arms were forced behind him and bound with tape.

He struggled weakly, feeling helpless. He was dragged over to the couch and shoved down onto it. This was when he finally got a look at his captor.

It was Subject Seventeen. He wasn’t all that surprised.

“Alright,  _ Mitch, _ ” said Seventeen. 

They had a Texan drawl, which wasn’t really how he pictured them sounding. They were wearing a hoodie and a grubby brown coat over it. Their hair was short and blonde. They had a scar across the bridge of their nose, and their eyes were silver, but it was hard to see with this light. He couldn’t really tell whether they were a man or a woman, but at that moment it didn’t really matter. He was positive that they were going to kill him.

“I’m not going to kill you,” they said.

Yeah, like he was gonna believe that. He tried to stand.

“Knock it off.” They put a boot on his knee to keep him in place. “I just wanna talk.”

He gave them a suspicious look and made a skeptical noise.

“Yeah, yeah,” they said, waving their hand. “I’ll have you know that I don’t  _ usually  _ go ‘round introducing myself to people like this. I just needed you to listen to me. Are you gonna listen?”

It wasn’t like he really had a choice. He gave a nod.

“Good.” They picked up the remote and muted the TV before taking a seat on the coffee table. They gazed at him intensely, never breaking eye contact.  “I wanna make it clear that this ain’t about me. It’s about Akio.”

Mitch’s eyes went wide. He tried to speak, but the tape stopped him from doing so.

“Shut up,” said Subject Seventeen, without any feeling behind it. “He’s been captured by  _ you  _ lot. I dunno if you’re high ‘nough up on the food chain to know ‘bout it, but it can’t be a surprise.”

Mitch had  _ not  _ known, actually. He’d been demoted down to desk jockey a short time ago, after Akio had called him from Los Angeles. The higher-ups hadn’t liked the amount of information he’d given away so freely. He shook his head in response.

“You didn’t know?” they asked, like they didn’t believe him. “Hmm. In any case, I know  _ exactly  _ what’s bein’ done to him in there, and I ain’t ‘bout to stand by and let it happen.”

Mitch couldn’t believe what was happening. He wriggled against his bonds.

“You must have questions,” said Subject Seventeen. “If you scream when I take that tape off, I’m gonna rip out your vocal chords. Clear?”

Mitch nodded hastily.

Subject Seventeen reached behind Mitch’s head, then ripped the tape off. He let out a cry of pain as some of the hair on the back of his neck came with it.

“Sorry,” they said, crumpling up the tape and tossing it aside. They didn’t sound all that sorry.

“H-how did he get captured?” asked Mitch. His lips felt raw and the back of his neck stung.

“That’s not important,” said Subject Seventeen. “He sacrificed himself for us, told us not to come back for him. He was… gone before I could do anything.” They looked away. Mitch could practically feel the guilt radiating from them.

“He’s a good man,” they continued, contemplating a spot on the carpet. “He’s a good friend. I promised him I’d protect him, and that nothin’ bad was gonna happen, but I couldn’t keep that promise. I ain’t ‘bout to go down in history as a liar, so I gotta get him back.”

“You’re really willing to risk your own neck for him?” asked Mitch. “Monsoon is  _ incredibly  _ hard to break into, much less escape from.”

“I’ve done it.  _ Twice _ .” Subject Seventeen’s gaze swivelled back to him, practically pinning him in place. “I ain’t no coward. I ain’t ‘bout to let Akio  _ rot  _ in that place while they do god-knows-what to him. Oh wait, I  _ do  _ know what, ‘cause I’ve had it done to me.” 

They stood, towering over him, and leaned close. Even though the spoke in a low voice, Mitch could hear every word.

“I’m gettin’ my friend back,” they said. “And  _ you’re  _ gonna help me.”

“ _ Me? _ ” he squeaked.

“Yep. You. Right now, Mitch, you got a few choices.” They held up a forefinger. “One, you can refuse to help me, in which case I’ll be forced to drag your ass out somewhere where no one’s gonna find it and bury you so deep in the snow it’ll be  _ April  _ by the time they find you.”

Mitch trembled in fear. He stared deep into Subject Seventeen’s eyes. He had no doubt in his mind that they would do that.

“Two,” they said slowly, “you could pretend to help me, then stab me in the back. Admittedly, that may result in my capture, but if I was to  _ ever  _ come close to you again, I would break your fuckin’ neck where you stand. I guarantee you that if I heard them coming, the first thing I would do would be butcher you alive before they drag me away.”

Mitch nodded. His tongue felt uncomfortable in his mouth. He tasted bile in his throat, but he forced himself to swallow it.

“Three,” said Subject Seventeen, “you can cooperate. Akio gets out of there, safe an’ sound, and he and I will disappear. I was never here. If you do this for me, you will have my gratitude, which is an exceptionally valuable thing to have.” They sat back on the coffee table and rested their elbows on their knees. “I’m a very powerful ally, my word can sway the direction of an entire group of people, many of which have incredible abilities. Even on my own, I’m a force to be reckoned with.”

Mitch mulled this over. He figured that he would much rather have Seventeen’s strength on his side rather than be staring down the barrel of their gun.

“Alright,” he said, “it seems like you’ve twisted my arm. I’ll help you. What can I do?”

“First, you can lean forward and I’ll take the tape off.”

Mitch obliged. He winced when Seventeen’s knife nicked his wrist.

“Sorry,” they said gruffly. They sat back on the coffee table while Mitch picked the tape bits from his jacket. “I haven’t really introduced myself, have I? Apologies. My name is Levitan Reeves, and if you so much as  _ think  _ about referring to me as “Subject Seventeen”, I’ll break all the bones in your hand. One. By. One.”

Mitch nodded hastily. “Y-you got it, Levitan.”

“Good,” they said. “You’ve probably heard lotsa stories ‘bout me, some of which may be true. I’ve been ‘round longer than everybody you’ve ever met in your life, and I like to think I look pretty damn good for my age. I ain’t adverse to the occasional bout of murder and mayhem, so keep that in mind as we get to know each other and plan this thing.”

“Alright, sure,” he said, not sure what he should think about all this.

“Do you have work tomorrow?”

“Uh… It’s Saturday, so I only have to go in for a little bit.”

“Perfect.” They yawned and rubbed their eyes with their fists like a child. “Christ, I’m tired. I haven’t had a good night’s sleep in… god, I dunno. Fuck it. We can start planning in the morning.”

“Okay. Alright.” Mitch didn’t really like the idea of falling asleep with Subj-  _ Levitan  _ in the apartment.

Then again… they needed him. He was safe, as long as they needed him.

“You can take the couch,” he said as he got to his feet.

Levitan climbed onto the couch and flopped down. “Don’t mind if I do.” They kicked off their combat boots and they thudded heavily to the floor.

Mitch scurried into the bathroom and locked the door behind him. He leaned against the door and sank down until he was sitting on the laminate tile. He put his face in his hands and wondered what he did to deserve this.

He brushed his teeth and crept out of the bathroom a few minutes later. He peeked into the living room.

Levitan was sprawled out on the couch, a forearm over their eyes, the TV playing kids cartoons at a low volume. Their mouth was open and they snored loudly.

Mitch huffed out a breath as he locked himself in his bedroom. He began to wonder what the heck Akio saw in them.

 

Mitch woke to the sound of pots and pans clanking together in the kitchen. He panicked for a split second before remembering that he had a guest. Then he panicked  _ again  _ when he remembered who his guest  _ was. _

It took him ten minutes of working himself up to force himself to leave his room and go into the kitchen. Levitan Reeves sat at the table with a cup of black coffee, a bowl of oatmeal, and the morning paper in their hand.

“Mornin’,” they said, without looking up from the paper. They held it at arm’s length and squinted at it as they read the comics. “Help yourself to some oatmeal. It’s on the stove, brown sugar’s on the table.”

“... Thanks?” he said, slightly confused by their polite demeanour. He walked over to the stove and examined the pot of oatmeal that was sitting there.

It appeared to be harmless. It was still warm, and it smelled really good. Mitch shrugged and scooped a few spoonfuls into a bowl. If Levitan was poisoning him, at least he’d die with some food in his belly.

He sat down across from them at the table, sprinkled brown sugar on his oatmeal, and began to eat. It was really good.

Mitch wondered where they got the mix for it. He didn’t keep any in his apartment.

“So,” said Levitan, pushing their bowl aside. “We don’t have time for small-talk, so let’s just  _ pretend  _ I asked you how you slept an’ how your team is doin’ in the playoffs. We got more important shit to discuss.”

“Like what?” he asked over his oatmeal. 

“I need help with  _ this. _ ” They reached into their backpack and pulled out a laptop. At least, Mitch  _ thought  _ it was a laptop. It looked like it had been cobbled together from old microwave bits and scrapped cellphones.

“What am I supposed to do with  _ that? _ ” he asked.

“Hang on, just…” Levitan turned it on and spun it towards them. “I have all the blueprints of Monsoon on here, but the labelling is super fucked up. You gotta help me decipher it.” They pulled up the blueprints and turned the laptop back towards Mitch.

It was perfectly legible to Mitch, partly because he knew how the map system at Monsoon worked already, and partly because he had 20-20 vision. He began to suspect that Levitan needed glasses, but he didn’t dare bring it up.

“If I was to sneak into this establishment  _ undetected, _ ” said Levitan, “how would I go ‘bout it?”

Alright, they were really doing this. Mitch pulled a pad of paper towards himself.

“Let’s list what  _ isn’t  _ gonna work, first,” he said. “First, you won’t be able to walk in through the front door.”

“Duh,” they said, rolling their eyes and leaning back in their chair.

“Second, we have a very high security system, so there’s no way you can break in. You’re gonna need to sneak in.”

“Stealth is not my strong suit,” they said.

Mitch looked them over, taking in their massive height, broad shoulders, and remembering their thundering footsteps. “No, it’s not.”

He pretended not to see the sharp glare that Levitan gave him.

Mitch started scribbling down idea after idea, then crossing each one out when it was deemed ill-suited to their purposes. Go through the vents? No, they were too big. Sneak into the building in one of the delivery crates? No, the big crates weren’t coming for another week. He had no idea how to disengage the security network, it was too big to disable all at once and it would set the entire place on high alert.

“I have a question.”

“Shoot,” they said.

“Where did you get these blueprints?”

“ _ I  _ didn’t,” said Levitan. “Let’s just leave it at that.”

Their tone brokered no nonsense, so Mitch resumed scribbling on the notepad.

When he glanced up, his heart gave a strange leap. Levitan had pulled out a gun and was cleaning it. They checked the mechanisms, looked down the barrel, and wiped the grit from the outside of it. They hummed to themself while they worked.

“I have a question.”

“Not very charismatic. Go on.”

He glowered. “I just wanted to  _ ask  _ whether you go by “he” or “she”.”

“I go by “they,” they said without looking at him. “And my pronouns aren’t important to what you ought to be workin’ on, although I do appreciate the courtesy.”

Mitch turned back to his work. 

It was quiet in the kitchen for a few minutes, except for the sound of Mitch’s pen scribbling on the page, the sound of the  _ second  _ gun being cleaned, and Levitan’s slightly melancholy hum.

“What about a disguise?” he asked.

Levitan made a slight face. “Last time I tried a disguise, it didn’t work out all that great.”

Mitch tapped his pen against his lower lip. “We could dress you up as a scientist and-”

“Are you fuckin’  _ kiddin’ me? _ ” they asked, the note of anger in their voice making him wince. “There’s no way in  _ hell  _ that I’m gonna be able to get within a mile o’ that place without somebody recognizin’ my face.”

“Then we’ll cover it,” he said as another idea popped into his head. “There are half a dozen guys that handle the hazardous waste and nuclear materials. They all wear hazmat suits, you can’t see an inch of skin.”

“Are there any guys there  _ remotely  _ my size?” they asked.

Mitch scratched his head, then snapped his fingers. “Yeah! There’s this one dude who’s a  _ giant,  _ six foot three at least!”

“I’m six one,” they said. “People are gonna notice a few inches, particularly ‘cause Monsoon’s keepin’ a close watch for me. They know my height an’ weight, they’d notice if a guy showed up a couple inches short, people would get suspicious.”

“He’s also heavier than you,” he said, “We can pad you up, make you look a little more heavyset, get you thick-soled shoes to make you taller.”

Levitan nodded slowly. “Alright. I can work with this so far.” They scratched the back of their neck. “Shit, how’s Monsoon bumped up security since I escaped?”

Mitch cringed. “Patrols through the halls, more security cameras, defense systems that are riddled with viruses so they can’t be hacked, that’s all I’m privy to.”

“Fuck.” Levitan pinched the bridge of their nose. “They upped the ante,  _ of course. _ ”

“Of course,” he agreed. “You’re  _ dangerous. _ ”

“I  _ know  _ that,” they snapped, slamming their hands onto the table and making him jump. “Fuck, we’re  _ never  _ gonna make it in there. How’re you gonna smuggle out the hazmat suit, pal? How am I gonna find out where Akio is being kept? How’re we gonna get ‘em to lower their guard?”

Mitch took a breath. “Okay. I have some ideas, but you’re gonna have to trust me.”

“Also not my strongest suit,” they said warily.

“How about I go into work,” he said slowly. “I think I know how I can get my hands on one of the hazmat suits. I have access to the security cameras behind the front desk, and if I don’t have access to that, I  _ do  _ have access to  _ gossip.  _ Hopefully that can help me find Akio.”

“I think I know how I can get the security to go AWOL,” said Levitan slowly. They stood abruptly, cocked their weapons, and hid them inside their hoodie. “Go to work. I’ll meet you back here in three hours, okay?”

“Okay.” Mitch finished off his oatmeal and turned to grab his boots. By the time he tied the laces, Levitan was gone, the front door left slightly ajar.

 

Mitch arrived at work half an hour later, with his briefcase and a crate full of machine parts that he intended to give to the staff down in the lower levels. He hadn’t been ordered to do this, but he had a fairly convincing phony copy of a document saying that he had in case anybody called him out on it. Orders got messed up all the time, it happened. He hoped that it was believable enough.

He wheeled the crate through the halls of the lower levels and remembered his brief time working down there. It was okay, but he didn’t have the stomach for a lot of stuff they were doing, down here. His specialty was cloning, not surgery or mutation studies.

He winced at a distant scream.

He wondered if it was Akio’s.

He felt sick at that thought.

“Delivery,” he said when he walked into the bio-mechatronics lab, then he had to stop himself from gagging.

A woman was splayed out on the table. Her stomach was opened up, all he could see inside were metal parts. She wasn’t moving.

One of the scientists turned to look at him. “Oh? So soon?”

“Yep,” he said. He held out the clipboard. “Just some donations. Sign here.”

The second scientist pried open the crate. “Sweet! Some new jumper cables! We can use these to start its hard.” He jerked his thumb towards the woman on the table.

Mitch felt like he was seeing this all through fresh eyes. It didn’t  _ horrify  _ him, he’d been hardened against that, but he began to feel… sympathetic? No, more than that.  _ Empathetic. _ Less than a month ago, his friend Akio stood beside him at his desk, cracking lame jokes about bioluminescence, and now he was down here having experiments done on him.

It could have been him.

Mitch swallowed the lump in his throat. “I-I’m sorry, but I have to keep the crate for another delivery. Can I help you put this stuff away?”

“Oh, sure,” said the first scientist. “That would be great, thanks.”

The second scientist hooked the jumper cables up to the woman on the table. There was a spark and her limbs spasmed. Mitch couldn’t help feeling disgusted at their cavalier attitude.

He placed the machine parts on the shelf and ignored the sound of sparks behind him.

 

“You wanna borrow my  _ what? _ ”

“ _ Borrow  _ isn’t the right word,” said Mitch. “I’m under orders to take it upstairs to be checked over for deficiencies. Just routine stuff.”

“My hazmat suit is  _ fine _ ,” said David, folding his arms. He towered over everybody he met, but Mitch tried not to be intimidated. “Tell your little “ _ boss _ ” to buzz off.”

“Listen, man,” said Mitch, leaning against his dolly. “I’m gonna get my  _ ass  _ handed to me if I don’t get this up there. It’s just routine. I’ll have it back to you tomorrow, I pinky promise!”

David pinched his brow. “I  _ need  _ this one today. I can’t give you my suit.”

“Look,” said Mitch. “I’m pretty sure I need it more. It’s a matter of life and death.”

“Really?” he asked, sounding uninterested.

“Really!”

“Well, fuck it. _ I ain’t givin’ you my suit! _ ”

Mitch didn’t want to have to play this card, but he was left with no choice. “Hey, do you remember a certain Friday night, say, three months ago?”

David narrowed his eyes. “ _ Which  _ Friday night?”

“The Friday night where I sold you a hundred bucks of weed, we got stoned out of our minds, then you went up to the upper levels and took a shit on-”

David’s eyes went wide and the colour drained from his bearded face. “ _ Okay, okay! _ ” he said, holding his hands out placatingly. “We can work out a deal!”

“The deal is I want the suit,” he said. “No promises on getting it back to you.”

David spluttered. “ _ That thing cost the company two grand! _ ”

“How many figures do you make?” asked Mitch. “I’m sure you can afford to replace a suit more than you can afford me telling the higher-ups about the Notorious Desk Shitter.”

David dragged a hand down his face. “I hate your fuckin’ guts, Mitch.”

“Tell you what,” said Mitch, “drop by my place next Friday. I have some more stuff lying around. We can play video games and get stoned. Sound good?”

David growled. “Fuck you.”

“You’ll come around,” said Mitch.

“ _ I know I will,  _ that’s why I’m mad  _ now. _ ” He jerked his thumb at the hazmat suit hanging on the wall. “Just fuckin’ take it.”

Mitch had a spring in his step as he carted the hazmat suit in the crate back upstairs.

 

Mitch was behind his desk in his cubicle, stamping forms. The crate was out in his car. He was running late. He was supposed to be back at his apartment in half an hour, but it was gonna take him longer than that to get home.

He looked up to his computer and flicked through the security cameras. He was supposed to just monitor the outside video cameras, but he knew he had access to the lower levels if something went wrong.

The sound of sirens blasted through the building below his feet.

It seemed like something had gone wrong.

Mitch hopped up onto his chair and stuck his head up above his cubicle. He could faintly hear the muffled sound of the loudspeaker in the lower levels.

“ _... subject has been located! All security is required to report to the Conference Room. All scientific personnel are required to be on high alert. All office personnel are encouraged to evacuate as soon as possible. Repeat: Subject Seventeen has been located! An escaped subject has been located! All- _ ”

Mitch panicked. His fellow workers began to file out of the office. He quickly flicked through the cameras, head spinning as he tried to find the right one. Tiny rooms full of people wearing white, often lying motionless on their cots or curled up into fetal positions in the corner. Some were punching the walls.

He almost skipped right past what he was looking for.

Akio sat in his cell, an open notepad in his lap. He seemed to be drawing or writing. His jumpsuit looked grubby, and his shoulders were slouched.

Mitch jotted down the coordinates on his hand, grabbed his briefcase, and walked out towards his front doors. He passed by security guards heading up to the Conference Room, and heard them chatting together. 

“... heard Seventeen was spotted ‘round Austin,” said one guard that Mitch passed. She was wearing the day guard uniform, which wasn’t nearly as protective as the uniforms of the men and women who guarded the lower levels.

“Yeah,” said her friend, “They’ve been on high alert ever since what happened in…”

Mitch felt relief wash over him, but he had no idea why. 

 

Mitch arrived back home with the crate in tow and locked the door behind him. He stopped dead when he smelled a  _ very  _ recognizable odor.

“You’ve  _ got  _ to be kidding me,” he said as he dropped the heavy crate onto the floor, right onto his foot. “ _ OW! _ ” He yanked it out from underneath the heavy box, tears coming to his eyes. He knew that was gonna bruise.

“ _ Hey! _ ” Levitan gave him a carefree wave from their spot on the couch. They were once again watching cartoons, and they held something in their hand. “Whatcha got there?”

“The hazmat suit,” he said. “For our  _ plan,  _ the one that requires you to be  _ sober. _ ”

“Pfft.” Levitan took a draw on the blunt and exhaled a cloud of smoke with a satisfied sigh. “Being sober  _ sucks,  _ especially when you’re caught in a dilemma like I am.”

“What dilemma is that?” asked Mitch dryly as he walked over to them.

“Hating yourself and wanting to die sometimes but being  _ physically  _ unable to,” said Levitan. They held out the joint. “Wanna puff?”

Mitch narrowed his eyes. He plucked it from their fingers, took a draw, held it, then exhaled. He felt the tension melt from his limbs, and he plopped down onto the couch next to Levitan.

“My brain knows that I should feel like shit,” said Levitan, taking the blunt back, “But this weed makes me feel  _ so  _ much better ‘bout myself.”

“We shouldn’t be doing this,” said Mitch.

“It’s barely three o’clock. We ain’t gonna go until it gets dark.”

“They’re lookin’ for you in Austin.”

“I know,” they said with a silly grin. “I’m pretty damn good at imitations.”

“Where’d you call from?”

“Disposable phone. I crushed it when I was done.”

“Shit, man.”

“Thanks.” They took another puff and passed it back to Mitch.

He stared at Levitan for a moment. Their eyes were slightly red. “I don’t get it,” he said thoughtfully. He blew out a cloud of smoke.

“Don’t get what?” They took it back. “Hey, watch this.” Levitan took another draw, then puffed a perfect smoke ring.

“Whoa,” he said, impressed. He’d  _ never  _ been able to get that good at smoke rings, no matter how hard he tried.

“What don’t you get?” asked Levitan.

“I don’t get why you’re willing to risk your life for Akio,” said Mitch. “Don’t you just wanna save your own skin? You just got outta there, why are you so eager to get close to the place just to bust one guy out? Don’t you have a sense of self-preservation?”

“I’m not like that,” they said, stubbing out the blunt on an ash tray. “He means a lot to me.”

“You haven’t known him all that long.”

Levitan let out a long breath. “I know, but… I dunno. There’s just somethin’ about him that makes my head dizzier than a kid on a tires wing.”

“He likes you,” said Mitch. “He told me.”

“I sure hope he does,” they said with a slight smirk. “He  _ seemed  _ to like me when he planted his lips right here.” They pointed to their mouth.

“No way,” said Mitch. “He made a  _ move? _ ”

“I guess I sorta started it,” they mused. “It’s a long story.” They let out a sigh, then their expression fell. “I said I’d protect him. I fucked up real bad.”

“Don’t say that,” said Mitch. He looked up at Levitan.

“I’m gonna get him outta there,” they said, clenching their fists. “I  _ swear  _ it. I’m gonna fuckin’... I dunno. When I get him out, I’m gonna take him, put blankets over him, and make sure he feels good an’ safe.” They touched their mouth, as if remembering a kiss. “We cuddled an’ kissed. We only just figured out what we wanted from each other. Fuck, man, it’s been so long since anybody’s  _ liked  _ me like that.” They rubbed their eyes. “I miss him so fuckin’ much.”

“He was a good friend,” said Mitch.

“ _ Is.  _ He  _ is  _ a good friend, he isn’t fuckin’ dead, not through lack o’ tryin’.”

“Not through lack of trying?”

“If I was to blast out my brains right here an’ now,” said Levitan, “I’d wake up in less than twenty minutes. Akio an’ I? We can’t die.  _ Ever. _ ”

“... Ever?” asked Mitch, dumbfounded.

“Yeah.  _ Ever.  _ Thanks to y’all.” They sighed and sank into the couch. “I wanna hold Akio in my arms again before the day is done.”

Mitch didn’t hate Levitan, anymore. Even though his head was woozy, he could tell that underneath that gruff, crusty exterior, Levitan had some impressive character. They were fiercely loyal, for one. They had a lot of love to give. They were brave, daring, and ruthless on behalf of those they cared about.

Mitch realized that he admired them, at least a little. He was still terrified of them, and he knew he always would be, but he could understand what Akio sees in them.

Levitan let their head tilt back. “I’m such a shithead. I left the rest of ‘em without sayin’ anything.”

“The rest of them?” he asked.

“Wouldn’t  _ you  _ like to know,” they said, without any real bitterness.

Mitch didn’t reply.

It was quiet for a few minutes. The TV played Looney Toons in the background. The apartment stank of weed, but he didn’t care. He just hoped that Levitan hadn’t smoked his entire stash, or David would be  _ pissed. _

“The last time I kissed him,” said Levitan unprompted, “It was right before he was captured.”

Mitch almost got the sense that they were barely aware he was there. “Yeah?”

“I don’t want that to be our last kiss, man,” they said, looking up at the ceiling. “It was fuckin’ shitty. I want…” They made a vague gesture with their hands. “I wanna  _ romance  _ the fucker. I wanna take ‘im up onto the roof so we can look at the stars and make out. I wanna make him feel all good inside, the way he makes me feel with all his stupid compliments and dumb little smiles.” They were red in the face. “I hate how fuckin’ cute he is, he makes me wanna break shit.”

Mitch snorted. “Articulate as always.”

That earned him a cuff on the ear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yo! Thanks for reading my original work! Shoot me a comment if you like!


	5. Broken Pairs of Glasses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The escape plan is launched.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: reference to gore, violence, symptoms of trauma

There were a few times that Akio got to associate with the other mutants in Monsoon. Most notably being mealtimes, during showers, and during the five hours every few days when the cells were cleaned. He’d seen some horrifying mutations, and heard some terrible stories, he’d grown almost numb to them.

Akio didn’t talk to anybody, as a general rule. Sometimes, he sat and listened quietly to conversations. Some mutants grouped together to converse, check in, and support each other. Nobody spoke much louder than a whisper. Guards with tranquilizer guns stood at the doors to keep people in check.

“Hey.”

Akio looked up from his porridge. He’d been required to take it, but he hadn’t been able to stomach eating anything since two days ago when the scientists had decided to open up his chest cavity to look inside. He hadn’t been under anesthetic then, either.

A woman stood above him. She had talons and her teeth protruded from her mouth.

“Hey,” he said flatly.

“You were one of them,” she said accusingly. She didn’t need to explain what she meant.

“I know. I didn’t know any better.” He poked at his meal, gaze lowered. “Now, I’m one of you.”

“Everybody knows what happened,” she said, folding her arms. “Levitan Reeves kidnapped you.”

“Yeah. They did.”

“How are you still alive?” she asked angrily. “Why didn’t they off you?”

“It wasn’t for lack of trying,” he said. His voice had no tone, no emotion. He didn’t have the energy. “I can’t die. I’m like Levitan.”

“You’re  _ not  _ like them,” she snapped.

“... You’re right. I’m not.” He sighed. “If you’re gonna kick the shit outta me, just do it.”

The woman shifted on her feet. “We try not to make things harder on ourselves, here.”

“Okay. Then why do you wanna talk to me?”

The woman lowered her voice. “ _ Where’s Levitan Reeves? We’re trying to keep tabs on them. _ ”

“I don’t know,” he said. “Hopefully, they’re far from here.” He pushed his tray away. “Eugh. This tastes like shit.”

The woman let out a sigh and straightened up, popping her back. “You should eat,” she said. “You need your strength to survive, here.”

“ _ I can’t die! _ ” he hissed. “No matter what I do, I’ll keep hanging on. Besides, this stuff reminds me too much of what my own  _ entrails  _ looked like.”

The woman nodded. “Fair enough.”

She gave him a little two fingered salute as she walked past him.

That hadn’t been the first time he’d been asked about Levitan, and he was sure it wouldn’t be the last. Mutant gossip travelled faster than wildfire, especially because he was fairly positive that there was at least one or two telepaths in the institution. People had asked him about their whereabouts, how they were doing, who they were with, what they were planning next. He tried to answer with speculations in the beginning, but as time passed his answers deteriorated to shrugs and quiet “ _ I don’t know _ ”s.

He tapped his fingers on the table, one by one, over and over again, in a rhythmic pattern. He could hear giggles from one side of the cafeteria, and quiet sobs from the other.

Nobody else bothered him for that lunch period.

 

Akio couldn’t make himself do anything but draw patterns on his notepad with the felt tip marker. Concentric circles, little zigzags, triangles full of smaller triangles, and basic fractals. His head was swimming, he tried to push away the memories of the pain, but they kept coming back whenever he stopped drawing. 

He focussed all of his attention on tracing the patterns on the paper with the marker. The sound and the sensation and the colourful patterns soothed him. His drawings covered the floor of his cell, some of them were folded into little origami shapes.

Akio tore another page off of his notepad with a satisfying rip. He squared off the paper, folded it in half, and creased it with his thumbnail.

He started to fold a butterfly. Origami had been one of his hobbies in elementary school. He’d filled up his desk with little paper cranes until the papers had spilled out whenever he’d tried to take out one of his textbooks. He was glad that he remembered a great deal of it, he didn’t exactly have any guidebooks to help him out at the moment.

The butterfly sat on his palm. It was small, but it was well-crafted. It must have been the hundredth one he’d made since coming here.

He never got to keep his drawings or origami for long. Every few days, the Monsoon workers would sweep his cell and take out the “garbage”. When he’d tried to tell them to stop, they cracked him in the kneecap with a baton.

The butterfly glided just a little bit when he tossed it. It came to rest gently on the floor.

Suddenly, a siren blared through the lower levels. Akio panicked, seized his blankets and pulled them over his head, curling up into a little ball on the corner of his cot. He pressed his hands over his ears and squeezed his eyes tight shut to block out the noise. His heart thudded loudly in his chest.

He could hear shouts and the pounding of footsteps. Then, he heard the voice over the loudspeaker.

“ _... security is required to report to the Conference Room. All scientific personnel are required to be on high alert. All office personnel are encouraged to evacuate as soon as possible. Repeat: Subject Seventeen has been located! An escaped subject has… _ ”

Akio covered his mouth to hold in his gasp, but despite himself, the tears began to roll down his cheeks. He sobbed, furiously wiping his eyes with his fingers.

Levitan had been found. They were gonna get stuck back in here, just like he was.

Distantly, he could hear wails of despair and horror. He could hear the other mutants banging against their cell walls and screaming. He could hear inhuman shrieks and growls that rattled the teeth in his skull. He could hear the guards ordering them to shut up.

“ _ Not Levitan! _ ” he could hear one voice shouting from far away.

Akio rubbed his hands over his knees. He could hear the guards running past as they were summoned to the Conference Room.

He felt like his chest was caving in.

 

“Do you remember where you’re going?” asked Mitch. He had both hands on the steering wheel.

“I do.” Levitan was all geared up in the passenger side. They adjusted their gloves, then slipped a small cloth bundle into the the pocket on the belt of the suit. “Thanks for gettin’ me this far, Mitch. You’re a trooper.”

“Never do this to me again.”

Levitan chuckled. “Heh, no promises.”

Mitch leaned his forehead against the steering wheel and let out an exasperated moan.

“Hey, if this goes according to plan, then I ain’t gonna  _ need  _ you, again,” they said. They clapped a friendly hand to his shoulder. “I’m gonna tell Akio all you did for us.”

“There’s no need for that,” he said, waving them off with a careless flick of his fingers. “You better get outta here. I don’t want my car to be spotted.”

“Alright, alright.” They shifted the gas mask into place, and pulled the helmet over their head. The tinted glass ensured that very little of their face could be seen. They pressed the speaker button on their chest. “ _ How do I look? _ ” Their voice was tinny through the speaker.

“You look just like David.” Their suit had been padded out to match the man’s chub, and they wore platforms on their shoes. “Just don’t talk much, your voice gives you away.”

“ _ What’s his voice like? _ ” Their breath was audible through the speaker.

“Low, gruff, Brooklyn accent.”

Levitan cleared their throat and adopted a new tone. “ _ Like this? _ ”

Mitch made a face. “Maybe if he had a frog in his throat?”

“ _ Alright, alright, _ ” they said, switching back to their usual accent. “ _ I’ll keep quiet. What if I bump into the guy? _ ”

“You won’t,” said Mitch. “He never comes in at night, and I just called him. He’s heading over to my place.”

“ _ You better go. _ ”

“I better. Hopefully, I won’t see you again.”

Levitan snorted, then took their finger off the button on their chest.

Mitch kept his hands on the wheel while they climbed out of the car, then opened up the back seat and took out a box full of “radioactive” materials they brought to give them a reason to be wearing the suit. As soon as the doors slammed shut, he took off at lightning speed. His tires screeched and the car fishtailed as he pulled away.

Levitan watched him drive around the corner. They found themself standing in ankle-deep snow, looking up at the big white Monsoon logo that cast a pale glow in the dark night.

Every instinct was telling them to flee, but they couldn’t. They had to get to Akio.

They realized that it was probably a little weird to show up to work in a hazmat suit, but this David guy supposedly did it often enough to be considered not out of the ordinary.

Levitan walked up to the building. The doors slid open for them. There wasn’t anybody at the front desk, so they let themself past, towards the elevators that led downstairs. They didn’t have the best sense of direction, and they just  _ prayed  _ they wouldn’t get lost.

The elevator doors opened with a small ding. Levitan felt sick to their stomach when they saw the white walls, the white floors, and the white lights. They had to momentarily close their eyes against the bright light and steel themself before stepping out of the elevator. It took a few moments for them to gain the courage to open their eyes.

The halls sprawled out before them. They could hear voices speaking in low tones. They shuddered when they heard a distant scream, but couldn’t help feeling a tiny bit relieved when they realized it wasn’t Akio’s.

A group of scientists bustled past them, not giving them a second glance. Levitan felt their heart drop when they saw one of them pull out a key card to swipe through the door. They didn’t have one of those.  _ Shit. _

They put one foot in front of the other as they made their way down to the generator room, praying that by taking this detour to get rid of their cargo, they weren’t gonna get lost or waste too much time. They opened the door to the generator, jogged down a short flight of stairs, kicked the box under the steps, and turned to walk back up.

“ _ David,  _ my  _ man! _ ” A hand clapped onto their shoulder, and it took every ounce of control on Levitan’s behalf to not whip around and snap his arm off.

The guy who’d come up behind him was a big man, burly but not as tall as Levitan. “How’s it hanging?”

Levitan faked a cough, pressed the button on their chest and said, “ _ Sore throat _ ,” with their best Brooklyn accent.

“Ooh, you sound  _ rough,  _ dude.” The guy took his hand off their shoulder. “Listen, can you punch me out, later? I’m meeting up with my girl, Felicia. Damn, I’m sure I’m gonna ask her to marry me, man! She’s the  _ one! _ ”

Levitan gave a shaky thumbs up and started back up the stairs.

“Why’re you wearing your suit, dude?” the guy asked.

Levitan held back a sigh and made a vague spiralling gesture with their hand that implied “long story”.

“Ah, say no more.” The guy headed back over to the boiler. “Get some sleep tonight, man. Hope your throat feels better.”

Levitan gave another thumbs up and quickly dashed back up the stairs. That was  _ close.  _ Too close. They had to avoid talking to anybody else. If somebody a bit smarter or someone who knew David better had come across them, they would’ve been found out for sure.

There was one more thing they had to do, first.

They walked briskly down the halls, scanning them for unwary scientists. One or two newbie scientists scampered down the hallway. Levitan deliberately checked shoulders with one of them and sent him sprawling, arms reeling and legs flying out from under him.

“ _ Hey, watch it! _ ” snapped the guy from his spot on the floor. Levitan could see his lanyard dangling from his pocket.

Levitan pressed the button on their chest. “ _ Sorry, sorry. _ ” They yanked him to his feet with enough force to pull him to their chest.

The scientist swatted their hands away. “Jeez, just be careful, huh?”

Levitan gave a nod as the scientist walked down the hallway. They held his lanyard in their hand.

They detached the key card, tossed the keys away, and kept walking at a smart clip. They tried to picture the layout of this place in their head, but it was almost impossible. They tried to remember which way to go, and they were  _ pretty  _ sure they had to make a left, but-

They trusted their instincts and turned, then they couldn’t help their sigh of relief. They recognized this place. This was where they’d had the shootout with the guard during their escape less than a month previously. Akio had to be close.

Levitan picked up the pace. The screams were getting louder, which meant they were getting close to the labs. They passed by doors that said “ _ Nanotechnology _ ”, “ _ Biomechanics Department _ ”, and finally “ _ Experimental Surgical Procedures _ ”. They heard voices talking in hushed whispers and heard whimpers from the mutants.

They came across a locked door. It said “ _ Genetic Engineering _ ”.

This was it.

Levitan swiped their card through the reader. It blinked green and the machine chirped as the screen read “ _ Access Granted _ ”. 

They opened the door.

 

Akio tried to read, but it wasn’t a fruitful process. He held a copy of “ _ The Fellowship of the Ring _ ” in his hands, but all he’d been able to accomplish in the last hour was reading the same few pages over and over again, because his tired brain just couldn’t quite grasp the meaning. He wanted to sleep, but he knew that as soon as he closed his eyes he’d be transported back to that steel table in the laboratory, and the scientists would be chopping off another part of him to watch it grow back.

He closed the book and set it aside. Today hadn’t been good. They’d extracted five pints of blood from his veins, partly to experiment on the blood itself, partly to see how fast his body could replace it. Not fast enough, in Akio’s opinion. He still felt woozy from the process, and that had been a few hours ago… after the sirens had finally stopped.

There were fewer guards patrolling the halls. The screams of the mutants had quieted down long ago. Akio couldn’t stop worrying. He hoped Levitan was okay. He hoped they all were.

There were heavy footsteps coming down the hall, but Akio ignored them. It was probably a guard.

When they got closer, he faltered. They sounded a little bit… different. Maybe more urgent?

They came to a stop outside his cell door. He’d already had his appointment, today. What was going on?

Akio didn’t have any weapons, but he had fists, elbows, fingernails and teeth, which would have to do. He backed himself up against the wall, hands clenched tightly into fists, and waited to see who would come to torment him, now.

The door swung open and a  _ huge  _ figure stepped through. They were wearing a white hazmat suit with a tinted face shield. Their gloves and boots were black, and their breath was laboured. They seemed immobilized at the sight of him, pressed into the corner, with drawings and origami laid out all around him.

“ _ Fuck off! _ ” he screamed in Japanese. He’d figured out a few days ago that yelling at the Monsoon workers in another language tended to scare them off a little more. “ _ Don’t fucking come near me! I-I’m not about to be radiated to a crisp! Get the fuck out of my cell! _ ”

The person in the hazmat suit didn’t move, at first. Akio was tempted to launch himself at them, but he figured that his nails weren’t gonna do much damage to someone wearing thick rubber.

“ _ GET OUT! _ ” he yelled, taking a step forward.

The figure held up a forefinger.

This gesture startled him. Most of the time, when he threw a tantrum, he was either punished or ignored. He wasn’t… asked to  _ wait. _

The figure popped a button on the belt of their suit, and pulled a small bundle from the pocket. They were exceptionally gentle, even with their clumsy gloved hands.

It didn’t look like a weapon, but Akio didn’t dare to get any closer. He watched, torn between curious and terrified, fists still at the ready.

With a shaking hand, they they unwrapped the bundle, tucked the cloth away, and held out the item for him to see.

It was a pair of ordinary glasses.

Wait. No, it wasn’t.

It was  _ his  _ pair of glasses.

In that instant, Akio knew immediately who this was. He wanted to laugh, and he wanted to drop to his knees and sob into his hands. He wanted to shout at them for coming when he told them not to, and he wanted to throw his arms around them for coming anyway. He wanted to take off that stupid helmet and either slap them for being stupid or kiss them for being stupid.

He didn’t do any of those things. He took his glasses from their hands and looked them over. They still had a tiny crack on one lense, and a tiny chip on the other.

Akio took the round glasses he was wearing and threw them to the floor. He crushed them with the heel of his foot and donned his old frames.

Levitan held out a pair of handcuffs.

Akio stiffened at the sight of them and opened his mouth to protest, but Levitan brought a forefinger to the front of their mask to shush him.

He closed his mouth. This was part of the plan. He had to go along with it. He reluctantly turned and let Levitan snap the cuffs onto his wrists. They were gentle, and they let their hand linger on his shoulder for a few moments before gripping him by the arms and steering him from the cell.

Akio’s heart pounded as the door slammed shut behind them. Levitan’s grip was firm, but it wasn’t painful. He wanted to lean back into their body, but he had to stay hunched forward. He kept his eyes on the floor.

They walked through the halls. It was late in the evening, and it was quiet. Few guards wandered the halls. Even the screams were softer. Their footsteps echoed in the halls. Akio’s shoes were soft and barely made a sound, Levitan’s boots thudded loudly.

Levitan swiped their keycard through the access door, and they left the experiment containment and entered the main laboratories.

They passed a group of younger scientists talking animatedly together. Two of them had done experiments on Akio. He steered his gaze away from them.

Levitan seemed to sense his discomfort. They squeezed his arm sympathetically.

They walked down another hallway, past the doors that muffled the sounds of machinery, slowly making their way towards the back. Akio found it a little strange to find himself being steered through the halls of Monsoon by Levitan once again, except this time  _ he  _ was the one wearing the jumpsuit.

“Excuse me.” A tall scientist stood before them, looking confused. “What’re you doing with Two-One-Oh-Three? His allotted time is over for the day.”

Akio could feel Levitan tense up. They pressed a button on their chest, and their voice came out through a tinny speaker.

“ _ Uh… _ ” they said. “ _ Look, man, I don’t question orders, I just follow ‘em. _ ”

“Follow these,” said the scientist tartly. “Take Two-One-Oh-Three back to his cell, then return that radiation hazard equipment to the generator room.”

“ _ Um… no? _ ”

“No?” he asked.

Akio could feel Levitan’s muscles coiling. He dropped to his knees and ducked.

Levitan leapt over him and slugged the scientist right in the jaw. Akio didn’t see it, but he heard the sick crack of bone, and the thud of his unconscious body hitting the floor. Levitan yanked him to his feet, and they began to run. The biohazard suit made Levitan clumsy and slow, and as they neared the stairs that would take them up, they started to take it off. 

First came the gloves, tossed carelessly aside. Then came the belt, the clatter made a few people call down towards where they were to see if anybody was there. There were shouts behind them. They kept running.

Then came the boots, unzipped and kicked off while Levitan ran, to reveal nothing but thick wool socks underneath. They worked off the body of the suit and kicked it aside as they fought to keep up with Akio, who glanced back at them as they stumbled. Voices called out behind them now, asking who they were and what they were doing.

Akio saw the guns at Levitan’s hips, and he felt safer.

Levitan swiped the card through the reader on the stairs, then tore off the helmet, hurling it aside.

Footsteps thundered after them as they were pursued. Somebody recognized them from afar, and calls of “ _ It’s Subject Seventeen! _ ” began to ring throughout the facility.

The alarms went off, again.

Akio trembled. He tried to remain upright, but he wanted to cover his ears and his hands were tied behind his back still. 

Levitan yanked the door open, and they sprinted up the steps. Akio was supported by Levitan under his arms, he was feeling weak in the knees.

There was a gunshot that sent bits of concrete from the steps exploding back up at them. Akio shrieked and yanked his wrists apart to cover his ears, sending bits of metal and plastic flying as the cuffs broke.

Levitan turned back down the stairs and returned fire, pegging two quick bullets into the guards who had shot at them.

Next thing Akio knew, he was being carried, cradled to Levitan’s chest. He gripped their sweater with two hands and buried his face in their shoulder, not caring that he was being jostled roughly, this was the first time anybody had touched him kindly in days… or had it been weeks?

There was a clang as Levitan forced open a fire door with their hip, then a snap of cold as they ran out into the snow.

There were sirens and shouts behind them, but they faded quickly. None of the vans were there. None of the heavily armed guards were there. None of the helicopters, or heavy-duty machine guns, or trained specialists were there.

They were all down in Texas.

There was nobody left at Monsoon to chase after them.

Levitan’s pace slowed from a sprint, to a jog, to a walk. Akio closed his eyes, still holding onto them. For the first time since he’d parted ways with Levitan, he began to feel good. He began to feel safe, again. Even in his crappy jumpsuit, he felt warm in their arms. His head was still muddled, his stomach gnawed at itself with hunger, and his body ached, but… god, he felt so much better.

Akio was hardly aware of being set down onto the cold pavement. He opened his eyes when Levitan cupped his cheeks and tilted his head up.

“Are you okay?” asked Levitan. Their silver eyes bore deeply into his brown ones.

They were in an alleyway. An old car with a dented fender was parked behind them. Akio looked up and saw the snowflakes drifting down, turned orange in the light of the street lamps. He looked down at his wrists and jangled his bonds plaintively. He hated the feeling of the cuffs on his wrists, even if his hands were no longer forced behind his back.

“Okay, sure.” Levitan took the key from the pocket of their cargo pants, unlocked the cuffs, then tossed them to the side, out of sight. “Is that better?”

They sounded so concerned, they were almost hesitant to touch him. Underneath the nervous surface, there was an underlying layer of excitement and joy. They were happy to have him back.

They’d really risked their own safety just for him. He couldn’t really believe it. He had honestly thought that they were going to leave him there. How had he had so little faith in them?

Akio couldn’t help himself. He threw his arms around Levitan’s neck and kissed them. He buried his fingers in their short blonde hair and deepened it immediately. He was sure that tears were running down his face, but to his delight Levitan kissed him back, matching his pace and passion. He soaked in their flavour, their scent, and the slightly sweet smell of weed that had him confused.

Levitan reluctantly pulled away. “Can you stand?”

“Mmhmm,” he said, but he wasn’t interested in standing. He punched them in the shoulder.

“ _ Hey!  _ What was that for?” they asked.

“For coming to get me,” he said, his voice cracked and shaking. He leaned in and placed another kiss on Levitan’s lips, this one a bit softer, a bit sweeter.

Levitan blinked when he pulled away. “What was  _ that  _ for?” they asked, confused.

“For coming to get me,” he repeated.

Levitan smiled and chuckled, then placed a kiss on Akio’s cheek. “I promised I’d look after you. I intend to keep it.” They took his hand in both of theirs and kissed his knuckles.

A phantom pain of bones snapping as his arm was ripped from his body flashed back into Akio’s mind. He hastily pulled away. Levitan looked crestfallen when he did that.

He noticed their saddened expression. “I’m-” he started.

“Shh, no,” said Levitan, putting their hands on his thighs. “You don’t gotta explain yourself to me, darlin’. I know what it’s like.”

Nobody had ever called him “ _ darling _ ”, before. It sounded so sweet in Levitan’s Texan accent, he decided that he wanted to hear them call him that every day of his life.

Akio’s emotions were muddled and confused. He felt a combination of wonderful heat and petrifying anxiety. They weren’t from the same things.

Levitan helped him to his feet by letting him put one hand on their forearm for balance and supporting his waist with the other one. They unlocked the car and kept their arm steady so he had a support while climbing in. He sat in the passenger seat and pulled his knees to his chest, wrapping his arms tightly around them.

He was vaguely aware of Levitan struggling to get their boots back on. The sound of sirens had faded away. It was quiet, now. There were sounds of traffic far away, and it was a huge improvement over the silence and the screams of Monsoon.

Levitan climbed into the car next to him. “Do you want music?” they asked as they shut the door as quietly as they could.

Akio nodded and didn’t say a word. He felt exhausted, right down to his bones. He could hardly keep his eyes open.

“Akio, may I touch you?”

He gave another nod.

Levitan’s fingers brushed his cheek. Their touch was soft, tentative, and comforting.

“Ain’t nothin’ bad gonna happen to you, now,” they said. “We’re gonna get outta this town and back to the others. I’m gonna take real good care o’ you, you can tell me as much or as lil’about it as you want, and I’ll listen.”

“Okay,” he said.

“You should sleep now,” they said as they started the car. It had been hotwired. Music began to play as soon as the engine started up, and Lev quickly changed the station to some sweet jazz that made him feel comforted.

“I don’t wanna have another nightmare,” he said, but his eyes were already closing.

“Darlin’, don’t you worry,” they said. “Nightmares are shit, but I’m here to keep you safe in the real world, okay?”

“Okay,” he mumbled.

He fell asleep within a few minutes as the car rumbled below him and gentle music played on the radio. Levitan draped their sweater over him when they thought he was asleep.

Akio buried his nose in Levitan’s sweater. Their scent was on the fabric.

It made him feel at home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maybe this could have been two chapters, but eh!  
> Comment if you liked it!


	6. By Their Side

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akio settles back into the base. Levitan helps.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: trauma symptoms, some long-awaited necking

James sat at the kitchen table. It was the middle of the night. He had a book in his hands. Levitan had been missing for over a day, and speculations were flying around the base, but James was almost positive that he knew where they were.

He took a sip of tea and prayed that they would be back soon.

His head snapped up when he heard a car pull up out front, then crunching footsteps in the snow approaching the barn. He set his book aside, picked up his rifle and cocked it.

The sound of people speaking in hushed whispers came through the door. He could hear the shoes being removed.

The kitchen door slowly creaked open. Levitan stood there with one hand on the doorknob and snow in their hair. Clinging to their arm and wearing a white jumpsuit was Akio Sato.

Just as he thought.

James let out a long sigh and set his gun down. “Welcome back, Lev.”

Levitan looked a little miffed that he didn’t greet Akio. They shut the door behind them, dropped their bag onto the floor, and turned to Akio, who had a very firm grip on their arm.

“Want something hot to drink?” they asked him.

“Yes, please,” he said quietly.

James winced. He saw the look in his eye, like a deer caught in the headlights. Vulnerable, scared, paranoid about every little scratch or creak in the building. Limbs tense, ready to spring into a fight at a moment’s notice. It was the look of someone who’d just spent time in Monsoon, and the white walls still haunted them. 

He had half a dozen other mutants living in this place with the same problems, who also needed Levitan’s help and leadership, and yet they had chosen to abandon the entire group to go save one man, and only one. Not only did they abandon them without so much as a note explaining where they had gone, they chose to risk their own safety for Akio.

James understood their decision, but it didn’t mean that he liked it.

Akio sat at the table and Levitan handed him a cup of tea before taking a seat between him and James.

“Not even an apology?” asked James.

“Why, do you want one?” asked Levitan.

“Not even a hello?” asked Akio, trying not to sound too bitter.

James let out a breath. “Hi, Akio. Are you okay?”

“Better than I was a few hours ago,” he said. He took a sip of tea and hummed with pleasure. 

“Can I touch you?” asked Levitan.

Akio nodded and set the cup down, holding it in his hands to feel the warmth. “Go ahead.”

James couldn’t help feeling more sympathetic when he saw the tender expression on Levitan’s face as they tucked a stray hair behind Akio’s ear and let their fingers linger on his jaw. He leaned his head into their hand, eyes closed.

“Hey, James?” came a voice from outside the kitchen. Naomi padded in with bare feet, two of her four hands rubbing her eyes as she yawned. “Thought I heard talking.”

“You did,” he said curtly.

Naomi froze when she saw Levitan and Akio sitting at the kitchen table. Her eyes flicked back and forth between them as she absorbed what she was seeing, then her shocked expression contorted into one of rage. She clenched her fists and bared her teeth.

“ _ THIS IS WHAT YOU WERE DOING?! _ ” she bellowed, pointing angrily at Akio with two of her hands. “Y-you ran away from us and drove to New York for  _ him?! _ ”

A few pairs of feet thudded through the house. Hawke, Ryan, and Dana burst into the room.

“ _ Lev! _ ” said Ryan. “You’re  _ back! _ ” His eyes fell to Akio, and he narrowed his gaze. “You’ve  _ got  _ to be kidding me.”

“You  _ broke him out of Monsoon? _ ” asked Dana, sounding torn between wonderment and horror.

“What were you  _ thinking? _ ” asked Hawke incredulously.

“No need to sound too excited to see me,” said Akio, he couldn’t help feeling a little disappointed, but he understood.

Ryan yawned, a hand over his mouth. “Nice to see you, dude. You look good, did you do somethin’ with your hair?” He yawned again. “Fuck, what time is it?”

James checked his watch. “Two AM.”

“Fuck it. I need ten hours and a good, hearty breakfast before I can deal with this.” He pointed at Lev. “I’m mad at you. You didn’t even say goodbye.” He pointed to Akio. “I’m glad you’re out, buddy. Sweet dreams.”

“You too,” said Akio.

Dana huffed out a sigh. “Yeah, glad you’re okay.”

“Glad you’re okay, too,” said Akio as she turned and followed Ryan from the room.

Naomi’s fists were still clenched. She looked like she wanted to hit Levitan.

“Go ahead,” said Levitan. “Spit it out.”

“ _ How could you? _ ” she demanded. “How could you  _ leave us  _ without saying  _ anything? _ Y-you didn’t tell us where you were going, what you were doing, or when you’d be back! You could’ve been captured, and we would’ve never known! How could you be so… so…  _ selfish? _ ”

“ _ Selfish? _ ” asked Akio before Levitan could speak. “Th-they risked their neck for me! That’s the opposite of selfish!”

Naomi flipped her hair over her shoulder. “Don’t be stupid. Levitan is one of the most valuable assets we have! They’re skilled, have intimate knowledge of Monsoon, and more importantly, they give the captive mutants  _ hope!  _ Lev, you’re one of the most important mutants out there, and you were willing to throw yourself away for  _ Akio? _ ”

“You’re saying Akio isn’t valuable?” asked Levitan with a low note in their voice that made Naomi steel herself slightly.

“I’m saying,” she muttered through gritted teeth, “That it wasn’t a smart move for you to make. That’s. All.”

“Nobody deserves to be tortured, Naomi,” said Hawke. “Wouldn’t  _ you  _ come after  _ me? _ ”

“Of course!” she said, “But  _ I’m not Levitan! _ If I go missing, so what? A few people will miss me, not  _ an entire revolutionary movement! _ ”

“I know you’re tryin’ to tell me to be more careful,” said Levitan warningly, “But right now what I’m hearin’ is that you don’t think Akio is worth my time.”

“He’s  _ not! _ ” snapped Naomi. “It wasn’t a smart move! You’re  _ selfish!  _ You couldn’t live with the  _ guilt  _ of not being able to protect your little  _ boytoy _ , so you had to get him back so you could sleep at night!”

The silence hung in the kitchen for a moment. Levitan’s look of anger sent chills down Naomi’s spine.

Akio clutched his hot mug. He realized that Levitan was angry on his behalf, simply because Naomi had disrespected him. That made him feel… protected. Levitan intended to protect him, and he really liked that.

He didn’t want them to hurt Naomi, though.

Levitan stood from the table, fists clenched. They stepped up to Naomi, who was abruptly reminded that Levitan  _ towered  _ over her and would likely best her in a brawl if it were to come to that.

“That’s enough,” they growled. “It was my decision. I’ll be the first to admit that I usually act with my gut an’ not with my head, so you’re right. I should’a talked to y’all, but I wasn’t in the state o’ mind to do that. There are two things you’re gonna do for me, right here and now.  _ Understood? _ ”

“Who died and made you God?” snapped Naomi.

Levitan didn’t reply. They slowly reached over, wrapped their hand around her wrist, and squeezed.

Naomi winced in pain. She subtly tried to tug away, but Levitan kept their grip firm. She huffed and tried to yank her hand from theirs forcefully, but Levitan squeezed her wrist to the point where she cried out.

There was the faint sound of machinery clinking and whirring as Hawke shifted his arm into a blade. Naomi held up a hand to tell him to back down.

“Lev, don’t,” said Akio quietly.

Levitan glanced at him, then back at Naomi. They loosened their grip, but not enough for Naomi to pull away.

“Are you gonna listen, or are you gonna act like a baby?” asked Levitan, their voice low and menacing.

She nodded, biting her lower lip.

“Yes,  _ what? _ ” they snapped.

“I’m gonna listen, okay?! Let me go!”

Levitan released her hand. Naomi stepped away, her arms curled protectively over her chest. A red mark encircled her wrist.

“Apologize to Akio,” they said, pointing to him. “Say sorry for callin’ him a “boytoy” and for sayin’ he ain’t worth my time.”

“But-”

“ _ Say it. _ ”

Naomi sighed. “Akio, I’m sorry. I don’t blame you for this, and I’m glad you’re safe.”

Akio flicked a speck of dust on the table. “It’s fine, I understand where you’re coming from.”

“The second thing you’re gonna do,” said Levitan, “Is go to bed. We can discuss things in the morning.”

Naomi looked like she was thinking about arguing, but she turned away instead. “Fine. We’ll fight more in the morning. This isn’t over, there’s still some stuff I wanna yell at you about. C’mon, Hawke, let’s catch some more shuteye.”

Before following Naomi from the room, Hawke shot Levitan a chilling look. Levitan met his gaze evenly, willing to take what he was ready to throw at them.

He was quiet for a moment, as if mulling things over.

“Don’t do that again,” he said. “If you hurt her, we’re gonna have a problem.” He turned and followed Naomi back upstairs.

James groaned as he pushed his chair away from the table and stood. “Was that  _ really  _ necessary?”

“Not really,” said Levitan. They didn’t meet his gaze. “Sorry. She can’t do that, though.”

“Do what? Question your authority?”

“No, put more value on my life than on the lives of other mutants,” they said, picking at the lint on the sleeve of their sweater. “It ain’t right.”

“In an ideal world,” said James, “You’d be correct. We can’t measure the value of lives, but… this is a war. You’re an experienced soldier, you’re knowledgeable and skilled. You’re strong, you’re a leader, and your life determines the lives of many others. You just… have to be more careful.”

“I… I understand what you mean.” Levitan walked back over to Akio. “Can I touch you?” they asked him.

Akio nodded. He held his empty mug in his hands.

Levitan put a heavy hand on his shoulder and looked back over at James. “I guess my point is that I don’t regret my decision. Akio is valuable, too. Don’t forget that.”

“I won’t,” said James. “I  _ didn’t.  _ I’m glad you’re safe, Akio. I’m talking with some of the other mutants who just left Monsoon tomorrow, you can join us if you like. I can help you cope with what you’ve been through.”

“I’ll think about it,” he said. “Thanks.”

James gave a nod before he left the kitchen.

Levitan sank back into the chair, their hands over their face. “Fuck. I’m so sorry ‘bout them, Akio. You must feel like shit.”

“I didn’t expect anything different,” he said. He pushed his mug aside and put his hand on Levitan’s thigh. “I owe you so much.”

Levitan lowered their hands and smiled. “You look pretty roughed up, darlin’.” They brushed their thumb over his cheek. “Wanna get cleaned up and into some better clothes?”

“You read my mind.”

Akio let Levitan guide him upstairs and into the bathroom, toting the bag Levitan had taken with them. They pulled out some pyjamas for Akio and handed them to him.

“Go shower,” they said. “These oughta be nicer than that shit you’re wearin’. We can go burn it, tomorrow.”

“Can you stay with me?” he asked quietly, hugging the new clothes to his chest. “J-just into the bathroom. I don’t wanna be alone.”

“Yeah, okay,” they said. They dropped the bag onto the floor, shut the door behind them, and took a seat on the closed toilet. “Want me to look away?”

“I don’t mind either way,” he said truthfully.

Levitan let their head tilt back, crossed their legs, and closed their eyes. “Want me to talk to you?”

Akio stripped off his jumpsuit and kicked it away. “That would be nice.” He missed their voice. Right now, their tone was low and comforting, and it soothed him a great deal.

“Anythin’ in particular you wanna hear about?” they asked as Akio turned the shower on.

He held out his hand into the stream to test the temperature. “No. Anything is fine with me.”

“I could tell you a story.”

“I’d like that.” He climbed into the shower and drew the curtain shut.

When the curtain closed, Levitan opened their eyes to look up at the ceiling. “Lessee… how ‘bout somethin’ from when I was a kid? It was a different time period, I grew up ‘round the turn of the twentieth century, y’know.”

Akio chuckled. He stood under the water and rubbed his hands through his hair. The showers at Monsoon were ice cold, few and far between. “I can’t picture you as a kid in the late Victorian era.”

“I didn’t look all that great,” they said. “I was sick a lotta the time, kinda scrawny and weak. Anyways, so there was one time when I was ‘bout eleven years old when I fancied myself an explorer, y’know? I explored  _ everythin’.  _ Family farm was on the edge o’ this lake, and I decided to try and row my way across it. It didn’t end all that well, for me. Pa didn’t care for that uppity shit one bit. Got my skirts all dirty from fallin’ in the mud on the shoreline.”

Akio tried to picture Levitan in a dress and he just couldn’t. He washed behind his ears.

“I decided to try an’ explore my church durin’ Sunday school,” they said. “It wasn’t all that big, so as you can imagine there wasn’t really all that much to find. Durin’ lunch one time, I noticed that there was a ladder tucked away behind the altar that led up. I slipped away when the Pastor wasn’t lookin’, and I crept up into the attic.”

Akio lathered shampoo into his hair. He was still trying to process the idea of Levitan being a  _ child  _ who used to wear  _ dresses _ . It sounded so alien, to him.

“It wasn’t all that interesting, if I recall correctly,” said Levitan with a smile. “Found some old boxes of papers, some broken candles, and an old mousetrap that I accidentally snapped on the tip of my finger. I poked around through the old things, found an old copy o’ “ _ The Book of Revelations _ ” and spent my time flippin’ through the gory old drawings. It was entertaining.”

Akio rinsed his hair, watching the suds go down the drain. Levitan’s voice was so soothing.

“Anyhow, the church bell rang, and the kids came in from lunch. Now, I  _ hated  _ Sunday school. Seemed like a perfectly good waste o’ a weekend to me, but my parents were Catholic so they got right on my case if I didn’t go. I decided to stay up in the attic for a little bit of respite from sermons.”

“How did  _ that  _ go?” he asked as he rubbed soap over his body, working into all the neglected cracks. It felt so good to shower without anybody staring at him.

“Well, the Pastor tried to find me, o’ course. I heard him comin’ up the steps, so I decided to slip out out of the attic and make my way through the rafters, where he wouldn’t be able to see me.”

“Uh-oh.”

“Uh-oh is right,” they said. “It worked out okay for the first bit. I tiptoed along the beam, and that was all fine an’ good, but I wasn’t that strong of a kid. My hands shook when I tried to hold ‘em steady, y’know? I didn’t have the best sense of balance. One of my feet slipped, and I fell from the rafters. It was a  _ long  _ way down, god maybe fifteen or twenty feet? I landed right on top of two boys so I didn’t break nothin’ and I got away with a few bumps and bruises and a sprained ankle.”

“Holy crap.”

Levitan chuckled. “The class erupted into chaos. The Pastor couldn’t calm the lot of us down to save his life. After that, half the kids in the class tried to climb into the rafters at least a dozen times over the next few months. The Pastor couldn’t catch me so I managed to duck the switch for awhile, but my folks heard ‘bout it and I got my ass beat for pullin’ such a stunt.”

Akio laughed. He switched off the shower and pulled the curtain aside to peek out of it. “Oh my god. That’s hilarious.”

“Yep,” said Levitan with a chuckle. They stood and wrapped a towel around his shoulders. They wiped the water from his cheek with the cloth. “It was pretty dang funny, if I do say so myself.”

Akio stood on tiptoe and kissed their cheek. He grinned as colour filled Levitan’s face. He hastily towelled off and pulled on the fleece pyjamas Levitan had gotten for him. They were red and plaid, and just a little bit big on him, but they were just perfect and soft on his body.

“Do you wanna sleep with me, or alone?” asked Levitan. “Either one is fine, I won’t be offended.”

“I don’t really wanna be alone,” he admitted.

“In that case,” they said, kicking his jumpsuit aside and draping a protective arm over his shoulders. “I can keep you warm, tonight.”

Levitan guided him into their bedroom and dropped the bag on the floor before kicking the door shut behind them and flicking on the lamp. It was a small room, with nothing but a bed and several bookcases crammed with everything from kids cardboard books to the Encyclopedia Galactica. There was a small window that let in the moonlight.

Levitan didn’t hesitate in dropping their cargo pants and changing into a clean pair of boxers and a fresh tank t-shirt to sleep in. Akio ate them up with his eyes, trying to memorize the details of their body and map out the scars that patterned their skin

“Jeez,” said Akio, climbing onto the bed. The sheets were worn, but the comforter was still soft and warm. “If you sleep in shorts in winter, what do you sleep in during summer?”

“Usually nothin’ at all,” they said with a teasing smile. 

They crawled into the bed next to him, but kept distant. They wanted to give him enough space. They didn’t know what he’d be ready for, and what he could handle. Different people have different reactions to trauma, they didn’t wanna overstep his boundaries.

Akio dimmed the light so it was a soft glow over the cluttered little room. “I feel really… safe.”

“Good. I’m glad.” Levitan smiled at him. “You’re so sweet. You deserve better than what you got.”

“So do you,” he said bashfully.

Levitan couldn’t tear their eyes away from his mouth. He had such nice lips, they were soft and pink and felt so good against theirs. They couldn’t resist asking, “Akio, can I kiss you?”

“I love it when you ask me that,” said Akio with a silly grin. “Please kiss me, Lev.”

Levitan didn’t hesitate in pressing their lips together. Akio let out a slightly surprised noise that turned into a pleased moan as they deepened the kiss. He wrapped his arms around their shoulders, gripping the fabric of their t-shirt in his fingers as they shifted so they were positioned over him. They put their elbows on the pillow beside his head and rested just a little bit of their body weight on him, enough to keep him grounded and make him feel warm and safe.

The kiss was passionate, full of leftover adrenaline and resurfacing affection. Akio nipped at Levitan’s lip, which made them gasp against his mouth in surprise. They reached their hand down and popped the top few buttons on his flannel shirt.

“Is this okay?” they asked, their mouth touching the shell of his ear.

“Y-yes,” he stammered. He felt hot all over he wanted Levitan to kiss him more.

Levitan lowered their mouth to his neck and pressed slightly rough kisses to his skin, using just a hint of teeth. They unbuttoned his shirt the rest of the way and spread the halves. They sat back on their heels so they could look at him.

“Fuck, you’re so gorgeous,” they murmured, although they disliked the fact that they could make out his ribs. 

“So’re you,” said Akio. His pulse was galloping. Nobody had ever called him  _ gorgeous  _ before, not in that slightly husky voice, low with want, as they kissed him all over and made him feel like the most important man in the world.

Levitan kissed him again, their hands resting on his chest. Akio was dizzy with adrenaline, he slid his hands up the front of their shirt so he could touch their  _ abs,  _ which is something he’d been daydreaming about for a long time.

“Stop me if I do somethin’ you don’t like, okay?” said Levitan when they pulled away for air.

“Mmhmm,” he said, wondering how far they planned on going. He felt a little bit hesitant, but he also felt anticipation.

Levitan kissed the other side of his neck, leaving bite marks that would fade within a few minutes, anyway. “I missed you. I missed you a lot.”

“I missed you too,” he said. “How long was I in there?”

“A little over a week, closer to two.” Levitan kissed his clavicle. “You drive me crazy, baby. I wanna make you feel good.”

“You already do,” he said, gripping their shirt with both fists.

They kissed down his chest and looked up at him. Their silver eyes shone in the soft lamplight. “I’m gonna take care o’ you, darlin’. I’m gonna do that in any way that I can. Okay?”

Akio nodded. He felt overwhelmed with gratitude.

Levitan kissed down his stomach, to below his navel. Their hand slid between his legs and fondled him. “Want me to suck your dick, baby? Take your mind offa things?”

Akio wasn’t expecting that. He suddenly felt really vulnerable, like he was tied down and rendered helpless, and he didn’t like that feeling. Flashbacks of cold tables and parts of him being severed away filled his mind, and before he could stop himself he shuddered and squirmed away.

Levitan sat back, eyes wide. “Shit. I should’a asked. Was that too much?”

Akio nodded. He couldn’t find the words.

Levitan let out a sympathetic noise. “Darlin’ I’m sorry. I wanna make you feel good, I don’t want you to feel like this. Maybe that’s enough for tonight.”

“I-I’m sorry,” he stuttered out, hating how his voice shook. He hastily buttoned up his shirt, hands shaking slightly. “I-I’m sure that sex is really important to you, I just can’t give you that right now. I’m sorry.”

Levitan shook their head. They laid back down next to Akio, feet resting against his under the comforter. “It ain’t all that important to me, pint-sized. Don’t fret your pretty lil’ head ‘bout it.” They caressed his cheek lightly. “What gave you that idea?”

“Well,” he said slowly, “Isn’t that why we’re doing this… whatever this is? Naomi called me your “boytoy”, and that’s sorta true, isn’t it? I mean, I’m not much, I’m sure you could get anybody you wanted, but-”

“Shh.” Levitan pressed a finger to his lips. “You worry too much. Fuck Naomi, you ain’t a “boytoy”. I  _ like  _ you, pint-sized, warts n’ all. I just pray you feel the same way about my warts. I don’t care if all we do is cuddle an’ play footsie. I like bein’ with you, okay?”

“Really?” he asked, feeling a wave of mixed happiness and relief wash over him. 

“I mean it,” they said. “Don’t let me do anything to you that you don’t want, okay? Your comfort, happiness and safety are my priorities, not my sex drive.”

“It’s been awhile for you, hasn’t it?” he asked.

Levitan huffed. “Don’t remind me. I haven’t even fucked  _ myself  _ in five years.”

“Jeez. Well, if it’s been that long, don’t you want me to…?”

“Don’t do that for me,” said Levitan firmly. “It ain’t worth it. I got two hands and a hot bath, now. I can take care o’ myself, if need be.” They kissed his forehead. “When and if you’re ready, we can do those things.”

“W-what kind of things?” he asked. He didn’t want to be touched, but he did want to think about being touched, someday in the future.

Levitan smiled slyly. “I’d suck your dick. I’d fuck you into the mattress. I’ve always had a thing for topping, so maybe I could get my hands on a harness and make you take my cock if you’d be into that.”

Akio had never considered pegging. He didn’t really understand the appeal of it, but maybe he could try it. He gave a shy smile. “That would be nice, someday. I like you, Lev. I wanna do that with you, just…”

“Not now,” they said. “Trust me, I’ve been there. We’ll take it nice n’ slow. We might get there soon, or we might get there years from now. We don’t ever have to get there at all, if you don’t want. No pressure at all, okay?”

“Okay.” He leaned in and gave them a soft kiss. Levitan kissed him back, but kept it chaste and noninvasive.

“Tell you what,” they said. “How ‘bout I let you pace things. You tell me what you want and when you want it. I’m willin’ to provide just about everything for you, darlin’. Whenever we get to sex, it’ll be because it was your idea, okay?”

“Thank you,” he said. “I feel… a lot better.” He couldn’t really believe that  _ Levitan Reeves  _ found him not only worth their time and safety, but worth their attention and affection with no future promise of sex. It made him feel warm inside, he wanted to devote himself to them.

They weren’t perfect. They had warts, like they said, but so did he. He loved their warts, too.

“Can we cuddle?” he asked. “I wanna sap your body heat.”

“Of course, darlin’. Wanna be the lil’ spoon?” they asked, holding their arms out.

Akio teared up. He tried his eyes on his wrists. “Thought I’d never get to hear you ask me that.”

“I’ll ask you every night,” they said, pulling him down into their arms.

Akio tucked himself up against Levitan so their chin was touching the top of his head, and closed his eyes. Their hand rested on his stomach, and he put his hand over it to hold them in place. It was perfect and intimate, and he felt safe in their arms. Nothing in the world could get at him as long as he was being held by Levitan.

Levitan fell asleep within a few minutes. It took Akio a little bit longer, he’d managed to rest on the drive over. Nevertheless, he also drifted off, Levitan’s soft snores lulling him to sleep.

He did have nightmares about white walls and bloodied sawblades, but this time they were mixed into dreams about snowy nights and the feeling of Levitan’s body pressed against his under the covers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woohoo! Still at it! Comments give me life please and thank


	7. Trying to Understand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan's having a rough time wrapping his head around Levitan, lately. He's starting to have a tough time understanding Dana, too... but for different reasons.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: super brief mentions of torture, BAD COMMUNICATION SKILLS

Ryan woke late. The sun streamed through the window and illuminated the dust particles that hovered in the air in the living room. He was warm by his spot next to the chimney. He sat up from his pile of blankets and discovered that he was alone. The others were gone.

A burst of laughter came from the other room. Spoons clinked against dishes and the whistle of a kettle boiling also met his ears. Ryan got to his feet and shuffled into the kitchen to see what was happening.

Everyone was crowded around the large table. Levitan sat at the head, with an empty spot on their right and Akio on their left. He looked groggy, and Levitan appeared to be speaking to him in a voice quiet enough that only he could hear.

Dana waved to him. Tanner sat at her elbow, between the twins. “Hey, there’s the sleepyhead! Nice to see you!”

“What time is it?” Ryan asked. He suddenly felt self-conscious as Dana stared at him and reached up to flatten his hair which he knew must be sticking out at a weird angle from sleeping.

“Nine thirty,” said James, checking his watch. None of his eyes were pointing in the same direction, and they were all blinking at odd times. “How’d you sleep?”

“Good.” Ryan slipped past Hawke who was leaning against the counter eating toast, and pulled the milk from the fridge.

He fixed his cereal and glanced over at Levitan. They had their hand on Akio’s arm.

He didn’t like it. He didn’t like how Levitan had left the group to go get him. Akio was just some two-bit mutant who used to work for  _ Monsoon,  _ why did  _ he  _ deserve a private rescue mission? Akio was an okay guy but what if Levitan had been captured? All of his hard work breaking them out in the first place would have been for nothing, and he’d be back to square one.

He had nothing against Akio, but he resented him. He resented him for taking Levitan away, in more ways than one. He was worried that he was encroaching in on Levitan’s life so there was less of them for Ryan.

He knew those fears were corny, but he couldn’t help it. They were there all the same.

Ryan’s hands shook as he carried the cereal bowl over to the table. He sat between Dana and Levitan.

He felt Dana’s eyes on him and self-consciously tried to flatten his hair out. He glanced over at her. She wore a sweet smile on her muzzle. Her raven black hair was braided over her shoulder.

“Want me to fix that?” she asked.

“Uh,” he said.

Dana pulled a hair elastic from her wrist, combed his hair back, and twisted the longest part of his hair into a ponytail. His bangs still got in his eyes, but she pushed them out of the way for him. Her blunt claws felt nice on his scalp. Comforting.

“How’s that?” she asked with a smile. Her golden eyes were playful, and her grin showed slightly pointed teeth.

“Good,” he said. “Thanks, Dana.”

Their knees touched under the table. He didn’t pull away.

“How’d you sleep, son?” asked Levitan. They had the paper in front of them and a cup of coffee in one hand. Their other hand was still on Akio’s forearm.

Ryan scowled.

“What’s the face for?” asked Levitan, giving him a look.

“Nothin’.” He stabbed viciously at his cereal.

“Squirt, those cornflakes didn’t do nothin’ to you, no need to take your anger out on ‘em,” said Levitan. “What’s on your mind?”

“... I’m glad you’re back,” he said, not sounding too glad. “But… why’d you have to go?”

Levitan reached up and affectionately ruffled Akio’s hair. “You know why.”

“You didn’t even say goodbye,” he muttered, trying to keep the bitterness from his voice. He took a few bites of cereal, even though he wasn’t really hungry, and forced himself to swallow.

Levitan sighed, and turned their full attention to Ryan. “I’m sorry. I should’a said somethin’ before taking off like that.”

“Yeah, you should have,” he said tartly, keeping his voice low so as not to draw the entire table’s attention to his conversation. “You also should’a apologized for being a  _ dick  _ since we left LA, you should’a formed a proper  _ plan  _ for gettin’ him out instead of just taking off willy-nilly! Oh, and you should’a hidden that bottle of whisky better when we were in Ohio.”

Levitan winced. They’d been found out. “Oh.”

“You stole liquor and got drunk alone,” he said, jabbing at his cereal again and breaking the flakes into tiny pieces. “I saw you. You didn’t see me.”

Levitan rubbed their eyes with their fingers. “Fuck. I didn’t want you to see that.”

“Yeah, well… I didn’t wanna see that, either.”

Levitan gave a small sigh. Their shoulders slumped. “Do you… wanna go out for a drive? We gotta get some more clothes for Akio and some more food for everybody. Want in on it?” They looked a little hopeful. “Might be nice to get outta the base for a bit.”

Ryan glared down at his cornflakes. He mulled the idea over for a bit.

Levitan waited expectantly. Their gaze was unwavering.

“Yeah, I guess.” He picked up his cereal bowl and knocked it back in one swallow. Milk dribbled down his chin, he set the bowl down and wiped his face on his wrist. “Lemme get dressed.”

“Alright. Meet you by the door in ten minutes.”

“Okay, sure.”

Ryan got up from the table, glancing back at Dana, who was absorbed in a book she was reading. He tore his gaze away, dropped his bowl in the dishwasher, and jogged up to the bathroom with a bundle of clothes under his arm to change.

When he got a look at himself in the mirror, he decided that he looked pretty good with his hair tied back. It made him look a little more put together. He liked it a lot.

He hopped back down the stairs to the kitchen and stopped by the door.

Levitan stood by the front door, holding Akio’s face in their hands. He didn’t look too happy, borderline tearful. Ryan watched as they pushed his glasses up onto his forehead with two fingers, then kissed his cheek right by the bridge of his nose, under his eye.

Akio smiled and chuckled.

Ryan frowned. He stomped up to Levitan, his hands jammed deep into the pockets of his rain jacket. “We ready?”

“Get your shoes on and we will be,” said Levitan. “Do you got good winter shoes, or do I gotta get you some?”

Ryan was currently sporting a pair of converse all-stars. He shrugged.

“Right.” Levitan ruffled Akio’s hair. “Back soon, darlin’.”

Ryan made a bit of a face at the nickname as he walked past to put his shoes on. He pulled his converse on his feet and left the laces untied while Levitan tightened the ties on their combat boots.

It was bitterly cold, but Ryan refused to wear gloves or anything more than a hoodie and a raincoat. He followed Levitan out to the car, stepping carefully so he didn’t get snow in his shoes.

He climbed into the car. Levitan slid into the driver’s side, turned on the engine, and turned up the heater. “Brr. We could store popsicles in here.”

“Mmhmm,” he said, folding his arms.

“Now that we’re on our own,” said Levitan as they backed the car out of the spot. “Mind tellin’ me what’s eatin’ ya?” They turned the car around and drove down the bumpy little road, back to the highway.

“Well,” said Ryan slowly, “I dunno. You’re not gonna like what I have to say.”

“I don’t gotta  _ like  _ it,” they said. The car bounced on its shocks, the wheels skidded a bit on the snow. “I just wanna  _ know. _ ”

“Okay, your funeral.” Ryan folded his arms and put his feet up on the dash, near the heaters. “I’m mad that you left without sayin’ nothin’. I’m pissed off that you went and did that  _ stupid  _ shit.”

“What stupid shit?” they asked testily.

“Bustin’ him out!” he said, waving his hand emphatically.

“You don’t think he’s worth it.”

“Look, I got no problem with Akio, he’s a decent guy to be ‘round, but he’s no  _ you. _ ” He massaged his knees. “I dedicated an entire year of planning and prep to bust you outta Monsoon, and you wanted to… to… throw it all away for  _ him. _ ”

“I wasn’t throwin’ nothin’ away,” they protested. They spun the wheel and turned off onto the highway. “I just wanted him back.”

“ _ Why? _ ” he asked.

“He’s my  _ friend. _ ”

“Duh, but he’s worth your safety?  _ Our  _ safety?”

Levitan glanced at him out of the corner of their eye. “... I can’t explain it.”

Ryan decided to cut to the chase. “He likes you. I told him not to hurt you, back in LA.”

Levitan huffed a sigh. “For real? That’s not your job, kiddo.  _ My  _ job is to protect  _ you. _ ”

Ryan lowered his voice and muttered through his teeth, hoping they wouldn’t hear him, “ _ You’ve done a shitty job of it, lately. _ ”

A flash of anger came over Levitan’s features, then it disappeared and was replaced with a controlled calm. “Well, I’m  _ goddamn sorry _ that I was being  _ tortured  _ in Monsoon for five fucking years! Do you not think that I would give  _ anything  _ to have been with you, instead?”

“Then  _ I’m  _ sorry for wasting all that time bustin’ you out when you were  _ so fuckin’ eager  _ to go right back there to rescue your  _ boyfriend! _ ” he snapped.

Levitan growled. Their fingers dented the steering wheel. “Listen here, you lil’  _ shit. _ I didn’t want you anywhere  _ near  _ that place. I ain’t ‘bout to be  _ ungrateful  _ or nothin’, but if you  _ ever  _ try to pull a harebrained stunt like that again, I’m gonna find you and you’re gonna dig your own grave!”

“You would have  _ preferred to stay in Monsoon? _ ” he asked incredulously.

“ _ I’m not about to let my only son get captured by those rat-faced bastards! _ ” they shouted. They took a breath and relaxed their grip on the steering wheel. “If I can’t protect you, I can’t do nothin’.”

“Do you feel that way about Akio, too?” he asked tentatively.

Levitan gave him a sidelong glance. “Uh, I’d prefer not to equate how I feel ‘bout him to the relationship I got with you, okay?”

“Oh. So you don’t feel…  _ paternal  _ towards him in any way?”

“Jesus, son, what gave you that idea?” they asked, slightly horrified. “Judging by the amount of makin’ out we were doin’ last night, I’d say  _ definitely not. _ ”

“Ew,” he said.

“Why’d you ask the question if you didn’t want an answer like that?”

“Just making sure,” he said hastily. “Naomi called him your “boy toy”.”

Levitan growled. “Fuck her. It ain’t  _ like  _ that.”

“You never had any partners or relationships when I was a kid,” he said slowly.

“Nope,” they said. They passed a sign that said they were ten miles from the nearest town.

“Why not?” he asked.

“Just didn’t meet anybody. Y’know how it is.” They raised an eyebrow. “Why’re you so interested in my love life, all of a sudden?”

“No reason.”

“I ain’t no expert, but I think the fine points of how Akio and I treat each other are more my business than yours.”

“Yeesh, I don’t wanna know all the details,” he said, waving a hand. “I’m not about to imagine you having  _ sex,  _ thanks.”

“Are you askin’ these questions ‘cause there’s somebody on  _ your  _ mind?” they asked with a slight teasing tone. It was obvious they were trying to turn the attention away from themself, but Ryan let it slide.

“What? Ew. No.” Ryan folded his arms. “We’re done this discussion.”

“I dunno,” they said with humourous skepticism in their voice. “You seem to hang around  _ Dana  _ a whole lot.”

“ _ What?  _ Lev, we’re  _ just friends _ .”

“Okay, alright, I won’t bother you ‘bout it.” Levitan couldn’t keep the smile off of their face. “I’ve missed the first half of your teen years, I never got to tease you ‘bout crushes before this.”

“I don’t have a  _ crush. _ ”

“I didn’t say you did,” they replied. They hit the turning signal as they turned off the highway, into town.

Ryan pouted. He might have preferred it when Lev wasn’t talking to him.

 

Ryan followed behind Levitan in the grocery store. Their cart was completely filled to the top with toiletries, cleaning supplies, and food. He didn’t like how Lev compared his hands to the size of the rubber gloves they were buying.

He slipped a chocolate bar into his pocket while Levitan was paying for the groceries. They didn’t notice.

The drive back was quiet. Neither of them really spoke, until something that had been bothering Ryan finally bubbled back to the surface. He pulled out his chocolate bar, broke off a piece, and popped it into his mouth. 

Levitan saw him do that. They frowned. They didn’t remember buying candy.

“So,” said Ryan. “Am I gonna get an apology?”

“For what?” they asked tersely.

“For being a  _ dick, _ ” he muttered.

“You’re gonna have to be more specific, Squirt,” they said.

“For the  _ entire drive over from LA, _ ” said Ryan. “You snapped at us, you were sullen and surly, you went off by yourself and got shit-faced. I mean… what gives?”

“It’s complicated,” said Levitan, drumming their fingers on the wheel. They didn’t have the best coping strategies at the best of times, and Akio’s capture had hit them harder than they could have possibly predicted.

“You never said sorry.”

“I’ll say it now. I’m real sorry, Ryan. I ain’t ‘bout to make excuses for what I did, but I want you to know that I wasn’t actin’ that way for kicks.” Levitan let out a long sigh. “I knew this was gonna happen sooner or later.”

“What was?” he asked.

“... That you’d realize how fucked up I am,” they admitted. They hated feeling this vulnerable, they never wanted Ryan to see how much they hurt on the inside. “I’ve done things and had things done to me that have messed me up.  _ Permanently. _ Losing Akio brought back a lotta bad memories, Squirt. It brought down a whole lotta guilt on my head. I-I have a hard time dealin’ with some of the shit I’ve been through. I don’t know how to cope sometimes so I’ll just… not say anythin’, or act real mean, or grab a bottle.”

“... Oh,” he said.

“I hope you can understand,” they said. “I ain’t gonna ask you to forgive me, but… I hope you can see why I’m like this. I don’t do it for fun, and I didn’t get this way overnight. You get it?”

Ryan puffed out a breath. He still hadn’t forgiven them, and he wasn’t interested in them trying to explain away their actions. He was irked that they thought they could justify their shitty attitude, it was no excuse to act like a huge  _ dickhead. _

He popped another piece of chocolate into his mouth. 

Levitan noticed the angry expression on his face and their heart twisted. He didn’t understand. He didn’t know what it was like to be them, to shoulder the burden of buried memories and the guilt of things they’ve done.

Hopefully, he never would.

 

Ryan found a neat attic spot in the house. It was warm, small, and there was a little window that let the light come in. He dragged a few comic books, a pillow, a blanket, and some snacks up there to get some time alone. He wasn’t really in the mood to encounter Lev.

He could hear voices downstairs, namely James’s group session happening on the couches by the chimney, where Ryan and the other kids usually slept. The sounds were muffled, but he could barely make out Akio’s voice quietly talking about his last few days in Monsoon.

“... it grew back, and then they started on the other one. I-I didn’t get any anesthetic, they just p-put the saw against my arm and started to…”

Ryan could hear the fear in his voice. He could hear James talking in a soothing tone. He put the pillow over his head to block out their voices. He thumbed through his  _ Batman  _ comic and took a bite from his slightly melted chocolate bar.

Levitan’s voice drifted up to the attic. “... same things that happened to Akio, pretty much. I-I don’t wanna  _ burden  _ y’all with what’s happened to me or nothin’, but-”

“Lev,” said James, “It’s not a burden. Telling your story can help you deal with what’s happened, so you can start to move forward.”

Levitan coughed. They sounded clearly uncomfortable. Ryan crawled across the attic and peered down between the rafters through a gap in the floorboards.

Everyone else in the house was there. Everyone else had spent time in Monsoon. He was the only one who didn’t understand.

“Well,” said Levitan hesitantly. “I was there a lot longer. Five years, and then ten years back in the day… plus, y’know, when I was a kid. S’where it all started in the first place.”

Ryan hadn’t heard this story. He put his ear to the crack so he could hear better.

“Some o’ you can relate to this a bit,” they said. Their chair creaked as they leaned back in it. “I grew up outside o’ Austin. Farm country. My Pa raised cattle, an’ we never had much more n’ two pennies to rub together, and Monsoon was just a lil’ thing at the time. They posed as a group o’ family practitioners. My folks had no idea that instead o’ vitamin shots, I was gettin’ some kinda chemical concoction that stopped me from gettin’ older.” They sighed. “I look the same as I did the day I turned thirty… maybe even younger. ‘Course, the bags under my eyes age me a bit, hah.”

There were a few murmurs in the group, namely Naomi saying something about “valuable origin information”.

“Knock it off,” said James sharply, “this meeting isn’t about strategies, it’s about telling our stories and supporting one another through our experiences, whatever they might be. I haven’t been within the walls of Monsoon for over twenty years, but I still get nightmares that stop me from falling back asleep. I wasn’t  _ born  _ with all these eyes you know. I remember each and every one of them growing into place, and I’ll never forget the feeling of my skin splitting.”

“You mean…” said Dana’s voice softly. “It… the fear, I mean… it never goes away?”

Ryan turned his head so he could look through the crack he was listening through. Dana was directly below him. Her arms were wrapped around her folded legs, her chin resting on her knees. Tanner had one of his sticky little hands on her back.

James gave a sigh and uncrossed his legs. “Dana, I won’t sugarcoat it. Some things can happen to you that you’ll never forget, no matter how hard you try. Carrying those experiences with you doesn’t make you broken or weak, it’s just a part of who you are. You can choose to let them go and wash through you, or make them a part of you and use them to make yourself stronger. Just because terrible things happened to you in the past, it doesn’t mean that you can’t have a bright future, or that those experiences control you.”

Dana gave a small sigh. Ryan saw her pick at her claws. “If you say so, James. I mean… it’s been three years since Tanner and I have been in Monsoon, but they’re such a big part of our lives… No matter how much time passes, we’re always going to be reminded of them, aren’t we? I mean, look at Levitan.”

“Why me?” they asked, with a note of alarm in their voice.

“Monsoon’s been a part of your life for a hundred years,” said Dana. “Does it… ever get better?”

There was a hush in the room as every mutant in there waited expectantly for their answer.

“Yes,” they said, eventually. “It does. It gets easier. Some mutants band together and forget about the resistance. Before I was captured, I knew at least a dozen folks who’d gotten their lives together and moved past Monsoon completely.”

“Really?” asked Dana.

“Yeah, really.” They gave a sigh. “I’ll admit, when I attempted to abandon the revolutionary life, it worked out for about… ten years. It ended abruptly when I was recaptured. But I’m not like you guys. Monsoon has it out for me, specifically.” They hesitated before saying, “I’m a bit of a trophy, for them.”

“You’re not a trophy, Lev,” said James.

“Thanks,” they said gruffly.

“Would you like to continue with your story?” asked James.

“I, um,” they said hesitantly. “Maybe I oughta give someone else a turn.”

“Alright,” he said. “I don’t want you to feel pressured to reveal more than you’re comfortable with. Naomi, would you like-”

Ryan crawled away from the crack. He winced as the floorboards squeaked under his weight. He rolled himself up in the blankets with his comic book and pointedly ignored the rest of the meeting.

 

The meeting dispersed, but Ryan still stayed up in the attic. It was cozy, and through the tiny round window he could see the nearby snow-covered field and trees. He had a pile of comics and half a bag of chips left, so he didn’t see any reason to move. He figured that if Levitan caught him, he’d be forced to clean something.

Better to stay put.

“Hey.”

Ryan gave a less-than-manly squeak and turned. Dana had climbed the ladder up to the attic to join him. She was wearing a skirt, leggings, a warm sweater, and an amused smile.

Ryan flushed red with embarrassment and deepened his voice comically. “ _ Aah. _ You startled me, milady.”

Dana laughed. She was carrying her own blanket. She crawled over and sat next to him, wrapping her blanket around her shoulders. “I saw you come up here a while ago. Alright if I join you?”

“Yeah,” he said. “Want a comic?”

“I’d rather just hang out with you.”

“Oh,” he said.

“Yeah,” she said.

Ryan felt a little flustered by that comment. “Well, um. How did the meeting thing go?”

Dana gave a small sigh. “Talking about stuff like that always helps. It also feels good to listen to other people and support them and what they’ve been through. Why didn’t you go?”

“I haven’t been in Monsoon,” he said lamely.

“It’s a meeting for mutants,” she said. “You can talk about anything you like, Monsoon is just… a popular topic.”

They were quiet for a minute. Ryan looked out the window. Snow had begun to fall, again.

Ryan looked back over at Dana. “Wanna talk about something else?”

“Definitely,” she said, relieved. “Like what?”

“Jeez, I dunno.” He crossed his legs and pulled the blanket around his shoulders. “Sorry, I’ve been in a shit mood all day.”

“Aw, why?” she asked. Concern showed in her large golden eyes.

“I have such mixed feelings about Lev,” said Ryan, gripping the blanket. “I mean, they’re a good person… right?”

Dana gave a small sigh. “I think they are, but they’re not perfect. They make bad choices, sometimes.”

“You can say that again.”

“Everyone’s pretty mad at them for going after Akio,” she said. “Maybe you of all people should  _ sympathize. _ ”

“What? Why?” he asked defensively.

“You did the same thing for them,” she said. “Lev cares a lot about Akio. You care a lot about them, and they love you too. You went after them and they never gave you flak for it, so you should let them-”

“They  _ did  _ give me flak,” he said. “They didn’t want me near that place.”

“They’re your  _ parent _ ,” said Dana. “It’s natural that they want to protect you at a detriment to themself. In any case, maybe try to understand them a little bit better. They felt responsible for Akio getting captured, and they wanted to fix things. Maybe you should try to see from their point of view.”

“Right, yeah. I guess I should try.” He sighed. “It’s just… hard.”

“Of course it is,” said Dana. “Last time you saw Lev, you were ten years old. You just went through five years worth of the “ _ disillusionment of your parent’s perfection _ ” thing in like two weeks. You gotta give it time. You’re not perfect, and neither are they. We’re only mutant, after all.” She chuckled at her own joke.

Ryan gave a smile. “You’re right. Maybe I’m bein’ hard on them.”

“Just a tiny bit,” she said, indicating the small distance with her thumb and forefinger, her claws less than an inch apart.

“How should I make it up to them?” he asked.

“Talk to them, and don’t be a dick.”

“Right. Okay.” He sighed and decided to let it go for awhile. “What did y’all do with the rest o’ your day?”

Dana giggled.

“What?” he asked, feeling a little caught off guard.

“Your accent’s really cute,” she said.

“Oh, uh,” he said, unsure what to do. “Thanks? Kinda makes me sound like a hick.”

“A cute hick.”

“Oh! Well, uh, thanks.” He laughed nervously.

“Sorry,” said Dana, picking up his anxious tone. “Too much?”

“Uh, no! No, not at all,” he said hastily. “I, uh, wow. You’re really nice.” His voice cracked, oh god, he was bad at this.

Dana chuckled. “I wouldn’t mind reading some comics, now,” she said. “Pass me one?”

“Sure, here,” he said, passing her a  _ Spiderman  _ issue that he’d dug up from the basement.

Dana took it, opened it delicately with her blunt claws, and began to read.

Ryan lay down on his stomach with his comic, and Dana mimicked his position. Their elbows touched. He could hear chatter from downstairs and the whistling of the wind from outside. He glanced over at Dana when she laughed at a part in the comic, and noticed that her eyes had so many different shades layered into them. They were entrancing to look at.

He hurriedly looked back to his comic before she noticed.

Ryan wasn’t sure why, but he liked this a whole lot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, thanks for reading! I'm gonna be uploading Monsoon on Fictionpress because... this is a fanfic website........ so yeah! runaway-toons on there, too!


	8. Hot Cocoa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Akio and Lev get firewood and have a good conversation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: an allusion to sexual assault/abuse (vague, non-descriptive), hinted body dysphoria. A bit of a filler chapter, in all honesty.

The next few weeks were quiet around the base. November slipped seamlessly into December. The holidays approached, and the lingering tension from Akio’s rescue and the Los Angeles escape finally dissipated. The temperature outside dropped, and the snow encrusted the cars outside to the point where Levitan and Hawke had to go out and chip the ice off before anybody could drive anywhere. Every mutant was equipped with full winter gear, either pilfered from a nearby Target or bought honestly from the local thrift shop.

Akio felt better. As time passed, the memories faded a little. He got caught up in the slightly chaotic energy of the mishmash of mutants that had somehow become his family. He cuddled with Levitan every night, and whenever a nightmare came, they would hold him to their chest and comb their fingers through his hair until he fell back asleep.

They didn’t have much, but this was the most Akio had ever had in his life.

In an effort to be less clinging towards Levitan, he ended up becoming good friends with Eric, an albino mutant who was extremely suggestible and prone to involuntarily following directions if someone shouted them at him, and Julie, whose strange patchy skin consisted of fur, feathers, and scales. They were decent people, fun to play cards with.

It was another cold day. Akio pulled the sled as he walked with Levitan, who was carrying a chainsaw and trying to pick out the best tree to fell for firewood. They were wearing a thick fleece shirt and gloves, but they still bore their cargo pants and combat boots. They hadn’t found a replacement for the leather jacket,  yet. 

Akio’s boots sank into the deep snow as he struggled to keep up. His fingers were still cold despite the mittens he wore, and the tip of his nose stung from the chilly air.

“Alright there, pint-sized?” asked Levitan. They walked through the snow with ease with their long legs.

“I’m fine,” he said, panting slightly. “There was no snow where I grew up, at least not like this.”

Levitan chuckled. They walked up to a tree and tapped their knuckles against it. It wasn’t too tall, but it looked big enough around. “This one looks good. Might take us two trips to get all the wood back to the house.” They whistled at they examined it. “Wonder if I could make anythin’ nice outta this.”

“You carve?”

“I can build stuff, too.” They pulled off their gloves and shoved them into their pockets. “Nothin’ techy like Ryan or mechanical like Naomi. Just good ol’ fashioned chairs an’ tables. Cover your ears, babe. Stand a ways back.”

Akio took a few steps back as Lev revved the chainsaw. They cursed under their breath, gave it a kick, then pulled the cord again.

It roared to life, shaking in their hands. They squinted their eyes as they made a large notch in the wood on one side of the tree, splinters of wood shooting out and covering the snow. The tree groaned, and Levitan stepped over to the other side to make a smaller notch. 

The tree tilted to one side. Levitan shut off the chainsaw and stepped quickly to the side as the tree fell, the wood popping and snapping as it crashed into the snow.

“There we go!” Levitan grinned and took the hatchet from their belt. “That’s gonna give us more than enough.”

The tree was fairly large. There was more than enough wood to give them something to burn, maybe something to carve, plus some extra.

“Y’know,” said Levitan, pinching the pine needles, “The top part o’ this would make a half decent Christmas tree, don’cha think?”

“Do mutants celebrate Christmas?” asked Akio.

“Varies.” They took up their chainsaw, made a quick cut, and took the top part of the pine tree for later before setting the machine down in the snow again. “Most folks I’ve met just like to celebrate holidays for the sake o’ havin’ somethin’ to celebrate, y’know? What about you?”

“I’m Shinto,” he said with a shrug. “I’m pretty casual about it, but every place I’ve ever lived in until now had a small altar. I did festival stuff for New Years and a few other things, but that was about it.”

“If you wouldn’t mind settlin’ for a small altar,” said Levitan as they chopped off some of the smaller branches on the tree trunk with their hatchet, “I could help you cobble one together in time for New Years.”

“You wouldn’t mind?”

“It would be a pleasure,” they reassured. “I’d love to learn all about it.”

Akio was touched. He didn’t expect Levitan to be interested in his religion. “Is there anything I could help  _ you  _ with?”

“How so?” they asked. “Well, to start with, can you help bundle up these sticks? Waste not, want not.”

“Of course,” he said with a laugh, pulling out a string to gather the small branches with. “But I meant religiously.”

“I was Catholic when I was a child,” they said, “but I don’t really subscribe to any faiths at the moment.”

“Are you an atheist?” he asked, curious.

“Well,” they said, dancing around the answer slightly. “I’ve just seen a whole lotta stuff in my lifetime. I just have a tough time believing that any sorta God could let all this bad shit happen.”

“I understand that,” said Akio.

“I’m not the only one of that opinion, amongst the mutants,” said Levitan. “But there are also other beliefs. There are some philosophies and stories that travel through the mutant groups.” They revved the chainsaw again and lopped the tree into a few blocks of wood to make it easier to carry. They shut off the saw and set it aside. “James told me he found community in Judaism, and it helps him get through the day to believe in retribution for the wicked. I guess it’s just a difference in opinion.”

“So you celebrate Christmas?”

“Yep.” They dropped a few blocks of wood onto the sled and strapped them down with a tarp so they wouldn’t roll away. “Mostly just ‘cause it’s nice to give presents to folks, spend time together, and drink eggnog and hot cocoa. Shit, I bought four bags of marshmallows for s’mores and cocoa.”

Akio chuckled and tied the bundle of branches down onto the sled as Levitan loaded on some more chunks of wood. “I didn’t know you had a sweet tooth.”

“It’s not  _ just  _ for me,” they said. “I plan to  _ share,  _ thanks. Ye of little faith.”

Akio smiled. “Of course.”

Levitan straightened up and popped their back with a groan. “Ouch.”

“Your face is all red,” said Akio.

“Pfft, so’s yours.” They grinned and put their gloves back on. “You look adorable.”

“So do you.”

“I’m manly as  _ fuck. _ ”

“You sure are, baby.” Akio stood on tiptoe for a kiss.

“Nuh-uh,” they said, pushing him back down onto his heels with a firm hand on his shoulder. “You never heard that old wives tale?”

“About what?” he asked, pouting.

“If you kiss someone when it’s cold out, your lips could freeze together,” they said, hefting the Christmas tree under their arm and picked up the chainsaw. “I swear by it, as someone who has more than once stuck their tongue to a pole durin’ winter.”

“That’s not true,” said Akio, then he did a double take. “Wait,  _ more  _ than once? Why didn’t you learn the first time?”

“First time I was dared,” said Levitan. “I think I was ten years old. Second time I was thirteen, and I won ten cents for doing that.”

Akio laughed and grabbed the sled. It was heavy, but he managed to pull it along at a decent clip, particularly as they headed down the slope back to the barn. “Wow. A whole ten cents.”

“Hey, it was ten cents more n’ I had at the beginning of the day,” they said with a grin.

Akio dodged a shower of pine needles as Levitan bumped the tree against him. “Ack, careful!”

“Sorry, pint-sized,” they said with a touch of humour in their voice. 

Akio giggled as he pulled the sled along. He followed Levitan into the wood shed and helped unload the blocks so they could dry out and be chopped later. They left the sled in there, locked the door, and Akio helped Levitan carry the tree into the house.

“I hope nobody objects to this tree,” said Levitan, as they opened the door.

“It’s a good tree.”

“We got nothin’ to decorate it with,” they said. They kicked off their boots, Akio stripped off his coat and they both hung up their clothes over the heater. They opened the door into the kitchen.

“What the heck is  _ that? _ ” came Naomi’s voice as soon as the pine tree poked through the door.

“Hello to you, too,” said Levitan. “We got a tree.”

“Is it that time of year, already?” asked James, looking up from his book. Some of his eyes were still trained on the pages.

“Yeah, it is. Christmas ain’t too far away.”

“Shoot,” said James. “Looks like I better drop into town to buy a menorah. Any preference?” he asked, looking to Hawke and Naomi.

“Functional,” said Hawke.

“Pretty,” said Naomi.

“Alright,” he said. He looked back to his book, one of his eyes staring at a weird stain on the wall.

“Our old menorah was nice,” she said, flicking at a pine needle that dropped onto the table as Levitan and Akio carried the tree past.

“There’s stuff we can mount it with in the basement,” said Levitan, leaning the tree against the wall. “Akio, mind clearin’ up a spot near the wall while I head downstairs?”

“Sure thing, Lev,” said Akio. “Can I get my kiss, now?”

Levitan chuckled, tilted Akio’s chin up, and dropped a peck on the corner of his mouth before turning and heading down the basement steps.

“Nice tree,” said Ryan, his feet kicked up onto the sofa.

“It’s pretty sweet,” said Akio. He pushed an armchair away from the wall that had a socket and cleared a space for the tree.

“What decorations do we have?” asked Dana.

“None.” Levitan hopped up the steps, holding a pot and spike to mount the tree on. “I could run into town and get some cheapo lights and baubles. Babe, help me get this up.”

“Sure.” Akio helped Levita spread a blanket on the floor in the corner and set up the tree, closing his eyes against the prickly needles. Once it was standing relatively straight, Levitan went to grab a jug to fill the mount with water.

Tanner clicked his tongue, and the twins Daniel and Dylan gave each other a look like they were sharing the same idea.

“Hey, Aki?” said Daniel. “Could  _ we  _ make decorations?”

Akio mulled the idea over, but before he could reply, Dylan turned to his twin and said, “He thinks its a good idea, but we should ask Levitan first.” Then he giggled.

“What’s so funny?” asked Akio, still not used to the Dylan being able to read his mind.

Dylan leaned in and whispered loudly in his twin’s ear, “ _ He’s thinking about Levitan’s butt! _ ”

Akio turned red and spluttered, wondering what  _ else  _ that poor kid saw in his mind. “H-hey! Stay outta my head!”

“Ew,” said Ryan, wrinkling his nose. “TMI, dude.”

“ _ I was keeping my thoughts to myself, thanks! _ ” he protested.

Levitan ruffled Akio’s hair as they walked back into the room with the jug of water for the tree. “It’s alright, babe. I like thinkin’ ‘bout your butt, too.”

“ _ Ew, _ ” said Ryan again.

Akio smiled, still red-faced, as Levitan filled the base of the tree with fresh water.

“Lev?” asked Dylan. “Can we make Christmas decorations?”

“I see no problem with that,” said Levitan with a smile. “I’ll pick up some stuff for y’all next time I’m in town.”

Dylan and Daniel bumped fists. Tanner clicked excitedly and Dana looked up at the ceiling, as if thinking about ideas for presents and decorations. Ryan picked at the lint on his socks.

“Are we gonna do presents?” asked Ryan.

“If y’all want,” said Levitan. “We don’t have much, but it might be worth spreadin’ a little bit of goodness in this great, wide world.”

He nodded, brow furrowed, as if thinking about it deeply.

Akio put his hand on Levitan’s lower back and tucked himself in close. Levitan put their arm around him without a second thought. He already knew exactly what he wanted to get them.

“Yeesh.” Naomi walked into the room, wearing a four-armed sweater with a dreidel on it that she’d fashioned for herself. “Get a room, you two.”

“I only have my hand on his shoulder, Naomi,” said Levitan. “Get your mind outta the gutter.”

Naomi gave a little snort. “As if your mind isn’t already there. I can  _ see  _ you undressing him with your eyes. Keep that shit for when you’re fucking his brains out in private, won’t you?”

Akio tensed a little in their arms, suddenly rigid against them. Levitan stepped away to give him space.

“That’s enough of that,” said Levitan. Their tone brokered no nonsense.

Naomi poked her tongue into her cheek and took a seat on the couch. Hawke and James drifted in from the kitchen and sat next to her. James had a book. As soon as Hawke sat on the couch, Naomi crawled into his lap and settled in so his chin was resting on top of her head.

“Someone needs attention,” said Hawke mildly, his good eye closed, his bionic eye shuttered.

“I  _ always  _ need attention,” said Naomi, closing her eyes as well.

“Get a room, you two,” said Levitan.

Naomi flipped the middle finger without opening her eyes. “Hawke and I aren’t knockin’ boots, dummy.”

“I never want to see a naked person in my entire life,” mumbled Hawke, eyes still closed. “Naomi and I are platonic.”

“Platonic partners,” she said, pulling his arms around her.

Akio didn’t really get it, but Levitan seemed to understand. They tucked their hands into their pockets and said to him, “Want some cocoa, darlin’?”

“That would be nice,” he said with relief.

“ _ Gay, _ ” mumbled Ryan from the couch.

“Son,” said Levitan as they walked from the room. “Eat a dick.”

“ _ Wish I could! _ ” he called back with slight bitterness.

“Not a mental image I needed,” said Levitan as they took a pot from the kitchen cupboard. “But I s’pose I brought that on myself.”

Akio sat down at the table. His expression was torn between upset and anxious. Something was clearly bothering him, Levitan could tell he wanted to talk about it. They didn’t press him.

“Naomi’s been a bit of a dick, lately,” said Levitan as they poured milk into the pot and set it on the stove. “Don’t take it to heart.”

“I won’t if you won’t.”

“Mm, I wanna smack her a lil’, but that seems like a bad idea.”

“Just a bit,” he said.

“You seemed really uncomfortable with what she said,” said Levitan. They shook the hot chocolate packet into the milk. They didn’t turn to face him when they spoke.

“Just a bit,” he said again, quieter this time

Levitan sighed and hung their head. They reluctantly turned to face him, looking guilty.

“I ain’t gonna lie,” they said. “I find you attractive, Akio. I think about you a lot, in more than just a simply  _ romantic  _ sense.”

“I think about you, too,” he said honestly. “Thinking about it is fine, kissing, necking, the occasional butt grope is fine… as long as I don’t have to do anything below the belt. I’m just… not ready.”

“Of course not. I’d never dream of pressurin’ you, darlin’.” They pulled a wooden spoon from the tin on the counter and stirred the chocolate mix into the milk. “I know how shitty that can feel.”

Akio sighed. He lowered his voice. “Can I tell you something?”

Levitan picked up on the hesitant tone in his voice immediately. “Anything, baby.”

“I, uh, didn’t really share all the stuff that happened at Monsoon at the meetings,” he said.

Levitan had known this was coming for awhile, it had just been a matter of  _ when _ . They steeled themselves against it. “I’m listening.”

Akio looked at his feet. “I mean… some of the experiments were really…  _ invasive _ . I-I felt dirty afterwards… and… I dunno.”

Akio saw Levitan’s shoulders visibly tense. “I see.”

He swallowed and hated how hard it was to speak. “Y-you probably know this, but some of the guards like to show off the fact that they can do  _ anything  _ to us, y’know? That they could do whatever they wanted, and that nobody would help us, protect us, or believe us if we said anything? I had the shit kicked out of me one time. A few times, I saw them doing… stuff… to the other mutants… Usually the more human-looking ones.”

Levitan’s breath shuddered. They were shaking.

“I had a close shave,” he said. “The buzzer that ordered us to get back into our cells went off before he could touch me.”

The spoon snapped in Levitan’s hand. They looked down at the broken spoon, a bit surprised at what they’d done. They’d known that this had likely happened to him, but they hadn’t counted on how  _ angry  _ hearing the slight broken note in his voice made them.

They hadn’t counted on the memories that it would bring back.

“I’m sorry,” they said, their voice quiet and controlled. “I’m sorry that’s happened to you.”

“Are you okay?” he asked.

“... No.” They turned to face him, and Akio was startled when he saw their watery eyes. They quickly dried their tears on their wrist and said, “Nobody deserves that.”

Akio quickly got the feeling that there was more at play than Levitan merely being angry on his behalf. He stood and walked over to them, taking their hand. They were trembling.

“Can  _ I  _ tell  _ you  _ something?” asked Levitan. They picked out a new spoon to stir the cocoa with.

“Of course, babe,” said Akio.

“I, um…” They gave a little sigh. “I was in Monsoon for ten years in the fifties. I was a lot younger, not as willing to defend myself. Some… pretty rough stuff happened to me in there. Stuff like that.” They managed to steady their hands and continued stirring. “Monsoon wasn’t the only place where stuff like that happened to me, but it was the only place where I couldn’t fight back or get away, afterwards.”

Akio’s heart gave a pang for Levitan. He linked his arm with theirs.

Levitan continued, unprompted. “I wasn’t as heavily experimented on in the last five years, mostly because I was kicking and screaming the whole time. Nobody wanted to lay a finger on me like  _ that,  _ but the scientists don’t give a shit. They inspected me, inside and out. I broke a guy’s arm one time, and that was the end of that.”

Akio leaned his head on their shoulder. He couldn’t find the words.

“I’ve healed from that,” said Levitan. Their breathing had evened out. “It’s behind me, as much as it can be. Akio, if you  _ ever  _ see the people who did that to you, point them out and I will  _ end  _ them. Okay?”

“Okay.”

They took two mugs from the cupboard, poured the cocoa into them, put the pot in the sink, and added marshmallows.

“Where do you wanna drink this?” asked Levitan.

“Table’s alright.”

They sat down, Levitan at the head of the table, and Akio on their right. He held his mug in his hands, letting it warm him.

“If there’s anything I can do to help you heal,” said Levitan. “Just name it, okay?”

“Okay.” He took a breath.

“I never want you to feel like that again,” they said. “If I ever do anything that  _ remotely  _ steps out of line, tell me and I’ll do anything I can to remedy it, alright?”

“Alright.”

“Good.” They kissed his cheek.

“You must have known,” said Akio, realizing that if Levitan had experienced it themself, they surely must have guessed what had happened to him. “Why didn’t you ask?”

“I figured you’d tell me if you wanted to.”

“Thank you.”

“It’s no trouble.” They pinched his cheek slightly. “We all got our crosses to bear.”

Akio took a sip of cocoa. It warmed him up, deep within his chest, and he gave a little shiver. “I feel better after talking about it.”

“That’s usually how it is,” they said with a smile. “I find that when you share a story, it’s like giving a piece of the pain away. Does that make sense?”

“It does.” He kissed their cheek and leaned back, admiring how they blushed. “You’re very kind, Lev.” He traced his finger on the back of their hand. “Very gentle. I’m lucky to have you, you know?”

They chuckled. “You’re too good to me, darlin’. I ain’t much to look at, but god knows I try my best.”

He was a little surprised by that comment. He raised his eyebrows. “Why would you say that?”

“Well, um.” They scratched the scar on the bridge of their nose. “It’s not important.”

“I think you’re gorgeous,” he said earnestly.

They didn’t meet his eyes. “It’s not important, darlin’. Don’t worry about it.” They abruptly changed the subject. “I’m sure you’re wonderin’ how long this whole domestic thing is gonna last.”

“A bit,” he said, letting them switch topics but filing away the change for later reference.

“James and I were talkin’,” said Levitan. “We’re thinkin’ ‘bout drivin’ down to Austin. I’d been under the impression that Monsoon had  _ moved _ , but it doesn’t seem that way. Seems like New York is just a branch o’ the Austin chain. James doesn’t know much ‘bout it, aside from that there’s a big mutant colony there. Decent folks, probably some old friends there. This place is alright, but some of these folks need better care than we can provide.”

“When are we planning on going?”

“After the New Year,” said Levitan. “It’s still tentative. God knows that somethin’ might come up and we might have to flee, like usual.” They took a long sip of cocoa.

“Of course,” he said.

“There’s somethin’ else that’s on my mind,” said Levitan, propping their chin up with their fist. “I’m curious ‘bout how  _ you  _ got all the ways over to Japan.”

“Me?” he asked, wide-eyed.

“Yep. I was under the impression that Monsoon was an American company. There are a couple o’ ways you could’a gotten over there. Either someone brought you, a mutant from the America flew over and had children there, or there’s a Monsoon branch in Japan.” They took another drink. “It’s not a huge priority, but it is somethin’ I plan to find out.”

“I’ll help,” he said.

“I knew you’d say that.” They kissed his temple.

Akio was still feeling emotionally raw from the conversation that happened a few minutes prior. He wanted Levitan to kiss him stupid and make him forget about his problems.

There was a burst of laughter from the living room. Levitan leaned back to look through the doorway. Tanner had crawled up onto the wall, out of reach of James, and was flicking through his book and clicking rapidly about the contents.

Dana laughed loudly. “Jeez, James! Didn’t take you as the type to read  _ steamy romance novels. _ ”

“ _ It was lying around! _ ” he said defensively. “Come on, Tanner. You’re more mature than this.”

Levitan chuckled and leaned sat back in their seat.

“I wanna make out with you after I finish this,” Akio said, holding his half-empty mug in his hands. “Maybe we could drag up the old VCR player in the basement and watch some movies, tonight.”

“You know that I’ll never object to a nice make-out session followed by Disney movies on tape,” said Levitan. “Are you sure you wanna, after that talk?”

“Yeah,” he said. “I love it when you kiss me.”

Levitan shifted a little. “When we do it, I hope you won’t mind if you don’t touch my chest. I’m just feeling a little…” They reached into the neck of their sweater and picked at the strap of their binder. “... off.”

Akio nodded. “Of course, baby. I wanna make you feel good, I don’t wanna make you feel like that.”

Levitan gave a smile, leaned over, and kissed him. Akio deepened it, moaning softly, his tongue pushing out to meet Levitan’s. He could still taste the tang of cigarettes under the sweetness of the marshmallows and hot chocolate. Their lips were slightly chapped, but their gentleness overwhelmed that feeling.

Levitan pulled away reluctantly. “We better lay off, or Naomi’s gonna give us a hard time.

“Alright,” he said with a chuckle. 

“What do you want for Christmas?” asked Levitan.

“Honestly? I’m happy. I don’t really want anything, but I think I’m on my last razor, so that’s something I need.” He paused, remembering the gift he wanted to give Levitan. “What size sweater is that?”

“Men’s XXL,” said Levitan. “Why?”

“No reason.” He lifted the mug to his mouth with a wry grin.

Levitan smiled. They took another drink of hot chocolate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> to clarify: Naomi and Hawke are incredibly aromantic, Hawke is sex-repulsed asexual. thank u.


	9. Rum and Cocoa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Christmas day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: alcohol consumption, and SEXYTIMES, YES INDEED!

It was bright outside when Naomi woke up next to Hawke, all four of her arms wrapped around her pillow. She yawned and stretched, pressing her face into the pillow. The idea of getting up was _not_ appealing, but she had a nagging feeling that something important was happening, today.

“Mornin’,” said Hawke. His eyes were still closed, his metal arm folded over his stomach.

Naomi reached over and pinched at his goatee. “Sleep well?”

He chuckled and gently batted her hand away. “Pretty good. You?”

“Not too bad.” Naomi paused when she heard laughter from the living room. “What the shit, why are the kids up?”

“It’s the twenty-fifth.”

“ _Oh,_ right. Presents.” Naomi gave another yawn and snuggled in close to Hawke. “Merry Christmas, I guess.”

“Happy second day of Hanukkah,” he replied, combing the fingers of his human hand through her messy red hair.

Naomi chuckled and sat up. “Let’s get some pancakes going or something.” She grabbed her hairbrush from the side table and started to tease the tangles from her hair. “The kids are probably gonna be high on sugar from all the candies I put into their stockings.”

“You gave them more than just candy, right?” he asked with a playful smile.

“Oh, yeah. All of them got something nice from me that isn’t edible.” She grabbed a green hairband from the table and pushed her bangs back with it before kicking the covers off.

“ _Nng,_ it’s _cold._ ” Hawke pulled the blankets up and around himself.

“Don’t be a baby.” Naomi pulled off her nightgown and pulled underwear from her bag before stepping into a fresh pair of panties. “Up you get, big guy.”

“Five more minutes,” he moaned, rolling over, tucking the comforter in and making himself a burrito.

“Nope, we got stuff to do!” Naomi cringed when she heard the sound of something shattering, then cursing. “Shit, that’ll be another ornament. Come on, let’s _go!_ ” She yanked the blankets away from him.

“ _Ack!_ ” Hawke curled up into himself, then shot a withering glare at her. “Fuck you! That’s _cold!_ ”

“As if you ever would,” she said, tossing a handmade sweater at him. It had one of the sleeves missing so his mechanical arm would be free. “Come on!”

Hawke grumbled as he got dressed. By the time he’d put on his socks, Naomi was already putting on her false eyelashes with expert precision. She was wearing yet another four-armed sweater that she’d knitted for herself.

“Why do we have to wear these atrocities?” he asked, tugging at his own sweater. “More to the point, how did you _make_ these so fast?”

“Everybody needs a hobby,” said Naomi. “Four hands make light work, don’t slander my sweaters.” She snapped her compact shut and dropped it onto the dresser. “Let’s get out there and greet the day with a smile.”

He chuckled and opened up the door, wincing slightly as his metal hand added yet another dent onto the doorknob.

Naomi gave his butt a playful pat as they strutted out and down the stairs to the living room. She made a mental note to re-calibrate the sensitivity of his hand, later today.

Wrapping paper covered the living room carpet. Daniel, Dylan, Tanner, Dana, and Ryan sat in the middle of that mess, poking through their new presents and toys respectively. The tree sparkled in the corner, all dressed up with cheapo Christmas lights, tinsel, popcorn strings, cheap dollar store ornaments, and hand-made paper ones. Eric and Julie sat on one of the couches talking in hushed voices, while Maxine mopped up the tears that streamed steadily from her eyes at all times with a washcloth. James sat on the armchair close to the tree with a copy of “ _A Christmas Carol_ ” in his hands, reading aloud to the kids who sat on the floor. Levitan and Akio were nowhere to be seen.

“Morning,” said Naomi cheerily.

“Hey!” said Dana. “Merry Christmas! Oh, I meant Happy Hanukkah.”

“Merry Christmas to you, too,” said Naomi, plopping down onto one of the couches. A few parcels were shoved into her lap by Tanner, who was clicking excitedly about spinning the dreidel, later.

“We got you some stuff,” said Ryan. To her delight, she was wearing the sweater she knitted him that had a gameboy stitched onto the front. “Hope you like it!”

“Of course I will,” she said as Hawke unwrapped a box that contained three different gloves that would fit his human right hand.

She received a small stack of romance novels, new socks, some shiny new tools that appeared to have been stolen because there was no _way_ Ryan had the money for those, some new nail polish and makeup brushes, a travel mug, a clearly hand-made knitted hat, and a cute pair of stud earrings. She also received a toothbrush and dental floss from Dylan because according to him, “You’ve been thinking a lot about whether you have food in your teeth, lately.”

“These are wonderful, guys,” she said with a smile.

James held up his mug of hot chocolate. “Happy Holidays.” He was wearing the button-up sweater that she’d knitted for him, and she could see that most of his eyes were staring at the book in his hand.

Dylan gave a tiny gasp. “Uncle James, why would you put _that_ in your cocoa?”

“Where can I get some of _that_ cocoa?” asked Naomi.

“Looks like I’ve been found out.” James chuckled. “The rum’s in the top cupboard in the kitchen. There’s a big pot of hot chocolate on the stove, help yourself.”

Naomi bounced to her feet and into the kitchen. The cocoa was still hot, so she ladled a good helping into her new travel mug, which read “ _Hot Mama_ ” in bright red letters on a pink glittery background. She reached up into the top cupboard, standing on tiptoe, took down the rum and poured more than just a dash into the cocoa. And a little bit more.

She walked back out into the living room just as Levitan and Akio were coming down the steps.

“Merry Christmas, y’all,” said Levitan with a grin. They had their arm around Akio’s shoulders as the two of them sat down on the loveseat. “Looks like we’re late to the party.”

Akio’s hair was mussed up, and he was wearing a slightly dopey smile on his face. Naomi was sure they were making out.

She couldn’t help the sting of jealousy that pierced her chest as the kids pressed packages into Levitan’s hands. She hated that she felt bitter when she saw Akio kiss their cheek. She felt a bite of envy when James leaned over and said some inside joke that had them laughing.

Naomi hated how easy it was for Levitan to make people like them. Half the mutants here worshipped the ground they walked on, and practically ignored all the stupid shit they did. She felt like she was the only one who was still angry about the shitty way they’d acted after the Los Angeles breakout, and was probably the only one who was still mad that they’d taken off and rescued Akio without saying a word.

“Aw, son. You’re a peach.” Levitan pinched Ryan’s cheek, holding onto a polaroid camera with their other hand.

Ryan swatted their hand away. “Lev, quit it!”

Levitan chuckled and turned the camera over in their hands.

Levitan was a good person, but their reputation preceded them. Most folks loved them before they’d even met them. Naomi didn’t have that luxury. She had to work hard for the affection of others, it didn’t come naturally to her at all. She had to drag along almost twenty years of baggage from Monsoon, plus another five of living it rough on top of that. She didn’t make friends easily, and found it even harder to keep them.

Akio was tucked in close to Levitan’s side as he opened up a package. He held up the watch with wide eyes.

“I found it in the basement,” said Levitan, holding their hand out for it. “It’s from the forties. I wore it before I went off to war. I got it engraved.”

Akio flipped it over to read the engraving and smiled, his ears turning pink. He let Levitan put it on him and put a sweet kiss on the corner of their mouth as they did so.

Most of all, Naomi felt jealous of how quickly Levitan managed to develop such a strong bond with Akio. She’d seen it develop right before her eyes, and she knew that she would never have that ability to grow close to someone so quickly. Her own platonic relationship with Hawke hadn’t come overnight, and even though it was as solid as a rock _now_ , it hadn’t always been.

She was jealous of Levitan, but it was Christmas. Everyone was having fun, she couldn’t be a sourpuss.

Naomi sighed and plopped back down on the couch next to Hawke, who draped his arm around her.

“You alright?” he asked.

“I’m okay.”

“You don’t sound okay.”

“I’m fine.”

“... Alright.” He didn’t push her. He never did. He rested his cheek on top of her head instead, and Naomi knew that he was willing to listen if she wanted to talk. She didn’t really want to, right now. Maybe later.

“Alright, Lev,” said Akio. He put a large soft package in their lap. “This one is from all of us, we all pitched in as much as we could to get this for you. I gotta thank Naomi for helping me pick out the style.”

“Hey, it was your idea,” said Naomi with a smile.

Levitan wore a huge grin as they opened it up. “Jeez, I wonder what it could-” They stopped dead when they saw what it was.

A brand new leather bomber jacket sat in their lap. It was a reddish brown, had deep pockets, a soft lining around the collar and cuffs, and an air force patch skillfully sewn onto the front. Levitan lifted it reverently, eyes wide with awe.

“The patch was Naomi’s idea,” said Akio. “Also, she added your name right here.” He turned the collar to show the inside. Naomi didn’t have to look to know that Levitan’s name was stitched on in tiny gold letters.

Levitan was teary-eyed. They wiped their eyes on their wrists and sniffled. They pressed the jacket to their face, their shoulders shaking with sobs.

Naomi found herself standing and reluctantly walking over to Lev, unsure whether to comfort them or not. As she approached, Levitan planted a sloppy kiss onto Akio’s cheek, arms wrapped around him.

“Are you-” started Naomi.

Levitan quickly stood, grabbed one of her hands and pulled her in close. They hugged her tightly, face pressed into the crook of her neck.

“Thanks,” they murmured, voice choked. “I-I’m sorry, I’m just so… Th-this is so _nice._ ”

Naomi reciprocated the hug, squeezing her four arms around her as tightly as she could. “It’s no problem.”

Levitan pulled away, their eyes red and wearing a big grin. “You guys are _wonderful._ Thanks so much.”

There were a few murmurs of agreement.

Levitan snapped their fingers as they remembered something. “Oh, I gotcha somethin’. Didn’t get to wrap it until last night.” They produced a small box. “Hope you like it.”

Naomi pulled off the brown packing paper and opened the tiny box. She couldn’t help her surprised little gasp. A small silver necklace lay on the cotton batting. It was a dainty little star of David.

“Wow,” she said. “It’s beautiful. How… did you _afford_ this?”

Levitan gave a nervous little chuckle. “I got my hands a little dirty to get some cash.” They mimed a gun with their fingers. “Like the old days.”

“You did a _hit?_ ” she asked.

“Hey, I also used the money to get us food,” they said. “Don’t fret ‘bout it. Happy Hanukkah.”

Naomi didn’t really mind. She’d done some unsavoury things for money, usually of a slightly different nature. “Thank you. It’s perfect.”

“Ah, it’s nothin’,” they said. “Also, this?” They tugged at the sweater they were wearing. Naomi had knitted it. It had simple celtic knots wound around the chest and biceps, and in white block letters it read “ _Shut Up and Drink_ ”. “This is the _shit._ It’s _so_ comfortable. Thanks a bunch.” They lightly tapped their fist against Naomi’s shoulder before plopping back down on the couch next to Akio, who was wearing _his_ Christmas sweater that read “ _TWINK_ ” across the chest in red letters.

Naomi couldn’t help her little smile. Levitan was alright.

After all the fuss and bustle of unwrapping, Dana and Ryan crawled around on the floor to tidy up the wrapping paper. Tanner, Dylan and Daniel had run outside to play in the snow, Tanner having stuffed hot water bottles into his jacket so he could be out in the cold despite being cold-blooded. James still read his book and drank his boozy cocoa. Levitan and Akio sat together on the loveseat, fingers intertwined. Eric, Julie, and Maxine were still sitting quietly together and talking. Naomi contemplated the idea of making pancakes while Hawke played with her hair.

It was a quiet morning.

Dana reached under the tree to grab a few stray pieces of wrapping paper, the noticed something amiss. “Hang on, we got two more gifts back here.”

“Really?” asked Ryan. “For who?”

“Uh, hang on.” The tags were tangled together. Dana gave them a yank to try and separate them, but the cords snapped. “Aw, shit.” She hastily stuck the tags back on what she thought were the right gifts before crawling back out from under the tree. “Well, there’s one for Lev and one for Ryan, both from Akio.”

“Oh, give me that.” Akio jumped up and grabbed the box from Dana. “Thanks, I can’t believe I almost forgot about this.” He gestured for Lev to follow him around the corner towards the bathroom, out of sight.

Levitan raised an eyebrow and reluctantly got up and followed after him, hands in the pockets of their new jacket. “What’s up, pint-sized?”

“Here.” He pushed this into their hands and looked into their eyes meaningfully. “I, um. I did a lot of thinking about… stuff. I want you to have this. I think I’m ready… if that’s okay?”

Levitan was definitely interested. They pulled off the brown paper and string, and opened up the shoebox.

They frowned.

“What?” he asked nervously.

“Darlin’,” they said, lifting a gameboy cartridge from the box. “Why’d you get me a game thing?”

Akio’s heart stopped. “Oh no.”

There was a loud burst of laughter from the living room.

Akio’s socked feet slipped out from under him as he sprinted back into the room to cling to the doorway. He stopped dead at what he saw, unable to muster the strength to do anything except gasp, “ _Oh NO!_ ”

Ryan was lying on the floor, holding onto his sides he was laughing so hard. Tears rolled down his face, and he rolled back and forth, gasping for breath. The box sat next to him on the carpet, the lid half open.

James was taking a long sip of rum and cocoa when he saw what was in the box. All of his eyes widened and swivelled towards the present, and he choked on his cocoa. He spluttered, snorted, spat out half a mouthful his hot chocolate, and he laughed, loud and hard. He tried to swallow as he laughed, but some of the cocoa sprayed out his nose, instead. Tears formed in all of the eyes on his chest and shoulders as he laughed.

Dana was close enough to see what was in the box as well. She realized that she had made a terrible mistake and vowed to take this to her grave.

Akio shrieked. In a feat of previously undemonstrated acrobatics, he flung himself across the room and cleared the couch with a single leap, jumping right over Naomi and Hawke. He launched himself over the coffee table and tackled Ryan just as he was sitting up.

“ _You little shit!_ ” he said. “ _You could have been discreet but no way!_ ”

Ryan squirmed, still laughing, and pushed his hand against Akio’s face. “It’s your own fault, man! You switched the tags! You b-brought this on yourself!” He cackled, gasping for breath.

“ _I didn’t switch the tags!_ ” he protested, his voice cracking. His foot kicked the shoebox over.

Akio’s head snapped around. He watched the box tip over, almost in slow motion. The contents plopped onto the worn carpet.

A brief-style harness, a bottle of lube, and a dildo toppled out. The dildo landed on the flat end, sticking straight upwards. The lube cap wasn’t screwed on right, and it began to dribble into the carpet.

There was a brief moment of silence as the people in the room processed what was happening.

Then, there was another bout of _uproarious_ laughter. The three newbies on the couch giggled together, Ryan rolled away on the carpet still laughing, and Dana couldn’t help laughing as well, the tears rolling down her scaly cheeks. Hawke gaped at what he saw, and Naomi slapped her hands on her thighs she was laughing so hard.

Levitan stood by the entrance into the living room, awed and inspired by the scene that had unfolded before them.

“ _Gah!_ ” Akio scrambled to collect the items, but it was already too late. Naomi had seized Levitan’s new polaroid camera and snapped a picture of Akio with the flesh-coloured dildo in one hand, the other slipping in a puddle of lube.

“ _That’s_ going in the album,” she said as she shook the photo.

“ _Oh my god,_ ” whispered Akio in horror. He realized then and there that he would never be able to live this down.

James wiped the tears from his eyes on his chest. “I’m gonna remember this forever.”

“I’ll tell this story at your wedding,” said Naomi with joyful glee.

Akio put the lid back on the box, his face burning.

Ryan finally collected himself enough to speak. When he opened his mouth, he said in a sing-song voice, “ _Akio likes it up the a-ass, Akio likes it up the a-ass!_ ”

Akio whacked him on the head with the lid of the box. “ _Shut the hell your mouth!_ ”

“That’s pretty big, Akio,” said James. “You sure you can take all that? Levitan can be very _passionate._ ”

“Fuck off, James!” Then he quickly reevaluated that sentence. “Wait, how would you know?”

James wore a knowing smile. “I’ve known Lev for a _long_ time, let’s just leave it at that.”

Akio jumped when Lev put a hand on his shoulder. He looked up, and saw that they had a slight mischievous look in their eye.

“Let’s take a look,” they said, pulling him off to the private corner again. They ignored the wolf whistles and laughter from Naomi and James.

“Fuck, I’m so sorry,” he said, putting his face into his hands as Levitan examined the contents of the box. “Jesus, I wanted this to be cute and sexy, not a fucking _mess._ ”

Levitan turned the dildo over. It was of decent quality, matched their skin tone, and although it wasn’t super long, it had a good girth and a flared base, designed for harness use. The harness looked like a pair of briefs with the O-ring on the front, and they were a navy blue. The lube bottle was now half empty, but it was water-based.

“This is perfect,” said Levitan. They looked up at him. “Are you sure?”

He gave a firm nod. “I’m sure.”

They cupped his cheek and placed a soft kiss on his lips, lingering for a moment before pulling away. “You can always tell me no.”

“I know.” He poked his fingers together. “I-I have a hard time talking about it, but the idea of actually _doing_ it sounds… really, really nice.”

“Okay, sweetheart,” they said. “When do you wanna try?”

“T-tonight?”

“Tonight sounds perfect.” They kissed him again, holding the box tightly in their large hand, practically crushing it to their body.

“Hey, Akio!” called Ryan from the living room.

“You gotta clean up all this _lube!_ ” said Naomi in a jeering tone.

There was another roar of laughter from the living room.

Akio pressed his face into Levitan’s shoulder, breathing in the smell of leather jacket that he’d come to associate with them. “Why me?”

Levitan couldn’t help laughing as well.

 

It was late in the day. The sun had set, the kids sat clustered around the chimney, reading their new books and drinking hot chocolate together. Ryan was leaning against the doorway into the kitchen, vaguely aware of Levitan, James, and Naomi sitting together in intense discussion.

“Hey.” Dana stepped out of the kitchen, holding hot chocolate in her hands. She had a butterfly clip in her hair and was wearing Naomi’s Christmas sweater that had the word “ _Beautiful_ ” written on it in curlicues. She leaned against the doorway across from him.

“Hi,” he said. “Good Christmas?”

“Best one yet,” she said with a smile. Her golden eyes sparkled.

“Yep, Akio’s epic blunder kinda made it for me.”

She snorted and looked away. “Shame the tags got mixed up.”

Ryan’s eyes widened. “You _didn’t._ ”

“I did nothing!” she protested shrilly, and Ryan knew that she did.

He stifled his laughter, tilting his head back to keep himself from snorting. He saw something green and white hanging above their heads. “Oh.”

“What?” Dana followed his gaze. “Oh. Mistletoe.”

Ryan flushed pink under his freckles. “I, uh.”

“You don’t have to,” she said hastily, looking away.

“Who am I to disregard hundreds of years of tradition?” he said with a flamboyant gesture. “If I don’t adhere to the sacred kiss under the mistletoe, it would be chaos! Anarchy would run rampant! Civilization as we know it could end!”

Dana giggled. Her heart fluttered in her chest. “Well, if all _that’s_ gonna happen, I guess you better-”

Ryan cut her off by pressing his lips against her muzzle. It was short, soft, and sweet, his hand resting on her forearm as he did so.

Ryan pulled away with a silly smile. “Sorry, I kinda cut you off.”

“It’s fine,” said Dana. Her stomach was doing funny little flips.

“Wanna go read some comics?”

“Yeah, that would be great.”

Behind them, Levitan coughed into their fist and held their hand out to James, who reluctantly pulled five dollars out of his pocket to hand to them.

“I told y’all somethin’ was up,” said Levitan. They took another drink of rum and cocoa and set down the mug. “Where were we?”

“Our next move,” said Naomi flatly, wishing that she’d thought of betting on Ryan and Dana’s relationship status. “We’re going to Austin.”

“Right,” said Levitan. “Austin. It’s safer. That’s where the mutant colony is. There will be more of us, and there will be folks who can look after the newbies. It would be even better if we could find a couple who wanna adopt Dylan and Daniel. They’re only eleven, and it would be good if we could get them a place more stable. The resistance ain’t a place for kids.”

“... You say as you drag your own kid into it,” said Naomi.

Levitan pointed a finger at them. “ _Watch it._ I _quit_ the resistance for my son, and that didn’t get me nowhere. He’s old enough now to decide whether he wants to be a part of this or not.”

“He’s not an adult, Lev,” said James quietly.

Levitan gave a sigh. “Yeah, but for all he’s gonna listen to me, I might as well help him be a part of things and stay safe. He’s skilled and he’s got a good head on his shoulders, but he can’t follow orders. But that’s somethin’ I can worry ‘bout another time. What route should we take to get to Austin? Are there any safe houses we can stop by?”

“None that I can think of,” said James. “We’re best off just going straight through Kentucky, Tennessee and Arkansas. We’re looking at a two or three day drive, depending on how many times you wanna stop.”

“We’ll take the three days,” said Levitan.

“Risky,” said Naomi.

“Nobody wants to be cooped up for more than a few hours,” said Levitan. “Especially not the newbies, who’ve spent most of their lives being cooped up. The extra day won’t kill us.”

“Seen any white vans in your travels into town?” asked James.

“Nope,” said Levitan. “Seems like Monsoon has no idea where I went. Let’s keep it that way.”

“That was a clever little trick you pulled with that guy who worked there,” said James, “But it won’t work twice, and Monsoon is probably on high alert after that stunt.”

“I know,” said Levitan. “Listen, attacking Monsoon Austin is gonna be a long, _long_ project. Might even take years. Last I was there, the place was _huge._ I dunno what it looks like, I dunno what resources we have, but it ain’t gonna be a one night deal like LA, and it ain’t gonna be a quick in-and-out like when I rescued Akio. This is gonna take a lotta patience.”

James nodded. “Of course. Are you planning on spearheading it?”

“I dunno,” said Levitan.

“Of course you are,” said Naomi.

Levitan shook their head. “I really don’t know. We have no idea what kinda systems they got in place, who’s in charge, whether they got plans rollin’ already. I’m just plannin’ on throwin’ my hat into the mix.”

“As soon as you show up, the news is gonna spread among the mutants like wildfire,” said James. “It’s gonna get _crazy._ ”

“When is it _not_ crazy?” asked Levitan. “We haven’t decided how soon we wanna leave.”

“New Years Day,” said James. “We’ll head out early. Roads will be clear, most people will be at home and hungover.”

“Sounds like a plan,” said Levitan. They looked up at the clock on the wall. “Jeez, that time already?” They cleared a few more gravy-streaked plates from the table and put them by the sink to be loaded into the dishwasher. “Is that everything for tonight?”

“Should be,” said James, getting to his feet. “We’ll break the news tomorrow, then get packing.”

“I’m gonna miss this place,” said Naomi with a note of sadness in her voice.

Levitan patted her shoulder as they walked by. “Me too. Lotta good memories here, but it’ll be here for us when we come by again.”

“Sure,” she said. “Merry Christmas, Lev.”

“Happy Hanukkah, you guys,” they said, lingering by the doorway.

“Don’t dawdle,” said James. “Everybody here knows you’re _dying_ to go upstairs to Akio.”

“Jeez, am I _that_ transparent?”

“ _Yes_ ,” said Naomi and James simultaneously.

Levitan couldn’t help but laugh, even though their ears were red. “Well, g’night, y’all. Sweet dreams.”

They could hear the giggles from the kitchen as they took the stairs two at a time, up to their bedroom. Levitan opened the door, quickly stepped in, and locked it behind them.

“Hi.”

Levitan turned. Akio sat on the bed, clutching the blankets to his chest. His shoulders were bare, and his glasses sat crookedly on his nose.

“Hey,” said Levitan.

They glanced down. The harness, lube, and dildo sat on the bed.

“What did you guys talk about?” asked Akio, letting the blankets fall to his lap.

Levitan couldn’t tear their eyes away from him. His hips and waist had gathered a little more weight over the last month and a half. The skin was smooth and perfect. He had a small happy trail leading up to his navel.

“Well?” he asked as they remained silent.

“Oh, uh,” they said hastily, trying to collect themself. “Just… how we’re gonna go to Austin on New Years Day.”

“Oh, alright.” Akio tilted his head slightly, and Levitan thought he looked _adorable._ “So, um. D-do you wanna do this?”

“Yes, definitely,” they said. They draped their new jacket over the doorknob, then pulled the sweater over their head. They dropped it to the floor, then picked off their socks and tossed them aside as well. They fumbled with their belt, hands trembling just a little bit.

“Let me,” said Akio, crawling over to Levitan. He fought to keep his hands steady as he unfastened the buckle on their belt, popped the button on their jeans, and slid their pants down.

Levitan pulled off their top, leaving on their white binder. They leaned down and pressed a kiss to Akio’s lips.

Akio threw his arms around Levitan’s shoulders and pulled them in close, deepening the kiss immediately. Levitan moaned, pushed him down onto the bed with a little bounce, and straddled him. They continued the kiss, gently pinning his wrists down to the mattress. Akio closed his eyes and made a soft pleading sound, urging them to continue. Levitan’s mouth left his and moved down to his neck to leave a hickey that would fade in a matter of minutes.

“W-what do you wanna do?” he asked as they nibbled his throat.

“I wanna blow you,” they murmured in his ear. “And I want you to blow me.”

Akio didn’t really understand how he could _blow_ them, but he was more than willing to try. He wanted to give Levitan everything he had. He wanted them to have complete control over this encounter. He loved their weight on him, he loved their hands in his, he loved their mouth on his neck.

“I-I’d like that,” said Akio. “Just show me what to do.”

Levitan rolled off of him, and he missed the warmth. He couldn’t tear his eyes away as they shimmied out of their boxer-briefs and picked up the harness. He traced the scars on their body with his eyes, soaking up every detail. He saw a white jagged scar that laced their ribs, an old bullet wound on their shoulder, and several old scars on their back. A small trail of hair went up their stomach, the hair between their legs was curly.

“Like what you see?” they asked, pulling on the harness.

Akio nodded. “Christ, you’re gorgeous.”

Levitan chuckled and plucked the glasses from his nose. They set them on the side table and positioned themself on the edge of the bed. They dropped a pillow to the floor for Akio to kneel on.

Akio took his place before them and put his hands on their thighs. The dildo was inches from his face. He felt intimidated by it, but he had butterflies in his stomach all the same.

“Um… what should I do?” he asked.

“Stroke it.” They took his hand, squirted a dollop of lube in his palm, and put it on the dildo. “Know anything about blowjobs?”

“I’ve received one and watched porn, that’s all,” he said lamely. He hesitantly stroked his hand over the rubber cock, wondering whether this was doing anything at all.

“F-forget everything you’ve seen in porn, it’s all bullshit.” Levitan gripped the sheets with tense fingers. “You gotta tease, darlin’. Run your tongue over the head, drag your lips over it. It ain’t as much about the showy in-and-out as you might think, y’know.”

“Is this doing anything for you?” he asked dubiously as he stroked his hand over the fake cock.

“Y-you have no idea,” they said weakly.

Akio looked up and took in Levitan’s expression. Their pupils were blown, sweat was beading on their brow, and they couldn’t take their eyes away from him as he stroked their shaft.

“Really?” he asked, surprised.

“The pressure is nice,” they murmured, “F-feels real good on my clit. More n’ that, the visual really takes the cake, darlin’.”

Visual, huh? Akio decided to put on a show, inexperienced as he might be. He slowly licked his lip, pressing his thumb to the moulded slit on the end of the cock.

Levitan was entranced by him, and the attention made him feel giddy with power. He stroked his hand over their dick, then gripped it by the base and ran his tongue over the head, looking up at them through lowered lashes.

“ _Oh my god,_ ” they whispered breathlessly.

Akio teased his tongue along the length, not loving the taste of the silicone but putting up with it for Levitan’s sake. If their panting breaths and the slight tremble in their thick thighs were any indication, he definitely _should not stop._ He lowered his gaze and focused on pleasuring them, his other hand sliding between their legs to rub at them through the fabric of the harness.

Levitan gave a small noise of surprise, but didn’t stop him. “A-a bit higher, closer to the dick. Th-that’s where my clit is.”

Akio followed the directions and memorized what the texture felt like so he could find it more easily. He trailed his fingers between their legs, noting the growing dampness that soaked through the harness. Levitan groaned and tilted their head back as he gently traced his finger along the ridges and valleys between their legs.

“You’re doin’ so good, baby,” they said. “Completely missed my clit, though.”

Akio flushed red with embarrassment but didn’t pull away. Levitan took his hand and guided his fingers towards the right place.

“Like that,” they said as his fingers circled just the right spot. “Mm, yeah. Keep that up, a-at this rate, I’ll get there in no time.”

Akio could feel himself drooling slightly as he licked at the dildo, and he realized that he probably looked really silly. He pulled away, feeling a bit self conscious.

“Somethin’ wrong?” asked Levitan.

“Am I doing this right?” he asked, still tracing his finger over their clit. “I-I feel like I’m doing this wrong.”

“Darlin’ you look pretty as a picture.” Levitan ran their fingers through his hair. “What you’re doin’ is great. Maybe you could suck on it a lil’? Fuck, that would be so good.” They dropped their hand back to the bed.

Akio abruptly popped the head of the dildo into his mouth, looking up at them and asking the question with his eyes, “ _Like this?_ ”

Levitan gave a groan. They watched him slowly get used to the sensation of having a cock in his mouth. He took them a little deeper, then retreated so just the tip rested on his tongue. He bobbed his head down again, trying to get a rhythm and letting his saliva lube up their cock. He knew he must be drooling a little, but he didn’t really care. He let out a little moan as the tip of the cock touched the back of his throat.

“Holy fuck,” murmured Levitan. “God, this is so fuckin’ hot.”

Akio groaned again, gaining more confidence in his movements. He stroked his hand along their dick in time to his slow, luxurious sucks. His other hand worked their clit, toggling the shaft of it back and forth through the harness. Levitan twitched slightly every time he flicked his fingers in just the right way.

Something in them seemed to relent, and they pulled their hands away from their vice-like hold on the sheets. They gripped his hair in their fist and took control. They directed his head where they wanted it, and Akio gladly let them.

“F-fuck, baby,” said Levitan, their voice low and harsh with want. “You look so fuckin’ good with your mouth ‘round my cock.”

Akio tried to keep eye contact as best as he could as Levitan’s dick stretched his lips and jaw in an ache that made his own dick strain against his briefs. His eyes watered and his hand worked between Levitan’s legs, and he prayed that he was bringing them closer to orgasm. He desperately wanted them to feel good, he didn’t care how long it would take.

Levitan gave a little shudder. Akio rubbed two of his fingers over their clit, applying just a bit more pressure, and continued to let Levitan fuck his mouth with their cock. They were panting heavily, their thighs were tense and twitching, their other hand was on his head now, and next thing he knew-

“ _Akio!_ ” they gasped out, curling inwards and around him, still clinging to his hair. He stilled his movements on their cock, but continued to rub at their clit through their briefs. They trembled against him. He could feel their body pulsing around his damp fingers.

“Th-that’s enough,” they said, pushing his hand away from their clit. They leaned down and pressed a kiss to his wet lips. They smiled when they pulled away and rubbed their thumb across his chin, wiping away the drool. “Baby, you did so good. Fuck, I-I dunno how long it’s been since I’ve felt like that.”

“You’re really sensitive,” he said, resting his hands on their thighs.

“Yeah,” they said dreamily. “Probably ain’t gonna last, though. I wanna suck your dick, baby. Can I do that?”

“Y-yeah,” he said, getting to his feet.

Levitan dropped to the floor before him, kneeling on the same pillow. They mouthed at his hard cock through his briefs, looking up at him with a sly smile, and pulled them down his legs so he could kick them aside.

The height difference made this position a little awkward, but Levitan didn’t seem to mind. They had to _bend over_ to reach his dick, which probably wasn’t very good for their shoulders and back. They leaned in and placed a kiss at the base of his dick. He whimpered.

“You okay?” asked Akio.

“Yeah.” They looked up at him questioningly. “Why?”

“That doesn’t look too comfortable for your back,” he said. “We could switch it up.”

Levitan smiled and that made Akio blush. “Yeah, sounds alright. Mind stepping back a bit?”

“Uh.” Akio took two steps back, so his shoulders were pressed against the cool wall. “Sure. Why the-”

Levitan slid forward, pillow still under their knees, picked Akio up and put his legs over their shoulders. Akio couldn’t contain his gasp as he was supported by Levitan entirely, his back pressed up against the wall.

“Is this what you had in mind?”

“ _It’s so much better,_ ” he said earnestly.

Levitan grinned, their arms wrapped around his thighs, and took his cock into their mouth. They hummed with pleasure, not hesitating in taking him deep again and again.

Akio cried out, grasping Levitan’s short hair, desperate for something to hold onto. He writhed under their talented mouth and hands, feeling lost in the pleasure. Their mouth was fucking _magical._ They flicked their tongue in just the right way to make him squirm, the way they hollowed out their cheeks as they sucked was _fantastic_ , and it was just too-

“ _Ah! Lev, I’m-_ ” He couldn’t finish his sentence. Pleasure coursed through his veins. He trembled in their arms, shuddering violently as they continued to blow him through his orgasm.

Levitan swallowed, which Akio found _super_ hot, and let his feet touch the ground. He almost dropped to his knees, his legs still wobbly, but they held him up with their hands on his hips.

Akio was red-faced. “Fuck, I’m _so_ sorry!” he said. “I-I didn’t mean… I-it all happened so _fast_ I’m-”

“Shh.” Levitan gripped his hips and pulled him closer to them, smirking playfully up at him. “I ain’t through with you, yet.”

Akio gulped found himself being pulled over to the bed and pushed down. Levitan straddled him and ran their hands down his chest, stomach, and sides.

“Fuck, you’re so pretty,” they murmured. “Can’t take my eyes offa you.” They grabbed a glass of water from the side table and took a swig to wash their mouth out before leaning down and dropping a kiss on Akio’s lips.

Akio sank into it immediately, his heart doing funny and wonderful flips in his chest. Levitan wrapped their hand around his half-hard cock and stroked it slowly, using the leftover saliva as lube. He whimpered with oversensitivity, but soon that borderline almost-pleasure almost-pain faded into the wonderful sensation of Levitan’s calloused but gentle hand on his cock.

The pace was slow and sweet. Akio mewled and bucked his hips up into their hand, holding on for as long as he could while they traced their thumb over the head of his cock. He kissed down their neck and shoulder, gripping tightly onto their waist as they tugged him slowly towards orgasm. Levitan was unhurried, they straddled his thigh and ground their hips down onto it for their own pleasure.

They pulled away from the kiss to gaze into his eyes with a look of complete and utter adoration that had Akio feeling very big and very small at the same time. Akio felt like the only man in the whole world when they looked at him like that.

“Good?” they asked, still stroking his cock.

“Mmhmm. You?”

“ _Real_ good.” They kissed him again, just behind the ear. “You’re so goddamn beautiful.”

“So’re you,” he replied, holding tightly onto them, never wanting to let go.

It was romantic. Levitan leaned their forehead against Akio’s, gasping slightly as they humped his thigh. They stroked his dick with expertise, and it wasn’t too long before Akio came again, hips jutting into Levitan’s rough but slick palm. He gasped their name against his mouth, gripping onto the straps of their binder for a hold.

Levitan wiped their hand on the sheets and rolled off of him, flushed and panting for air. They looked over at him with a huge, silly grin on their face.

“H-how was that?” they asked breathessly.

“Goddamn perfect,” he said, cuddling up to them.

“You did so well, darlin’,” they said, their voice a little bit rough. “Merry Christmas.”

“Best gift _ever_.” He wrapped an arm around their waist. “I’m gonna be honest… I thought you’d wanna fuck me with that.”

“Well,” said Levitan thoughtfully. “I sorta thought that it’s a good thing to work up to, y’know? It’s kinda intense, and I consider it really intimate.”

“Oh, of course.”

“You sound disappointed.”

“I’m not! I promise.”

Levitan gave a little chuckle. “So you’re really sayin’ that prostate stimulation _wasn’t_ the first thing on your mind when you bought this?”

“I’m not saying _that,_ ” he said, ears red with embarrassment.

Levitan laughed, rolled over, pinned him down, and blew a raspberry on his stomach.

“ _Ack!_ Quit it!” He tried to push them away, but they pressed their mouth to his sweaty skin and blew another one. “ _That tickles!_ ”

Levitan grinned and put a gentle kiss on his belly instead, then another one on his chest, and another one on his throat. “Couldn’t help myself, baby. You’re just too cute.”

Akio yawned. “Tired.”

“Me too.” Levitan wriggled out of the harness and kicked it aside before crawling under the covers. “Come cuddle.”

Akio gladly slipped under the blanket. Levitan sat up long enough to work off the binder and toss it aside.

“I hate sleeping in it,” said Levitan, settling back down. “I always wake up at three AM with stabbing pains in my ribs.”

“Ouch.” Akio pressed a kiss to their collar bone, avoiding touching their breasts. “This was the best Christmas ever.”

“Same here.” They yawned and flicked out the lamp. “We’re gonna get hell from Naomi and James in the morning.”

“Oh yeah, totally.” Akio closed his eyes as Levitan played with his hair. “One hundred percent worth it. I’ll take all the teasing in the world if we get to do that, again.”

“Next time, I’ll put it up your butt.”

Akio let out a faint little sigh. “Christ, that would be great. Goodnight, love.”

“Goodnight, darlin’.”

Akio was out within a few minutes. Levitan listened to him murmur softly in his sleep before drifting off to slumber, themself.

Snow gently drifted down outside of the little barn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shit got real in this chapter  
> largely unedited because it's 4:30 am and I just wrote 20 pages so I'm clocking out goodnight errybody


	10. Interview

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The mutants arrive at the new base outside of Austin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: ptsd symptoms, flashbacks, torture mention, suicide mention

Levitan hummed along to the radio as they drummed their fingers on the steering wheel. Akio sat next to them in the passenger side, Ryan, Dana, and Tanner were squished together in the back of the car. Ryan had his hand supporting his chin as he gazed out the window.

“How much longer?” asked Ryan.

Tanner clicked irritably.

Dana elbowed him in the ribs. “That’s not nice.”

“Don’t fight, you guys,” said Akio, glancing back over his shoulder.

All three of them stuck their tongues out at him and blew big, wet raspberries. Ryan had his middle finger up.

Akio turned back around and folded his arms petulantly. He glanced at Levitan, who had a slight smirk on their face.

“What’s so funny?” he asked with a pout.

“You’re adorable, darlin’,” said Levitan with a sweet smile. “That’s all.”

“So are you,” he said, letting his hands drop to his lap.

“Pfft, I ain’t  _ adorable, _ ” they said. “I’m tough as  _ nails. _ ”

“Of course, sweetheart.” He wanted to lean in and kiss their cheek, but they were driving. He contented himself with reaching over and taking their hand.

Levitan locked their fingers with Akio’s. Akio loved the feeling of their hand in his. Their fingers were calloused, their palm was rough, but their touch was very gentle. They drew little circles on the back of his hand with their thumb. Akio let his mind wander to how those hands felt on his  _ body _ , then he immediately backtracked because he didn’t wanna get caught with a boner.

“Lev, we’ve been driving for  _ hours, _ ” whined Ryan. “How much  _ longer? _ ”

Levitan let out an exasperated sigh. “Jesus, son, if you looked out the window you’d  _ know. _ ”

Ryan glanced out the window in time to see a passing sign that said “ _ Austin, 20 Miles _ ”. “Oh,” he said flatly.

Empty fields rolled past as they drove. Akio idly wondered what they were going to find in the way of a safehouse. He pictured something similar to the barn, maybe bigger or more underground.

“It’s been years since I’ve been here,” said Levitan. They rolled down the window and let some of the warm air into the car. They took a deep breath and let out a long sigh. “Looks kinda different from when I was young.”

“I bet,” said Akio, watching out the window as they turned down a little dirt road alongside a dormant corn field. The car bumped along through the ruts and divots in the road, the field slowly turned into a small forest. The trees were small at first, but as they continued along the road for a few miles, the forest grew thicker and denser. The patchy sunshine became hidden with crooked branches.

Levitan stopped the car.

Akio rolled down the window and looked out. There was a gate up ahead, a low fence, and a little booth with a single window and a door. A small sign that said “PRIVATE PROPERTY” in red letters was attached to the gate. A person stepped out of the booth and walked up to the car. She had black curly hair, dark skin, bright eyes, and a gun on her hip. She was dressed like a guard.

“Can I help y’all?” she asked. Her eyes didn’t quite point in the same direction.

Levitan gave a small smile. “I’m sure you can, ma’am. I’m just lookin’ to find some  _ sparrows. _ ”

The woman raised her eyebrows. “Oh. You know the word, but… who’re you?”

“Name’s Levitan Reeves,” they said calmly. “I got two cars full’a mutants, half o’ who are freshly escaped from Monsoon. Mind lettin’ us in?”

As soon as Levitan said their name. “Oh, of course! Certainly!” The woman yanked the radio from her belt, pressed her thumb to the button and said, “Hey Dale! Guess who I got here!  _ Levitan fuckin’ Reeves! _ ” She dashed off to open up the gate.

“You certainly know how to make an entrance,” said Akio.

Levitan winked and clicked their tongue at him as they drove past the gate. The forest growth was dense, then the car turned a corner and the woods opened up into a large clearing.

There was a cluster of buildings along the dirt road. Small houses and trailers were lined up along the road. The houses looked old and somewhat run-down, and the trailers had grass growing up around the wheels. They hadn’t moved in years. Two larger buildings stood proudly at the end of the little dirt road. One was low and square, and the other had an attachment up top that appeared to be a radio tower and a lookout.

The car and the van pulled up in front of the two larger buildings. By the time they got there, people had begun to pour out of the houses and trailers to surround the two cars.

Akio didn’t have to see the scaled faces, the feathers, and the multiple limbs to know that each and every one of these people were mutants.

Levitan climbed out of the car and slammed the door shut behind them. “Afternoon, y’all.”

A woman stepped up to the front. Her features were Asian, her short black hair was slicked back, and she wore work clothes. She had two identical heads mounted on her shoulders.

“You’re Levitan Reeves,” she said, both heads speaking simultaneously.

“I am,” they said with a polite head dip. “And you are?”

“My name is Yumi Kyen,” her left head replied. “I’m in charge around here. What brings you back to these parts?”

“A fresh crowd of newbies broken from the Los Angeles Monsoon branch,” said Levitan, jerking a thumb towards the van. “The base of some of these mutants got compromised. We decided to come here for a place to stay and a way to help rehabilitate these escapees.”

“All mutants are welcome here,” said Yumi. She held out a hand to shake.

Levitan clasped her hand firmly. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“How many of you are there?” she asked.

“Thirteen,” said Levitan. “We have some stuff, but not a whole lot.”

“ _ Junjie! _ ” called Yumi.

A tall man hopped up to the front of the crowd with a little spring in his step. His skin was patchy and multicoloured, flaking off on his cheeks to reveal vibrant shades of red, blue, and gold underneath.

“Yes?” he said pleasantly. His voice was low and soothing.

“Can you set up thirteen beds?” asked Yumi.

“Twelve,” said Naomi, leaning against Hawke.

“Eleven,” added Levitan, draping an arm around Akio’s shoulders.

“Ten!” chirped Ryan, giving Dana a little wink. She looked flustered and hid her face behind her hand.

“Eleven,” said Levitan again. They slapped him on the back of the head.

“ _ Ow! _ ” he said, putting his hand on his head. “What was  _ that  _ for?”

“You’re fifteen,” said Levitan. “You’re not allowed to date until you’re twenty-one.”

“ _ What?! _ ”

“No sex until you’re thirty, I’ve decided.”

Ryan laughed. “Jeez, I have  _ bad  _ news for you.”

Levitan’s eyes went wide and they snapped their head around to stare at their son. They grabbed him by the ear and pulled, raising him up on tiptoe.

“ _ Ow, ow, ow! Lev! _ ”

“We’re gonna have a talk about  _ rules _ , son,” they said. “After we get things settled. Got it?”

“ _ Okay, okay! _ ”

Levitan dropped him and ruffled his hair. “Glad we got that sorted.”

“So… eleven beds?” asked Yumi.

“Eleven,” said Levitan firmly. 

Yumi chuckled and waved at Junjie, who gave a two fingered salute and dashed off into one of the little houses. “Coming right up. We’ll set you all up and make you comfortable. For anyone who’s human-passing, we can help you get jobs in the city. Other people can help tend the farm or keep things running smoothly around here.”

“We have a couple of kids, too.”

“Is that so?” asked Yumi. “Whose are they?”

“Nobody’s,” said Levitan. “Well, Ryan is my son. The twins are a bit of a handful, but they could use-”

“I know  _ exactly  _ who would be perfect to look after them,” said Yumi. “Don’t worry about a thing, we’ll set you guys up and put you to work.”

“Thank you kindly.”

“Anything we can help you with, Reeves?”

“It’s Levitan,” they said, “And no, your kindness much appreciated.”

“Don’t get too comfy, yet,” said Yumi’s right head. Her left head appeared to be preoccupied with the movements of the clouds. “We have more than just a few questions to ask you, like where you’ve been for the past ten years.”

“We will definitely have time,” said Levitan. “I hope you don’t mind if we put that off until morning, because-”

“No,” said Yumi firmly. “Now. We will need to speak to each and every one of you separately. We had a close call recently and our camp was nearly compromised, we can’t take any chances.”

“I understand,” said Levitan evenly. They didn't care much for her tone, but they respected the way she carried herself with authority.

“It’s just procedure,” said Yumi. “Thank you for your patience. We’ll take you into the waiting room, and I’ll ask you a few questions in private first.”

“Certainly.” Levitan kept their arm around Akio as the group followed Yumi into the base.

“Um, Levitan?” asked Akio.

“Yeah, darlin’?” said Levitan. 

He gripped their arm. “This isn’t, um, gonna be like an  _ interrogation,  _ is it?”

“They wouldn’t do that to us,” they said firmly as they entered the front door.

The building had wide halls and large rooms with big windows. Natural light streamed in onto the long table and rows of comfortable mis-matched chairs.

“This is the room where we typically have meetings,” said Yumi. “Your friends can wait here.” She pulled a radio from her hip. “Junjie, when your buddies get the beds set up, try and scrounge some food for the newcomers.”

The radio buzzed. “ _ You got it, boss! _ ”

“Of course,” said Levitan. “Thank you, food would be much appreciated.” They reluctantly pulled away from Akio.

“Don’t think you’re gonna get special treatment because you’re Levitan Reeves,” said Yumi as she snapped the radio back onto her hip. “But I’ll keep things short because you must have been driving awhile to get here.”

“Alright, let’s get things over with.” Levitan glanced at Akio, who looked very nervous about this whole situation. “You okay, hon?”

“This feels weird,” he mumbled. “Kinda… institutional.”

“We  _ are  _ a ramshackle institute,” said Yumi. “One of our own design, and we only want to keep everybody here safe, secure, and comfortable. You’re newcomers, this is just standard procedure. We’re here for  _ all  _ mutants, and these protective measures keep us safe.”

“You don’t gotta explain that to me,” said Levitan, stepping away from Akio. “Let’s go.”

“It’s just over here.” Yumi walked down to the end of the hall and opened up a door.

Levitan gave a wave to her friends around the table. “Back in a few.”

James gave a thumbs up. Akio looked at his feet.

The room was fairly small, but it wasn’t too bad. There was a window, a small table, two chairs, and a security camera in the corner.

“Why the surveillance?” asked Levitan as they took a seat.

“It’s not just other mutants that we’ve had to interrogate, here.” Yumi shut the door and sat across the table from Levitan. “Before I give you the details of what’s going on here, I have a few questions for you.”

“Shoot.”

“Where have you been for the past fifteen years?”

“In hiding for ten, back in Monsoon for five,” said Levitan.

“Why were you hiding?”

“I had a son,” they said. “I didn’t want him to be near all this violence of the rebellion, so I ran away. I stayed at a safehouse for awhile, then I hopped from one place to the next, keeping an eye out for work. When my boy was ten, Monsoon found me out and carted me off, but then he broke me out less than two months ago.”

Yumi jotted down a few notes on her pad. “Alright. How did you know about this place?”

“I built it. Doy.”

“Oh.” Yumi tilted both of her heads. “Is that so?”

“Yep,” said Levitan. “Back in the seventies. It wasn’t my idea, but I lended a helping hand.”

“Interesting.” Yumi tapped her pen against her lip. “Can you tell me about the people you’re travelling with?”

Levitan gave a nod. “Yeah, I’ll give you the bullet points version. There’s Ryan, my boy, and Dana and Tanner. Ryan’s got my abilities, and the other two seem to have lizard and gecko mutations. Good kids, Dana’s got gumption. There are the twins, Daniel and Dylan. One of ‘em can read minds, the other one can manipulate magnetic fields. Can’t remember which is which though.”

Yumi scrawled this information down. “Go on.”

“Naomi’s got four arms,” said Levitan. “She’s a bit of a wiseass but a solid mechanic, which is good because her partner Hawke has a mechanical arm and eye.”

“Mmhmm.” She made a few more notes.

“James is my oldest friend,” said Levitan. “Good man, knows a lot about psychology and medicine. He was a key element in many anti-Monsoon operations back in the day. His mutation is that he has eyes on his chest and shoulders.”

“Oh, I think I’ve heard of him.”

“I’m not surprised, he has his own reputation. There’s Eric, who’s albino and extremely suggestible.”

“How so?” asked Yumi.

“If you shout a command at him, or sometimes even if you imply it, he’ll feel compelled to obey you. It’s more of a curse than anything.” Levitan sighed sympathetically. “Julie is covered in scales and feathers, and Maxine just… leaks fluids. All the time. I haven’t talked to them much, they’re all fairly quiet as far as newbies go.”

“What about the last one?”

“Oh, Akio. Of course.” Levitan sighed and decided to omit certain  _ details  _ about how they met. “We met awhile ago. His mutation is the same as mine.”

“Which is?”

“We’re indestructible,” said Levitan. “Immortal, can’t age, can’t die. We’re not too certain about my son yet, he is half human, but he appears to have my powers, as well.”

“You and Akio are romantically involved?”

“Jeez, I sure hope so.” Levitan chuckled. “Anything else you have to ask me?”

“What brings you here, anyway?” asked Yumi.

“We broke out some mutants, destroyed the base of a few others, and we need a safe place to lie low. That’s about it.”

“I see. How long are you planning on staying?”

Levitan folded their hands in front of them. “The group as a whole or me personally?”

“Both.”

“I can’t say for sure what everyone’s plans are,” said Levitan, “But I think more than a few of us are planning on being here long term. As for me, I ain’t certain yet. It depends on more than just a few factors, y’know?”

“Of course.” Yumi wrote this information down, too. “You knew the code word, and you’re  _ Levitan Reeves,  _ so I believe I can trust you. However, I would like a demonstration of your mutation, just so we can be sure.”

“Yeah, alright.” Levitan pulled a knife from their pocket, grabbed the blade, and sliced open their palm. They let their hand rest on the table, palm up.

“I’m not certain if you remember me,” said Yumi as she gazed at Levitan’s hand, “But we’ve met before. I was a kid at the time, it was at the old base in Arizona.”

“Arizona?” Levitan scratched the back of their neck. “Yeah, I think so. You were just a little tyke at the time, huh?”

“I was,” she said. “I think I was six. That base is gone, now. Stormed by Monsoon workers.”

“Really? Wow, where did the time go?” Levitan tilted their head back with a sigh.

Yumi stared at their hand, mesmerized as the cut slowly healed. The skin scabbed over and knit itself back together right before her eyes.

“Wow,” she said breathlessly. “You really  _ are  _ Levitan Reeves.”

“Yep,” they said cheerily. “Want me to blow my brains out to prove it?”

“Ah, no, that’s alright.” She straightened out her notes. “It’s really a pleasure to meet you.”

“Likewise.”

“An honour, even. I heard stories about you when I was growing up.”

“Any songs?” asked Levitan with a slight smile.

“No, no songs.”

“Dangit. Someone better get on that.” They stood. “I need to check in on my crew. Will that be all?”

“Yes,” she said, getting to her feet. “Send Akio in, next.”

“Alright,” they said with slight reluctance. “Go easy on him, alright? He was interrogated while he was at Monsoon.”

“No promises,” said Yumi. “Send him in.”

Levitan shook their head as they shut the door behind them. They were worried about how Akio would deal with this, but there was nothing to be done. The interview wasn’t too bad, he could handle it. They just hoped he wouldn’t say anything stupid.

“Akio?”

“Yeah?” He raised his head from his bowl of beef stew. He looked apprehensive.

“Your turn,” said Levitan, holding a hand out to him.

Akio took their hand and reluctantly got to his feet. He let them pull him into a short hug.

“It’ll be over soon, okay?” said Levitan, cupping his cheek. “Don’t fret your pretty lil’ head.”

“Okay.” Akio took a breath. When his eyes were closed, Levitan placed a gentle kiss on the corner of his mouth.

“I’ll be right out here, waiting for you,” said Levitan gently.

Akio swallowed and nodded before pulling away. “Okay. I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

Levitan took a seat at the long table next to James. “Sure you will. See you soon.” They smiled as they received a bowlful of stew from the little old lady with tentacles for fingers. “Aw, this looks delicious.”

“Eat up, dear,” said the lady. Her white hair was pulled back into a tight bun. Her face was wrinkled from the sun and her laugh lines were very prominent. “You look famished.”

“You read my mind, ma’am.”

“Aren’t you the sweetest!” She pinched Levitan’s cheek with her suction-cupped fingers. “Call me Rhoda, or grandma if you like!”

Levitan chuckled and dug their spoon into the stew. “Sure thing, ma’am.” 

Akio steeled himself as he pushed the door open. It looked different from Monsoon, the chairs were nice, there was a window, and it seemed a great deal more comfortable. The walls were yellow instead of white.

“Sit down.” Yumi was seated at the little table and held a notepad in her hand.

Akio slowly closed the door and took a seat across from her.

“What’s your full name?” she asked.

“Dr. Akio Sato.”

Fuck. He could punch himself.

Her pen hovered. One of her heads looked up at him and narrowed her eyes. “... What’s your degree in?”

“I-I have two. Biology and… g-genetic engineering.”

Yumi frowned. “How did you meet Levitan?”

“Well… Um…” Lying wasn’t going to get him anywhere. He decided to be honest. “I used to be a scientist who worked for Monsoon. I-I was low ranking, I didn’t know anything. Levitan basically-”

“You were one of  _ them, _ ” snapped Yumi. She stood, hands planted on the table. “What the  _ fuck  _ are you doing here?”

“I-I’m here with Levitan!” he protested as she loomed over him. He gripped the chair by the seat, his heart rate jumping as his breath began to quicken in his chest. “I-I’m a mutant, I swear! I h-h-had no idea that M-Monsoon was doing all this bad stuff until a week before Levitan broke out and-”

“You’re a  _ spy  _ aren’t you?” growled Yumi. She reached for the gun on her hip and levelled it between his eyes. “ _ I want names!  _ Who sent you?!”

“Nobody sent me!” he cried. Tears welled up in his eyes. He was suddenly back in the white room, wearing the jumpsuit, being yelled at by guards and scientists before he was cuffed and dragged back to his cell. He wanted to melt into the floor, he wanted to run, but he felt helpless and rooted to the chair he was sitting in. He put his hands over his face and tried to hold back the sobs.

“ _ Look at me! _ ” Yumi shouted. “Quit hiding your face! I  _ know  _ you’re working for Monsoon, you were dumb enough to admit it! Tell me who sent you!”

“I’m a  _ mutant! _ ” He said shakily, his hands muffling his words. He peeked between his fingers at her angry expression.  “I-I-I  _ swear  _ it!”

Yumi leaned over the table. “ _ It doesn’t matter!  _ Mutants can be double-agents!  _ Who sent you? _ ”

The door slammed open. Akio jumped and curled into himself at the loud noise, hiding his face behind his hands.

“The  _ hell  _ is this?” demanded Levitan harshly, gesturing at the way Yumi was standing over Akio, who was cowering in his chair.

“He’s a  _ spy! _ ” said Yumi, pointing at Akio, who had his arms wrapped tightly around his knees. “He used to work for Monsoon and-”

“ _ I know he did! _ ” they roared. “He ain’t no  _ spy  _ you dumb  _ fuck! _ ”

Yumi was startled into silence.

Akio whimpered and hugged his knees a bit tighter. He was visibly shaking.

Levitan let out a breath. He stepped over to Akio, hand hovering over his shoulder. “Akio, can I touch you?”

Akio raised his head. He pushed his fingers under his glasses to wipe away the tears. “Mmhmm.”

Levitan rubbed their hand over his back. “Shh. It’s okay, darlin’. We’ve all been there.”

He sniffled, leaning against their side. Levitan carded his fingers through his hair as his sobs quieted down.

Their gaze snapped over to Yumi, whose blood ran cold at the furious look in Levitan’s eyes.

“We’re done here,” they said in a low voice.

Yumi squared up her shoulders. Her right head was staring out the window, deliberately not making eye contact. “I’m sorry, Levitan. That got out of hand, but-”

“I  _ said _ we’re done here,” said Levitan quietly. “I won’t have you antagonizing Akio or any of my other friends. If you even  _ think  _ about discussing any of this with my son, you’re gonna lose one of your heads.”

“B-but it’s  _ procedure- _ ”

“I don’t give a shit,” growled Levitan. “Akio was once a scientist who worked at Monsoon. He was a mutant and didn’t realize it. When I broke out, I took him with me, and we’ve been together ever since, yadda yadda, character development. He was recently recaptured by Monsoon and  _ tortured  _ and  _ interrogated just like this _ , and I don’t need you dragging this up for him to deal with.  _ Got it? _ ”

Yumi shut her mouth and nodded. “I apologize.”

“Good.” Levitan took Akio’s hand and guided him to his feet. “Then we’re done here. Thank you for understanding.”

Yumi gave a sigh and looked away. “No problem.”

Akio threw his arms around Levitan, his face pressed into their shoulder. Levitan pressed their hands into his back and murmured comforts softly under their breath as they pulled him from the room.

Before they exited, Levitan shot one last look at Yumi that sent a chill down her spine. She privately vowed to never again cross Levitan the wrong way.

 

Yumi had set Levitan and Akio up in their own little trailer. It was small and cramped and packed to the brim with old maps and books, but the bed was soft and the bathroom was tiny but clean.

Akio brushed his teeth and stared at his reflection. Levitan’s oversized t-shirt slipped from his shoulder, and his glasses were put on the side table for the night, already. His palms still felt clammy, and he’d felt jumpy all evening. Every raised voice set him on edge, every clink of machinery or screech of metal on metal made him flinch and his heart start to pound. The whirring in Hawke’s mechanical arm had become too much for him to handle so he’d had to leave the room.

He spat in the sink, put the toothbrush aside, and splashed a little water in his face. He gave a sigh, closed his eyes, and dragged his hands down his face. He firmly told himself to  _ get it together. _

“You okay?”

He jumped and whirled on his heel, fists clenched at his sides.

Levitan was leaning against the doorway, wearing boxers and a loose tank top with nothing underneath. They looked concerned at his frightened expression.

“Hey,” they said soothingly. “Sorry I startled you. Are you alright?”

“I-I’m fine,” he said tightly. He forced his shoulders to relax.

“I know what happened,” said Levitan. “You were triggered, weren’t you?”

“I… what?”

“Triggered.” They snapped their fingers. “Somethin’ happened, and it felt like… you were back  _ there,  _ right?”

He nodded once, lips pressed tight together.

“It happens,” they said. “I’ve had it happen, too. It’s just… somethin’ you gotta live with.”

“But… why?”

“PTSD,” they said, “Or other reasons, sometimes. It’s not terrible, and after awhile… you get pretty good at avoiding triggers.”

“What’re… yours?”

“Well,” they said slowly, rolling the question around in their head, “For a long time it was needles. Sharp things, stuff like that. Even pins, I couldn’t stand to touch them or look at ‘em, not even on TV. I managed to work past it, I got lotsa piercings and tattoos, so I made a positive association. Does that make sense?”

“Yeah, I think so.”

Levitan tapped their chin as they thought. “Nowadays, it’s mostly just… danger. Gunshots, screams, things like that. It can be useful, it puts me in the fight or flight mindset right away, but… sometimes I’ll hallucinate or be triggered by somethin’ on TV, which ain’t the best.”

Fight or flight, that's exactly what he’d been feeling all evening. Akio gave a sigh and leaned against the sink. “Jeez. I’m kinda fucked up.”

“Of course you are, hon,” said Levitan, stepping closer. They cupped his cheek and tilted his chin up to look at them. “What happened to you was awful. You ain’t gonna be able to brush that off overnight.”

Akio leaned his head into their hand, gripping their wrist to hold their arm in place. “Right. It’ll take awhile.”

“You’re not the only one, darlin’,” said Levitan. “Lotsa people here got their own issues to deal with. I’m a regular who’s-who of mental problems, myself.”

“Like… what?”

They made a face. “Oh, Christ. I’ve been depressed on and off for large chunks of time. Suicidal, even… but you can guess how well that worked out.” They gave a hollow laugh.

Akio suddenly felt really shitty for bringing this up for them. “Lev, if you don’t wanna talk about it, we can-”

“No, it’s fine,” they said. They let their hand drop to his shoulder. “For me, the big one is PTSD. Not too odd, ‘round here. My life has been pretty royally shitty. I have a lotta shit to work through, still. I hallucinate because of it, and…” Their expression fell. “Sometimes I… lose myself.”

Akio didn’t really understand. He looked up at them.

“I should have told you this sooner,” they said, every aspect of their body language and expression screaming reluctance, “But… there wasn’t really a right time, and I didn’t wanna bring it up just after you got back, but…”

“But…?”

“After you were taken,” said Levitan quietly. “I lost myself. For a bit. Very… violently.”

Akio felt his stomach turn. “Oh god. W-what happened?”

“Those Monsoon workers never stood a chance,” they said, not looking him in the eye. They pulled their hand away and hung their head. Akio could feel the shame coming off of them in waves. “I tore them apart with my bare hands. I murdered them in cold blood. The bullets hit me, but I stayed on my feet, I didn’t even feel ‘em. I ripped out eyes, tore out throats, broke limbs and left ‘em bleedin’ in the gutter to die a slow death. I-I dunno how many people I killed, it’s all a blur of red, but I couldn’t get the blood out from under my nails for  _ days. _ ” They let out a long breath. “I was on autopilot. I couldn’t stop myself. When you were taken from me, and I couldn’t do a damn thing ‘bout it, I just… fuck, I dunno. I lost it.”

Akio didn’t know what to do. He’d known that Levitan had killed people, he’d even seen it, but… the way they described it, it almost made them sound like… an  _ animal.  _ He was forced to admit that thinking of him that way scared him. He prayed that he would never see them in that state… but part of him didn’t think he’d be that lucky.

“Go ahead. Say it.” Levitan’s eyes were slightly watery. “I know you wanna.”

“Say what?” he asked, his voice hoarse. 

“Tell me I’m awful,” they said, expecting the worst. Their voice was slightly choked. “Tell me that I’m a monster, an animal. Ask me how I can do those things, and then make that weird face you do when things don’t make sense when I say  _ I don’t know. _ I don’t have an answer for you. This is just… how I am.” They looked at their hands, picking at their cuticles. “I told you that I ain’t a good person, Akio. I feel so shitty for draggin’ you into my world of violence and bullshit.”

Akio immediately took back the thought that he’d had a few moments ago. He gripped their hands and held them in his. “Levitan, I’m not gonna say any of that to you. I care about you, the stuff you’ve been through and the things you’ve done when backed into a corner don’t matter to me.”

“Akio, I-”

“I’m not a good person, either,” he said firmly. “Nobody’s perfect. We all have our own baggage, our own flaws and fuck-ups. What matters is that we’re here for each other… right?”

“... Right.”

Akio didn’t like the way they avoided his gaze. His heart sank when he realized what they were thinking about.

“Do you… want to stop this?”

“What?” they asked sharply.

He winced. “This. Whatever we have. Dating, I guess?”

“... No,” they admitted. They finally linked their fingers with his. “I really don’t. You make me feel good about myself. You know how goddamn  _ rare  _ that is?”

“Well,” he said, sliding closer. “You make me feel  _ special. _ That’s pretty rare for me, too.”

“I guess that means… we’re good for each other, huh?”

“So far it seems like it,” he said. “I haven’t been this happy in…” He drifted off, realizing that maybe he couldn’t ever think of a time he’d been so happy or felt so  _ alive. _

Levitan didn’t say anything. They were trying to think about the last time  _ they’d  _ felt like this. Not for… well, not for a long, long time.

“I guess that does mean we’re good for each other,” said Akio.

Levitan was forced to agree. “It ain’t always gonna be this easy, darlin’. We’re gonna have our ups and downs.” Probably next time something  _ unsavoury  _ about them came to the light, they figured. “We still got some kinks to work out, but yeah. I think we are good for each other.”

“All  _ kinds  _ of kinks,” he said cheekily.

Levitan finally gave a laugh  as he wrapped his arms around them and tucked himself in close. They ran their fingers through his hair. “Fuck, you’re so sweet. You always feel so nice pressed against me.”

“Let’s get into bed,” he said. His hand slid up to their chest and cupped their breast. “I wanna snuggle with you.”

“ _ Ack!  _ Grabby.” They batted his hand away. 

“Can’t help it,” he said, lowering his body so his cheek was pressed against their breast. “Your chest is really nice. So is your butt. Fuck it, so is your  _ everything. _ ”

Levitan laughed and pulled him into the other room before pushing him down on the cot. He chuckled when Levitan playfully pounced on him, straddling his hips and pinning his wrists down.

“I think your  _ everything  _ is nice too, darlin’,” said Levitan.

“Um,” said Akio, tugging against their hands. His expression was pensive and vulnerable. “Do you mind… moving your hands?”

“Sorry,” they said hastily. They planted their hands on either side of his head, instead. “Better?”

“Much.” He smiled at them. “So… does this mean we’re staying together?”

“As long as you want me, baby,” they said. They tugged up his t-shirt and pushed it up his chest. They slid down his body and planted a kiss on his stomach, making him giggle.

“Does that mean I’m, uh, you’re boyfriend?” he asked shyly.

“I sure hope so,” they said, their heart absolutely  _ melting  _ at the adorable way he said that. They flopped down onto the blankets and gathered him up in their arms.

He immediately cuddled up. He wasn’t in the mood for sex, he just wanted to be surrounded by Levitan’s warmth. “So… what would I call you? You’re not my boyfriend or my girlfriend, really.”

“Partner,” they said. “That’s a good one, I’ve used it before.”

“Like… partner in crime?”

“Fuck, you’re such a nerd.” They ran their fingers through his hair, ruffling it playfully. “I like significant other. SO for short. Sounds kinda special.”

“What about  _ lover? _ ” he asked teasingly.

Levitan rolled their eyes and huffed. “ _ Ugh.  _ Makes it sound like all we do is fuck.”

“We  _ sometimes  _ do other stuff,” he said, vowing to stow the word “lover” away for an occasion that would  _ most definitely  _ embarrass the crap out of Levitan. “So… I’m your boyfriend, you’re my significant other?”

“Hmm.” Levitan rested their cheek on top of his head. Their nose was buried in his hair, and he smelled really sweet. The weight of his arm around their body was comforting. 

They realized then and there that they were making one of the most selfish decisions of their life as they firmly decided that  _ damn  _ the consequences, they desperately wanted to be with Akio. They didn’t care what they were putting in jeopardy, they didn’t want to give up the feeling of his body pressed against theirs, the kindness of his words or the sweetness of his kisses.

Part of them knew that this was a bad and stupid decision, but most of their life had been made of bad and stupid decisions. Why should they start giving a fuck about it, now?

“Yeah,” they said. “Partners. Significant others.” They loved how those words sounded.

“Cool.” His voice cracked awkwardly when he said that, but he could hardly care.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HEY GUYS please please PLEASE tell me if I messed up any of the stuff I talked about in this chapter, it's really important to me that I be accurate.
> 
> Also, happy new year, y'all!


	11. Forest Paths

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan has a fun time. Akio fucks up pretty royally. Ryan once again tries to lay on the moves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: blood, brief character death

Ryan had taken the time to explore the mutant base. It was much more sprawled out than he’d expected. He found little trails through the forest that led to hideouts, bunkers, and lookout towers. He found a large barn, this time it was full of animals. There were two cows, five sheep, a bunch of chickens, a duck, three horses and a foal. There was a large plot of tilled land that was mostly dead considering that it was January, but he could see the places where there would be tomatoes, cucumbers, and peas.

He spent a very happy two hours petting the larger animals, fluffing up the feathers of the chickens, and trying to catch the duck. It was the only animal that wasn’t in a pen of any kind, and it always managed to waddle  _ just  _ out of reach, quacking hysterically as he tried to grab it.

Ryan huffed and leaned against a large bale of hay. The duck quacked and hopped over to a low dish to dip his beak in. Ryan couldn’t help snorting at the funny sound he made.

“Hey, you’re Levitan’s kid, right?”

Ryan suppressed the groan at being referred to as “Levitan’s kid” but he turned to see the source of the voice. It was Junjie, the guy who’d gotten their beds together, yesterday. The colours on his face seemed to have shifted and changed over the last couple days.

“Yep,” he said, jabbing a thumb towards his chest, “That’s me, Ryan Reeves.”

“Phew. You’re living under a big shadow, huh?” Junjie picked up the empty water jug from the chicken enclosure and walked over to the hose to refill it.

“Tell me about it.” Ryan looked back over at the duck.

“Were you trying to catch Mikey?” asked Junjie, amused.

Ryan gave him a bewildered look as he filled the jug with water. “... Mikey?”

“The duck.”

“Oh.” Ryan looked back over to the duck as it pattered around on the straw. “I guess so. Where’d you guys get ‘im?”

“Oh, we didn’t get him. He just kinda showed up and stuck around. He won’t let people catch him, you just gotta put some bread or crackers in your hand and hope he waddles over.”

“Huh.”

“Here.” Junjie put the filled water jug back into the chicken coop, then walked over and handed Ryan a piece of bread. “Tear it up into little chunks.”

Ryan plopped down onto a pile of hay and tore the bread into shreds. He put some on his hand and held it out for Mikey the duck.

Mikey noticed immediately and hopped over. He snapped up the first few crumbs of bread, then when it was gone, he bit Ryan’s finger.

“ _ Ow! _ ” He yanked his hand away. Mikey waddled off, quacking in what must have been a gleeful manner.

Junjie chuckled. He was picking out a tangle in the mane of the chestnut horse.  “Sorry, should’a warned you. He tends to do that.”

Ryan popped his sore finger into his mouth and got back to his feet. He heard a soft bang from far away, like a gunshot.

“What was that?” he asked.

“Levitan practicing with a rifle,” said Junjie. He scratched the horse behind the ears. “Just target practice. I think they’re teaching Akio how to do it.”

“Yikes, that’s gonna be funny.” Ryan brushed the straw from his jeans and jogged out the barn door. “Catch ya later!”

He could hear Junjie’s chuckles as he left the barn.

Ryan had found the target practice area during his exploration, so he knew which path to take. He almost tripped over a tree root as he ran along the forest trail, kicking aside old bullet shells as he came upon the clearing. There were half a dozen other people there, either cleaning their weapons or wrestling together. Ryan could barely tear his eyes away from the ten foot tall mutant with forearms thicker than his own thigh. When the guy turned, Ryan saw that he only had one eye set in the middle of his forehead.

Levitan and Akio were standing a dozen paces away from a target. Lev held a rifle in their hand, and they had a handgun on their hip.

“Hey, son,” said Levitan as Ryan walked up. “Here for a refresher lesson?”

“Nah,” he said. “Just here to watch Akio fuck up.”

Akio frowned. “I  _ resent  _ that.”

“Well,” said Levitan, unable to hide their amusement. “Wanna show him how it’s done?”

“Hell yeah I do!” Ryan held out his hands. “Gimmie!”

“He can shoot a gun?” asked Akio with wide eyes as Levitan handed the rifle over to him.

“I taught him when he was eight.”

“You… what?”

“Dude. Did you forget that we’re in  _ Texas? _ ” Ryan cocked the rifle. “Bolt action, like the one you taught me on.” He hefted it to his shoulder and put his eye to the scope.

He lined up his mark, a wooden cut-out of a human figure with red concentric circles painted on its chest, put his finger on the trigger, and fired one round. It struck one of the inner circles on the target. He cocked the rifle and handed it back to Levitan.

“Easy peasy,” he said with a grin.

“Could’a been a bit more accurate, but not bad, Squirt.” Levitan tousled his hair with their free hand. “Pint-sized, wanna hold it?”

“Um.” Akio’s discomfort was palpable. He reluctantly received the rifle with both hands, holding it awkwardly away from his body.

“ _ Hey! Levitan! _ ” Two younger mutants, one of whom limped along with a crutch, and the other who had a missing arm, waved them over. “We wanna ask you something!”

“Comin’!” they called. They looked back at Akio and pinched his cheek. “Back in a flash, darlin’.”

“Okay,” he said. He tried to hold the gun out for them to take, but they didn’t notice as they jogged over to speak to the other mutants.

Ryan watched, unable to keep the stupid smile off of his face as Akio struggled to figure out a way to hold the weapon. He finally settled on attempting to copy the way Ryan had aimed the gun at the target.

“You’re hopeless,” said Ryan.

Akio shot him a warning look. “Shh. If I do badly enough, Lev will help me… preferably in a way that involves them standing  _ right next to me _ , all warm and strong like they do.”

“ _ Oh my god, _ ” said Ryan. “You’re the  _ worst. _ Is  _ that  _ how you flirt with my parent?”

“That’s not all I do with them,” he mumbled.

“Oh,  _ ew, _ ” he said, banishing that thought from his head  _ forever. _ “I don’t need to know  _ that _ . But seriously, Lev is gonna see right through your bullshit.”

Akio grunted noncommittally.

“You alright there, darlin’?” asked Levitan as they walked back up.

“Having a bit of trouble,” he said innocently. “Can’t figure out how to hold it.”

“Need a hand, sweetheart?” they asked.

“Yes, please.”

Ryan looked disgusted as Levitan gently directed Akio so he could aim properly, their hands on his wrists, their body pressed against his. Akio glanced over his shoulder and gave Ryan a smirk.

_ Ugh.  _ What a little  _ shit. _

“Look through the scope, darlin’.” Levitan’s hands were on Akio’s waist. “You ready?”

“I think so.”

“Alright, pull the trigger.”

The gun went off with a bang. The wood at the edge of the target splintered.

“Good job, darlin’,” said Levitan.

“ _ Hey, _ ” said Ryan, offended. “My shot was  _ way  _ better than that! How come you tell him  _ he  _ did a good job?”

“The secret to getting good grades is fucking the professor,” said Akio. “ _ Trust me. _ ”

“ _ Eugh, _ ” said Ryan, making a face. “Y’all are  _ nasty. _ ”

Levitan snorted. “Alright, that’s the basics of using a gun. Remember, always treat a gun as if it’s loaded.” They took the gun from his hands and held it in a casual and confident grip. “Never point it towards anyone or anything, even if you’re a hundred percent sure the chamber is empty. Got it?”

“Got it,” he said. Levitan handed the rifle back to him, a little bit carelessly. He fumbled a bit, tried to recover, and his grip slipped. He accidentally grabbed at the trigger.

With a bang, the gun went off. The bullet shot up through his jaw and blasted open the back of his skull. Akio crumpled to the ground, limp, and blood began to pool below his corpse.

When the mutants who were sparring saw what had happened, a chorus of shrieks and screams came over the clearing. Ryan immediately burst into loud laughter. All Levitan could do was groan in exasperation.

“What did I  _ just  _ tell you?” they asked Akio’s twitching corpse. “The words were  _ barely  _ outta my mouth!  _ Look where you’re pointin’ the gun! _ ”

“Oh my god!” cried a voice from on the other side of the target practice clearing.

“Holy shit!” said another. “That guy  _ shot  _ himself!”

Ryan was still laughing helplessly. “What… an…  _ idiot! _ ”

The tall mutant with one eye dashed over. “Oh my god… Levitan, I’m so sorry…”

“Don’t be sorry for him,” said Levitan. “He was bein’  _ stupid. _ ”

“You’re in shock,” he said, putting a gentle hand on their shoulder.

They swatted his hand off. “I ain’t in  _ shock!  _ I’m  _ mad! _ ” They jabbed a finger at Akio. “This  _ idiot  _ didn’t  _ listen  _ to me!”

Ryan had  _ tears  _ rolling down his cheeks he was laughing so hard. Fuck, he could always count on Akio Sato to make him laugh until his sides hurt.

“Levitan, we’ll take care of it,” said the tall mutant, “Just let us-”

“No! Just let ‘im be, he’ll be back in a minute.” Levitan huffed and folded their arms and glared down at the bloody body. “Why’re you such a  _ dumbass?! _ First rule in the  _ fuckin’  _ book and you break it! Not only do you  _ break  _ it, but you break it  _ immediately! _ ”

Akio’s foot twitched.

“Fuckin’ idiot, I can’t  _ believe  _ you.” Levitan watched as the bullet wound on his chin began to heal up and scab over before being replaced with fresh skin. “I’m gonna give you a  _ BB gun  _ to work with, next time! Bet you’d shoot your goddamn eye out, too!”

“Levitan, we should leave him,” said the tall mutant.

Akio let out a groan and raised a shaky hand. “Where am I?”

“You  _ idiot! _ ” snapped Levitan. “You scared all these good people half to  _ death  _ by blowin’ your own brains out! Dummy!”

“Shit,” he said, looking up at the tall mutant who was wearing a horrified expression. “Sorry, man.”

“But… you were…” he started.

“Super dead,” he said. “Healing powers. We’re mutants. Dang.”

“I ought’a kick your ass for that stunt!” said Levitan, grabbing the rifle from the ground next to him. “Next time we go on a mission, I’m givin’ you a sharp stick to defend yourself with!”

“Are you gonna  _ punish  _ me for being  _ bad? _ ” he asked coyly.

“ _ Gross! _ ” groaned Ryan.

“Only  _ you  _ would try an’ flirt with me while you’re covered in your own blood,” said Levitan, unable to help their slight smile.

“Psh, you’d do it too.” He patted the ground next to him. “Come sit with me. The sky’s real pretty today, and the dirt is  _ super  _ comfortable.”

“Nope, it’s shower time for you.” Levitan grabbed his hand and pulled him to his feet. “That’s enough for today.”

Akio gave them a silly smile. “Can I get a kiss for doing a good job?”

“You did not do a good job,” said Levitan flatly. “You accidentally killed yourself.”

“Well… can I get a kiss for being cute?” he asked sweetly.

“ _ You’re the actual worst, _ ” said Ryan.

The worst part was, Levitan went with it anyway and planted a soft kiss on the corner of his mouth.

“Gross,” said Ryan again.

“Hey, you should be nicer to me!” said Akio. “I’m dating your parent, doesn’t that kinda make me your dad?”

“ _ No way! _ ” he said, taking a step back so he could make a run for it. “You’re  _ not  _ my dad!”

“How could you say that to your own father?” asked Akio, pretending to be heartbroken.

“ _ Lev, make him stop! _ ” begged Ryan.

Levitan was no use. Their hand was over their face, but Ryan could see the amusement in their eyes between their fingers.

“I’m going,” said Ryan. “ _ Bye! _ ”

“No, son, don’t leave!” cried Akio before giggling into Levitan’s shoulders.

_ Ugh,  _ Akio was  _ the worst! _ Ryan scampered off into the woods. He jogged along the little path, scrambling up a steep hill to the lookout. It was a small tower with a little roof and a ladder that went to the top. His sneakers slipped in the mud as he got to the top of the hill, then slid on the rungs of the ladder as he climbed.

He heaved himself up, and he realized that he wasn’t alone.

“Oh!” Dana snapped her notebook shut with one clawed hand. The cover of the book had  _ Dana De LaVega  _ written in glittery cursive, clearly by Dana’s own hand. Her grey scales shimmered prettily as she shifted her position. “Hi, Ryan.”

“Hey,” said Ryan. He crawled up next to her. It was a tiny lookout, an adult couldn’t stand comfortably in it, but there were a few cushions to sit on. “What’re you doing up here?”

“Enjoying the view.” She looked out over the woods. “I’ve never seen so many trees, before.”

“Pretty nice, huh?” he settled next to her, far more interested in looking at her than at some dumb forest. He really liked her eyes, they were such a pretty colour, and her long black lashes framed them perfectly.

“Yeah,” she said slightly dreamily.

“Not as nice as you,” he said. He hoped that even though he sounded corny, it at least came across as  _ kinda  _ flirty.

Dana didn’t really reply to that. Instead, she said, “I never knew that there was a place where we can be ourselves.”

“Yeah,” said Ryan, letting her direct the conversation.

“I mean,” she said, scraping her glittery claw against the wood to carve a little zigzag pattern. “You can at least blend a  _ little  _ in society. Mutants like me… we just can’t. We’d be put in a zoo, or caught and thrown back in Monsoon the  _ instant  _ somebody noticed that we’re not… normal.”

“Normal is boring, anyhow,” said Ryan cavalierly.

“I just sorta wish that I could be like a regular girl sometimes, y’know?” she said. She tugged her skirt down past her knee.

Before she did, Ryan saw that some of the scales were flaking away. The ones underneath were darker and sleeker. He didn’t mention it.

“I think you’re better than any ol’ Plain Jane,” said Ryan. “Prettier, too.”

Dana didn’t reply, aside from rolling her eyes slightly. She pushed the topic of conversation away from herself and said, “What did you mean when you told Lev that it was too late for you not to have sex?”

“I mean I’m not a virgin,” he said. His ears felt hot.

“Oh?” she asked, her tone begging him to explain.

“Well,” he said, feeling inexplicably embarrassed. “During my travels, I’ve gotten handsy with a few people, y’know? I hung ‘round in New York for about six months while I was getting ready to break Levitan out. Spent most of my time building the laptops and scoping the place out without getting caught, but I did hook up with this one guy. Couple o’ handjobs and blowjobs in the back of his  _ really nice car _ , then we just kinda drifted apart.”

“Oh,” she said. She fiddled with her dark hair. “Is that all?”

“Pretty much,” he said with a shrug. “Why?”

“No reason.”

Ryan wasn’t always the  _ most  _ perceptive person, but he could tell that she didn’t just ask for “no reason”. Something was bugging her, but he figured that if she wanted to tell him what it was she would. He didn’t wanna pressure her or anything like that.

“You sure?” he asked.

“Yeah,” she said, putting up a show of being casual while not meeting his gaze. She turned her notebook over in her hands, tapping her claws on the cover. Ryan loved how they were always painted in such pretty colours. “I’m sure.”

Ryan decided to let it slide. He continued with, “I dunno what Lev’s tryin’ to pull with the “no sex ‘til you’re thirty” bullshit. They can’t be so stupid as to think I’m gonna  _ listen  _ to that crap.”

“Maybe they don’t want you to grow up too fast,” said Dana.

“Well, that’s too bad for them.” Ryan crossed his legs, getting mud on the cushions. “If I wanna date, I’m  _ gonna  _ date. Besides, they’re one to talk. You should’a  _ seen  _ the dopey way Akio was actin’ round Levitan. He was  _ so  _ busy ogling them, he accidentally blew his own brains out with the gun they were trying to teach him to shoot with.”

Dana giggled. “ _ Seriously? _ ”

“Seriously,” he said. “Scared the absolute  _ shit  _ outta all the mutants who didn’t know he was gonna come back.” He chuckled. “Fuck, that was funny. God, those two are such  _ saps. _ ”

“I think it’s kinda cute,” said Dana. “They obviously like each other a whole lot.”

“Yeah, but the less I can think about Levitan having  _ sex _ , the  _ better.  _ Yuck.” He folded his hands behind his head and gave her a sly smile. “I’d rather think about  _ me  _ having sex.”

Dana didn’t say anything to that. She looked a little uncomfortable.

“Well,” said Ryan. “Maybe not even sex. Maybe just kissing.”

“Mm,” she hummed. She tapped her claws on her notebook.

Ryan tried to lay it on a little bit thicker, just to get his point across. “Maybe kissing somebody cute with adorable little horns in her hair while we sit up in a cool lookout thingy.”

“ _ Jesus Christ, I get it, okay? _ ” she snapped.

Ryan was abruptly taken aback. He had thought he was being smooth and sweet, but maybe he’d horribly misjudged the situation. “Uh… what?”

“I get it,” she said with a snarl. “Quit making fun of me!” 

“What?” he asked, confused. “Dana, I’m not-”

She gripped her little notebook in tight hands. “I  _ know  _ I’m ugly and undateable, can you just stop rubbing it in my face?! God! I thought you were my  _ friend! _ ”

“D-Dana, I  _ am  _ your friend, just-”

“All you’ve been doing for the past few days has been bragging about how hot you are and teasing me!” she said. Ryan’s heart damn near stopped when he saw the tears in her golden eyes. “You keep calling me cute, and pretty, and telling me all those things when I’m so obviously  _ not!  _ So can you please  _ stop?! _ ”

“Dana, I wasn’t teasing!” he protested, hating how his voice cracked and hating that she was crying. “I  _ promise! _ I was just trying to-”

“Trying to what?” she demanded. “Trying to lie to me so I’d feel better about how ugly I look?  _ Look at this! _ ” She held up her hands. Her knuckles were large and knobbly, her fingers were short and tipped with claws that she’d filed into bluntness. The backs of her hands were scaled, but her palms were soft to the touch, like her throat and underbelly. “No amount of glittery nail polish can hide that I have  _ claws! _ I’m  _ part dinosaur,  _ Ryan! Nothing’s gonna change that, and dinosaurs aren’t beautiful!”

Ryan was speechless. He desperately wanted to comfort her, tell her that she  _ was  _ beautiful and that he wished that she believed that, but instead all he could do was quietly finish his sentence.

“... I was just trying to flirt with you,” he mumbled, feeling about as pathetic as Akio acted.

Dana opened her mouth to retort, but she stopped, her jaw hanging open. She closed her mouth, tilted her head, and looked at him curiously. “Wait… you  _ were? _ ”

“Yeah,” he said. He was sweating, and he decided not to take off his jacket so Dana wouldn’t see his pit stains. “In a really awful and obvious sort of way.”

“Oh.” She sounded surprised, but Ryan couldn’t read her mood beyond that.

Ryan’s heart was pounding a mile a minute and he wanted to exit  _ immediately _ . “Well, this was a cool chat, but I’m gonna go now. Bye.” He crawled over to the edge of the lookout and stuck one foot out.

“ _ That’s not where the ladder is, dummy! _ ” Dana grabbed him by the back of his belt and yanked him back onto the cushions.

“I knew that,” he said. He was flat on his back, and Dana was staring down at him in a way that made him feel hot under the collar. “I just have the urge to jump from this treehouse right now.”

Dana sighed and drew a stray hair behind her ear. “You’re a dope.”

“I’m cool with that.”

“So… are you really flirting with me?” she asked tentatively, almost afraid of the answer.

“Yeah,” he said earnestly. “I am!”

“But… why?”

“Because I think you’re really nice, really fun, really cool, and really pretty,” he said. “I like being with you. If you want me to stop, though, I can-”

“No! No.” She shook her head. “I don’t want that.”

His heart leapt. “Oh. So I can-”

“Y-yeah, you can.” She poked her fingers together. “I guess I should try and flirt back, huh?”

“Only if you wanna.”

“I’ve never flirted with anyone before.”

“It’s easy,” he said. “It’s just like… getting to know each other, teasing just a little, but being sweet and having a fun time while we do it, y’know?”

“Is that it?” she asked. “Jeez, movies always make it seem like such a big deal.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he said. “How about we just have fun with each other and do stuff. Is that alright?”

“Yeah, alright,” she said. When she smiled, her pointed teeth gleamed. She saw Ryan staring at her mouth and quickly hid her teeth behind her hand.

Ryan took her hand without thinking. Her palm was soft to the touch, her fingers were thick and unyielding in his. Before he could chicken out, he leaned in and pecked her on the cheek. Her scales felt cool to the touch against his lips.

When he pulled away, Dana looked surprised. Her eyes were wide, and still slightly red-rimmed from her earlier crying.

“Um.” He suddenly felt a wave of embarrassment wash over him, and all attempts at being suave vanished in an instant. “I gotta go.”

“What?” she asked, amused at the way his voice cracked. “Where?”

“Barn. Gotta catch the duck. That duck sure is wily, but I ain’t bout to be outsmarted by no waterfowl.” He put one foot out over the edge of the tower. “Bye, Dana! See you at supper!”

“Ryan, that’s not the-”

He flung himself from the top of the lookout station, right into a bush. He scrambled to his feet, twigs in his hair and ignoring his twisted ankle, as he dashed away from the tower. He could hear Dana giggling, and he decided that he really liked the sound of her laugh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bit of a fluff chapter, but it was fun anyhow!
> 
> thanks for reading! my tumblr is runaway-toons if you wanna hmu


	12. The World Has Gotten Bigger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levitan and Akio learn some things about Monsoon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Akio's NASTY thoughts, other mutants being slutty, allusions to abuse

Levitan was happy to be back. They’d missed the land, the feel of the air, and the sweet sound of accents like theirs. They’d missed the drives on dusty highways and the clear blue sky. No matter where they went in this great wide world, and they’d been many places, Austin would always be their home.

It was a warm afternoon. They wore a button down shirt cuffed up to the elbows, the collar open a few buttons. They sat on a lawn chair in front of the trailer they shared with Akio, drinking a lukewarm beer.

“Hey, Lev!” Akio hopped out of the trailer wearing a huge silly grin. “Check out what I found!”

“What?” they asked, squinting at him, the sun shining right in their eyes.

He produced something from behind his back with a snicker. In his hands, he held a pair of cowboy boots. They were made from old, worn leather, but had obviously been cared for because they were in good condition.

Levitan smiled. “What’re those for?”

“Found ‘em,” he said. “Wondered if they’d fit you.”

“Lessee.” They held out their hand.

Akio passed them over and watched as Levitan kicked off their combat boots and set them neatly aside. They pulled the cowboy boots on, their jeans sliding down over top, and got to their feet. “Mm, nice fit. They’re all broken in, too. Where’d you find these?”

“I-in our trailer,” stuttered Akio, suddenly bright red.

Levitan gave him a slightly sly smile. “What’s with the look on your face?”

“Nothing,” he said hastily, occupying his gaze with the dirt.

Levitan stepped over, their thumbs in their belt loops, and stood toe-to-toe with him. Akio couldn’t help looking up at them.

“You sure?” they asked, their smile growing wide and cocky. They brought their hand up to tuck a stray hair behind his ear.

Akio held their wrist and turned his head to plant a kiss on their palm. “I just like you a whole lot,” he murmured, his lips touching their skin.

“I like you a whole lot too, darlin’,” said Levitan. They kissed his cheek, their other hand sliding around to rest on his lower back, pulling him against them.

Akio chuckled as Levitan dropped kisses on his neck, their other hand squeezing his ass. “No teeth, please.”

“Aw.” Levitan pulled away, only to place a kiss on his mouth. His fingers tangled in their short hair, it was longer and just a bit shaggy since it hadn’t been cut in a few months. Levitan could feel the erection pressed against them. They broke the kiss with a snicker.

“You _really_ like those boots, huh?” they said, giving his ass another squeeze.

“I, well,” said Akio, flustered.

They were right out in front of their trailer. From where the two of them were standing, they could see Naomi, Hawke and James on lawn chairs, and another group of mutants chatting nearby. Not caring about their volume and wanting to embarrass Akio a bit just for fun, Levitan said loudly, “Maybe one o’ these days I should fuck you while wearin’ all o’ this, and you’re all spread out before me and moanin’ like a whore, huh?”

A few heads turned. James wolf-whistled from his spot on the chair. Levitan had expected Akio to bury his face in his hands with embarrassment, but instead he got a funny starry-eyed look on his face.

“Oh god, _would you?_ ” he murmured, gripping their belt with sweaty fingers.

“I _would_ , darlin’,” they said at the same volume, intent on making him blush and stutter again. “Everyone here knows that I _own_ your ass, y’know. Bet the others heard me make you scream when I was fuckin’ your brains out.”

“ _God I hope so,_ ” he whispered, barely loud enough for them to hear.

“ _What?_ ” they asked with a laugh. “Oh my god, really?”

“I, uh, no! Sorry! Ack.” He looked away and rubbed his eyes under his glasses.

“Holy hell,” said Levitan with the biggest grin. “Bein’ watched gets you off. That’s some kinky shit, darlin’.”

“I’m not _kinky,_ Lev!” he protested.

“Aw, darlin’, don’t worry ‘bout it none.” They lightly pinched his cheek. “I won’t tell no one if you don’t want me to. On the _other_ hand, I could find someone willin’ to be a third party next time I suck your cock, James is always happy to lend a helpin’ hand. Or maybe we could get a _video camera_ an’-”

Akio groaned and pushed his face into Levitan’s shoulder.

Levitan laughed aloud and ruffled his hair. “Maybe another time?”

“ _Maybe,_ ” he mumbled, his voice muffled by their shoulder.

“Ahem.”

Levitan turned to see Yumi standing there patiently.

“Oh, hello.” Levitan turned, holding Akio to their side. “Can I help you?”

“Yes,” said Yumi. “I hope you don’t mind if I trouble you for a quick meeting.”

“How quick?”

Yumi hesitated. “Like twenty minutes, maybe? I just want to brief you on some recent events that have occurred since you’ve been gone from the resistance. Thought you’d wanna be all caught up.”

“Alright, sure,” said Levitan. They hugged their arm protectively around Akio.

“Let’s go to the meeting room so we can be comfortable.” Yumi gestured for the two of them to follow.

On their way to the meeting room, they passed James, Naomi, and Hawke. Hawke was reading a book. James had a young lady with wild pink hair on his knee, and Naomi was chatting up a young man who was very well built and she was very obviously pushing up her cleavage for him to see.

“Man-whore,” said Levitan to James as they walked by. “Shame on you for harassing young ladies, you dirty old man.”

James chuckled. His hand was on the thigh of the girl with the pink hair. “Like you’re one to talk!”

Levitan shook their head as they followed Yumi into the large building with the meeting room.

“So,” said Yumi, taking a seat at the head of the long table. She rested her elbows on the table and folded her fingers together. “Akio, I would like to once again apologize for the way that I treated you when you first arrived here. I was wrong to jump to conclusions so quickly, but we almost had an _incident_ in the past where a mutant betrayed the resistance to become a Monsoon informant. We caught and dealt with him before much damage could be done, but new precautions have been put in place since then.”

“I understand,” he said. His fingers were locked with Akio’s. “Thank you.”

“Levitan,” said Yumi, turning both of her heads to look at them, “I’m sorry if I haven’t been particularly trusting of you. If… if by some _freak_ chance, you’d turned against us, it would all be over.”

Levitan nodded. “Of course.”

“That said,” said Yumi, putting her notepad in front of her, “Let’s dive in. The world has grown a lot since you severed yourself from the resistance. Things are more complicated than ever, which I assume you know based on the fact that Monsoon has grown to encompass New York and Los Angeles as well as the original base here in Austin.”

“I was… very surprised,” said Levitan quietly.

“Based on our latest intel,” said Yumi’s left head, while the other was occupied with writing notes, “The site at Monsoon LA was swarmed by the police immediately after you left. However, the site was cleaned up, the bodies were disposed of, and all of the contents of the Monsoon laboratory were disposed of by a quote “third party” before any of the evidence could be documented aside from photographs.” Yumi shifted her papers and produced a manilla folder. “Many of these photos were taken by citizens or reporters and were put on the internet.” She opened the file folder and dumped the photos on the desk.

Levitan looked away. They already knew what they were going to see.

Akio couldn’t tear his eyes away. He felt sick. The photos were… disgusting. He’d never seen so much blood in his entire life, maybe only in horror movies. He tentatively picked up a photo of a corpse with its eyes gouged and its throat lacerated with Levitan’s blunt fingers. He turned it over and pushed it aside, feeling weak.

“Of course, scandals have run wild in the newspapers and online,” said Yumi. “It’s been titled “The Los Angeles Massacre”. Nobody’s been able to figure out who was behind it, and we’re very lucky for that. On the other hand, it’s possible that Monsoon is so interested in covering its own ass on a corporate level that it’s trying to cover everything up as quickly as possible.”

Levitan pinched their brow. “Fuck. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” said Yumi. “It’s true that what you did was risky and dangerous, but you got one good thing out of it, aside from snuffing the lives of those bastards. People have started asking questions about the establishment in question, wondering what it is that they’re hiding, and why the police haven’t been allowed to investigate this crime. Even the FBI has been denied access to the evidence, and that’s really fishy. Rumours are flying wild online, and those illuminati conspiracy nuts are going off the hook, but people are talking about it and that’s vital. One more step towards exposure to the world and eradicating the institution.”

“Why don’t we come forward about this whole thing?” asked Akio. “Tell the presses about Monsoon?”

“You think we haven’t tried that?” asked Levitan. “Mutants have run articles in newspapers for _years_.”

“Online chat rooms, websites, and online articles are more important than ever,” said Yumi.

“The trouble is,” said Levitan, “Nobody takes us _seriously._ Anyone who hears shit about it thinks we’re like those conspiracy nuts.”

“You’d think people would be more willing to listen considering that this is hardly the first time human beings have been experimented on,” said Yumi as she gathered up the scattered photos. “It does sound very far fetched when compared to the Tuskegee syphilis experiment and thinks of that sort.”

“Monsoon has the government and the FBI in their back pocket,” said Levitan. “The company has been around for long enough to be able to establish connections deep within those organizations, not to mention _monetary_ incentive. At least, that’s as far as we’ve been able to extrapolate with limited information. No mutant has been able to penetrate the inner workings of Monsoon, not on a corporate level.” They glanced at Yumi and cocked an eyebrow. “Unless that’s changed since I’ve been gone?”

“No,” said Yumi regretfully. “It hasn’t.”

“Too bad. We gotta take these bastards down.”

“You’re telling me,” said Yumi with a huff. “We’re just getting together the manpower to launch some more investigations.”

“I see,” said Levitan. They drummed their fingers on the table.

“Will we be able to count on you for your assistance?” asked Yumi.

“In all honesty,” they said slowly, “My obligations are very conflicted, at the moment. However, you can count on me to be participating in the resistance as much as I possibly can.”

Akio squeezed their fingers.

“I appreciate that,” said Yumi. “I understand that after leaving Monsoon so recently and that debacle in LA, you might want to distance yourself from the battlefront for a little while. There are some other jobs that I can give you that will allow you to participate but be a little farther away from the action.”

“I can handle a little action,” said Levitan. “I ain’t averse to knockin’ heads together.”

“Well, if there’s any way you can pull money or expertise into the camp, that would be excellent,” said Yumi. “Teach the younger mutants some valuable skills like working with weapons, or bring back some money so we can feed the hungry mouths ‘round here.”

“I might be able to work somethin’ out,” said Levitan.

“Additionally,” said Yumi as she flipped through her pages. “We’ve been receiving quite a bit of foreign intel, not all of it is in English, and I could use a translator to help ease the language transition for some newbies who’ve recently arrived to America.”

“Wait,” said Levitan with a slight frown. “What kind of _foreign_ intel?”

“Just some new details about the exact location of Monsoon Rio and some escaped mutants who are currently trying to start their own resistance down south and are reaching out for others like them,” said Yumi. “I came across it in an online forum, and we’ve been exchanging correspondence for the past few months.”

Levitan’s hand was shaking. “Monsoon… _Rio?_ ”

Akio felt a knot in the pit of his stomach. This wasn’t good.

Yumi raised her eyebrows. “You… didn’t know?”

“I-I thought Monsoon was only in the United States,” said Levitan. Their voice had a tremor in it that made Akio squeeze their fingers tighter. “H-how many others are there?”

“We’re still finding out,” said Yumi with a pained expression. “Most of our foreign intelligence is fairly new.”

“How many do you know about?” they asked. “I have to know.”

“Monsoon Rio has been on the rise,” said Yumi, looking down a list. “We don’t know too much about them yet, aside from that it seems to be sponsored by wealthy families. Monsoon Canada is still _very_ small and it’s located in the Northwest Territories, above the arctic circle, so it would be a _pain_ to get to, even if we knew where it was exactly. Monsoon London has been around for much longer than we’d thought and seems to primarily specialize in nanotechnology more than mutation studies. We _think_ that there are Monsoon locations in Moscow and somewhere in the desert in South Africa, but it’s still unknown. We actually have a young man here from Monsoon Japan, which we just found out has been around since the nineteen-eighties, and his English isn’t so good so we’ve had a bit of trouble communicating with him.”

Levitan had their head in their hands by the time Yumi finished with her list.

Akio’s heart had almost stopped at that last sentence.

“Monsoon… Japan?” he asked with a strange note in his voice.

“What, you know something about it?” asked Yumi curiously.

“I… no, not at all,” he said. “I was born in Japan, and I’d just _assumed_ that I’d somehow been brought over from America as a baby, but…”

Levitan slammed their fist on the table, startling him into silence.

The room was quiet for a moment, aside from Levitan staring blankly at the table.

“Lev,” said Akio softly, touching them on the shoulder. “What’s wrong?”

“What’s _wrong?_ ” they asked. They gave a bitter laugh. “What’s _wrong_ is that there are a _minimum_ of _four_ other Monsoon locations around the world, more than likely there’s _six or more_ , and… and I thought…” They growled with frustration and banged their hands on the table again. “ _I can’t believe I was so fuckin’ naive!_ ”

Yumi gave a sigh. “I’m sorry that you had to find out this way, Levitan. It was quite a shock for us, too.”

Levitan took a deep breath. They were trembling. “I-I’ll help you in any way that I can.”

“Of course,” said Yumi. They looked away from Levitan’s expression of barely hidden heartbreak. “I think that’s enough for today. For now, if you like you can talk to Naoki Ando and take notes on what he says about Monsoon Japan. He lives in the green trailer with Rhoda.”

“Thank you,” said Levitan.

“I-I speak Japanese,” said Akio hastily. “I’ll talk to him.”

“Thank you very much,” said Yumi. “That’s a lot to process. I should ensure that the others you came with are up to date, as well.”

“Alright, thanks,” said Levitan, their voice hoarse. They stood and quickly left the room, their cowboy boots clicking on the floor before they went out the front door.

Akio was on their heels after them in an instant. He finally caught up to their long strides when they were standing behind the barn.

“Lev, are you alright?” he asked.

“ _No!_ ” they said, making him jump back. “No, I’m not alright!” Tears welled up in their eyes and they wiped them away on their wrist. “I-I can’t fuckin’ believe this shit! W-whenever I-I think things are gettin’ better, or I’m gettin’ my feet under myself once again, someone fuckin’ pulls the rug out from under me! _Fuck!_ ” They whipped around and punched the side of the barn. The wood splintered under their knuckles, leaving them bloody.

“Lev, don’t do that!” Akio grabbed their hand and held it in both of theirs.

Levitan sobbed, and Akio heart hurt to see them like this. When they spoke, their voice was thick with emotion.

“I thought I had things under control,” they said slowly, their voice choked. “I-I guess Yumi was right. The world’s gotten a whole lot bigger since I’ve been gone.”

Akio looked down at their hand as their knuckles scabbed over and healed right before his eyes. “I’m sorry, Levitan. I wish I could help.” He kissed their bruised knuckles and wrapped his arms around them in a tight hug.

Levitan leaned their cheek against the top of his head, one hand in his hair and the other wrapped around his shoulders, holding him close. “Thanks, pint-sized. You’re already helpin’.”

Akio was content to let them hold him and play with his hair as long as they needed to. Levitan stroked the fine hairs at the back of his neck and hummed softly as they gathered themself. Akio rubbed soothing circles on their back and shoulders.

“You’re a doll, y’know,” said Levitan. They finally pulled away and cupped his cheeks. “I’m lucky to have you.”

“I’m lucky to have you, too.”

Levitan leaned down and kissed him. It was soft and sweet. They pulled away slowly.

“I need to go make myself busy, darlin’,” they said looking away. “I’m gonna… go chop wood. Alone. I hope you don’t mind.”

“Of course not. You need to think, and I gotta go act as a translator.” He took their hand and kissed their knuckles. “I’ll see you tonight, okay?”

“Okay.” They looked relieved that he didn’t try to push them. They stepped away, and gave a slightly weak smile before they disappeared around the side of the barn.

Akio walked back over to the cluster of trailers and small houses and immediately found the green trailer. He passed Hawke on the way. He still sat on the lawn chair, reading his book.

“Hey,” said Akio as he paused beside him. “Where’d Naomi and James go?”

“Naomi grabbed herself a couple of cute guys and went to go have some fun,” said Hawke without looking up. “James is off being a sugar daddy with no sugar, ‘cause he’s just as broke as the rest of us.”

Akio couldn’t help laughing.

“Yep,” said Hawke as he turned the page. “As soon as Naomi meets a new mutant, the _first_ question she asks me is “hey Hawke, think that they’ll wanna fuck me”?” He imitated Naomi’s voice in a squeaky and obnoxious way.

“Well,” said Akio, “What do you usually say?”

“I usually say that she’s beautiful and anyone who isn’t asexual like yours truly would love to hit that ass,” said Hawke. He still didn’t look at Akio. “She loves to hear that.”

“I’ll see you around, buddy,” said Akio with a laugh as he turned to walk away.

“Hey, if you see Naomi tell her that the heater in our trailer is broken,” said Hawke.

“Yeah, sure thing,” Akio called as he walked down the little dirt road.

The green trailer had grass growing up around the tires and a little flowerpot on the steps with some tall wildflowers growing in it. Akio knocked his knuckles on the door.

“Coming!” called a voice. The door opened, to reveal Rhoda, wearing a pink and purple apron. “Oh, hello dear! Can I help you?”

“I’m here to talk with Naoki,” said Akio.

“Alright, come on in! He just got back.”

Akio wiped his feet on the little welcome mat and was immediately seated at the little booth and had a cup of hot chocolate pressed into his hands.

“Here, sweetie,” said Rhoda, the suction cups on her fingers popping off the ceramic mug as she pulled her hands away. “Drink up, you look like you need it.” She donned her rubber boots and bustled off to the main kitchen in one of the big buildings to start cooking another massive pot of stew.

Naoki opened the door to the bathroom and stepped out. He looked very young, maybe close to eighteen, and his hands were gnarled and knobbly like wood, except the surface stretched and twisted when he moved his hands. One of his eyes was human, the other had a black sclera.

“Hello,” he said shyly. His accent was very thick. “Who are you?”

Akio immediately switched to speaking Japanese. “My name is Akio Sato. You’re Naoki, right?”

Naoki’s eyebrows shot straight up towards his hairline and his face immediately lit up. “You’re Japanese, too?”

“Yeah,” he said. “I moved to America almost a year ago. I just have some questions I want to ask you, is that alright?”

“Yes, of course!” Naoki plopped down, then let out a sigh. “How do you learn English? I heard you talking before, you speak it so well!”

“Ah, I had no friends in high school so all I did was study,” said Akio. “I can point you to some websites, but mostly just listening to people speak English will help.”

“Alright, thank you.”

“So I’m going to ask you about Monsoon Japan,” said Akio. “Is that okay?”

“Yes, I’ve been looking for somebody to say this to!” said Naoki cheerily. “I tried to explain to Yumi, but she doesn’t speak Japanese and I’m still not so good at English so…” He laughed awkwardly.

“Where is it located, first of all?” asked Akio, pulling out his doodle pad to jot down the answers.

“Just outside of Osaka,”said Naoki. “But I think that there are some smaller laboratories in the city itself. I was lucky, the truck I was being transported on broke down, and the three other mutants and I were able to escape. We were found very quickly by some other escaped mutants in the city, a news reporter saw us and it was all over the tabloids.”

“How come it’s just you over here?”

“I wanted to get away from the city,” said Naoki. “Too many bad memories. I wanted to see some of the world, and one of the people in the Osaka resistance said I could come here, so I did.”

“How big is Monsoon Osaka?” asked Akio.

“I’m not sure,” said Naoki. “The building was very large. I only saw it for a few moments as I was driving away in the van. I saw many mutants there, most of them seemed to be like the man with the metal arm out front. Some didn’t act like real people, it was scary.”

Akio took a few notes. “What was it like in there?”

“No humans,” said Naoki. “Everything was done by machines, robots. I only saw humans when they were taking me away and about once a month when an experiment needed to be done that was too delicate for a machine. Everything else was handled by drones or other robots.” He tapped his chin with a forefinger. “We were kept in individual rooms, we were fed twice daily, usually alone. Sometimes… there were terrible, terrible screams when something went… wrong.” He looked away, mouth clamped tight shut.

“We don’t have to talk about that,” said Akio, still jotting things down.

“Do you come from the Monsoon Osaka labs, too?” asked Naoki.

“I honestly don’t know,” said Akio. “I was in foster care as a kid, I have no idea where I came from. I could be from Monsoon Osaka, or I could have been flown over from America or some other country.”

“Wow.” Naoki smiled. “Well, that’s an interesting mystery to solve.”

Akio tapped his pen on the tabletop. “Yeah. It really is.”

“Hey,” said Naoki with a cheeky look. “If you tell me the name of those English learning websites, I’ll give you the names and addresses of some mutants who live in Japan. I think I have the phone number or email address of a few of them, too. You could get in touch, maybe even go see them!”

“It’s a deal,” said Akio with a wide grin. He tore off a page from his notepad and started to scrawl down references.

 

It was dark by the time Akio saw Levitan again. He was towelling his hair off from his shower and was wearing Levitan’s oversized shirt as they came into their little trailer.

“Hey,” said Akio with a smile.

“Hi.” Levitan kicked off their boots and didn’t meet his eyes as they unbuckled their belt to change.

“I was talking to Naoki,” said Akio as he hung the towel up to dry. “Nice guy. Knows a lot about Monsoon Osaka, and he gave the contact info of a few mutants that live there! Cool, huh?”

“Mmhmm,” said Levitan as they kicked off their jeans and left on their boxers. They unbuttoned their shirt.

“I borrowed Ryan’s computer and sent an email to one of them,” said Akio. “Made a new email address, I have no idea if Monsoon is keeping tabs on my old one or not. Christ, there’s gotta be so many ads in my inbox I don’t even wanna think about it. Anyway, I haven’t heard back from them yet, but you’ll know as soon as I do.”

Levitan hummed again as they pulled off their binder. Akio paused to admire their biceps, their sharp clavicle, their muscled abdomen, and their breasts. Their skin was patterned with scars from knives and bullets, a particularly nasty one gashed across their cleavage. Tragically, Levitan pulled on a t-shirt, but lucky for Akio their shape still showed through their shirt. Levitan wasn’t _very_ curvy, but they had a well-defined waist that Akio loved to wrap his arms around.

“Anyway,” said Akio, “I chatted with Yumi and she’s asked me to do as much investigating into Monsoon Osaka as I like. I might even get a chance to go home for a visit!”

Levitan stopped dead in the middle of folding their clothes. “You’re leaving?”

“Well, nothing’s sure _yet,_ ” said Akio, not picking up on the tenseness in Levitan’s shoulders and voice. “But it would be nice to stop by Kyoto before heading to Osaka. Say hi to some friends, visit a temple and pray for a little much-needed luck, maybe.”

Levitan pivoted to look at him. Their expression was pensive.

“You’d come with me, right?” asked Akio eagerly. He took their hands and looked up at them. “It would be fun!”

Levitan pulled their hands away.

Akio’s eyes went wide. He dropped his hands. “Lev, what’s wrong?”

Levitan rubbed their eyes. “Akio, I don’t think I can do that.”

“Why not?” he asked, his voice feeling very small.

“Well… _I_ just got home,” they said, gesturing outside. “I can’t just _leave._ People need me, here.”

“I need you, too,” he said softly.

“I didn’t say you didn’t,” said Levitan. “Mostly… I’m thinkin’ of Ryan, and the resistance. I have a lot to offer around here, I won’t be any good to anybody if I’m galavanting off in some foreign country, will I?”

“Lev, we wouldn’t be _galavanting,_ we’d be doing good work,” said Akio.

“I’ve already missed a _third_ of my son’s life,” said Levitan emphatically. “I don’t wanna miss any more. I didn’t get to see him go from a chubby-cheeked lil’ kid to being a fifteen-year-old. I-I don’t wanna miss any more than I possibly have to.”

Akio gave them a soft look. “Of course not, Lev, we don’t have to go for-”

“And Austin is my _home,_ ” they said tiredly. “I love it here. I love the quality of the air, the good people, and the good food. I _just_ got home, I don’t wanna leave so quick.”

“I’m not saying we have to go _now,_ just-”

“Fuck, Akio,” said Levitan, and Akio got the impression they weren’t listening anymore. “I don’t _own_ you, if you wanna go back home you can.”

Akio’s breath caught in his chest. “W-what?”

“You can go to Kyoto and Osaka if you want,” said Levitan. “I won’t stop you.”

“I don’t wanna just _go_ I wanna go with _you,_ ” said Akio. “I don’t want to _just_ find out more about Monsoon Osaka, I want to find out where I come from. Don’t you want to come with me?”

“I ain’t ‘bout to drop everything for _that_ , Akio,” said Levitan. “I got my own shit to deal with, here. That ain’t as important, right now.”

His heart sank further. “I’m not important?”

“Don’t twist my words, I didn’t say that,” snapped Levitan.

“We’re a team, aren’t we?” asked Akio, his tone growing more urgent. “Aren’t we supposed to stick together?”

“I’ve helped your dumb ass a million times, Akio,” said Levitan. “I saved you from being mushed into paste in Monsoon, remember?”

“Lev, of course I remember, I just-”

“Ain’t that _enough_ for you?” asked Levitan. They sounded frustrated. “Akio, just have my back this _once_ okay?”

“I said we don’t have to go _now!_ ” said Akio loudly. “It can be in a month, a year, or five! It doesn’t matter! It was just an _idea,_ okay? It’s one that I plan to follow through on, because it’s _important_ to me!”

“Then you can go without me!” said Levitan. “I don’t care! Go next week, you’re your own man!”

“But-”

“Akio, _I’m not going to Japan!_ Okay?” They turned away from him. “Just drop it, we’re done talkin’ ‘bout this.”

Akio gently touched Levitan on the shoulder. “Lev, just-”

Levitan’s fingers quickly closed over his wrist and yanked his hand away from them. They held his hand in a vice-like grip and glared down at him with a cold look in their eyes that made his stomach twist in an oh-so-familiar way. He tried to pull away, but their hand held tight onto his wrist.

“I said _drop it,_ ” they snarled.

Akio whimpered. He felt the tears in his eyes. “L-Lev, you’re hurting me.”

Something sparked in Levitan’s eyes, like they just realized what they were doing, and they quickly dropped his wrist. “Fuck. I-I’m sorry.”

Akio looked down at his wrist. There was a hand-shaped bruise marked on his skin. He felt a little bit sick as he realized that he’d seen that exact shape on his arm, before.

Levitan dimmed the lights aside from the lamp by the bed. They didn’t look at him as they climbed under the covers.

“Lev, I’m sorry,” said Akio quietly. He crawled under the covers after them and turned out the last light.

“I’m sorry, too,” they mumbled. “I shouldn’t’ve yelled or grabbed you. That was bad.”

“I’m sorry I pushed it.”

“No, don’t be sorry. You didn’t do nothin’ wrong.” Levitan rolled over. “Can I… hold you?”

“Yeah,” he said. He wasn’t sure if he really wanted them to.

Levitan put one large arm around his torso and pulled him in close, resting their forehead on the back of his neck. They let out a breath.

Akio’s skin crawled. He knew that Levitan wasn’t in the mood to talk, but they had to talk about a lot more stuff if they wanted things to be okay between them. He reassured himself with the thought that they _would_ talk about it, when they weren’t so tired and upset.

He laced his fingers with Levitan’s as they began to fall asleep. It took him a little bit longer to drift off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "In my family, we don't say I love you, we say I like you a whole lot" -- a family friend who is very funny
> 
> SUGAR DADDY JAMES FOR LIFE (I regret nothing)


	13. Not Okay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levitan and Akio have an argument. The others intervene.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: abuse, blood, violence.

Akio woke up to an empty bed, with Levitan nowhere in sight. He hastily got dressed, the anxiety building in his chest with every passing minute, and went to go look for Levitan.

He felt worried and nervous. Most mornings, Levitan was there when he woke up, or was at least nearby having coffee. He hadn’t woken up alone since they’d rescued him from Monsoon. Something was _definitely_ off, and they _needed_ to talk about what happened between them last night.

Levitan wasn’t in the mess hall, or out by the shooting range, or sitting out in the sunshine in front of their trailer. He asked around, and nobody had seen them all day. He found himself by the barn, looking around. He could hear the telltale sounds of wood being split with an axe.

“Mornin’, Akio!” Ryan walked up to him with a spring in his step, Dana following along behind at a slower pace. He held a net in his hand. “Whatcha doin’?”

“Looking for Levitan,” said Akio. “What’s with the net?”

“Trying to catch Mikey,” said Ryan cheerily.

“... Mikey?”

“The duck,” said Dana dryly. “I’m here to watch him fail and laugh when he does.”

“I thought you were here to cheer me on and maybe give me a kiss when I succeed!” said Ryan with a cheeky grin.

Dana playfully swatted his shoulder. “Anyway, if you’re looking for Levitan, I saw them with an axe earlier.”

“Which means dismembering a corpse or chopping wood,” said Ryan. He pointed with a thumb towards the area behind the barn, where the sound of wood being split was coming from. “That might be them. See you!”

Akio watched as the two of them raced into the barn, then he walked around to the back of the building. The sound of the axe thudding grew louder as he walked closer. He rounded the corner and saw Levitan in a tank top and dirty blue jeans, an axe in their hand. With one powerful swing, they knocked a block of wood clean in half.

“Good morning,” he said, loudly enough that he couldn't be ignored.

“Hey.” Levitan didn't look at him. They steadied the piece of wood on the block, readied their axe, and chopped it. The axe got stuck on a knot in the wood, and it took them another blow to get through it.

“How did you sleep?” asked Akio. He didn't want to beat around the bush, but he had to test the waters first. Levitan didn't appear to be in the best mood.

He received a grunt in lieu of a proper reply.

“I didn't see you this morning. Is everything alright?”

“Mm.” They chopped another piece of wood in half like it was nothing.

This was getting nowhere, fast. Levitan wasn't listening and Akio was fighting _very_ hard not to be distracted by their biceps. He decided to cut to the chase.

“Look,” he said, walking a few steps closer. “I promise that I'm not mad about last night.”

Levitan finally looked at him, leaning an elbow on their axe. Their face  was expressionless, aside from the tense muscle in their jaw. They still didn't say a word.

Akio took another small step closer. “I just wanna talk about it, okay?”

“Talk about what?” they asked. They stacked up the split wood.

“Really?” he asked. He couldn't help feeling irritated. “Are you _really_ playing dumb with me?”

“About what?” Levitan picked up the wood pieces and carried them over to the shed.

“Lev, don't be like this,” said Akio. “I want to talk to you about it because it's important to me. What happened between us last night wasn't okay, and I don't want that for the two of us.”

Levitan dumped the chopped wood onto the pile and came back with a large block under their arm. “Akio, it's better if we just forget about it.”

“ _Seriously?_ ” he asked incredulously. “No, Lev, I _can't_ forget about it! You grabbed me! It _hurt!_ Th-this isn't something we can just shuffle to the side and ignore!”

“Why not?” Levitan chopped the block in half, then set up one of the halves to be chopped again.

“Because…”

Because he'd had to deal with this before. He didn't want it to happen again.

He knew better, now. He didn't want to have this with Levitan. He didn’t want to be afraid of them, he wanted to love them with all of his heart and have something good, sweet and special with them. He knew that they couldn’t have that if things were unhealthy between them. He wanted something better for the both of them.

It scared him that Levitan didn’t seem to have the same priority.

“Akio, I gotta lot of other shit to deal with right now, can we talk later?”

“No, Lev.” He fought to keep the tremor out of his voice. “I wanna talk about it _now_.”

“Why does it gotta be _now?_ ”

“If not _now_ then _when?_ ” he demanded. “This is something that has to be fixed, Levitan. I don’t want you to treat me that way. You’re a good person, I know that you know better.”

“I ain’t a good person, Akio,” said Levitan. “I already fuckin’ _told_ you this, and you still wanted to be with me anyway. If anything, that makes _you_ the dumbass.”

That felt like a slap in the face. It took him a moment to form the words, “Are you _blaming_ me for this?”

“I dunno!” they said, throwing their hands up. “I don’t fuckin’ know, Akio.”

“You’re saying that by _choosing to be with you,_ I brought this on myself,” said Akio. Levitan opened their mouth to protest, but Akio quickly cut them off with, “Don’t _bullshit_ me, that’s _exactly_ what you meant!”

Levitan leaned the axe against the chopping block. Their hands were trembling. Akio could see that they were mad.

“Levitan, I care about you a lot,” said Akio loudly. “We can do better. Don’t play dumb with me, you’re smarter than that. If you’d just take your head outta your ass for a minute and have some _goddamn_ humility, you’d be able to see that, too!”

He hated how the angry glare that Levitan shot him made his throat tighten and his stomach turn.

Akio took a deep breath and clenched his fists. This wasn't going to be easy.

 

“I've _almost_ got him!”

“Ryan, give it up.” Dana sat on a barrel in the barn, filing her claws while she watched Ryan chase the duck in circles. “You’ve been outwitted by a waterfowl, there’s no two ways about it.”

“Just wait! I’ll catch him, I swear I will!” Ryan lunged for Mikey, who quickly flapped away while quacking irritably. “ _Fuck!_ ” Ryan’s foot slipped on the loose straw on the floor and he fell, landing flat on his stomach.

Dana couldn’t help laughing as he groaned, having knocked the wind out of himself. To add to his indignity, the duck ran right past him, but not before hopping onto his head and jumping to the side.

“ _Come on, don't be like that!_ ”

The voice came from outside. Dana stood from the barrel. She couldn’t tell who it was, but she could hear the anger in their tone. “Did you hear that?”

“Hear what?” Ryan sat up, rubbing his chest. “ _Oof._ Ow, that hurt.”

“I’m gonna go check it out.” She walked towards the barn entrance, straw shuffling under her shoes. The voice had quieted down, but he could still hear the frustrated murmurs of two people arguing.

“Cool, go on ahead, I’ll catch up.” Ryan got back to his feet. “I almost got ‘im cornered, I know it!”

Dana giggled as she slipped between the doors. She walked around to the other side of the barn, and she could hear fighting growing louder as she approached the people talking.

She kneeled on the dry, pokey grass that stung the soft palms of her hands when she touched it, and she peeked around the corner, careful to remain just out of sight.

Levitan was standing facing Akio, their hands on their hips, wearing the most menacing expression they could muster. Akio looked timid, and was doing his best to meet Levitan’s intense gaze.

Dana had seen them argue before, but not like this. She couldn’t figure it out, but something felt very, very wrong.

“Listen, Lev,” said Akio, his voice strained as he forced himself to speak in a level tone. “We can’t just shove this under the rug, we gotta talk it through so we can move forward.”

“What’s the point in dwellin’?” asked Levitan in a challenging tone. “It happened, it won’t happen again.”

“You can't _promise_ that,” said Akio imploringly. “I’ve had people say “ _it won’t happen again_ ” to me before, but I’ll tell you it _never_ pans out unless we talk about it and try to fix it together. Lev, please, I don’t want to live like this.”

“For _fuck’s sake,_ don’t tell me how you wanna live!” Levitan’s fists were clenched, their arms held rigid down at their sides. Dana saw Akio take a tiny step back. “Why are you all _surprised_ that I’m like this? I always _tell_ y’all that I'm a piece of shit, but when I haul off and actually _do_ somethin’ you act all _surprised!_ ”

Akio had a slight tremble in his voice when he said, “Levitan, you’re _not_ a piece of shit, but at least you admit that what you did was shitty!”

Dana was starting to put together a picture here that she _really_ didn’t like. Part of her wanted to leave so she wouldn’t have to watch this, part of her wanted to intervene, and part of her wanted to get Ryan so he could see this, too.

The decision was made for her. Dana turned her head when she heard footsteps on the dry grass.

“Hey,” whispered Ryan as he kneeled next to her. “I heard Lev yelling. What’s goin’ on?”

“I… I’m not exactly sure, but I _really_ don’t like it,” she said. She sat on the grass, peering around the edge of the barn, while Ryan stood and leaned over her, his hands on her shoulders for balance.

“Lev, look,” said Akio. “I just wanna know why you refuse to talk about this.”

“What is there _to_ talk about?” they asked sharply. “I did something wrong, I said sorry, case closed.”

“It’s not _closed_ ,” said Akio tersely. “I don’t want our fights to end like that.”

Levitan didn’t say anything. They folded their arms tightly.

“You _grabbed_ me, Levitan. It _hurt,_ and it sure as _fuck_ felt abusive.”

Dana’s heart skipped a beat. Holy _shit._ That was _fucked up._ She felt Ryan’s fingers digging into her shoulder.

“What the fuck?” mumbled Ryan, his voice barely audible above the sound of Levitan and Akio arguing.

Dana couldn’t answer him, but she could feel the anger on behalf of Akio and anger at Levitan rising in her chest.

“Are you accusing me of being abusive?” asked Levitan, taking a step forward. “Cause if that’s what you want, I can _fuckin’_ live up to that!”

Dana’s claws were digging into the side of the barn. She felt sick to her stomach. She could hear Ryan breathing heavily above her.

“I said that I _don’t_ want that!” he cried, taking a step back. “Levitan, I want us to have a happy and healthy relationship, don’t you want that, too?”

“I _can’t_ have that!” they snapped. They took another step forward. Their hands were clenched into fists at their sides. “Everything in my life is fucked up in one way or another! Why the _fuck_ would this be any different?”

“We can _make_ it different, Lev,” said Akio weakly as he took another step backwards. “We can have something good. It won’t be easy, we’d have to work for it, but we can do it. I know we can.”

Levitan set their jaw and took a deep breath. “Akio, I’m no good at this _emotional_ shit, you know that. Can’t you just let this go?”

“No! I can’t, Levitan! You _grabbed me!_ That’s not okay! We’re adults, and we’re dating, we can’t treat each other like this.” He took a shaking breath. “Why are you so intent on wanting to _hurt_ me?”

“Akio, don’t be fuckin’ stupid,” growled Levitan. “I don’t wanna _hurt_ you!”

“Then why do you keep making excuses?” he asked. His voice sounded choked. “You said sorry _once,_ that’s it! Th-that’s not good enough!”

“Why do _you_ keep tryin’ to change what I am?” asked Levitan. They were advancing on him again, and Akio was backing up to keep the distance between them. “I’m a _monster!_ Did it not _fuckin’_ occur to you that bein’ with me ain’t gonna be all sugar plums and fairytales?”

“Levitan, stop this!” he said hysterically, growing more panicked as they stepped closer. “I _know_ you can do better than this, I know we both can! Don’t we deserve it?”

“I know that _I_ sure as _fuck_ don’t!” they snapped. “You can smack me back, I don’t give a shit!”

“I don’t _want to_ hit you!” he protested. “Levitan, I want things to be good between us. Why are you _deliberately_ sabotaging us?”

“ _This is what I’m like!_ ” they roared.

Akio stumbled backwards. His shoulders hit the barn, and he realized that he was trapped. His breath was coming too fast, he was sure that he was crying, now. “Levitan, please-”

“This is what I’m like,” they growled. “When you signed up to be with me, you signed up to be with _all_ of me.”

They slammed their hand against the side of the barn, a few inches from his left ear. He flinched away. He forced himself to look up at Levitan.

They looked _furious._ He didn’t know what he did to make them so angry, but _fuck_ it must have been _something._

Part of what Levitan was saying made sense to him, even though he really knew better. A small part of him agreed that yes, if he wanted to love Levitan, he had to love _all_ of them, but his higher brain knew that wasn’t right. He knew that being yelled at like this wasn’t okay, but he also knew that he was still going to crawl into bed next to Levitan tonight, even if they didn’t apologize for how they were acting.

Dana and Ryan watched in silent horror at this exchange. Ryan had a death grip on Dana’s shoulder, and even though it hurt she hardly noticed or cared. What they were watching _wasn’t_ okay, not in any way, shape, or form.

They had to do something, didn’t they?

Akio closed his eyes and said quietly, “I… I thought you were different, Levitan.”

“Different?” they said in that demanding tone that made him flinch.

“Yeah. I thought you were different. I thought that I was safe with you.” He sighed and wrapped his arms around himself. “I guess I was wrong.”

When he finally looked up at Levitan, he saw the first flicker of remorse in their grey eyes. Their hand slipped from the barn to their side, and they took a step back.

Akio waited patiently for them to say something. He waited for them to apologize, or even make some excuse, but he _desperately_ wanted them to change their mind and agree with him, so they could talk it through like adults.

“Yeah,” said Levitan at last. They kicked their boot in the dirt. “That was pretty stupid of you.”

Akio couldn’t believe his ears at first. His heart fucking broke in half when they said those words. “W-what?”

“You heard.” They didn’t look at him. They looked at the ground.

Akio sobbed. He put his face in his hands and sobbed into his palms. He could hardly believe what had just happened. On the other hand, a tiny part of him knew that this was bound to happen, and it had just been a matter of time.

His head jerked up when he heard fast footsteps approaching the two of them. Dana and Ryan stood before him and Levitan. Dana looked _furious._ Ryan looked upset.

Levitan’s eyes went wide when they saw the two of them. “Oh… fuck. Fuckin’ hell, how long were you two there?”

“Long enough!” shouted Dana. “ _How could you?_ ”

“Lev, th-that’s really fucked up!” said Ryan, his voice cracking horribly. “Why did you do that? What’s _wrong_ with you?”

“You fuckin’ _know_ what’s wrong with me,” said Levitan. “This has nothin’ to do with you kids, beat it.”

“ _Fuck you!_ ” yelled Dana, and Levitan visibly tense with anger at that. “How _dare_ you treat Akio that way? What the _fuck_ makes you think it’s okay to do that?”

“All he wanted was to talk it out with you, but you weren’t even listening!” said Ryan incredulously. “I’m just… w-what the hell?”

“I said _beat it,_ you two!” snapped Levitan, pointing with emphasis towards the barn. “ _Go away._ ”

“No! We won’t!” said Dana. “Not until you understand that what you did was _shitty,_ what you said was _mean,_ and you say sorry to Akio!”

“Kids, just leave it,” said Akio quietly. “It’s fine, we were just having an argument.”

“Levitan was _bullying_ you!” said Dana, pointing an accusing finger at Levitan.

Levitan didn’t bother to deny the accusation, but Akio said lamely, “It was just a misunderstanding.”

“No, I think we understand perfectly,” said Dana, her voice shaking with anger. “I-I don’t know what fucking _universe_ you’re living in that makes fighting like that okay, but… it’s _not okay!_ ”

Levitan’s fists were still clenched, and they radiated anger from every pore. Akio took a small step back from them, and Ryan put a hand on Dana’s arm.

“I _said_ this doesn’t _concern_ you,” said Levitan, their voice dark and dangerous.

“I think it does!” said Dana loudly. “It matters to me that you’re treating Akio like garbage! You were calling him names! You _threatened_ him! You made him cry!”

Akio hastily wiped his cheeks. “Jeez, don’t put too fine a point on it.”

“Sometimes adults argue,” Levitan said.

“Not like that!” Dana took a step forward. Ryan’s hand was clenched on her upper arm. “I’m telling you right here and now that you were acting like an _asshole,_ and before the day is done I’m gonna tell the others how you were acting so they know just what a _piece of shit you can be!_ ”

Ryan looked back and forth between Dana and Levitan, utterly conflicted. He still held onto Dana’s arm.

Levitan shot him a glare. “What’s with the look, son? You agree with her?”

“Well, duh, Lev,” said Ryan. “W-what you did was fucked up. You know better than this… don’t you?”

Levitan looked away from him without answering.

Ryan clenched his other fist. The confusion and hurt promptly vanished and was replaced with anger that rivaled Dana’s. He desperately wanted to punch Levitan in the fucking face and see how _they_ liked it. He wanted to hit and kick and scream until he was spent, until they finally fucking listened to him.

Then he realized that he may have just inherited their hot temper.

That scared him.

Dana took another step towards Levitan. “Levitan, if a couple of teenagers can look you in the eye and say that what you’re doing is fucked up and have an entire team to back them up, maybe you should fucking reevaluate your life.”

Levitan’s jaw was clenched. They looked absolutely furious, and Ryan got a very strong signal that the two of them should back off.

Dana didn’t back off. She looked _goddamn scary_ with her sharp teeth when she yelled, “ _Fuck you for thinking you can get away with this shit!_ ”

Dana was close enough for Levitan to reach. They started to reach a hand for her.

Dana was furious. She reacted on instinct. Her hand slashed up, and she slapped Levitan.

“Whoa!” Ryan pulled her back immediately.

Akio’s hands shot to his mouth. “Lev, are you-”

Levitan’s hand was on their cheek. When they lowered their hand, it was covered in blood and they had four gashes across their face in a neat row from Dana’s claws.

Their eyes were wild. Their hands were clenched into fists, and they suddenly looked torn between being terrified out of their mind and angry as all hell.

Ryan recognized that look. It was the look they had right before they proceeded to slaughter thirty Monsoon soldiers with their bare hands.

Levitan began to stalk towards Dana, their teeth bared in a snarl, their eyes unseeing. Ryan knew that he believed they were back in a fight, that Dana was a threat, and that they had to kill the person who hurt them. Ryan could take it if he had to, so could Akio if it came down to it, but Dana could die. He couldn’t let that happen.

“Lev, no!” cried Ryan, pushing Dana behind him. There was less of a chance of Levitan attacking them, and he could heal from their blows.

“Levitan, stop!” Akio grabbed their arm.

Levitan swatted him off and sent him down into the dirt. They grabbed Ryan by the front of his shirt and tossed him aside like he weighed nothing.

Ryan hit the ground hard. He saw Levitan backing Dana up against the side of the barn, Dana looked terrified out of her mind, her eyes wide with fear.

“Levitan, don’t!” Akio shouted, clamouring to his feet. “That’s _Dana!_ ”

“Lev, please, no!” Dana shouted. Levitan grabbed her wrist and began to crush it in their hand.

At the sound of Dana’s scream, Ryan flew into full panic mode. He didn’t think. He grabbed a chunk of firewood, reared up, and cracked Levitan across the back of the head with it.

The wood came away bloody. Their knees buckled, and they slowly toppled to the ground.

“ _Lev!_ ” Akio dropped to his knees by their side and turned them over onto their back with some effort. Their eyes were closed, but they were still breathing. “They’re unconscious.”

“Dana, are you okay?” asked Ryan urgently, tossing the wood chunk aside.

“I-I’m fine,” said Dana, cradling her arm to her chest.

“Is your wrist okay?” asked Ryan.

“Just bruised.” She flexed her fingers. “Thank you. W-what happened to Levitan?”

“They thought you were a threat,” said Ryan. “Like… a Monsoon agent or something. I don’t know. But they got scared.”

Akio had pulled Levitan’s head to rest in his lap. He stroked his hand over their forehead, tracing the four cuts across their cheekbone with his fingers.

“Dana, you go tell James,” said Ryan. “He’s known Levitan for the longest, maybe he can smarten them the fuck up.”

“Yeah, sure,” she said. She held her arm to her chest as she jogged off towards the mess hall.

Ryan plopped down on the dirt next to Akio. “So, man. What’s the deal?”

“Nothing.” Akio didn’t look at him. “We were arguing.”

“About what?” he pressed.

“... It’s not really any of your business,” said Akio.

“I’m _making_ it my business,” said Ryan. “Listen, man, Lev may be my parent but I care about _you_ a whole lot too. The way they were yelling at you was fucked up, and I don’t want ‘em to be like that.”

“Ryan, listen, it’s not your place to keep Lev in check,” said Akio. He rubbed his thumb across Levitan’s cheek as the cuts slowly began to heal. “You’re their son, you should be on their side and not mine.”

“I’m on the side of what’s right,” said Ryan. “Levitan is wrong.”

Akio made a bit of a face. “Don’t worry about me. We’re working through it.”

“Doesn’t sound like Lev is workin’ very hard.”

Akio didn’t look at him. “We’ll figure it out. I can take what they dish out. I’m used to it.”

That damn near made Ryan have a heart attack. “Wait, you’re _used to it?_ How fuckin’ long has Lev been treating you like this?”

“Th-this was the first time, I swear!” Akio protested. “It really was. We were just arguing last night, and it carried over to this morning. I promise, this is the first time with them.”

“With _them?_ ”

Akio cringed. “Well, uh. Let’s keep personal stuff personal, yeah?”

Ryan felt sick to his stomach. “Who _else_ has done this to you.”

Akio fidgeted and didn’t answer right away. He played with Levitan’s blonde hair.

“ _Well?_ ” demanded Ryan.

“A few people,” he said. “It was a long time ago.”

Ryan wasn’t about to press for more, but he definitely knew whose side he was on, now. He wondered whether Levitan had known this about Akio, and whether that would have changed anything if they had.

He turned his head when he heard pounding footsteps. James and Dana pelted up, feet skidding in the dirt.

“Dana gave me the short story about what happened,” said James breathlessly. He coughed, and leaned over and put his hands on his knees. “Fucking Christ, my knees hurt.”

“Take it easy,” said Dana, putting a hand on his shoulder.

“No, I _fucking_ won’t!” James stood straight, popped his back with a groan, and let out a long breath. He pointed down at Levitan’s unconscious form. “Who did _that?_ ”

Ryan raised a tentative hand. “It was me.”

James hissed through his teeth. “They are _not_ gonna be happy when they come to.” He pointed to Akio. “You might not want to be near them when they wake up. If they’re still in that bad headspace, they might lash out.”

Akio gripped Levitan’s shoulder. “It’s fine. I’ll bounce back.”

James shook his head. He put a hand over his face, the eyes visible behind the popped collar of his shirt staring down at Akio.

“Tell me _exactly_ what happened,” said James. He kneeled on the ground next to Akio. “I need you to tell me when this started, and what exactly they did.”

Akio swallowed hard. “W-why?”

“So I can _help,_ dammit!” said James, and he quickly lowered his voice when he saw Akio jump. “Sorry. I know you’re on edge.” He coughed. “Levitan has a temper. They are a good person, but sometimes they get selfish and lose themself. We’re gonna have to straight talk them and smarten them up. They do know better, and they can get their act together. I’m sorry you had to put up with what they did. If you would _tell_ me what happened, that would make things easier.”

Akio took a breath. “Okay. We just had a fight last night. I was bringing up some ideas they didn’t like, and I kinda kept pushing it until-”

“Don’t blame yourself,” said James. “It gets really easy, but anybody with a brain knows who’s in the wrong, here.”

“Alright,” said Akio. “Well, uh, we argued. They grabbed me. _Hard._ It hurt really bad. This morning, it took me awhile to find them, and when I did we started arguing again, and I kept saying we had to try and fix it but they weren’t listening to me.”

James nodded. “Okay. We can make them listen.”

Levitan groaned. They raised a hand to their face and sat up. “What… what happened?”

“You were acting crazy,” said Ryan. “I hit you on the head.”

Levitan lowered their hand. “Right. Shit. I’m sorry, Dana. That was bad of me.”

“No _shit!_ ” snapped James before they could say anything. “The _fuck_ were you thinking, acting out like that? Are you _six?_ ”

Levitan tried to stand. “James? When did you-”

Without warning, James’s fist lashed out and caught Levitan across the jaw. Levitan toppled back into the dirt, right on their ass. Akio quickly scrambled out of the way.

Levitan’s jaw was dislocated. With a groan, they snapped it back in place, then looked up at James. “What the fuck?”

“Don’t give me those eyes,” snapped James. “You _know_ what you fuckin’ did.”

“I think you kinda got me beat in the eyes department, James,” said Levitan slightly woozily. “You got like twenty or somethin’.”

“Don’t try and act cute or funny,” said James. He crossed his arms and stood properly. “Akio told me what happened, and Dana had something to add, too.”

“Sorry for hitting you,” said Dana hastily. “I got mad.”

“It’s fine,” said Levitan, waving her off. “God knows I can relate to _that_.”

“Are you okay?” asked Akio tentatively.

Levitan stopped. They turned and looked at him properly. “Kinda. You?”

“Kinda.” Akio played with his fingers. “I mean. We need to talk… about… a lotta stuff.”

Levitan didn’t look like they really wanted to do that. They flicked a pebble away in the dirt. “... I guess.”

“Don’t _guess,_ ” said James. “Fucking apologize. Right now. I want you to mean it, then I want you to make him an apology card and do an “I’m very sorry” dance. I’m not letting you get away with this shit, Levitan. You know better.”

“Yeah. You’re right.” Levitan pinched the bridge of their nose. “Fuck. Fuckin’ hell. This is so fucking typical of me, ain’t it?”

“Don’t start with that,” said James warningly. “Save the self-pity. Grow the fuck up.”

Levitan sighed. “Ryan, Dana, I’m sorry I shouted at y’all. That wasn’t right of me.”

Dana nodded but didn’t say a word. Ryan made a slight shrug.

Levitan didn’t expect more from them, and they didn’t want it either. They didn’t deserve to be forgiven. They turned to Akio. “Darlin’, I’m real sorry. I know words ain’t gonna fix all the hurt I just caused you.”

“It’s okay,” he said automatically.

“No, it’s really not,” interjected James. “Make them work for your forgiveness.”

“Jeez, harsh much?” asked Levitan.

“You’re walking on thin ice,” said James, pointing a vicious finger at them. “ _Watch it._ ”

“I know, I know, I’m sorry,” said Levitan. “I guess gettin’ knocked ‘round a bit set my head straight.”

“Or maybe being shown that you can’t act like a shithead and get away with it did?” suggested Dana.

“Maybe.”

Ryan’s fists were clenched. He stood and glared down at Levitan, who was still sitting in the dirt.

“I can’t believe you did those things,” said Ryan. His voice was shaking with anger. “I can’t fuckin’ believe you.”

“Ryan-” started Dana.

Ryan bolted. His sneakers kicked up dirt behind him. He quickly disappeared into the forest. Dana was on her feet after him, and glanced back over her shoulder at the three of them before disappearing into the bushes.

“Shit,” said Levitan. They put their head in their hands. “All I do is fuck up.”

“Well, lucky for you, you can fix things this time,” said James. “If you’re willing to, anyways.”

“What are you, my dad?” asked Levitan sharply.

“No, I just think you can do better,” said James. “Fuck, I sure _hope_ we’re not related.”

“Yeah, ew. That would make a whole lotta stuff real weird.” Levitan gave a nervous laugh as they got back to their feet. They offered a hand to Akio.

Akio took it reluctantly, and let Levitan pull him to his feet. Their hand was gentle with his, and when he was standing again, they held both of his hands in theirs.

“Akio,” they said. “I’m real sorry. I can’t believe it took gettin’ whacked on the head with a chunk o’ wood to get me to say that. I don’t deserve you, and you don’t deserve me an’ all my troubles.”

“Levitan, we can work through this,” he said. “I know we can. We’re both smart people who care about each other a whole lot.”

“Yeah, we are,” they said.

James put his hands on his hips. “Nice to see you acting like a grown-up, Levitan. Maybe you can sit at the big kid’s table tonight.”

“Ha-fucking-ha.” Levitan’s voice had no malice. Instead, they sounded _exhausted._

“Do you still need me to babysit you, or can you guys figure stuff out from here?”

“We’re fine,” said Levitan.

“I wanna hear it from him,” said James, pointing to Akio.

“I think we’re okay,” said Akio quietly. “We’re gonna sit and talk for a bit.”

“Okay,” said James. All of his eyes were trained on Levitan. “I’m fucking watching you, Levitan. If you even _think_ about hitting him, I’m gonna gut you.”

“Yeah, fuck you too,” said Levitan half-heartedly. They leaned against the barn and slid down until they were sitting in the grass. Akio sat next to them so their legs were touching.

James backed away, eyes still trained on Levitan. “I’m still gonna yell at you, later. I have more anger where that came from.”

“Yeah, sure, whatever.” Levitan sounded defeated.

James held up his middle finger as he walked away and disappeared behind the barn.

Levitan let out a long breath. “You’re gonna have to lead this conversation. Feelin’s and I don’t normally go all that well together. I ain’t all that good at talkin’ ‘bout this sorta thing.”

“Can I give you my honest opinion?” asked Akio, not sure whether Levitan would react well to his candid thoughts.

“Yeah, alright.”

“I think you get violent when you get mad,” said Akio quietly, “or scared, or frustrated. Like, yesterday you punched the barn when you were upset about Monsoon.”

“Yeah. You’re right.”

“I, um,” said Akio. “Can I tell you something?”

“Yeah.”

“I told you I was in foster care, right?”

“Right,” said Levitan. Their voice was soft, and they were mumbling slightly.

Akio let out a long sigh. “Well, not all of the homes I ended up in were good to me. A few of the people I stayed with were abusive. I got hit and yelled at and shoved around.” He picked at the grass next to him on the ground. “Worst thing that happened to me is that I acted out once and I was locked in the closet for a day. The thing is, because my bruises always miraculously disappeared, the social worker always thought I was lying.”

“Holy shit,” said Levitan quietly. A whole lot of things began to make sense. Guilt gnawed in their chest, and they began to feel even _worse_. They didn’t think it was possible.

“Yeah.” He pulled his knees to his chest. “I had an ex who’d hit me, too. I dunno why I let it happen. I guess I just didn’t think I deserved better. I know that I do, but…” He rested his chin on his knees. “I barely have the balls to stand up to you.”

Levitan’s hand tentatively rested on his shoulder. “Baby, I’m real sorry. I’ve, uh, had to put up with some o’ that shit, too.” They sighed and hung their head. They looked so ashamed of themself. “I do know better, but I just… lose control.”

“Well, that’s gonna stop,” said Akio, straightening his legs and his back. “Here and now. It’s dangerous for everybody if you can’t control yourself, Lev. You’re an adult, you need to get your shit together.”

Levitan had a look in their eyes that was almost like fear. “I-I don’t know if I can do it,” they said. “I-I’ve been like th-this for so long, darlin’. God only knows that I’ve been made into a monster, and all monsters can do is destroy everythin’ around them.”

Akio hated to say this, but it had to be said. “I don’t want to be in an abusive relationship, Levitan. I don’t think you’re abusive, I think that you’re a genuinely good person who messes up sometimes, but if you can’t shake this then… we’re gonna have to break up.” He swallowed hard. “It’s a dealbreaker for me. Okay?”

Levitan’s lips were tight. They nodded once. “I get it. I understand.”

“Alright. Good.” Akio leaned his head against their shoulder. “This is gonna take awhile.”

“Yeah, it is.”

The guilt was overwhelming them. A tiny part of them wanted to break it off right now and save Akio a whole lotta trouble, but the rest of them wasn’t about to let one of the best things that had happened to them in their stupid, miserable life slip away through their fingers. They wanted to fix this. They weren’t sure if they could.

“We can figure this out together, right?” said Akio. “I know we can do it.”

“Yeah.” Levitan wasn’t sure. They didn’t have much faith in themself. It was hard for them to change, and their temper had always been a part of them that was constant. They weren’t sure whether they would be able to change.

They hadn’t ever had a relationship end on _good_ terms before, but… Akio was immortal, like them. They could be together for a long, long, _long_ time. Y’know, if they didn’t fuck things up like usual.

“Are you okay?” asked Akio.

“Yeah. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. I’m sorry, too.” He leaned up and pressed a kiss to their cheek.

Levitan chuckled and pressed another one to the corner of his mouth. Akio giggled, his arm locked around theirs.

Well, Levitan had walked through bullets and broken into Monsoon for this man. Working on their anger issues would be a piece of cake in comparison. Besides, they could do with a little self-growth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SCHOOL TOMORROW WOOHOO


	14. Pity-Party and Spit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levitan is at a low point. Things aren't going great.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings: blood, self harm

Dana tripped over a tree root, stumbled, and kept running. Ryan was faster than her, he sprang through the bushes like a gazelle, but lucky for her he was noisy so it was easy to follow him along the trail. Branches snapped and popped under his feet, and she could hear muted swearing.

Suddenly, Dana couldn’t hear him anymore. She jogged ahead for a few more paces, her hand over the stitch in her side, and she looked around for Ryan.

She was standing at the base of a very large oak tree. Ryan was nowhere to be seen.

“Shit.” She leaned against the tree, exhausted. She didn’t like running, particularly in ballet flats. She knew her feet were gonna be sore, later. She squinted into the bushes, trying to find a sign of her friend.

Anger still lingered in her chest over the fight with Levitan. It was a fight to keep her hands steady and her breathing even.

A few twigs fell on her head and she heard some sniffling from up above her. She looked up.

Ryan sat on a branch, his back leaning against the tree. He was rather high up, and there weren’t that many branches to climb with, so she couldn’t help feeling a little bit impressed with how quickly he’d gotten up there.

“Hey,” she said, lowering her voice to be soothing even though underneath she was still upset. “Are you okay?”

“No,” he said thickly. “Goddammit, I can’t fuckin’  _ believe  _ Levitan, sometimes!” He growled and punched the branch he was sitting on. The leaves on the branch rustled, and a few floated down towards the forest floor.

Dana looked away as he punched the branch again and again, making the tree shake as he did so. It was probably healthy that he was working his anger out on a tree rather than keeping it all bottled up. She wasn’t about to interfere with his coping method, not until she could think of a better one.

Ryan whimpered. “Ow.”

Dana looked up and cringed. 

His hand was bloody. He looked at it in disgust.

“Fuckin’ hell,” he muttered. “I’m just like ‘em.”

“What?” she asked.

“I’m  _ just like Levitan! _ ” he cried. He furiously wiped his eyes on his wrist, and it was then that Dana realized he was crying. “I’m just like ‘em! I-I’m fuckin’ hot blooded and I hit stuff when I get mad. I-I even  _ heal  _ like ‘em, ‘cept I can’t even do  _ that  _ right!” He punched the branch again with his other hand. 

“Ryan, you’re hurting yourself,” said Dana softly.

“I don’t care!” He hit the branch again. His other hand was bloody, too. “ _ Fuck! _ I’m just a shit copy of Levitan Reeves, and I ain’t  _ ever  _ gonna be better than ‘em!”

“Ryan, that’s not true,” said Dana, putting her hand on the trunk of the tree. “You’re your own person. I think you’re more than Levitan ever could be.”

“Nobody’s  _ ever  _ gonna see me as anything more than Levitan’s son!” he said bitterly. “I-I can’t even  _ heal  _ as good as ‘em! Look!” He rolled up his pant leg.

Dana squinted up at him. “What am I looking at?”

“This scar!” said Ryan frantically, waving his hand at his leg. 

Dana looked, and sure enough there was a long white scar on his knobbly knee. “Oh, I see it.”

Ryan pulled his pant leg down with a sharp tug. “Levitan didn’t always have their abilities, but once they did, their injuries  _ never  _ left scars!  _ Never! _ For me, my knees are  _ shredded  _ from falling so many times when I was a kid. It takes me  _ way  _ longer to heal from even something like  _ this! _ ” He held out his hands. Blood ran down his fingers and dripped to the ground.

Dana sighed. “Ryan, come down.”

“No.” He folded his arms. “I don’t wanna.”

Frustration at him burned in her chest and mingled with her residual anger, but she wasn’t about to give into it so easily. “Fine, then hang tight.”

Ryan glared down at her as she heaved herself up onto a branch, then dug her claws into the trunk of the tree to help her climb up onto the next one. She settled on the branch just below him and looked down. They were high up from the ground. She could see a little stream weaving its way through the undergrowth.

Ryan was grumbling to himself about Levitan and  _ how could they do that _ and  _ I thought it would be different when we were together again. _

Dana couldn’t help it. Tears welled up in her eyes as her frustration turned into sadness. She put a hand over her face and took a shaking breath.

Ryan’s ranting abruptly stopped. He shifted and peered down at her, realizing his mistake.

“Sorry,” said Ryan quietly. “I guess I should’a asked if  _ you  _ were okay. Lev  _ did  _ kinda attack you.”

“I-I’m okay,” she said. Her throat felt tight. She sobbed softly, hiding her face from Ryan.

She heard the leaves rustle above her as Ryan shifted his position. She paused when she felt a fingertip touch one of the horns that protruded from her head. She looked up at him to see that he was stretched out on the branch, lying down on his stomach, with one arm wrapped around it and the other extended out towards her.

“Sorry for bein’ selfish,” said Ryan. “Wish I could make it up to you.”

Dana chuckled as she wiped her tears from her face. “See? I told you.”

“Told me what?” he asked.

“You’re  _ already  _ better than Levitan.”

Ryan withdrew his hand sharply. He didn’t meet her gaze. “I… I guess when I busted ‘em outta Monsoon, I’d sorta thought that things would go back to the way they used to be. They didn’t.”

“I guess not,” she said. “I thought that with Levitan joining us in LA, things would be so much better. Things are different, but not really better.”

“We helped people.”

“You got to be with your parent again.”

Ryan sighed. “I thought they were a different person. When I was little, they were always there for me. They took care of me. They never drank, they only smoked outside, and aside from the occasional spank on the ass, they were patient with me. Things were good.”

“There was a lot they probably kept from you.”

“Yeah, probably,” said Ryan. “I mean, all their issues didn’t  _ just  _ spring up from five years in Monsoon. They were in Monsoon before, they were in war... they’d lived a hard life.”

“Like what?”

Ryan opened his mouth to reply, then he slowly closed it, realization dawning on his face.

“What?” asked Dana.

“Holy shit. I… I don’t know  _ anything  _ about Levitan  _ at all. _ ”

Dana picked at her claws. She almost gagged when she noticed that there was a sliver of skin caught in the nail. She hastily drew her claws along the tree trunk to clean them of blood.

“What do we do, now?” asked Ryan quietly.

“I… I dunno,” said Dana.

“We could go try to catch Mikey,” suggested Ryan, trying to lighten the mood.

“I’m not really in the mood for chasing a duck.”

“That’s fine.” He tapped his finger on the branch. “We could just hang out here for awhile.”

“Sure. That would be nice.”

“Like pumas, the predators of the trees.”

Dana giggled. “Sure, we can be mountain lions.”

“Puma is a better word,” said Ryan. He had a slight smile on his face. As soon as he glanced down at his hand, the look disappeared.

“What?” asked Dana.

“Look.” He held up his hand. His knuckles had scabbed over and finally healed.

“The cuts are gone,” said Dana.

“Yeah, but look closer.”

Dana squinted, then she saw them. Small scars littered his knuckles. They were pale and crisscrossed his tanned hands. “Oh.”

“Those aren’t gonna go away,” said Ryan bitterly.

“Oh, I’m sorry.”

“No. I want ‘em there.” Ryan rested his chin on his folded hands. “Don’t let me fall asleep, here. I don’t wanna wake up by hittin’ the ground.”

“Don’t worry, I won’t,” said Dana. She poked his nose with her claw.

Ryan smiled a little, caught her hand with his and linked their fingers. Dana let him hold the weight of her arm, even though the way they were holding hands was kinda awkward.

Still felt nice, though.

 

Levitan kicked a pebble with their cowboy boot as they walked back towards their trailer. A few days had passed since their big fight with Akio, and they’d been in a low mood ever since. They’d barely seen Akio during this time, aside from early in the morning and late at night. It wasn’t that Levitan was  _ avoiding  _ him, it’s just that they wanted to give him space and some time to think. You know, in case he wanted to make a big decision like, say, breaking up with them.

They hadn’t seen Ryan at all since the fight, except in passing. He tended to disappear just as soon as Levitan walked into the room.

Maybe it was just as well.

“Ahem.”

Levitan turned when they heard a throat clearing behind them. James stood there, wearing sunglasses and an open shirt.

“Hi,” said Levitan quietly. They hadn’t really talked to him since he’d punched them in the face.

“You look really down.” James beckoned them over to two lawn chairs in front of his trailer. “Sit.”

“Alright,” said Levitan, not looking at him. They plopped down, leaned heavily back into their chair and let out a long breath.

“Something’s on your mind,” said James.

“Not even gonna preface that with a “ _ hey, buddy, wanna talk about it _ ”?” asked Levitan dryly. “I like how you go straight for the jugular, James. I respect that in a man.”

James gave them a deadpan look. “Levitan, I know something’s bothering you. You don’t have to say anything if you don’t want.”

“I dunno. It’s kinda obvious, ain’t it?” They flicked a nonexistent speck of dust off of their cargo pants. “You don’t gotta beat ‘round the bush. What happened to  _ goin’ for the jugular? _ ”

“I’m just trying to be sensitive,” said James tersely. He folded his hands together. “Levitan, I don’t want you to feel like shit. You’re my  _ friend. _ ”

“What, so suddenly I ain’t allowed to wallow in self-pity?” asked Levitan.

“A little wallowing is okay,” said James, “But a lot of people need you, and you can’t do this to yourself for your own sake. I know the big fight you had is bugging you, still. Have you talked to Akio at all?”

“... Not really,” they admitted. “Not since it happened.”

“Why not?” he persisted. “I thought you guys wanted to talk things through.”

“I’m just trying to give him some space,” said Levitan. They stared at their toes, wiggling them inside their boots. “I figured he might want some distance from me an’ all my shit.”

“Have you  _ asked  _ him whether he wants distance or are you just going ahead and making him feel abandoned?” asked James.

Levitan finally looked up at him. “Wait. Shit. You don’t think he feels  _ abandoned,  _ does he?”

James gave a shrug. “I wouldn’t know, I’m not Akio.”

Levitan puffed out their cheeks and let out a breath. “Shit.” They dragged a hand down their face. “God. Why doesn’t he just dump my stupid ass already?”

“Lev, this is really easy to fix,” said James. “Just use your brain and go  _ talk  _ to him.”

“I don’t wanna burden him with my problems,” they mumbled.

“Are you guys equal in your relationship?” he asked.

They fidgeted a bit. “Well… yeah. Of course.”

“Then for every problem he lets you help with,  _ you  _ can let  _ him  _ help with one of  _ yours. _ Got it?” James gave half a smile. “That’s the point of a  _ partnership,  _ right?”

Levitan gave him an irritated look. “Why are you so fuckin’ smart, James?”

“How do you somehow manage to make a compliment sound like an insult?” asked James teasingly, cuffing them lightly on the shoulder.

Levitan chuckled. “It’s a gift.”

A gaggle of younger mutants walked by. The girl with the pink hair who James had been chasing after didn’t spare him a glance as she passed.

“Ooh,” said Levitan. “What did you do to piss  _ her  _ off?”

James waved a hand dismissively. “Ah, nothing. She was just hoping I’d be a little more conventional in some ways.”

“Bummer,” said Levitan. “Her loss. You’re a helluva guy, James… even though you’re goin’ after ladies half your age.”

“Shut up,” said James without anger. “Anyway, it doesn’t matter. She’s pretty, but a bit of an airhead. Lucky for us, there’s about two hundred mutants at this place, plenty for me to choose from.”

“And how many are underage, monogamous, or uninterested?” asked Levitan slyly.

“Too many,” said James flatly. “But there’s still enough left over.”

“Naomi might beat you to the punch,” said Levitan. “I’ve heard some stuff. She’s on a spree. Fuckin’ unstoppable, that woman is.”

“Since when are  _ you  _ a part of the rumour mill?” asked James with amusement.

“Since I heard the words, “ _ four hands means four dicks _ ” floating around the mess hall one morning while I was trying to drink coffee,” said Levitan in a deadpan tone.

“Oh my god,” said James, his voice cracking as he tried not to laugh.

“I took my coffee  _ without  _ cream that morning.”

James let out a burst of laughter and slapped his thigh. “ _ Oh my god! _ ”

“Although I guess that could be  _ seven  _ dicks if you include orifices,” mused Levitan. “Or maybe even eight or nine if she got creative.”

“Jesus Christ, keep your voice down. We don’t need her overhearing and getting ideas,” said James. He giggled a little, then coughed. He had a silly grin on his face when he said, “So, what’s your plan, now?”

“I dunno,” said Levitan with a sigh. “Might go for a walk, or try ride one o’ the horses. Maybe I’ll throw myself a pity party with a cake that says “ _ I’m a Monster _ ” in curlicues.”

“Nope, wrong,” said James. “There was a  _ correct  _ answer to that question.”

“Oh. Uh.” They paused, searching their mind. “What was it?”

“ _ Go talk to Akio! _ ” James pushed their shoulder. “Go, go, go!”

Levitan groaned but reluctantly got to their feet. “Alright, fine. If it goes tits up, I’m gonna come right back here and lie face-down in the dirt.”

“Okay,” said James. “But when I’m right, and I will be, you’re gonna do a hundred pushups with me sitting on your back.”

“No, I’m not,” they said, waving as they walked away. “Nice try, James.”

James chuckled as they made their way down the dirt road.

Levitan kicked dust up from under their boots as they walked down to the green trailer. There was a good chance that Akio would be there, Levitan had seen him run off with that other Japanese mutant after lunch.

Levitan hopped up the step of the trailer and rapped their knuckles on the door. Every part of them believed that this was a bad idea.

“ _ Come in! _ ” came Akio’s voice.

The door creaked as Levitan pushed it open. They peered around the corner and saw Akio and Naoki seated together, a laptop sitting open on the table between them/ Akio waved his hands as he talked animatedly in Japanese. Naoki nodded along, occasionally interjecting his own thoughts. Levitan was a little bit rusty on the language, but as far as they could tell they were talking about Monsoon Osaka and emails.

“Hey,” said Levitan.

“Hi, Lev,” said Akio. There was a hint of hesitance in his voice. He hastily closed the laptop. Levitan cringed inwardly when they realized that he was afraid of angering them by bringing up Japan again.

“I just came by to see how you were doing,” they said evenly. “What were you guys talkin’ ‘bout?”

“Oh, um,” said Akio, glancing at Naoki. Naoki didn’t meet his eyes.

“Somethin’ the matter?” asked Levitan.

“Nah,” said Akio, waving a hand. He didn’t sound at all convincing. “You wouldn’t be interested.”

“I’m always interested in what you have to say, darlin’,” said Levitan. They folded their arms and leaned against the wall of the trailer. “What is it?”

Akio gave them a pained look that made Levitan’s toes curl in displeasure. “Well, uh, I-I know you’re not  _ super  _ interested or up for this, but Naoki and I just got an email from one of the mutants in Osaka.”

“I’m interested,” said Levitan. “What did she have to say?”

“... Just that it would be useful to have a mutant like me who knew what Monsoon was like on the inside there to help out,” he mumbled, “Since most of the mutants on their base were born outside of captivity.”

“Outside of captivity?” asked Levitan. They scratched their chin. “Huh.”

“What?” he asked warily.

“Nothin’, that’s just not usually the case for over here,” they said. “Most mutants I’ve met in my life were escapees, attempted disposals, or they were broken out by other mutants. Not a whole lotta second generation mutants floatin’ ‘round as far as I know, and I can’t think of when I’ve ever met a  _ third  _ generation mutant.”

“Really?” he asked curiously.

“Really,” said Levitan. “Might be worth lookin’ more into.”

“You think so?” His eyes shone with excitement, and Levitan felt that soft spot for him in their heart growing warm. He his smile was so sincere. He was overwhelmingly sweet.

Levitan didn’t feel deserving at all.

“Could be worth it,” they said, trying to keep a smile on their face and failing. Jesus, they probably looked constipated.

“Is everything okay?” he asked tentatively.

“I’m fine,” they said. “Don’t worry ‘bout me none.”

Akio stood from the booth and walked over to them. Naoki opened up the laptop to continue typing, glad to ignore them.

“I don’t mind worrying about you,” he said, taking their hand. “Wanna step outside for a minute?”

Levitan was  _ not  _ ready to talk about their feelings. “I already interrupted y’all enough,” they said, not looking at him. “I hope you wouldn’t mind puttin’ that off until bed, tonight when we’ll have more time to ourselves?”

“Alright,” he said slowly. “I suppose I don’t mind. We will talk though, right?”

“Of course,” they said. It was official, they were a huge chicken. They smiled a little and gave his hand a squeeze before heading back out the door. “I’ll see you tonight, darlin’. Keep me posted about Osaka, won’t you?”

“Okay,” he said. He gave a little sigh and had a slightly dreamy smile on his face.

“What’s with the look?” they asked, one hand on the door.

“Nothing,” he said, shaking his head quickly. “I was just remembering that cherry blossom season is coming up back home, in just a few months. It’s always lovely, all the trees are so pink and there are all kinds of festivals. I wasn’t there for it last year, because I moved to America just before it started.” He shrugged. “It happens.”

Levitan smiled. “I’d like to see it someday.”

“I’d love to take you,” he said earnestly. “My offer to take us to Japan still stands, you know. Just as a thought. No pressure, of course.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” they said, meaning every word of that sentence. “In the meantime, I’ll let you two get back to it.” They put a foot out the door. “See you tonight, darlin’.”

“Bye!” He plopped back down on the seat right away. Naoki turned the laptop towards him to show him something and the two of them burst into laughter immediately and started speaking in fast Japanese. 

Levitan tore their eyes away and left the green trailer.

They were fresh outta ideas of what to do. They’d chopped every single block of wood in the shed. Nobody was hounding them for shooting lessons, pestering them for information, or begging them to demonstrate their abilities to prove that they were  _ really  _ who they said they were. Yumi didn’t need them for anything, and neither did anybody else.

They hadn’t felt this  _ useless  _ in a good while.

They didn’t want to walk past James and get sent straight back into the green trailer to talk with Akio, so they decided to walk the long way around through the woods and head towards the barn. Maybe they could shovel hay or groom the horses. Manual labour always made them feel grounded.

Twigs and dry grass crunched under their feet as they walked along the forest path, their hands in their pockets. Their head felt muddled and groggy, even though they were sure they’d gotten enough sleep and had enough coffee to drink. They tried counting their footsteps as they walked to keep their mind on course.

There was a crunch in the woods in front of them. They stopped dead in their tracks, their hand reaching for the hunting knife on their hip.

Before they could react, Ryan turned the corner on the path and bumped right into them.

“Whoa,” he said, then he noticed that he was standing right in front of Levitan. He looked away. “Hey Lev.” He tried to step around them.

“Easy, Squirt,” said Levitan, putting their hands on his shoulders and stopping him. “Where are ya off to in such a hurry?”

“Said I’d meet Dana.” He tried to brush their hands off but they held him firmly. “Let go, Lev.”

“Why are you lyin’ to me?” they asked.

“I’m  _ not! _ ” His voice cracked. Dead giveaway. He coughed into his fist and said in an almost comically deeper voice, “I’m not.”

“I won’t keep ya long, then,” they said, easing one hand off of his shoulder. “I just haven’t seen you all that much, lately.”

“Yeah, well, stuff happens,” he said. He casually tried to pull away from them.

Something ugly twisted in Levitan’s heart. They knew something was wrong, but unfortunately they felt about as articulate as a tape dispenser, at the moment. They dug their fingers into his shoulder just a tad.

Ryan shot them a look of mixed fear and disgust when he felt their fingers tighten. “What, are you gonna throw  _ me  _ around and yell  _ me, too? _ ”

Those words felt like a kick to the stomach. Levitan lessened their grip. “Of course not, son.”

“Did you say that to Akio, too?” Ryan finally pulled away from them. “Leave me  _ alone,  _ Lev. I don’t really wanna talk to you, right now.”

“Why not?” they asked, masking their hurt with irritation. “I’m your parent, why are you avoiding me?”

“I-I’m just tryin’ to wrap my head ‘round a whole lotta stuff right now, Lev, and you’re not helping,” he said. His hands were clenched into fists.

“Ryan, I can help,” said Levitan, fighting to keep their voice calm and low. “I’m not as dumb as I look. What’s on your mind?”

“What’s on my  _ mind  _ is that all of this is a fuckin’ joke!” he said loudly, waving his hand. “I thought things were gonna be normal when I busted you out, y’know? I-I thought we were gonna be safe, and we were gonna take care of each other, b-but you’re a fuckin’  _ wreck! _ ” He pointed an accusing finger at them.

Levitan felt the anger bubbling in their chest, but they viciously shoved it down. “I’m sorry that I can’t be what you want me to be.”

“It’s not what I  _ want  _ you to be, it’s what I  _ need  _ you to be!” he said. “You’re a fuckin’  _ mess! _ I did better when I was on my own than you are doin’ right now with all of us here!”

“Ryan, there’s a lot at play here that you don’t understand,” they said. There was a slight tremor of anger in their voice.

“Oh, so you think I’m just some dumb kid, do you?” he asked loudly. “Fine! I don’t give a shit!” He stormed past them, checking his shoulder with theirs. He miscalculated how sturdy Levitan was, and ramming into them did more damage to him than it did to them. He stumbled and continued to walk at a fast clip.

“Ryan, listen to me!” said Levitan, turning on their heel and walking after him. They were approaching the main road of the settlement again. They grabbed his wrist, just as they reached the area behind the trailers. “I’m still kinda fucked up after bein’  _ captured  _ and  _ tortured,  _ I thought you’d be a lil’ more understandin’ of that!”

Ryan yanked his hand from their grasp and pointed at them with it. “Lev,  _ you’re the adult! _ You’re supposed to be grown-up enough to handle your own, but instead I gotta see you at your worst! It ain’t my job to support you!”

“ _ I never said it was! _ ” said Levitan exasperatedly. “Son, people make mistakes. You’re holdin’ me up to a level of perfection that I can’t achieve. I ain’t good ‘nough for that. I’m too fucked up.”

“Yeah, I can see that,” he said loudly. Out of the corner of Levitan’s eye, they saw a few mutants turning their heads towards them. “Between you shoving Akio around, drinking yourself stupid when you lost him, risking your goddamn neck to break his ass out, being completely unreasonable, going  _ crazy  _ and wrecking everthin’ in your path whenever somethin’ happens, actin’ like a child, and never lettin’ me drive the car, it’s kinda fuckin’ hard to figure out why people put you up on a pedestal all the damn time.”

“ _ I didn’t ask for it! _ ” Levitan snapped. “I didn’t ask for it to be this way! I didn’t ask to be made into this… this…  _ thing! _ ” They held up their hands with emphasis, the hands that could tear a person apart like they were stringed cheese. “Every part of the way I am was fashioned to be this way through means outside of my control! I’d give  _ everything  _ to have a normal, happy, peaceful life! I’d give  _ everything  _  just to be able to  _ die! _ ”

“Big whoop,” he said through gritted teeth. He turned and started to stomp away again.

Levitan caught up with him quickly. They were on the main road, now. Levitan could feel the eyes of the nearby mutants on them, but they were too upset to care.

“Ryan, I’m not doing this on purpose!” they said desperately. “I ain't turnin’ the blame away from myself, I am responsible for my own faults, but don’t you think I’d give  _ anything  _  to be a better parent for you? Don’t you think I’d  _ do anything  _  just so you could go to school, have friends, join the football team, and live a normal life?”

“I dunno, Lev!” he said, throwing his hands up in the air. “We never had a chance at that anyhow, so what’s the fuckin’ point?”

“My  _ point  _ is I love you, son!” said Levitan. “I love you, I’m tryin’ my best, and I  _ know  _ it ain’t good enough sometimes-”

“- _ ever _ ,” he interjected harshly.

Levitan took a deep breath and tried to relax. They did  _ not  _ want their fight to escalate to the level their fight with Akio had gotten to. “Ryan, please try and be more understanding.”

“ _ Fuck you, no I won’t! _ ”

Levitan’s blood was boiling. People were watching, but they began to blur away as their vision focussed on Ryan. “ _ Son, you need to calm down! _ We gotta talk this out and get on with our lives, there’s places we need to go and-”

“Like what?” asked Ryan sharply. “You ain’t plannin’ on  _ leaving,  _ are you?”

“Ryan, I didn’t say that,” they growled.

“What, are you planning on headin’ off on some wild alcohol-fueled adventure so you can get away from me?” he asked hysterically. “Plannin’ on doin’ some recon work abroad and leavin’ me back here while you sit on some beach drinking mojitos?”

“For god’s sake, Ryan, I wouldn’t go to the  _ bahamas,  _ we were discussin’  _ Japan! _ ”

Ryan stopped cold. He glowered at them. “So you  _ are  _ planning on leaving.”

Levitan could have kicked themself. They rubbed their eyes with their fingers and took a deep, shuddering breath. “We haven’t even  _ discussed it yet,  _ and that ain’t the focus of this argument!”

“You’re gonna ditch me and leave me behind again!” he cried with tears in his eyes. “Y-you were gonna go have fun somewhere with your  _ boyfriend  _ and leave me behind!” He wiped his eyes on the sleeve of his jacket.

Levitan softened. They stepped up and laid a hand on his shoulder. “Son, it’s not a  _ competition  _ between-”

Ryan slapped their hand off viciously. “ _ Fuck off, Lev!  _ Stop tryin’ to coddle me!”

“Ryan, stop!” they said angrily, shaking their sore fingers. “I don’t  _ want  _ us to fight like this!”

“ _ Well I don’t want you as my parent! _ ” he yelled.

“ _ Well I didn’t want you as my kid, so I fucking win! _ ” they roared.

“You… what?” asked Ryan, his voice cracking.

Levitan’s anger was already boiling over. “ _ You were an unwanted pregnancy! _ I fucked my handler back in the days when I was a fuckin’  _ mercenary,  _ murdered him the day after, and lo and behold, there you were! The fuckin’ pink plus on that _ stupid white stick! _ ”

Ryan looked like he couldn’t believe this. His eyes were wide and his mouth flapped, but no words came out.

Levitan was already on a roll. “I couldn’t afford an abortion, and the mutants who were gonna adopt you disappeared at the  _ very  _ last minute, so I was forced to keep you! I searched  _ everywhere  _ for a place to dump your ass off, but in the end you kinda grew on me so I kept you ‘round anyways!”

“But-” he started.

“ _I didn’t want you!_ _Is that clear enough for you?_ ” they growled.

Ryan looked shocked and horrified. As soon as Levitan had shut their  _ fat stupid mouth,  _ they realized that they’d just made their worst mistake yet. They tried to amend it with, “Fuck. Oh, shit, Ryan I’m so-”

“Y-you always told me I was a  _ surprise _ and that you didn’t know who my real dad was!” Ryan said. His fists were clenched. He kicked the dirt like an angry bull. “ _ Why would you tell me those things?! _ ”

“I’m so sorry, Ryan!” they said. “I-I was just mad, you were never supposed to-”

“You know what?  _ I’m sick of your bullshit excuses, Levitan! _ ” Ryan walked right up to them, tears in his eyes. “You do whatever the  _ fuck  _ you want. You can go drink, smoke, start fights, or fuck off to Japan for all I care!  _ I don’t give a shit anymore! _ ”

“Ryan, no, I’m so sorry!” they said pleadingly.

“ _ Go to hell, Levitan! _ ” he shouted. They were toe to toe. “If you didn’t want me then,  _ why the fuck would you want me, now?! _ ”

“Ryan, things are  _ different- _ ”

“Are they?” he growled. His eyes were dark. He was trembling.

Levitan was torn between wanting to scream at him and wanting to cry. They’d never meant for this to happen, Ryan was never supposed to know about that, he was one of the most important people in their whole stupid life, how could they let themself-

Before Levitan could form a reply of any kind, Ryan did something. He snorted, and he spat right in their face.

Spittle hit Levitan on their jaw and cheek. It dribbled down and dripped onto their leather bomber jacket.

Levitan couldn’t find the words. There was a deep, aching, unfamiliar hurt in their chest. They’d never hurt like this before. They’d done something horribly wrong, a whole bunch of somethings, and this was what it added up to.

They wished that their son would have dignified them with a punch to the face, but they didn’t even deserve that. 

Ryan didn’t say a word. He did nothing but glare, his eyes meeting Levitan’s in an unfaltering gaze of pure malice. Ryan took after his parent in more ways than he could ever know.

Levitan was suddenly conscious of the crowd of people that had gathered. Glancing around, they could pick out Naomi, Hawke, James, Dana, Tanner, Yumi, Naoki and Akio. With the sudden silence that fell, they could hear the gasps and murmurs in the crowd.

Naomi and Hawke looked at each other, scared of what would happen next. Yumi appeared to be shocked at what she saw. Dana looked horrified, Tanner and Naoki looked confused. James’s face was expressionless. Akio had his hands over his mouth and his eyes were wide with fear and sympathy.

Part of Levitan wanted to scream at Ryan. It was a very small part.

Levitan closed their eyes, wiped the spit from their cheek with the sleeve of their leather jacket, and turned away. The crowd parted before them, and they began to walk back towards the barn, which was where they’d tried to go in the first place.

A chorus of voices burst up from behind them as they left, but they didn’t turn back to look. They could hear their friends shouting, demanding to know what had happened, they could hear Akio’s voice pleading for them to come back, but above it all, they could hear Ryan yelling after them.

“ _ You can’t just walk away! Get your ass back here, let’s finish this! I ain’t done with you,  yet! FUCK  YOU! _ ”

Levitan didn’t look back. It took every ounce of willpower they had to remain facing forward and to keep putting one foot in front of the other. Ryan had already won, even if he didn’t know it yet. He deserved this victory. He was a strong young man, and hopefully he would grow up to be a better person than Levitan ever was.

Giving him the room to do that would be the best gift Levitan could ever give him.

Nobody disturbed them while they were in the barn, grooming the horses and feeding the chickens.

 

Levitan didn’t speak to another soul all day. They kept to themself, went for walks in the woods, and sharpened their knives in peace. They slipped back into their trailer after dark and locked the door behind them.

“Are you okay?”

Levitan turned to see Akio sitting up in bed, wearing one of Levitan’s t-shirts and holding a book. It was one of the ones that Levitan had dug out of the library a few days ago and left on the table in their trailer.

“I’m fine,” they said, their voice hoarse.

“Bullshit.”

“Yeah, bullshit.” They leaned heavily against the door, kicked off their boots, and unbuckled their belt. “I’m gonna shower.”

“Okay,” he said. “I’ll be right here.”

“Okay.” They were tempted to ask him for company, but they didn’t want to demand that of him. They stepped into the tiny bathroom, stripped out of their clothes, and ran the shower.

It was punishingly cold, just the way they wanted it. They put their hands over their face, holding back their tears. They had to be strong and tough, just like always. So much had happened recently, they didn’t have time to feel weak or vulnerable. They were too busy patching up their mistakes.

They scrubbed shampoo through their short hair, rinsed, then turned off the shower. Their skin was as red as a boiled lobster. They towelled off in a hurry, pulled on their boxers and a shirt, then opened the door.

Akio was waiting patiently for them. He opened the covers so they could crawl in beside him.

Levitan snagged a book from the table and stood pensively by the bed.

“Are you… sure you wouldn’t rather I sleep somewhere else?” they mumbled.

“Yes. I’m sure,” said Akio. “I think you need me, right now.”

A few answers sprang to mind, none of which seemed smart to voice aloud. They wanted to say, “ _ no I don’t, I’m fine, don’t worry about me _ ” _ , _ and, “ _ you don’t know what you’re saying, why would you want this with me _ ” _ ,  _ and, “ _ are you going to spit in my face, too _ ”? They wisely kept their mouth shut and slid under the blankets.

Akio leaned his head on their shoulder, then recoiled. “Jesus! You’re as cold as ice.”

“Ice shower,” they murmured. They opened the book, grateful that it had large enough print for them to read easily without squinting.

Akio tilted his head to peek at the cover, then he widened his eyes. Levitan was reading a book about anger management.

“Hey,” he said, putting a hand on their forearm. “I’m really proud of you.”

“Why?” they grumbled, turning the page. “Nothin’ to be proud of.”

“You listened to me,” said Akio. “You heard me when I gave you my opinion about what you’re like when you’re angry, and you got that book. That’s more than a lot of people have done.”

Levitan gave a small smile. They didn’t really feel like smiling. “Hey, it’s really no big deal. That ain’t worth a parade.”

“Well,” he said. “I think it’s worth  _ something _ .”

Levitan felt knots in their chest. They felt like they were gonna throw up. Their eyes glazed over as they tried to read, and they were stuck reading the words, “ _ take deep breaths and keep calm _ ” over and over again.

“Is it okay if I bite the bullet right now?” asked Akio. “There’s some stuff we need to talk about.”

Denying that there was a problem had  _ not  _ worked well for Levitan last time, so they let out a sigh and closed their book. “Yeah, I guess there is.”

“What was that fight with Ryan about?” he asked tentatively.

“Everything. Nothing. I don’t know.” They dropped their book on the floor and put their face in their hands. “Th-that was the first time the two of us have talked since the day when you and I had that big fight.”

They felt a gentle hand on their shoulder. “Wanna talk about it?”

“No. Yes. Maybe, Fuck, I-I have no clue. Thinkin’ ‘bout it makes my head hurt an’ my stomach feel all gross.” They shook their head, their hands still over their face. “I can’t believe I  _ said  _ that to him. I can’t fuckin’ believe I did that. I’m the worst parent  _ ever. _ ”

“No, you’re not,” he reassured.

“ _ I just told my son I didn’t want him! _ Who  _ does  _ that?”

“You’re too hard on yourself,” said Akio. “Ryan’s been too hard on you, too. You were fighting, and he said some hurtful things, too.”

“He’s a kid. He doesn’t get it. He doesn’t know any better.” Their voice was choked, oh god they didn’t wanna cry over this, they’d already cried in front of Akio too many times. They wanted to be someone for him to lean on and someone who would protect him, they couldn’t be that if they broke down into tears at every adversity.

“I’m so sorry about that,” said Akio. “It must have been… awful.”

“It was  _ humiliating. _ He… he  _ spat  _ on me, Akio.” Their voice was cracked and broken. “ _ He spat on me. _ I-I wish he’d  _ hit  _ me or  _ something. _ ”

“I’m sorry, darling,” he said softly.

“Do you still wanna go to Japan?”

Akio frowned at the abrupt question. “What?”

“Do you still wanna go?” They lifted their head from their hands and looked over at him. Their eyes were red.

“Yes, I do,” he said, backing up slightly. “I’ve been in touch with one of the Osaka mutants. She’d be happy to have us.”

Levitan nodded, lips pressed tightly together. They hated how he cringed from them, they never wanted to see him look worried like that again. “If, uh, if you’re plannin’ on going soon, I’d like to join you. I’d rather go with you than have you go all on your lonesome. Y’know. If… if you’ll have me. I wanna be there for you.”

“Oh!” he said, pleasantly surprised. “Of course, Levitan. Why  _ wouldn’t  _ I want to take you?”

“I-I’ve been actin’ like a real piece of garbage, lately,” they said. “I ain’t that much fun to be ‘round, I got a whole  _ bucket  _ of problems to wade through, and… I-I dunno.”

Akio could tell that they  _ did  _ know. Normally he wouldn’t push it, but this time he decided that he had to. “Levitan, what else is bothering you?”

“I, uh.” Their voice was thick. Akio could tell they were close to tears. They inhaled and said in one breath, “ _ I’m no good for you and you should break up with me. _ ”

Akio was shocked by this. “Lev… is that really what you want?”

“ _ I don’t know what I want! _ ” they sobbed, pulling the blankets up to their face. Oh god, this was awful, they felt more naked than ever. They wanted to wince from Akio’s gentle hands on their back and shoulders, push him off and walk out of that trailer, but they were just too…  _ exhausted.  _ The crushing weight of the last few days finally broke the dam that was holding back all of their emotions, and the tears flowed, staining the blankets they held to their face.

Akio was murmuring soothing things in their ear. “Shh, darling, just let it all out. Don’t worry about crying, I won’t ever tell a soul.” He rubbed circles on their back as their shoulders shook with sobs. “This is good for you, baby. It’s not good to keep all that bottled up inside you.”

Levitan lifted their face and glanced at him sidelong. “Darlin’, y-you don’t gotta take care o’ me.”

“Yeah, I do,” he said softly. “Isn’t that what boyfriends do?”

“Mm. I guess.”

“Do you  _ really  _ wanna break up with me?” he asked, as though he was afraid of the answer.

Levitan shook their head quickly, face pressed back into the blankets.

“Then why did you say we should break up?”

“I-I think you can do better,” they said. They sat up straight and sniffled. “I think I’m no good for you. All I do is wreck stuff. You deserve so much better than my mess, and I don’t deserve you. You’re too good to me, Akio.” They wiped their nose and sniffed again. “You’re too good  _ for  _ me.”

“Baby, that’s not true,” said Akio. “I wanna be with  _ you. _ I care about  _ you,  _ okay?”

“I’m sorry I made you feel bad,” they mumbled. “I’m sorry for yelling. I’m sorry for acting out. I’m sorry for bein’ all stupid an’ mean like I get sometimes. I-I’m sorry for avoiding you for the last few days, I hope I didn’t make you worry too bad.”

“Only a little,” he said.

Levitan nodded. “Okay.” They took a breath, grabbed the water glass on the side table, and took a long drink. They sighed.

“Hey,” said Akio. “I’m really glad you told me all that was on your mind.”

“Really?” they asked skeptically. “I… I didn’t think you’d wanna know… or that you’d care.”

“I’m  _ offended, _ ” he said with a slight teasing tone. “Baby, I always wanna know if something is bothering you, okay? I can’t help if you don’t tell me.”

“You can’t help with all o’ this,” they mumbled, looking away. “I just fucked up my relationship with my son in one  _ stupid argument. _ I dunno if there’s anything anyone can do to fix what I just broke.”

“Maybe you two need a short break from each other,” said Akio. “You’re both hot-headed, god knows that you two are gonna butt heads once in awhile. Something like this was almost bound to happen.”

“So… Japan?”

“Only if you want to,” he said. “I want to be with you. We can stay in Austin, we can go to Japan, or we can go somewhere else entirely. I don’t care. I don’t care where we go, you could be on a life raft in the middle of the ocean and I’d want to be right there, by your side.”

“I never want to look upon the sea with my own two eyes,” said Levitan. Their lip quirked in amusement.

“How about we just go for a few weeks?” suggested Akio. “A month, tops. I’ll bring you right back here. You and Ryan will have had a chance to cool off and miss each other for a bit, we can get some information about Monsoon Osaka, and I can show you around Kyoto.”

“Hmm.”

“This will be good for you and Ryan,” said Akio. “Being cooped and forced to be together all the time can’t be good for your relationship.”

“Plus I keep fucking up.”

“Lev,” he said. “It’ll be fun. Are you in?”

Levitan smiled widely. “Yeah. I’m in.”

Akio grinned and planted a sloppy kiss on their cheek. “I can’t wait to show you my home, baby. We can go get ice cream at my favourite place, I’ll take you to all the cool temples in my city, and then we can drive over to Osaka and say hello to some mutants there.”

“It sounds wonderful, darlin’,” they said sincerely. They settled down into the blankets, ignoring the spot that was damp from their tears.

Akio shut out the light and curled up next to them. He threw one arm over their stomach and rested his cheek on their shoulder. “We can drive past my university, and I can show you around some of the best shopping areas, and we can go play arcade games…”

Levitan still felt the knot of anxiety in their chest, but it had loosened greatly. They fell asleep, lulled by Akio’s hushed and exuberant voice. It felt good to lean on him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaaaaand this was a challenge.  
> if you like what i'm up to, shoot me a comment!


	15. I Ain't No Quitter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levitan is hugely sentimental.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: brief torture mention, brief suicide mention, super blatant homophobia, q-slur, f-slur

Levitan had a duffel bag packed and waiting by the door of their trailer. It was unzipped, their clothes peeking out, neatly rolled and tucked snugly into place. At the top was space for a few more things, like their toothbrush and extra shoes. Levitan was loathe to leave behind their knives and weapons, but it wasn’t like they could carry those onto a plane without a whole rigamarole around it.

They hadn’t spoken to Ryan since their fight. They didn’t want to make things worse. Part of them didn’t think they could  _ possibly  _ fuck up any more than they already had, but the rest of them knew better. They totally could.

They wondered if things would ever be okay between the two of them again.

Levitan sat at the table in their little trailer, squinting down at the paper as they tried to write. They had good cursive from years of forced practice when they were in school, but they had to write large so they could see it properly.

“Hey.”

Levitan looked over their shoulder. Akio stood in the doorway, smiling awkwardly.

“How are you feeling?” he asked. He took a small step inside. His hands were in his pockets.

“Alright, I s’pose.” They looked back to their paper and scrawled a few more sentences. They were almost done the letter.

“Do you… wanna talk?” asked Akio tentatively. He walked over to them and leaned against the desk.

“I’m fine, darlin’. Don’t worry ‘bout me.” Their pen still scratched at the paper.

“I know you’re not fine.”

Levitan’s pen slipped. “Aw, fuck.” They scribbled out the word they were working on and looked up at him. “I don’t want you to fret ‘bout me or nothin’.”

“I  _ like  _ fretting ‘bout you,” he said in a cheesy imitation of their accent. “You’ve been so quiet for these past few days. It’s not like you.”

“I s’pose not.” They finished up their sentence and signed the letter before folding it in two. 

“Your handwriting is impossible to read,” said Akio.

“I learned to read n’ write in the year nineteen hundred,” they said, sliding the letter into an envelope. “All fancy n’ cursive, back then.”

“Wow. That’s pretty neat.” Akio smiled a little. “The passports are done.”

“Really?” Levitan pushed the envelope aside. “Lessee.”

Akio produced two blue booklets with a flourish. “Ta-da!”

Levitan took one and examined it. In their photo, they had huge bags under their eyes and a grim expression, but the passport itself looked perfectly authentic. “Wow, looks legit.”

“I know,” he said, looking at his.

“God, why do ID photos always look so fuckin’  _ ugly? _ ” they asked, snapping the passport closed.

“It’s a mystery to man,” said Akio with a chuckle. “But I think you look good in  _ every  _ photo.”

“Thanks, darlin’,” said Levitan. “Let’s see yours.”

Akio reluctantly handed over his passport. Levitan snorted. He’d had to remove his glasses and pull his hair away from his eyebrows for the photo, so he was squinting and his forehead looked greasy.

“Don’t laugh,” he said, pouting.

“Honey, you’re downright  _ adorable. _ ” They grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him down so they could kiss his cheek. “I gotta drive into town and do somethin’, today.”

“Want company?” he asked.

They thought about it, drumming their fingers on the table. “Well, it’s a bit of a ritual I do. I’ve always done it alone, but…”

“I understand,” said Akio honestly. “Do what you need to do, I’ll be right here when you come back.”

“... I’d like you to come,” they said quietly. “I wanna spend more time with you.”

“I’d love to join you.” He put his hand on theirs as it rested on the table. “What do you have to do?”

“Maybe it’ll be more fun if it’s a surprise,” they said. They got to their feet and stowed the letter in their jacket. “Hopefully you’ll find it as entertaining as I do.”

“I look forward to it.” He took their hand.

Levitan didn’t grip his hand in return, at first. Their eyes showed hesitance and remorse.

Akio traced his thumb over their knuckle. “Something wrong?”

“... I guess not,” they said slowly, linking their fingers together properly.

“It’s okay to feel upset,” he said. “God knows a lot has happened, lately.”

“I know.”

Akio believed that they were mindlessly saying the words they thought he wanted to hear. He didn’t want to challenge them and start another argument. He was happy that Levitan still cuddled with him at night and gave him sweet kisses. He was glad that they showed remorse and were slowly working their way through that anger management book. He didn’t want to disturb the calm waters.

He hated how he was still a little bit afraid of them. 

Levitan led him out to the car parked in front of the trailer. He felt them squeeze his fingers before he noticed what they saw.

Ryan was standing and talking with Dana and Tanner, his back to Levitan and Akio. He was too far away for them to hear what he was talking about, but he appeared to be gesturing emphatically with his hands.

Dana’s eyes locked with Levitan’s and she glared at them with venom. Tanner hung onto her arm, looking pensive. Ryan saw that they were staring over his shoulder and finally turned to see what they were staring at.

Akio could feel Levitan stiffen when Ryan saw them. Ryan’s eyes narrowed, and his expression became nasty, his mouth was screwed up like he tasted something bitter and vile.

Levitan sighed, gave a slightly weary smile, and raised their other hand in a casual wave. They didn’t try to say anything.

Ryan looked them over. Disgust showed clearly in every line on his face and every tense muscle in his body. Slowly, without breaking eye contact, he raised his middle finger at them. He was too far away to hear, but he mouthed “ _ Fuck you _ ”.

Levitan looked away quickly. Akio could feel them shaking. He was afraid.

They slowly untangled their fingers from his, walked around the car, and climbed into the driver’s seat. Akio slid into the passenger’s side and fastened his seatbelt as Levitan started the car and began to pull onto the dirt road.

Akio could see Ryan in the side mirror on the car. He had dropped his hand to his side, his shoulders were slumped, and he looked… lost. Akio glanced over at Levitan, who was deliberately staring straight ahead, before he craned his neck to look back at Ryan. His eyes were wide and vulnerable, and Akio was abruptly reminded that he was just a kid who was so far too young to be caught up in the middle of a war like this.

He disappeared in the dust as they bumped along the road.

 

Levitan didn’t say a word as they drove into Austin. They were silent and motionless for almost twenty whole minutes before they finally let the air settle and turned on the radio.

“Two stops,” they mumbled.

“Pardon?” asked Akio.

“We gotta make two stops,” said Levitan again. “One just outside o’ town, one right in the middle o’ the city.”

“Alright,” he said.

“First one ain’t too far from here,” they said. They turned off of the freeway, onto a smaller road.

“I look forward to it.” He cranked down the window a few notches to let some of the cool air into the stuffy car.

“Thanks for comin’ with me,” said Levitan. They still couldn’t bring themself to look at him. “Means a whole lot.”

“I’m really glad,” he said.

“I don’t really enjoy my own company, at the moment,” they said. “It’s nice to be with you and… forget about myself for a lil’ while.”

“I always enjoy your company,” he said with a smile.

“Not when you’re scared I’m gonna hit you,” they muttered bitterly.

Akio was taken aback by that. “I… Lev, I know you won’t hit me. You promised.”

Levitan kept their eyes on the highway. “Yeah. I did promise.”

Akio hated the way they said that. He frowned. “Promise me again. I don’t like the way you said that.”

“ _ Akio, for fuck’s- _ ” Levitan abruptly cut themself off. They took a deep breath, then let it all out. “Darlin’, I  _ promise  _ I won’t hit you.  _ Ever. _ I don’t wanna hurt you.”

Akio’s heart swelled with pride and affection. They’d come close to yelling, but they’d nipped it in the bud. They could control themself. He would be safe around them. “I trust you.” He reached over and traced his thumb down their strong jaw.

Levitan finally smiled a little. “I trust you too, darlin’.” They let their head lean against his hand.

Akio reluctantly pulled his hand away. He wanted to stroke his fingers across Levitan’s throat and collarbone, maybe even rest his hand on their thigh, but the two of them had been through so much, lately. He wasn’t sure whether Levitan would want him that way.

Levitan lazily spun the steering wheel with their thumb and they turned off of the road onto a dirt trail. It had been worn from many tires over the years, and they passed by a sign that said, “ _ Andersen Lake _ ”.

Akio desperately wanted to make Levitan feel good. He wanted to forget about the way they’d been on edge, lately. He just wanted to feel some pleasure, feel his skin against theirs.

The sunlight caught them through the window and illuminated their blonde hair and turned it golden. Their silver eyes were sharp and clear. The sight of them stole Akio’s breath away.

They were beautiful.

Levitan turned the key in the ignition and shut the car off. “We’re here.”

Akio climbed out of the car and shut the door behind him. He was standing at the edge of a small lake. A farmhouse was in the distance, and there was a large pasture with a few cattle grazing.

“Why are we here?” he asked curiously.

“Nostalgia,” said Levitan, taking his hand. “This way.”

Akio linked his fingers with theirs as they pulled him over to the pasture. Levitan’s palm was sweaty against his.

“It’s nice, out here,” he said.

“Mmhmm. Sure is.” Levitan took a deep breath. “Whole lotta stuff has changed since I was young, but not the way this place smells on a warm winter afternoon.”

Akio began to put the pieces together as they walked up to the pasture. There was a wooden fence at the edge of the field. Levitan untangled their hands, then leaned against the fence, elbows resting on top, hands folded together.

“Why are we here?” he asked, even though he believed he already knew the answer.

“The old barn fell down about fifty years ago,” they said. “The house was gone long before that, levelled and cleared to make way for a new estate. The barn was over there.” They pointed to the far end of the pasture. “House was just to the right of it.” They moved their finger over. A few cattle stood there, now. “Right where we’re standin’ used to be where I’d play when I was small.”

Akio looked down at the dirt, as if expecting to see a younger version of Levitan sitting there, poking at the mud with a stick. He could hardly picture Levitan as a child. Part of him believed that they just popped out as a full-grown adult.

“This place used to be more woodsy,” they said. “It’s been cleared to make room for more pasture. I had a little fort made outta sticks right over…” They pointed towards the lake, where a little cluster of trees were. “ _ There. _ C’mon.”

Akio followed Levitan over to the trees, trying to picture what this place would have looked like a hundred years ago.

“Right here,” said Levitan, touching a tree. “This was just a lil’ saplin’, back then.” They stood on tiptoe and craned their neck upwards. “Ah, lookit.”

Akio squinted and looked up. Way up on the bark of the tree was a lumpy portion that looked like it had been carved up with a knife and grown over long ago. He couldn’t make out what it was supposed to say. Below it, there were several other carvings, each younger than the last, and there was one just above eye level that he could make out clearly. It was the letters “ _ L.R. _ ”.

“Did you do that?” he asked.

“Yep.” Their hand rested on his shoulder. “I was nine and I borrowed my Pa’s knife to make some spears for self defence. I also carved my initials on that tree. Every time I come back here, I carve ‘em again.” They flicked out their knife and stepped up to the tree. Akio watched as, with a few quick motions, the letters “ _ L.R. _ ” were carved into the trunk.

“Here.” Levitan handed him the knife.

“What’s this for?” he asked curiously.

“Add your initials,” they said, pulling him over to the tree. “I’d like it if you did. Please.”

“I can do that,” he said with a smile. Levitan watched as he slowly carved “ _ A.S. _ ” into the tree, just below their initials. He took his time with the curves of the “S”, paying just a bit too much attention to Levitan’s hands on his shoulders.  “There.”

“Thank you,” they said softly as they took the knife back. “Means a lot to me.”

“You never struck me as sentimental,” he said.

“Well, I am.” They reached into the pocket of their coat and pulled out the polaroid camera. He pulled him into a hug and held the camera away from them, at arm’s length. “Say cheese, darlin’.”

Akio grinned and held his fingers in a peace sign as Levitan snapped a photo. The camera hummed as it printed out, then Levitan plucked it out and began to shake it. “Let’s see how this turns out.”

Akio took the camera from them. “One more!”

“Alright, if you insist,” they said with a small smile.

Akio held up the camera, turned Levitan’s head with his fingers, then pressed a sweet kiss to their lips. Levitan leaned into it, then their eyes snapped open when they heard the shutter of the camera and saw the flash behind their closed eyes.

Akio giggled as he took the photo and began to shake it. “I bet you look cute in this one!”

Levitan smiled and kissed him again. “Not as cute as you,” they mumbled, their lips touching his.

Akio leaned his head against their shoulder. He felt grateful that they were sharing this with him. “Sure is pretty, out here.”

“Yeah. It sure is.” They looked down at their photo as it began to develop. “Oh christ, did you  _ really  _ have to throw up a hand sign? You ain’t no  _ gangster! _ ”

Akio giggled. “It’s just a peace sign, Lev.” He handed the camera back to them, still shaking his polaroid. He could see the picture slowly developing. “Aw.”

Levitan looked down at his photo and smiled. “That’s real sweet. I know just where to put mine.”

“In your wallet?” he suggested.

“Nah. I lose my wallet every goddamn year. I have a special place to put it, which is where we’re goin’, next.”

“I’m excited,” he said.

He climbed into the car with Levitan and they started the engine. He craned his neck to look behind them as they pulled away from Lake Andersen. 

He looked down at the photo in his hands. It was fully developed. He could see that Levitan was blushing. He tucked it into his jacket pocket, next to his heart.

“Hey,” he said. “Can I ask you something?”

“Anything, darlin’.”

“Did I ever tell you that you give me butterflies?” he asked. He glanced up at Levitan.

They chuckled. “I can’t recall. Honey, you make my heart pound real hard, y’know? I feel like a teenager again when you kiss me in the way you do.”

“The way I do?”

“All gentle.” They pulled off of the bumpy road, back onto the highway. “You’re sweet as sugar, darlin’. How in this great good earth did I nab a fella like you?”

“You kidnapped me at gunpoint from my place of employment, as far as I recall,” he said.

“How could I forget?” they asked with a smile. “Jeez, if you’d told me back then that less than a year later, I’d end up with you… well, I would’a told ya to go dunk your head until your brain got itself sorted.”

“If you’d told  _ me  _ that I’d be dating the person who abducted me and blasted my brains out, then tried to  _ bury me alive,  _ I would’ve called you crazy.” He giggled. “Well, I always thought you were handsome.” He reached out and ran a finger along their jaw. “You’ve got a really nice face.”

Levitan laughed. They took his wrist and kissed his fingers. “You’ve got a nice face too, baby.”

Akio chuckled. Levitan held his hand as they drove down the highway, a small smile on their lips. Akio fiddled with the radio.

It was a good twenty minute drive to their next destination. Neither of them particularly spoke during this time, but it was a comfortable silence. The rural woods and fields turned to busy streets as they approached the east side of the city. Jazz music played on the radio. There was a saxophone solo.

“I learned how to play part of this when I was in high school,” said Akio fondly.

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“I can play more than just harmonica, y’know.”

“Like what?”

“Piano, guitar, drums, bass, ukulele, and spoons.”

“Do spoons count as an instrument?”

“They do if you’re broke in the nineteen-thirties and struggling for money.”

“Oh my god,” said Akio with a grin. “You were a hobo.”

“I was an  _ excellent  _ hobo,” said Levitan sagely. “I had a real reputation n’ everythin’. I turned to a life o’ crime early on in that era, never got caught or nothin’. I did work when I could, but it was real hard for me to get by with no husband ‘cause they didn’t like hirin’ ladies to do man’s work.”

“Wow. Did you, like, ride the rails and stuff?”

Levitan chuckled and cuffed his shoulder. “You bet I did, darlin’. I was master of slight o’ hand, slippin’ by unnoticed, and the occasional B-and-E. I broke that habit when I joined the air force.”

Akio loved learning about Levitan. He idly traced his finger on the back of their hand as he looked out the window. “Wow.”

“If you look to the right, you can see the church I used to go to when I was young,” they said. “I’ve been to about a million services in that church.”

Akio turned his head just in time to see an old stone church pass by with huge stained glass windows. “Whoa.”

“It was wooden when I was a kid,” they said, “but when I lived here back in the late thirties, it looked almost exactly the way it does now.”

“Churches are so pretty,” he said.

“Yeah. I ain’t Catholic no more for a  _ bunch’a  _ reasons, but I love the way churches make me feel… peaceful.” They tapped their fingers on the steering wheel. “Lotsa memories, I guess.”

“I feel the same way about temples,” he said. “There’s a nice ambience, and they’re very beautiful to look at.”

“I’d love it if you took me to some, when we go to Japan.”

“I’d love that, too,” he said earnestly.

Levitan smiled as they spun the wheel and pulled into a parking lot. “We’re here.”

Akio climbed out of the car and shut the door behind him. They were in a slightly poorer part of town, a few houses nearby had some missing tiles and had overgrown front lawns. This road was quiet, but he could hear traffic and honking horns in the distance. A few people meandered along the sidewalks, chatting together or walking quickly to get to work.

He knew he was safe, but he had a funny creeping feeling along his spine that something wasn’t quite right. He could practically feel electricity in the air, like a storm was coming. He didn’t like it.

He jumped a little when Levitan put a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“Alright, baby?” they asked.

“Yeah,” he said.

“You sound spooked.”

“I just feel like something’s off, y’know,” he said. “I feel nervous.”

“Mm,” they said, scanning the area. “I’m not sure if I feel that, but we’ll stay on our toes.” They opened their jacket. Akio could see the handgun strapped against their side. “God bless the Texan law.”

“Alright,” he said. He gave a slightly sly smile and opened his denim jacket. Against his ribcage, he had a small handgun, too.

Levitan’s eyebrows shot straight up. They grinned and grasped his hips, pulling him close. “You look real hot with a weapon, baby.”

Akio chuckled as Levitan leaned down and pressed their lips to the corner of his jaw. “I didn’t know you had a gun kink.”

“It ain’t a  _ gun kink, _ ” they said haughtily, their hand on his ass. “I just think it’s real sexy that you’re a good boy gone bad.”

“I’m still your good boy,” he said sweetly. “ _ Sir. _ ”

Akio knew he hit the jackpot when he felt Levitan shiver and mutter, “ _ Jesus _ .” He giggled and pressed a kiss to their lips, nudging them backwards until they were leaning against the car. He didn’t care that people could see them. In fact, it gave him a little thrill.

It felt good to touch them, run his hands along their waist and up the front of their shirt, feeling up their abs while they grabbed his ass and kissed him deeply. Levitan hadn’t been very touchy for the last few days, and Akio hadn’t really felt comfortable with sexual contact since they fought. He’d desperately missed this.

Akio broke the kiss to catch his breath, but Levitan didn’t stop. They tugged his earlobe with their teeth and continued down, planting hot kisses on his neck and throat.

Akio’s heart was pounding. He tangled his fingers in their hair. “ _ Holy fuck, I love _ -”

“ _ Hey! _ ”

Levitan pulled away from him abruptly, eyes dark and angry. Akio turned to see who they were glaring at.

An older man with his grey-haired wife stood at the sidewalk, fifteen paces away. One of his hands was clenched into a fist, the other held the hand of his wife.

“The  _ hell  _ are you two queers doin’?” he demanded.

“I was kissin’ my boyfriend and not botherin’ nobody,” they said, stepping forward and discreetly pushing Akio behind them. “Why don’t you two move along?”

“You two are bein’ indecent in public!” he shouted, pointing a finger at the two of them. “You two are goin’ to  _ hell  _ you goddamn  _ heathens! _ ”

“Ain’t that  _ our  _ business?” asked Levitan sharply.

“Goddamn queers, shoving your gay in our faces!” he said loudly. A few people on the sidewalk stopped to stare, and Akio shrank behind Levitan even further, wishing he could teleport the two of them away. 

“We ain’t shovin’ nothin’ in your face, mister,” said Levitan evenly. Akio got the feeling that they were  _ very  _ practiced at dealing with this sort of thing. “We’re just two adults who care for each other a whole lot, ain’t nothin’ wrong with that.” 

Akio was a little bit frightened. He did have his gun on him, but it wasn’t like he was gonna use it on some old man who liked to yell at people. He gripped Levitan’s shoulder.

“Disgusting,” said the man sourly. “What if children see this?!”

“What children?” asked Levitan, deadpan. There were no kids in sight.

The man spluttered. Levitan took Akio’s hand and pulled him towards the door of the building they were parked in front of. Akio turned his head to look towards the older man, who seemed to have lost his nerve when he realized that Levitan was a  _ giant  _ who could probably destroy him with a flick of their pinky.

“ _ Fuckin’ fags _ ,” he muttered as he walked away.

Akio felt a little bit shaken by that. As soon as they were in the building with the door shut behind them, Levitan pulled him into a tight hug.

“Alright, darlin’?” they asked, their fingers stroking his hair.

“Yeah.” He almost felt like crying, but he quickly shook off the feeling. “I’m fine.”

“You ain’t used to bein’ harassed,” said Lev. “It’s okay to feel a lil’ fucked up ‘bout it.”

“I’m okay,” he insisted.

Levitan smiled and pulled away. They cupped his cheeks with gentle hands. They stroked their thumb over his cheekbone. “Ain’t nothin’ wrong with us or with bein’ queer, darlin’. You know that, don’t you?”

“I do,” he said firmly. “I really do. Man, you handled that guy that so  _ well _ .”

“What?” they asked, amused. “Did you expect me to haul off an’ punch ‘im in the face?”

“... Maybe a little,” he admitted. “It would’a been cool. And really, really sexy.”

Levitan laughed and tried to lighten the mood with, “Next time I beat the shit outta someone, I’ll let you watch. Then we can fuck each other in a pool of blood.”

“ _ Ew! _ ” he said, laughing as he pushed them away. “That’s  _ nasty. _ ”

“You’re such a kinky lil’ shit, I’m sure you’d love it,” they teased.

“Psh,” he said, giving them a playful little push. “You’re gonna have to romance me better than that.”

“I’ll see what I can do,” they said, putting a hand on his shoulder and guiding him down the hall.

Akio finally took a look around and realized that the two of them were in a bank. Towards one end, there was a desk with a bored-looking secretary, towards the other end there was a long hall of safety deposit boxes.

“Here we are.” Levitan stopped in front of a row of boxes. “Lucky for me, these are combination locks and not keys. I can’t hang onto anything, y’know.”

Akio watched as they fiddled with the knob on deposit box 2117, humming to themself as they turned the lock, their brow creased with concentration.

There was a click, then Levitan sighed with relief. “Thank god! I thought I forgot the combination.” They opened the box and slid the tray out.

Akio wasn’t sure what he expected, maybe cash or valuables of some kind, but instead there were papers and photographs.

“You look confused,” said Levitan, picking up an ancient photograph that was crumbling on the edges.

“What is all this?” he asked, gently shifting the papers aside. He saw a pack of cigarettes at the bottom that looked hand-rolled and a broken pocket watch that stopped at half past three.

“My life,” they said simply, holding up an old photograph.

Akio didn’t recognize any of the people in the picture. It appeared to be taken during the Victorian era, judging by the style of clothes that the people were wearing. There was a man, a woman with a stern expression, and a young girl who looked positively morose. The girl couldn’t have been more than five, her blonde hair was tied back, and she was wearing  a cumbersome skirt with a smear of dirt along the hem.

“Who’re these people?” he asked.

“My Ma, my Pa, and me.”

Akio gawked. “ _ Oh my god. _ You were so tiny.”

“That was back when I was called “ _ Josephine Andersen _ ”,” they said disdainfully. “Hated that name. Went by Joanna when I joined the armed forces and became a nurse.”

Akio took the photo from them and flipped it over to read the back. In fancy writing that looked a lot like Levitan’s, it read “ _ Simon, Caroline, and Josephine Andersen, 1899. Immigrated from Denmark one month previously. _ ”

“You’re Danish?” he asked.

“ _ Ja, _ ” they replied with a grin. “Born in Denmark. English is my second language.”

He almost laughed.  _ Levitan was Danish.  _ For some reason he found that hilarious. “I never would’ve guessed!”

“I’m full of surprises,” they said with a smile.

Akio searched through the other photographs in the box while Levitan placed in the letter they wrote earlier, and took the polaroid photo they’d taken earlier that day and wrote the date on the back of it.

He found another picture of Levitan as a child. This time, they were a bit older, maybe eight or nine. They… didn’t look healthy. Their cheeks were hollow, their hands were almost skeletal, and their eyes were sunken. They had a cane.

“Whoa,” he said quietly.

Levitan glanced over at the photo he was holding. “Pretty sure my parents thought I was gonna die. That’s why they got that picture taken.”

“Jesus,” he said. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from the photo. Levitan’s gaze in the photograph was haunting, like they’d seen too much for someone so young. “You looked… sick.”

“I was a sickly child,” they said sifting through papers without looking up, “Even before I started with Monsoon’s “appointments”. I was weak all the time, I couldn’t run with the other kids and I got tired real easy. Whenever I caught so much as a cold I was bedridden for weeks.”

Akio quickly put the picture back in the box. “That’s awful.”

“Yep,” they said, turning the photo so it was face down and shoving it down into the bottom of the box. “Rough times.”

“Sorry,” he said hastily.

“Don’t be.” Their voice was mild. “Past is the past.”

Akio shuffled through old papers and photos and found a picture of them when they were eighteen years old. He couldn’t help dropping his jaw. Levitan’s hair had been bound up in a high bun, their posture was stiff but elegant, and they looked very…  _ feminine.  _ It was weird to think that the person before them was the same person that was in this ancient photograph. 

“Levitan,” he said in awe. “Your waist was  _ tiny! _ ”

“Corset, dummy,” they said with a chuckle.

“Wow,” he said breathlessly. Levitan with no biceps, long hair, and a narrow waist. He never thought he’d see the day. “You looked beautiful.”

Levitan shifted on their feet. They didn’t meet his gaze.  “Yeah, well, that’s the way things were, back then.”

He looked down at the photo again. Levitan’s expression in the picture was pensive at best. They didn’t look happy. They looked awkward and uncomfortable.

“Mm, I still prefer your short hair,” he said, dropping the photo back into the box. “Just so long as there’s enough for me to grab onto, I’m happy.”

Levitan smiled. Their teeth were white and just a tiny bit sharp. Their smile was absolutely captivating. They held up another picture. “Here’s a photo of me when I was workin’ as a nurse.” 

Akio peered over at the one they were holding. He picked out Levitan as the one on the far left. They had a bright smile and were wearing a smock with a cross in the chest. Their hair was bound up behind a white cap. On their right were two other nurses wearing matching expressions and uniforms. It was cropped closely enough that Akio couldn’t make out the background, but Levitan had a bag over their shoulder with the initials  _ M.A.S.H. _ printed on the side. They had no scars on their face.

“Where was this taken?” he asked.

“France,” they said. “Just around the end of the First World War.”

“How’d you like being a nurse?”

“I liked it just fine,” they said with a slight smile. “Felt nice to help people. That was back when I believed there was good in the world.”

“There still is,” he said.

“Mmhmm.”

Akio chuckled. He picked up another few photos. “Oh. Oh, wow.”

“Whatcha see there?” asked Levitan, opening a letter and skimming it while holding it at arm’s length.

“You are  _ very  _ naked in these photos,” he said, eyes wide. He was pink.

Levitan smiled and tucked a stray hair behind his ear. “Darlin’, it ain’t nothin’ you haven’t seen, before.”

“You look pretty stoned in this one,” he said. The colour photo he was holding was of Levitan, naked as the day they were born, stretched out on a ratty old sofa with a joint between their fingertips. Their hair was shaved into a mohawk and dyed a faded blue, and a black cross on a chain rested between their breasts. Akio could see the glint of jewelry on their body, and realized they were  _ covered  _ in piercings. They had multiple studs in their ears, a hoop in their nose and one on their lip, a barbell through their eyebrow, and two barbell nipple piercings. They bore a huge and earnest grin.

“Who took this photo?” he asked.

Levitan chuckled. “James. It was the mid eighties. He was a real youngster, not even twenty. He had a bit of a thing for me, and we had a few fun times.” They smiled fondly. “If I recall correctly, it was summer. A lotta that time period was kinda blurry.”

“Gratuitous drug use?”

Levitan winked at him as they dropped the letter they were holding back into the box. “You know it, darlin’. Lotta drugs cycled through mutant communities, it was all we had ‘cause therapy wasn’t as much a thing, back then. Drugs stopped goin’ through in the mid nineties, ‘cause a mutant house got busted on drugs and all the people in it were sent straight back to Monsoon. Everyone grows their own weed now, but that’s ‘bout it.”

“You look really sexy in this picture,” he said. His ears were red.

“Piercings kink?” they asked. “Darlin’, you never cease to surprise me.”

“I’ve always wanted a tongue piercing,” he said mournfully.

“I could pierce yours,” said Levitan. “No healin’ time, it’ll be over in a blink.”

“I’ll pierce my tongue if you pierce your nipples,” said Akio with a sly smile.

“Done deal, baby,” they said. They shuffled through the old papers, then they picked up a pair of dog tags that jangled together. They stared at them for a few long moments, before putting the tags in their pocket.

Akio picked up a letter. It was short, only a page long, but the date on it caught his eye.

_ December 1941 _

_ My name is Josephine Andersen, but today that will change. _

_ Something is happening to me. I can’t explain it, it seems to go against God himself. I paid a visit to two friends I made when I was a nurse, Betty and Margaret. They both have found husbands, have had children, and have grown older… they have laugh lines and wrinkled hands. _

_ I do not have any of these things. _

_ They looked at me as though I was a freak of nature. They told me that I haven’t aged a day since they saw me twenty years ago, and I told them that wasn’t possible. Then, Margaret compared a photograph she’d kept of the three of us. I could hardly believe it, but it was true. I look identical, except I am broader in the shoulders from labour and I wear my hair tied back instead of in a bun. _

_ They were not unkind to me, but they were wary. I can’t blame them. _

_ I have an inkling as to what may have caused this. When I was a child and I visited the doctor all those times, I believe that some of the things they injected me with were not merely vitamins and vaccinations. Every other child who visited that doctor’s office perished except for me, although I came close. I believe that they… did something to me. It seems like a stretch, but I’ve searched my mind and I can’t think of anything else that comes close to explaining this strange phenomenon. _

_ I can’t remain this way. I’m a freak. I’ll have to hide myself and disappear. I’ve decided to shed the dreadful name Josephine once and for all and call myself Joe. In light of the recent incident in Pearl Harbour, there has been a massive call for more manpower in the military. I’ve decided to offer my services as a fighter pilot and serve my country so I can make one more good thing come from this strange life of mine. _

_ The fatality rate of pilots is… high. As I leave this letter here in this box in my hometown, I realize that chances are that I will never return. Just as well, I would prefer to end my life on my own terms than on the terms of the doctors that turned me into this monster. _

_ Times have been rough for me. I look forward to living life in the luxury of a pilot’s quarters rather than a gambling den. I pray to God that sacrificing myself for the good of others will absolve me of my sins so I may pass into heaven. _

_ Godspeed, _

_ Joe Andersen _

Akio put the letter back in its envelope and dropped it back in the box. He sifted through a few more letters and found a postcard from when Levitan was young. It was short and had a picture of a church on the back of it, and on the front was a short message from a lady named Eliza wishing them luck as a nurse. A few other odd postcards were in the bottom, as well as more letters that Levitan had written for themself, or for whoever would find this box.

He came across another note that caught his eye. This one was dated to 1969. It was clearly Levitan’s handwriting, but it was shaky and misspelled words were crossed out in places. It was short.

_ September 23, 1969 _

_ They found me. The doctors who made me ageless pulled me off of the tarmac ten years ago as I climbed out of my plane. They claimed I was a Russian spy and smeared my name in the papers. Everyone thinks I perished, but I’ve been held captive for all this time. They tormented me. They experimented on me. I have seen things I can’t unsee. I’m free now, and I’ve been free for some time, but the nightmares bring me back every night. The scars I bear on my face and body remind me of what put them there every time I look in the mirror. I have nothing. I have nobody. _

_ I want this to end. Goodbye. _

_ 17 _

Akio’s stomach turned when he realized that the number at the bottom was their signature. They’d abandoned their name, all they had left was a number. He hated thinking about Levitan in a state like this, with no hope and wishing death upon themself. It made him feel ill.

Levitan watched him warily as he searched for the next letter. He located it quickly, and he began to read. It was dated to the same year.

_ September 30, 1969 _

_ I can’t believe this. Not only am I ageless, but I can’t die. I’ve tried in so many ways. I’ve tried so many times. No matter how I mangle myself, I always wake up a few minutes later with no trace of injury on me. After so many attempts at ending this existence, I can’t help but feel exasperated, frustrated, and just a bit… amused? I must be going crazy. _

_ I can’t stand the thought of living with the burden of these memories on me. I have nothing. I have nobody. It’s been this way for so long, I can’t let myself continue this existence forever. I can’t die, and I can’t let myself wither away. _

_ I must prevent this from happening to other people. I think I know what I have to do. _

_ My new name is Levi Reeves. I ain’t no quitter. _

Akio dropped the letter back into the box. He looked back up at Levitan, whose expression was unreadable. Their hand rested on the front of the drawer.

Akio put his hand on top of theirs. He didn’t say anything. He didn’t have any questions that couldn’t be saved for another time. He looked back down into the box, shifting the pages aside to look for more pictures.

Levitan waited. Their hand was tense under his.

After a few moments’ debate, Akio picked up a photograph and smiled. “Aw. Ryan was so sweet when he was small.”

Levitan’s expression relaxed. They were clearly relieved. “Yeah, but he was a little shit.”

The photo was of Levitan and Ryan when Ryan must have been three years old. His black hair was long and in his eyes. Levitan had a small ponytail at the base of their neck and a wide, happy grin.

“You look really happy,” he said.

“I  _ was  _ really happy,” they said. “Keepin’ Ryan was the best decision I ever made in m long, stupid life.”

“Your life isn’t stupid,” he said.

“I appreciate that, hon.” They started to push the drawer shut. “We gotta go. Watch your fingers.”

Akio quickly pulled his hands out of the way. Levitan spun the combination and locked the drawer.

“What did you put in there, this time?” he asked.

“Another photo, another letter,” they said. “Every time I come back to Austin, that’s what I try to do. Sometimes I put in… other stuff.” They put their hand in their pocket to feel their dog tags.

“I’m glad you let me look through,” he said. “I love learning more about you. I wanna learn about every day of your life.”

“Well, maybe not  _ every  _ day,” they said as they stepped out of the bank and into the warm afternoon air.

“Nope, every day.” He opened his car door and climbed in. “Everything, good and bad. I wanna learn about it.”

Levitan climbed behind the steering wheel and shut the door behind them. “I wanna learn about you too, pint-sized. You matter to me a whole lot.”

“You matter to me, too,” he said with a sweet smile. He wanted to kiss them, but he missed his opportunity as Levitan turned to back out of the parking spot.

Levitan put the car in reverse and pulled out of the parking lot. That feeling of anxiety came back into Akio’s stomach, and he realized something wasn’t right. He couldn’t pinpoint what was wrong, at first.

“I’m glad you were with me,” said Levitan. “I… I never showed that to anybody, before. It’s sorta always been my secret.”

“Really? Nobody knows about it?”

“Not a soul. ‘Cept you.”

“I feel special.”

“You  _ are  _ special.”

“So’re you.”

“Special in the head, maybe.” They were smiling, but there was a twinge of sadness in their voice.

“I wanna cover you in kisses,” he murmured. “I wanna make you feel as gorgeous as you really are.”

Levitan’s heart skipped a beat when he said that. “What did I do to deserve you?”

“I think I should be the one asking that,” he said. God, he loved this. He loved the playful way they flirted with him. He loved flirting back and giving them a thousand compliments a day. He never wanted to fight with them again.

He knew it would happen. Fights happen, they would survive the next one, but he was glad that this one had finally rolled over to the wayside. Things were going well between the two of them. 

He glanced in the side mirror. His heart stopped cold. 

A white and blue van was behind them.

“Lev,” he whispered shakily. His palms were sweating, his throat felt tight, it took every ounce of self control not to panic.  “Look behind us.”

Levitan glanced in their side mirror. Their expression dropped. “Shit. We gotta lose ‘em.”

“ _ How? _ ” he asked desperately, voice cracking.

Levitan reached into their jacket and pulled out their handgun. Their grin was wide and cocky. “Still got yours?”

Akio fumbled, but he pulled his handgun from his jacket and cocked it, like Levitan had taught him. “G-got it.”

Levitan pulled up to a stoplight. The blue and white van was behind the car. They looked over at Akio with a smile. “Ready, darlin’?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be,” he said. Levitan would protect him, and he’d protect them. They would be okay. They could get out of this.

Levitan leaned over and pressed a gentle kiss to his lips. Akio closed his eyes and returned it as well as he could. The words he’d tried to say earlier were right on the tip of his tongue.

_ I love you. _

Levitan pulled away with a sly smile, then slammed their foot on the gas. The car ripped around the corner, the van chasing after it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end approaches, but not quite yet!


	16. I'll Take Care of You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An explosion is involved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: gore, violence, graphic loss of leg, and some good home-grown SUCC.  
> also it's late and mostly unedited so have fun picking on me about that lol

The sirens approached. Akio and Levitan remembered those sirens far too well.

The car veered dangerously as Levitan cranked the wheel as the vehicle skidded around a sharp corner. They sped away from the city, weaving in between cars as they headed back out towards the freeway.

Levitan took their hands off the wheel to cock their gun, Akio shrieked and grabbed hold of it so the car wouldn’t fly off the road. Without looking, Levitan reached out the window and fired two shots at the vans behind them.

“Did you get them?” asked Akio. His heart was pounding in his chest.

Levitan looked behind them. “Shit. No.”

“ _What did you hit?!_ ”

“A stop sign and a parked car,” said Levitan, turning back around and putting both hands on the wheel. “Guess I should quit tryin’ to look cool.”

Akio groaned. He cocked his handgun and unbuckled his seatbelt so he could turn in his seat. He hung his head and arm out of the open window, took aim, and fired three rounds with one eye closed. The first shot went haywire and he didn’t see where it landed, but as soon as he got control of his aim he managed to land the other two shots, landing directly on the windshield of the van pursuing them. The glass cracked in a spiderweb pattern, but the bullet didn’t punch through.

“Shit,” said Akio. “The windshield is bulletproof!”

“That throws a wrench into the works,” said Levitan.

Akio yelped and ducked back into the car as a bullet whizzed by, catching his cheek and part of his ear. He touched his face and his fingers came away bloody. He couldn’t hear all that well in that ear, and he knew that part of it must be missing.

“Hang in there, darlin’.” The station wagon ripped out onto the highway. Cars pulled aside when they heard the sirens of the Monsoon van. “Baby, tell me how many cars you see!”

Akio cautiously peeked behind him again. One van followed them in hot pursuit, sirens blaring. He could make out figures behind the broken glass.

“Just one,” he said, feeling like there was no way they could be that lucky.

“Oh, so the one in front of us is a hallucination?”

“ _Shit!_ No it’s not!” Another van was in front of them, slowing down and deliberately trying to box them in and trap them.

“Good to know!” Levitan slammed their foot on the gas and revved the engine. The station wagon rear ended the van, tires squealing in protest.

Akio reached out the window and took careful aim. With a loud bang, he shot the rear tire of the van in front of them. The car fishtailed and swerved, giving Levitan a chance to pull ahead.

“Nice aim, darlin’!” they said enthusiastically.

Akio grinned and fired another bullet back towards the van behind them. He knocked off the side mirror, but then they returned fire.

“ _Augh!_ ” Akio screamed as a bullet shot through the back of his hand. He dropped the handgun and it skittered away down the highway. “ _Fuck!_ ” He cringed when he examined the bullet hole in his hand.

Levitan glanced at him out of the corner of their eye and worried their lip between their teeth. “Shit, we’re backed into a bit of a corner, here.”

“We can’t lead them to the others,” said Akio as he cradled his bloody hand to his chest.

“No, we can’t,” muttered Levitan. Akio hated how frantic they looked. Their knuckles were white on the steering wheel.

There was a _bang,_ and their car bumped and stuttered. There was a horrible screeching sound and the car began to swerve out of control.

“Shit,” growled Levitan. “They got the tire!”

“What do we do?” hissed Akio.

Levitan pulled over onto the shoulder of the highway, their other hand already on their gun. “We hide behind the car. When the van pulls up, I come out blastin’. Clear?”

“Then what?” asked Akio incredulously.

One of the vans pulled to a halt in front of their car. Levitan cocked their gun.

“We’ll improvise,” they hissed.

“Improvise?” he asked. “I don’t have a gun!”

“Got a knife?”

“Uh, yes?” he said, voice cracking.

“Cool, you can stab a motherfucker.”

The van with the blasted tire squealed up with the horrible sound of metal rims scraping against asphalt. The two of them could hear the sound of doors opening, rifles being cocked, and heavy boots thudding against the ground.

Levitan popped their head up to take a little look. They yelped as a bullet ricocheted off of the car next to their ear.

“ _Subject Seventeen, Subject Two-One-Oh-Three, come out with your hands up!_ ”

“I see about ten of ‘em,” said Levitan. “How many bullets you got?”

“ _None!_ ” Akio hissed. He brandished his bleeding hand. The hole through his palm was beginning to mend itself. “ _I was shot!_ ”

“Shit, sorry. That leaves us with…” Levitan clicked open their revolver and hissed between their teeth. “Four bullets.”

“ _Four bullets?!_ ” he screeched.

“ _Shut the fuck up!_ ” muttered Levitan. “ _They_ don’t gotta know that!”

Akio already had an idea forming in his head. It was a stupid idea, but it was an idea nonetheless. “Got a match?”

“We ain’t gonna _die_ , you don’t gotta light one last cigarette like a fuckin’ _martyr_ ,” said Levitan as they snapped the revolver shut. “Shit, I wish I’d thought to bring more bullets. Stupid!”

“It’s not for smoking,” he said, holding his hand out. “I’ve got an idea. Distract them!”

“That’s my specialty,” they said with a grin. They reached into their pocket, tossed him a box of matches, then picked a rock up from the ground and whipped it over the top of the car. “ _Hey knuckleheads! Eat my ass!_ ”

Akio crawled over to the back of the car, lifting his knees so he could be as quiet as possible. He cringed when he heard a bang, followed by two more.

“Three,” mumbled Levitan. “Got ‘im.”

Akio glanced over at Levitan. Their shoulder was bleeding profusely, they had a red-stained hand clamped over the wound. He kept his mouth shut, even though he desperately wanted to comfort Levitan and ask if they were okay.

He slowly inched over until he was kneeling by the back tire. He could hear the voices shouting about moving into formation. He could hear boots pounding on the pavement as the Monsoon soldiers moved to circle the car.

Levitan fired another round and pumped a fist in the air as their bullet pierced the throat of a Monsoon soldier. “ _Hah!_ Take that you fuckin’ fascist pigs!” they shouted as her body crumpled to the ground.

Akio was by the fuel tank. He eased open the tank and pulled off the cap. He was crouched behind the car, unseen. Levitan was drawing all the attention. He pulled a match from the box.

 _Bang!_ He let out a cry and dropped to his elbows. A bullet had been shot right through his chest. He coughed, and splattered blood onto his clenched fists. Eyes watering with pain, he could still hear the click of the gun as it reloaded.

“ _Get away from him!_ ” snarled Levitan. They raised their arm and pulled the trigger, firing at the man who’d shot him. He was just a bit farther away, and Levitan’s bullet clipped his shoulder and planted itself in the van behind him.

Akio still held the match in his hand. He tried to strike it, but cursed when it snapped in his fingers. He pulled another one out and tried again, only for it to fizzle in his hand and burn out immediately.

A bullet whistled past Akio’s ear, catching his cheek. Levitan growled and fired their last bullet, this time blasting the brains out of the fucker who’d tried to shoot him.

Akio looked up at them as Levitan stood over him. Their arms were down at their sides, eyes wide from all the blood trickling from his mouth, completely ignoring their own injuries. “Darlin’, are you-”

_Bang!_

Red splattered over the two of them as Levitan was shot. The bullet went through one temple and exited out the other, shattering their skull in their process. Their eyes were wide with surprise, their mouth slack and dripping blood.

It was horrifying.

Akio was in shock as Levitan’s lifeless body hit the ground.

“ _We got Seventeen!_ ” shouted a voice. “ _Move, move!_ ”

There was no time. With shaking hands, Akio pulled out another match from the box as the footsteps circled him on all sides. He struck it just as he was surrounded. He held it up to drop it into the fuel tank.

He felt the muzzle of a gun touch the back of his head. “ _Freeze!_ ”

Akio slowly turned his head around. Seven Monsoon soldiers had their weapons aimed at him.

“Hands on your head!” said the one whose gun was touching his head. “Drop your weapon!”

Akio glanced at the burning match in his hand. He looked back up at the soldier.

“Okay,” he said.

He dropped the match into the fuel tank.

The blast threw his body far from the car, he struck his head on a rock, and he was gone. At least, for a little while anyway.

Akio never really remembered what being dead was like. For him, the memories of what had happened would always fuzz and blur to the point where he couldn’t really remember ever having died at all. He would just have a vague recollection of something missing, and he would know that he died but part of him just couldn’t fully believe it.

The first sensation that would always return would be _pain._ Now, he could feel the crack in his head, agony in his leg, and something wrong with his shoulder. His stomach felt wet. Then he would hear things, screams and sirens in this case. Then, he smelled the burning of grass and flesh.

He opened his eyes.

His vision was blurry. His clothes were torn to ribbons. His leg was bent at an awkward angle. His shoulder was dislocated and-

“Holy fuck, that’s my intestine.”

His stomach was a bloody mess. A piece of shrapnel had sliced him clean open. He could see part of his small intestine through the hole in his skin and muscle. Akio groaned, feeling nauseous as he picked metal bits from his gaping wound.

“If I throw up,” he wondered aloud, “What the fuck would _happen?_ Would my stomach pop out the hole?”

He staggered to his feet and looked around the wreckage. The car had been blown apart. He was the only thing alive and moving anywhere near the radius of the accident. Several cars had pulled over to gawk and gape, he could hear people on the phone with 911. He had to get out of there before more vans came, before the authorities came and began to ask questions about how the hell he was alive.

“Lev?” His voice was hoarse, like he’d inhaled too much smoke. He squinted, looking around, and realized that his glasses were gone and he could hardly see a thing.

He heard a groan and his head whipped around. Pinned under a large part of the car, he could see Levitan’s foot.

“ _Lev!_ ” He staggered over and dropped down to the ground. He put his hands under the door of the car and heaved it up and off. It clanged as it fell to the side

Levitan looked up at him, blinking blearily. “Hey there, pint-sized.”

He swallowed the bile in his throat. Levitan was in rough shape. Blood matted their hair, and he could see their skull as it knit itself back together and the flesh grew over it, creeping slowly like the tendrils of a vine. They were smiling weakly, and as he watched the gap that had been knocked into their teeth closed as their jaw shifted and healed.

“We gotta go,” he said.

Levitan looked down at their body. “My leg’s gone.”

Oh. Akio looked down and realized that this was true. Levitan’s leg had been blown off. In its place, there was a bloody stump. “Holy shit, are you okay?”

“Did you blow up the car?” they asked tiredly, struggling into a sitting position. Their clothes were burned and ruined, they absently patted out a fire on their shoulder. Their jacket was barely holding together.

“Yeah,” he said. “I kinda did.”

“Wow. Wish I’d seen it.” They looked down and gasped. “Oh no! My _jacket!_ ”

“I’ll buy you a new one,” he said, holding out a hand. “We gotta go.”

“Okay, okay. Watch out, I’m heavy.”

Levitan grabbed Akio’s hand and he pulled them to a standing position. An undignified noise ripped from his throat as his bad shoulder was yanked back into place.

“You okay?” they asked, leaning heavily on him. Akio looked down, he could see Levitan’s bone slowly regrowing into a new leg.

“I’m fine,” said Akio, his voice tight. “Where do we go?”

“That way,” they said, pointing off towards a nearby cluster of trees. “Camp is that way. We can walk through the woods, going along the road is too dangerous.”

“Okay, alright.” He could hear emergency sirens in the distance. He wrapped his arm around Levitan’s waist. “I’ll support you, okay?”

Levitan shook their head. “Nah, just find me a big stick and I can-”

“Lev, I’ve got you,” he said firmly. He grunted in pain as his leg bone snapped itself back into place. “ _Ow!_ F-fuckin’ Christ.”

“Alright?” they asked. “I-if you’re leg’s too weak I can-”

“Levitan, _you have no leg,_ ” he said firmly. “Let me help you.”

Levitan gave a slightly dramatic sigh as Akio shifted his grip on them. “Alright, _fine,_ we just-”

“ _Hey! Are those people over there?_ ”

“Shit!” Akio grabbed Levitan’s arm and pulled it over his shoulders. “Go, go, go!”

The two of them scrambled down the slope and into the cluster of trees nearby. Akio threw up in his throat a little when they passed a bloody lump of flesh that turned out to be Levitan’s leg, but Levitan merely stooped so they could grab it as they slipped away into the bushes. They could hear voices behind them, but as they limped through the woods they became more distant and eventually faded entirely.

Akio tried not to look at Levitan’s regrowing leg or the one they were holding tucked under their arm. “Jesus Christ, why’d you grab _that?_ ”

“This is why.” Levitan leaned against a tree, pulled the cowboy boot and sock off of the severed leg, and tossed the leg into a bush. They looked down at their regrowing leg. “Muscle’s coming back.”

Akio made a face when Levitan wiggled their fleshy toes. They had no skin on their foot.

Levitan sighed and pulled at their jacket. “Lookit. It’s _ruined._ ” They reached into the pockets of their coat and fished out their dog tags, a lighter, a crumpled pack of cigarettes, and two knives. They stuffed the items into their jeans before lighting themself a cigarette.

“I’ll buy you a new one,” he said again, stepping towards them. His bruises were fading, his stomach had healed over. He felt fine.

“I liked _this_ one,” they said with a pout, dropping the jacket in the same bush as their severed leg.

“Maybe we should bury those,” he said.

“Maybe,” they agreed. They looked down at their foot.

Akio watched as the skin grew back on their leg. The beginnings of toenails formed on their feet. Hair sprouted on their shin.

Then, after that was done, the skin mottled and pitted as an old scar returned.

“How come you still have scars after you regrow your skin?” he asked.

Levitan shrugged. “Hell if I know.” They leaned down and pulled on a sock and their boot. Their jeans were ripped below the knee on one leg, so it gave a slightly amusing picture. “I guess my body thinks that’s what my skin looks like. Same way our eyes always grow back with imperfect vision.”

“Whoa.” Akio considered plucking out his own eye to see whether his vision would be different, but then he realized that would be crazy painful so he decided not to. “Are you alright?”

“My mouth tastes like ash, but I’m fine.” Levitan stepped forward to meet him, their thumbs in their belt loops. “Can’t believe you blew up the car.”

“Threw a match into the gas tank,” he said, hands in his pockets. His clothes were itchy from the drying blood.

“That’s kinda hot,” they said with a sly smile. They blew out a cloud of smoke, then tossed the cigarette on the ground and extinguished it with their heel.

“We’re both covered in blood,” said Akio.

“So? You’re still hot.”

Akio could feel something warm and familiar bubbling in his chest. He knew his face was flushed. He closed his eyes as Levitan leaned in and pressed their mouth to the corner of his jaw.

“You’re so pretty,” murmured Levitan. They put their hands on his waist. “I missed touchin’ you like this.”

“I missed it too,” he said, putting his hands on theirs. “But maybe we should get out of these woods before Monsoon sends more people.”

Levitan chuckled. “Fuck, cockblocked by the Monsoon corporation! That’s a first, even for me.”

Akio still had adrenaline pumping in his veins. He really wanted to kiss Levitan, but they had to get out of there. He settled for taking their hand and linking his fingers with theirs as they led him through the woods back to the base.

 

“ _What happened?!_ ” demanded Yumi the second Akio and Levitan set foot back on the base.

“Monsoon found us,” said Levitan simply.

“There was an explosion,” added Akio.

“I think the two of us need to skip country as soon as possible,” they said. “It’s dangerous for me to be here, I might be drawin’ them in closer. If they find this place, it would fuck everything up. We’ve got passports, do we got tickets?”

“We have them,” said Yumi, staring intently at their tattered clothes. “You’re scheduled to fly out tomorrow morning, early.”

“How early?”

“Five AM,” she said. “Fewer Monsoon vehicles patrolling the roads. It’ll take about an hour to get there, so you two need to be up at three thirty.”

“We should say goodbye tonight,” said Levitan.

“James knows when your flight is, he insisted on driving you himself. A few others may be up to see you off in the morning.”

Levitan smiled. “That’s very kind of you.”

“It’s no trouble,” said Yumi. “It’s important that we get you two out of this city. You already had a close call, by the looks of it.”

“Yeah, we did,” said Akio.

“Is it alright if we quickly debrief what happened before you two wash up? It’s procedure. We keep records of any and all interactions that the mutants living on this base have with Monsoon. Sometimes it helps us detect patterns in their patrols and things of that nature.”

“Five minutes,” said Levitan firmly. “Then I need to wash the blood out of my hair.”

“This way, if you will,” said Yumi, gesturing towards the main building.

Levitan’s boots kicked up dust as they walked along the main road in the little settlement. A few heads turned their way, staring at their ripped and bloodied clothes.

“Holy shit,” said James, standing up from his lawn chair. “What the hell happened?”

“You look like you were blown up!” Hawke’s good eye was wide as he took in their rough appearance.

Naomi was sitting beside him. “Jesus Christ! D-did they-”

“We were found out,” said Levitan, slowing their pace to talk to them. “That’s about the size of it.”

“An explosion was involved,” said Akio. “We caused it.”

James let out a breath and sank back into his chair. “Christ, Lev… we’re right back in the mess, aren’t we?”

“I never got out of it,” they said. They gave an absent wave as they walked towards the main building to debrief with Yumi, who was sure to scrutinize everything that they’d seen, right down to the very last detail. It was her job, after all.

Out of the corner of Akio’s eye, he saw a small movement. He turned his head and saw that behind one of the trailers, he could see Ryan peering over at them. He was too far away to see clearly, and his expression was unreadable.

As soon as Ryan realized Akio had spotted him, he vanished behind the trailer. Levitan never saw him there at all.

Inside the building, Akio and Levitan settled into two comfortable chairs. Yumi sat across from them with her notepad in hand. One of her heads looked down at her notepad, the other looked directly at them.

“When did they spot you?” asked Yumi.

“On the road heading outside of town,” said Levitan evenly. “I don’t believe they saw where we were.”

“I hope not,” said Yumi, jotting this down. “How do you think they knew you were there?”

“I have no clue,” said Levitan. “They may have just been patrolling. This city isn’t safe for people like us.”

“You don’t think they know that you go to those places, do you?” asked Akio tentatively.

“I sure hope not,” said Levitan.

“Where did you two go?” asked Yumi.

“It’s personal,” said Akio hastily, putting a protective hand on Levitan’s knee.

Levitan held up a hand to quiet him. “We visited my childhood home by Andersen lake, and a bank on Carmichael Street.”

“You may want to avoid those places in the future,” said Yumi as she wrote this information down. Her hand flew across the page. “They’re always watching.”

Levitan’s brow creased slightly at that. Akio squeezed their knee.

“Describe what happened,” said Yumi. “No need to go into a ton of detail, the sparknotes version is acceptable.”

“To summarize,” said Levitan. “We were driving. We spotted them in our rearview mirror, and the van gave chase. We ended up on the freeway, they shot at us, we shot at them, and they blew our tire so we had to pull over. I kept them at bay while Akio crawled over to the fuel tank. They shot Akio, once through the hand while we were driving, then again while he was trying to light a match. They caught me by surprise and blasted my brains out, then I dunno what happened, really.”

“Well,” said Akio, pushing away memories of Levitan’s lifeless corpse lying next to him while the Monsoon soldiers closed in on all sides. “They surrounded us. I dropped the match into the fuel tank. The car blew up, sent us flying. We got back on our feet, as we do, but I don’t think there were any survivors. We took off into the woods and walked here.”

“It took us about three hours,” said Levitan. “It was a good hike.”

“Are you certain that nobody followed you?” pressed Yumi.

“As certain as I can be,” said Levitan. “I stink of blood and burnt things. May we go shower?”

“Of course,” said Yumi. She flipped her notepad closed and clicked her pen. She stood and opened the door to the little room for the two of them. “Thank you for your cooperation.”

“It’s always a pleasure,” said Levitan smoothly. They took Akio’s hand and led him from the building.

It was later in the day. The sun hung low in the sky, and the mutants were flooding into the mess hall for dinner. Levitan gave James a casual wave as they walked past, and he saluted with two fingers, half of his eyes following a cute younger mutant sporting a crutch as he moved into the mess hall.

“Shower, sandwiches, then bed,” said Levitan. “I’m exhausted.”

“Me too,” said Akio, although he couldn’t help feeling a little bit disappointed. He was somewhat hoping there would be something else in between.

“You alright, pint-sized?” asked Levitan as they opened the door to their little trailer.

“Of course,” he said as he shut the door behind him. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

Akio let out a squeak as Levitan suddenly seized his upper arms and pinned him against the door. They pressed a passionate kiss to his lips, their leg sliding between his to press against his crotch. Akio softened for them, giving in, kissing them back, and grinding against their thigh.

Levitan hastily pulled away. They dropped their hands to their sides and said, “I-I’m sorry, I should’a-”

Akio stood on tiptoe and pressed a kiss to their lips. “Shh. Don’t apologize.”

Levitan closed their mouth, feeling sheepish. “We… we haven’t been very physically affectionate with each other, lately.”

“I know.”

“I’ve missed it real bad.”

“Me too, baby.” He hooked his finger in their belt loop. “How about we take a shower together? That would be nice.”

“Okay,” said Levitan. They sounded a little hesitant.

Akio tried to lighten the mood with playfulness. “I’ll help get you all clean,” he said, sliding his hands up under their tank top.

Levitan chuckled and let Akio peel their tank top over their head. Their skin was smeared with blood and ash, but that didn’t stop Akio from pressing a kiss to their sharp collarbone.

“How’s that taste?” they asked, amused.

“Like blood and ash,” he said, making a face. Then he smiled a little and kissed again, a little lower. “And you.”

“Darlin’, you’re too sweet,” they said, pulling him into the bathroom.

Akio helped Levitan out of their filthy and tattered clothes, placing kisses on their body whenever new skin was revealed. He knelt on the floor and slid off what was left of their jeans while they struggled with their ruined binder.

“I really liked that one,” they said with a pout.

Akio kissed their inner thigh as he pulled down their boxer briefs. Their thighs were thick and muscular. He kissed them again, a little closer to their body, their hair tickling his cheek.

Levitan pulled away with a nervous laugh and stepped over him to start the shower. Akio shucked his own clothes with no hesitation, admiring their muscular shoulders and back as they tested the warmth of the shower. He noticed large white scars scored across their skin in long parallel stripes. They looked like remnants of being whipped.

His gaze drifted a little lower to their ass. It was a _really_ nice ass, Akio liked it a lot. It matched their thighs in thickness and muscle. His cock twitched with interest.

Akio stepped up behind them and pressed himself against them. He relished their surprised chuckle as he groped their breast and kissed a scar on their shoulder, his cock resting against their ass.

“You’re really touchy,” said Levitan.

“I love touching you,” he said. “Or do you want me to stop?”

“Let’s climb in the shower so we can resume,” said Levitan as they pulled back the curtain.

Akio eagerly climbed into the shower with them. It was a bit cramped, but Akio honestly couldn’t care less. He lathered up his hands with soap and started to wash the filth from Levitan’s skin as they shampooed their hair.

“What’re you doing?” they asked with a slightly strange note in their voice.

“Helping you shower,” he said as his fingers danced over their skin. He could feel the knots in their shoulders.

“Why?”

“Because I want to,” he said. “I like taking care of you.”

“You don’t gotta do that,” they said sheepishly. “It’s _my_ job to protect _you._ ”

“I can protect you, too,” he said. He shampooed his own hair and rinsed it out quickly so he could turn his attention back to Levitan. “I want you to let me.”

Levitan gave a small sigh. He was behind them, he couldn’t see their face. He slid around until he was standing in front of them.

Levitan’s eyes were wide and slightly vulnerable. That look caught him off guard.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

“Today was way too close,” they said. “I just… I almost lost you. We almost lost each other, and if things had worked out different, everything could’a been ruined.”

“I know,” he said. “But we’re here, now. We’ve got each other.” He kissed their cheek. “I’ve got you.”

Levitan let their eyes close and let the water run over them. “I like it when you wash me.”

Akio grinned. He ran his fingers through Levitan’s hair to rinse out the shampoo, careful to keep it out of their eyes. “I like washing you, too.”

Levitan opened their eyes and glanced down with a smirk. “Your dick seems to like it a whole lot.”

Akio laughed. “Yeah, it does.”

“Want me to…?” Levitan’s hand drifted down towards his cock.

Akio took their hand and directed it away from his body. “Not today, actually. I wanna focus on you.”

“On… me?” they asked, their voice awkward and high.

“If that’s what you want,” he added hastily. He brought his hand down to touch between their legs. He cupped them firmly, planting the heel of his palm against their mound while his fingertips rested behind their entrance. “Is this okay?”

Levitan gave a slight gasp at the sudden contact and gripped his shoulders. “Y-your hand’s real warm, hon.”

“Does this feel nice?” he asked, maintaining the pressure.

Levitan’s hips involuntarily ground down against his palm. “Mm. Y-yeah, it’s real nice.”

“I think we’re clean, don’t you?” he asked. He kissed Levitan sweetly.

Levitan planted another kiss on his cheek. “Oh, yeah.” They kissed his other cheek. “ _Definitely._ ”

Akio shut off the shower, handed Levitan a towel, and dried himself off. Levitan walked over to the bed to get settled while Akio threw the destroyed clothes in a garbage bag, then pulled on fresh boxers.

“Do you want something to eat, baby?” he asked, standing next to the fridge.

“There should be some sandwiches in there from lunch,” they said, pulling the covers over themself. “But… maybe that can wait a few minutes.”

Akio chuckled and closed the fridge. He walked over to the bed and crawled up onto it, kneeling beside Levitan.

“Why did you put _on_ clothes?” they asked, tilting a brow at him. “I thought we were gonna fuck.”

“Like I said,” replied Akio. “I wanna focus on you. Do you like massages?”

“Yeah,” they said with a smile. “It’s been awhile, though.

“If you would indulge me,” he said. “Lie on your front and get comfortable.”

Levitan grinned and obliged immediately. They had a pillow under their head, their hands folded underneath it.

Ako straddled their lower back and didn’t hesitate in diving in immediately. He rubbed the kinks from their shoulders with the heels of his palm, then focussed the pressure with his fingertips. It was easy and relaxing work, and he knew a little bit about acupuncture so he knew exactly which places needed his hands.

“ _Holy fuck, Akio,_ ” moaned Levitan shamelessly as their shoulders loosened under his hands. “Where’d you learn to do _this?_ ”

“I have a friend who does massage therapy,” he said cheekily. “Feeling nice?”

“ _Real_ nice, darlin’,” they said dreamily. “Your hands are _magic_.”

Akio smiled as he moved lower on their body to rub their lower back. He worked at the muscle at the base of their spine. “You carry all your stress in your back.”

“Yeah, I have achy shoulders a lot.”

“Why don’t you ever say anything?”

“Ah, don’t wanna bother y’all with it,” they said absently. “Nobody wants to be ‘round me when all I do is complain.”

“You’re not bothering me, Lev,” he said. He rubbed his hands soothingly over their scars. “Bother me anytime you like.”

“You’re massaging my butt, now,” they said with a teasing tone.

“Can’t help myself,” he said, moving down to their thighs. “It’s a nice butt.” He kissed the crease of their thigh, making Levitan giggle. “If you want, you can turn over and I can help you relax in _other_ ways.”

“Ooh,” they said. Akio slid off just as Levitan rolled over.

They stole his breath away. They looked stunningly gorgeous to him in that moment. Their eyes were sparkling, their skin was still damp from the shower, and they were wearing the most wonderful smile. Their posture was relaxed and vulnerable, their chest rising and falling with their breaths. It was one of the sexiest things Akio had ever seen.

He knelt between their _wonderful_ thighs and pulled them up around his shoulders. He could smell them, and his breath ghosted over them, making them shiver slightly.

“I-it’s been more than just a lil’ while since anyone’s done this for me,” said Levitan. “So. Y’know. Keep that in mind.”

“Are you asking me to be gentle?” he asked teasingly.

Levitan huffed a laugh. “Sure, Akio. Be gentle with me.”

He’d never seen Levitan like this, before. He looked over their vulva, taking it all in for the first time. He noted the dark colour, how their clit protruded, and how their inner labia was long enough to suck on. He could see they were wet. He desperately wanted to taste it.

He leaned in and laved his tongue from bottom to top in long, slow licks. Levitan started immediately at initial contact, but they quickly sank in, pushing their hips down against his face. He traced their folds with his tongue, keeping his touch gentle for the beginning. He had to warm them up, first.

“F-fuck, Akio!” gasped Levitan. He felt fingers tangling in his hair.

Akio delighted in the knowledge that Levitan was _sensitive_ . He didn’t take them for the type, but it was driving him absolutely _wild._ He took one of their inner labia into his mouth and gently sucked, enjoying the texture of their skin.

Akio absorbed every gasp and twitch and moan from Levitan, noting what gave him the strongest reactions. He gave a few small, quick licks to their clit before switching back to running his tongue over their folds. His neck was starting to ache, but he didn’t care. He wrapped his arms around Levitan’s thighs as he french kissed their vulva.

Levitan whined helplessly and ground against his face. “D-darlin’, you’re such a horrible _tease._ ”

Akio hummed in reply, and the vibrations made Levitan arch their back. The hand that wasn’t in his hair gripped their pillow.

Akio sucked on their clit. He pressed his face tight against them and sucked, stimulating it with his tongue.

“ _Fuck!_ ” cried Levitan. Their back was bent, they gripped his hair in a strong fist, and they pushed down against his face. “ _Fuck_ , _please keep doin’ that!_ ”

Akio’s neck was sore, but he wasn’t about to quit now. Like a true soldier he pressed on, keeping the same consistency for Levitan to bring them closer to cumming. He could hear them panting. Just to tease a little bit more, he drew his tongue over their folds one last time, just a bit too gently for their taste.

“ _Akio, please!_ ” they begged. Their voice was desperate.

Akio couldn’t help chuckling as he resumed sucking their clit. With Levitan grinding down against his face, he was having a bit of trouble breathing. Honestly, he was _so_ far past the point of caring, he was determined to make them cum. Suffocating while eating Levitan out would be the best death imaginable, in his opinion.

His perseverance paid off. With a few more well-timed sucks, Levitan choked on their breath, arched their back, and trembled against him, muscles tense and quivering. Akio continued to suck on them as they orgasmed, maintaining the same consistency until they pushed his head away.

“Holy… shit…” they panted. They laughed and let their head tilt back, wiping the sweat from their forehead. “That was… incredible.”

“I’m glad,” he said with a smile. He crawled up to lie next to them, took a swig of water from the glass on their side table, and wiped his mouth on his wrist. “How do you feel?”

“More relaxed than I’ve felt in _years,_ ” they said sleepily. They yawned, hand over their mouth. “Want me to repay the favour?”

“No, darling,” he said, getting out of bed.

“Baby, come _back,_ ” whined Levitan as he walked into the kitchen. “I wanna hold your ass in my hands.”

“I’m just getting you a sandwich, babe,” he said, pulling the plates out of the fridge. “Want lemonade?”

“Only always.”

Akio smiled as he poured two glasses. He carried the food back into the bedroom and set them down on the side table, only for Levitan to reach up and pull him into a kiss. He smiled into it as they kissed him, then he pulled away and kissed the bridge of their nose.

“You know,” said Levitan thoughtfully. “It’s official.”

“What’s official?” he asked.

“You’re the best person I’ve ever dated,” they said. “ _Period_.”

“I could say the same about you,” he replied, crawling back into bed with them. “I told you I’d take care of you, didn’t I?”

“You’re right,” they said as they picked up their glass of lemonade. “You sure did.”

Akio adored the smile on their face as they said that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woo, long time since an update! It's late so it's largely unedited and I apologize, I'm going to regret staying up so late.


	17. Dog Tags

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levitan leaves for Japan. Ryan isn't doing so hot.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: just a ton of angst my friends

It was late in the night. Mist lay heavy on the trailers and dewdrops clung to the tall grass. It was quiet, except for the sound of crunching footsteps on gravel and dirt and the hum of a motor belonging to a small car.

Ryan was already awake when he heard the hushed voices stirring outside of the trailer he was sleeping in. He cracked open the blinds with two fingers and squinted out into the darkness. He could see shapes moving and pacing around a small car parked outside. He recognized Levitan’s gruff voice and Akio’s softer one.

He let the blinds snap shut.

He turned when he heard a yawn behind him, soft clicking, and the sound of the lamp being flicked on.

“What time is it?” asked Dana sleepily, rubbing her fist into her eye. Tanner rolled over in his bed, clicking irritably.

“It’s two,” said Ryan.

Tanner rolled his enormous translucent eyes and pulled the blankets over his head.

“Are you gonna go say goodbye?” asked Dana. She had bed head, but Ryan thought it made her look cute. “It’s gonna be a little while before you see Levitan again.”

“Just a few weeks,” he grumbled, folding his arms. He swung his legs over the side of his bed. He picked up a dirty pair of jeans from the floor, sniffed them, shrugged, and pulled them on.

“You’re disgusting,” said Dana flatly.

“ _ You’re  _ disgusting,” he mumbled tiredly. He pulled on a sweater over his bare chest, yawning.

“Seriously,” said Dana, settling back down into the blankets. “Even if you’re mad, you should go say goodbye to Levitan.”

“You’re not my mom.”

“Thank god for that, you’d be such a shitty son.”

Ryan didn’t know whether to laugh or sigh. He did a bit of both, crossing his legs as he sat up in bed. “Is that your way of telling me that I should call you Mommy?”

“ _ Eugh! _ ” Dana threw her pillow at his head, and he ducked to avoid it. Tanner made some clicking sounds that sounded a whole lot “ _ oh god sweet Jesus why? _ ” and burrowed deeper into his quilt.

“No judgement my friend!” he said with a snicker. “We all have our weird shit.”

“No kidding,” she said, glaring at him. “Why are you like this?”

“I deflect my feelings of distress with humour,” he said. “I feel like dying on the inside.”

“Maybe you should, say,  _ do  _ something about it instead of moping around and making rude sex jokes like a wimp.” Her tone brokered no nonsense.

“I  _ could  _ do that,” he said. “ _ Or  _ I could avoid my feelings and punch things until I feel better.”

“That’s not-”

“What can I say?” he said with half a shrug. “Having shitty coping mechanisms runs in my family.”

There was the slamming of a car door. Ryan cracked the blinds again. He could see a few figures standing around the car, illuminated by the headlights. He could pick out Akio and Levitan clearly. Levitan had their arm over his shoulders. Yuck.

“They must be leaving soon,” said Dana. “Their flight is  _ super  _ early.”

“Who cares?” he slumped down onto his bed. “Not me.”

“Clearly,” she said dryly. She yawned and raked her blunt claws through her hair. “If you  _ really  _ didn’t care you’d shut up and let me sleep.”

“Shut up.”

“Make me.”

He hated it when she was right. Damn her for being so smart and pretty.

Heavy footsteps walked up to the front door of the trailer. There was a knock on the door.

“Ryan?” came Levitan’s voice through the door quietly. “You up?”

“Fuck.” Ryan was  _ not  _ about to come quietly for this. He jumped up onto Dana’s bed and opened the window above her.

“ _ Hey!  _ What’re you doing?” she snapped, shoving his foot away from her face.

“Bye,” he said. He heaved himself up and through the window, dropping down into the wet grass behind the trailer. His feet were bare, and it was chilly out, so he hopped quickly to the dirt trail in the trees and jammed his hands into his pockets. Leaves stuck to his feet as he padded along the path to one of the lookouts up on the hill.

It was dark, but through the mist the moon shone overhead, casting just enough light for him to find his way along the path, although it didn’t stop him from catching his toes on poky branches or protruding roots. Every few steps he’d stub his toe on something and curse through clenched teeth.

His feet slipped in mud as he scrambled up the path to the lookout. His foot slid on the ladder as he climbed, and he was sure he had a splinter in his heel. He plopped himself down and gazed out over the moonlit treetops. The mist made his skin feel damp and his feet were muddy and soaking wet and probably had a few cuts that would heal in a few minutes.

He folded his arms and leaned against the wall of the lookout. He felt like throwing up. He had about twelve different emotions tangling together deep down in his gut, and he could barely name half of them. He wanted Levitan to just  _ leave  _ already, but he also didn’t want them to go. He wanted to punch them right in their stupid face, but he also wanted to hold onto them like he was nine years old again and he’d just woken up from a bad dream.

Levitan Reeves was a complicated person, he realized. There was no getting around that. It didn’t mean he had to like it, he just had to figure out what the fuck to  _ do  _ with that knowledge.

“Hey.”

He shrieked and whipped around. Levitan’s head popped up over the edge of the lookout.

“Oh,” he said, putting on a cool look immediately. “What do you want?”

“To say hello to my favourite son,” said Levitan as they climbed up into the lookout tower.

“I’m your only son,” he said flatly, not in the mood to humour them.

“Well, you are now,” they said thoughtfully.

“What?”

“Yeah, your brother Steve was much better behaved than you, at least until  _ the incident. _ ” They lowered their voice so it was comically mysterious.

“I don’t have a brother Steve.”

“ _ Not anymore! _ ”

Ryan couldn’t help it. He chuckled and shook his head. “Damn, should’a seen that one comin’.”

Levitan laughed as they sat down next to him. “Yeah, you’ve fallen for that one at least ten times over the years.” They didn’t touch him, but Ryan really wanted to either slug ‘em in the shoulder or lean against them.

Ryan let out a breath. He twiddled his thumbs. “How’d you find me?”

“Followed the sound of swearing,” they said.

“How’d you manage to sneak up on me?” he asked. Levitan wasn’t exactly known for being stealthy.

“I used a flashlight to see where I was going so I didn’t trip on anything,” they said. “And I guess maybe you were wrapped up in your own thoughts.”

Ryan pulled his knees to his chest and rested his chin on them. “That makes sense.”

The silence hung over the two of them for quite some time. Levitan patted their hands on their thighs and didn’t say a word. The tension between them felt like brittle glass.

“Son?”

Ryan sighed. It seemed like Levitan decided to use their hammer-like voice to smash the silence. “Yeah, Lev?”

“Um.” It became clear at that moment that Levitan didn’t have any plan of attack. They settled down, trying to get comfortable but coming across as awkward. “It’s a nice night, isn’t it?”

Ryan was  _ not  _ about to make this any easier for them. “Seriously?  _ That’s  _ your opener?”

Levitan winced. “Sorry, that was pretty weak.”

“Not as weak as that brother Steve joke.”

Levitan rubbed their eyes with their fingers. “Listen, son… I ain’t gonna pretend this is gonna be easy. I know a whole lotta stuff happened recently, but I wanna have one last talk with you before I go.”

“Mm.” Ryan didn’t know how he managed it, but he managed to pack a whole lotta venom in one little grunt. If he wasn’t so upset, he’d feel pleased with himself. He still wasn’t sure if he wanted Levitan to stay or leave, he just knew that if they stayed, he wanted them to be as upset as he was.

Despite Ryan’s stellar communication of his displeasure, Levitan steamrolled on nonetheless. “I understand if you hate me,” they said. 

“What?” That seemed like a weird thing to say. “I don’t-”

“I’m not a good person,” they said, cutting him off. “I’m hard to be ‘round. I can be mean, nasty, short-tempered an’ violent. I have more than just a checkered past, but for some reason I’ve ended up being the figurehead of a rebellion.”

“Mm.” He didn’t have as much anger in his grunt, this time. He was losing his touch.

Levitan’s hand hovered, like they wanted to rest it on his shoulder, but they didn’t touch him. “As my kid, that’s a fuckin’ helluva shadow to live under.” Their hand dropped to their lap, defeated.

“You said it,” he muttered with no shortage of bitterness.

Levitan sighed. “I know you must hate me. That’s okay. I ain’t gonna lie, it hurts like hell, but I know that I deserve it. Please just…” They swallowed. Their mouth was dry. “I did everything I could to be a good parent to you, Ryan. I wanted to be good. You  _ made  _ me want to be good.”

Ryan glanced over at them. He didn’t trust himself to speak without yelling or crying.

“My point is, I love you son.” They reached into their pocket. Ryan could hear the faint jangling of metal. “I love you, and I always will. It don’t matter to me none if you hate my guts, I’ll still pour every ounce of myself into loving you.”

“You suck dick at showing that,” he growled.

“I know,” they said. Their voice was quiet and defeated. “My best ain’t good enough for you. You got a long road to hoe, kiddo.” They pulled their fist from their pocket. “I can’t always be here, but part of me can.”

“What, are you gonna chop off a finger?”

“Jesus Christ, son, I’m tryin’ to have a  _ moment, _ ” they said irritably. They took a breath and relaxed. “Gimmie your hand.”

“Why?”

“Just do it.”

Ryan groaned and held out his hand.

Levitan dropped something into his palm. “It ain’t much, but they’re good luck. I’ve been holdin’ onto those for seventy years or more.”

Ryan looked down at his hand. He was holding a pair of dog tags.

“I was a pilot,” they said. “A long time ago, before I could heal like I do. I didn’t think I was gonna make it outta there alive, but miracles happen every day.”

Ryan let his legs straighten out. He examined the tags in the dim light, squinting to make out the lettering on them.

_ Joe Andersen. _

“Who’s Joe Andersen?” he asked.

“That used to be my name,” said Levitan evenly, with a slight hint of nostalgia. “Well, it was  _ one  _ of my names. I’ve had a few.”

“I… I didn’t know that,” he said. “You never brought it up.”

“I know.” Levitan picked at the dirt under their nails. “The less you know about me, the better.”

“I barely know  _ anything  _ about you!” he snapped, clenching his hand around the tags until they cut his palm. “I don’t know  _ shit  _ about you and I hate your guts!”

Levitan gave a hollow laugh. “If you feel that way now, I can’t imagine how you’d feel if you knew more.”

Ryan jumped to his feet. “I can’t believe I  _ ever  _ thought you were a good person, Levitan! Y-you’re selfish, and stupid, and cruel!”

Levitan didn’t deny any of this. Their eyes were wide and hurt, but Ryan barrelled on. 

“I-I can’t believe you hit Akio!” he said, voice cracking. “I can’t believe the stuff you’ve been mixed up in! I can’t believe you ripped people apart with your bare hands!” He sniffed and wiped his tears angrily on his wrist. “I-I can’t fuckin’ believe that you told me you didn’t want me!”

“I have problems, Ryan,” they said. “A whole lotta stuff has happened to me, stuff that… fuck, I pray every fuckin’ day that it never happens to you. I’m not asking for your understanding or even your sympathy… please just know that in my stupid, shitty life, I still have enough of a soul left in me to love you.”

“W-what if I don’t want it?!” he cried. He clenched his fist around the dog tags. “I-I don’t want anything to do with you, Lev! Just… just… g-go the fuck to Japan and leave me alone!”

“Ryan-” they started.

On impulse, Ryan turned on his heel and threw the dog tags out into the trees and bushes below. Levitan made a choked noise when he did that.

For just a moment, he felt warm satisfaction in his chest. It felt  _ good  _ to make Levitan hurt as much as he did. It only took about three seconds before that turned to regret. He sobbed, his back facing Levitan.

Levitan didn’t say anything at first. They stood, head bowed because they were slightly too tall for the lookout tower roof, and stepped up to him.

“L-leave me alone,” growled Ryan, trying so fucking hard to be tough and hating that snot and tears were running down his face.

Levitan put their hands on his shoulders and rested their cheek on the top of his head. They still didn’t say anything, and it was the worst silence Ryan had ever had to endure. He had hoped that they would yell at him for throwing their tags away, he’d hoped that they would cry and apologize again and again for being stupid and wanting to go to Japan, but instead they just… held him.

Ryan turned to face them. He wanted to push them away at first, but he found himself wrapping their arms around their neck and holding them tightly. He dug his nails into the shoulders of the denim jacket that was just a bit too snug on them.

Levitan sighed. He could tell that they were deeply disappointed. “You know that I’ll always love you. I might not always like you or the things you do, but I’ll always love you.”

“The  _ fuck  _ does that mean?” he asked, his face pressed into their shoulder.

“You’ll figure it out, someday,” they said. They pulled away from him. They looked sad, even though they were smiling. “It’s hard to find somethin’ that’s unconditional in these tryin’ times.”

Ryan didn’t really get what they were trying to say, but he firmly told himself that he didn’t care. He looked away from them and sniffed, wiping his nose on his wrist.

“I love you, son,” they said again. “Good luck.”

The word “ _ whatever _ ” rose to his lips but it didn’t quite meet the air. He swallowed it down.

They kissed his forehead, then turned to the ladder. Ryan watched with blurry vision as they climbed down and disappeared into the forest below. He could see their flashlight shining through the branches as they walked back to the trailers.

As soon as they disappeared, Ryan scrambled down the ladder and into the bushes. He slipped and skinned his knee on a rock, but he didn’t care. He squinted into the branches and searched the ground below, looking for that telltale glint of metal.

His gnawing guilt worsened and gurgled in his belly with the other twelve emotions that confused him and made him feel ill. He stood straight, hand pressed against a tree, and fought the urge to throw up.

In the distance, he heard the sound of a car horn beeping and of tires on gravel, fading fast as the vehicle drove away.

Levitan was gone.

Ryan sobbed again and dried his eyes on his sleeve. He turned towards the trail that would take him back to the trailers.

Something hit him in the forehead. He reared back and blinked up at the object. The dog tags dangled from a low-hanging tree branch, spinning and glinting mischievously in the moonlight.

Ryan wasn’t the kind of guy who believed in fate or signs from higher powers, but that sure seemed like a sign to him. He wasn’t sure what it meant, he wasn’t an expert, but he took town the tags from the branch and hung them around his neck. They rested cold on his chest, above his frantically beating heart, but they soon grew warm with the touch of his flesh.

He shuffled back to his trailer, mud squishing between his toes with every step. His feet left black footprints on the steps. He slipped inside without a noise.

Dana turned on the light when he entered. She took one look at him and without saying a word, she pointed to the bathroom.

Ryan shuffled in miserably and closed the door behind him. He leaned against it with a forlorn sigh, then he peeled off his muddy clothes and climbed into the shower.

The water ran hot over his filthy feet, clogging the drain with mud and leaves. The nice thing about hot showers is that they hide the hot tears running down your face. Ryan was pretty sure that Dana had already seen him crying, but he hoped that she wouldn’t say anything.

He stepped out of the shower and pulled on a fresh pair of pyjamas and an old t-shirt. He towelled off his hair. I was almost long enough to braid, at this point.

He looked at his reflection in the mirror. He looked… okay. He had bags under his eyes and creases on his forehead.

The dog tags rested on his chest. He examined them again, in better lighting.

_ Joe Andersen  _ they each read on one side. He flipped them over. He widened his eyes when he saw the new carvings on the other side.

_ Ryan Reeves,  _ read one.

_ Levitan Reeves,  _ said the other.

He clenched the tags in his fist, more gently this time. They didn’t cut his palms. They were hot from the shower.

Levitan was going to be in Japan for a month. He promised himself that he would forgive them by the time they returned. He promised himself that he’d toughen up and get his shit together. He promised himself that he’d  _ make  _ something of himself, something that was different from Levitan.

Levitan was a complicated person. He didn’t want to be like them. He swore to himself that he’d have his own legacy, and that he’d be more than just “Levitan’s kid”. He also promised not to make their mistakes, and he promised that he would do everything in his power to live his life without regrets. He knew what  _ that  _ looked like. He never wanted to have that.

He wanted to own every part of himself. His name was Ryan Reeves, and unlike Levitan, he wasn’t going to run away from his name.

He crawled back into bed across the room from Dana and Tanner and fell asleep in the wee hours of the morning, his dog tags clenched in his fist. They were  _ his  _ dog tags, now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaaaaand that concludes book two! this has been such a journey, I can't even begin to describe it! please please please stay tuned for book three, now that my exams are over I can pick up the writing pace once again!
> 
> kudos, comment, subscribe if you choose! hmu on tumblr at runaway-toons.tumblr.com!


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